Having difficult conversations,
I'm afraid,
Is part of life and it is what we have to do to help us maintain or even nurture the relationships we have with people in our lives,
Both personally and professionally.
Before a difficult conversation even takes place,
We can often spend so much time spiraling over what the other person is going to say,
How defensive they may be,
Or we may even start to question what mood they may be bringing into the room that we completely forget to check in with the only person we can actually control,
Ourselves.
If we haven't met yet,
My name is Kim.
I'm a former therapist turned organizational wellness consultant and speaker.
And I am here to build a community of people who truly understand that their mental health and self-worth completely matters.
And most importantly,
That it's our responsibility to be continuously open to learning just how to take care of those parts of ourselves.
So before you step into your next difficult meeting or uncomfortable conversation,
I want to encourage you to pause and ask yourself one simple,
Honest question.
And that is,
What is my intention here?
You see,
When you are clear on your intention before the conversation,
You become clear on the energy and the stance that you are bringing into the space.
Because if you sit with yourself and realize that your true intention is to prove you're right,
Or to perhaps just win an argument,
That is a massive signal.
It means you either need to process your own temper privately first,
Or postpone that chat altogether.
But,
If your intention is to repair a rupture,
Or to find a way forward to heal a relationship with someone,
That becomes your anchor because it's your clarity.
Being radically honest with yourself the tone not only for how you communicate but also how you receive what the other person throws your way.
You can never control how someone else shows up or reacts but you can always take responsibility by focusing on what you bring to the table first.
I often really value time with leaders and organizations to help them to develop actual practical scripts that they can use to help them to become better communicators.
So I'm going to share a script with you it's an example of what it means to set your intention clearly before a difficult conversation starts.
Remember,
This is just an example,
You can tweak it as you wish,
But I want you to get a sense of what it means to take full responsibility of what you are bringing into a room before you start speaking.
You can literally say,
Blame or to debate with you about the past.
But to simply figure out how we can communicate better going forward because I do value our relationship.
You see,
When you name your intention out loud in the room,
It shifts the entire energy and also makes it so much easier for you to hold onto your boundaries without taking on the emotional noise of people around you.
We spend so much time worrying about what someone else is bringing to the table that I often love to encourage people to shift the focus back to yourself.
If this resonates with you and you feel like it's a tool you would like to use,
I've created other helpful resources over on my profile that you can explore and continue to connect with me as we just figure out all the realities of what makes us human.
