This one life you have,
You will never ever be able to satisfy everyone.
Whilst one person may absolutely love the way you present yourself in a meeting or a social setting,
Someone else may find a problem with you without you even realizing.
The problem may be how you speak,
Your accent,
How you move your body,
Or right down to what you are wearing.
But here's the truth about criticism.
When we experience it and it can sting.
It almost always tells us way more about the other person than it does about who we are.
And in psychology,
We call this projection.
It's when someone takes their own internal noise,
Personal irritability,
Or perhaps unspoken rules,
And reflects it onto you like a mirror.
And you can't ever control how people respond to you because projection is actually pretty much directly based upon our own beliefs,
Values,
And tolerance of anyone or anything that is different to what we are accustomed to.
And the truth is that our acceptance can only extend as far as our acceptance of ourselves.
Showing up authentically means recognizing that when people criticize you,
They don't truly know you.
And that is the piece I really want you to hold on to.
Who you are,
How you use your talents,
And how you share yourself with the world will never ever be everyone's cup of tea.
And that's actually a good thing.
Because life gives us opportunities to surround ourselves with what is in alignment with who we are and who we are slowly starting to become.
To satisfy every single person on this planet,
There would be pretty much absolutely nothing left for you to learn.
The people who need to know your heart already know your heart.
Think about it.
The people who want to get to know your heart almost always do so with kindness.
And the people who don't care to know you will always reveal themselves very early on.
Use your voice.
Stay anchored in the knowledge and experience you have built.
Take up space at that table with grace.
And if there isn't a seat for you yet,
Bring your own chair until room becomes available.
Because you are not meant to contort or shrink yourself for people to accept you.
You will never ever be for everyone.
And if you ask me,
That's one of life's most wonderful gifts.
So again,
I want to encourage you to take a loving look at yourself in the mirror.
Put your hand on your heart and remind yourself that who you are in this very moment of time is enough.
And it is not your job to set yourself on fire just to gain someone else's acceptance.
Because those who are meant to receive your sparkle absolutely will.
And whilst being criticized is an experience that is part of being human,
You always get to dictate what you will or will not allow to become the truth of who you are and what you stand for.
If we haven't met yet,
My name is Kim.
And for over 20 years,
I have worked as a social worker and therapist,
And I now consult independently with organizations on their mental health and wellness programs.
And if you are here,
I know that you are here to learn with kindness.
An open mind,
And most importantly,
Genuine curiosity.
So feel free to continue to connect with me over on my profile,
Where I share more about navigating all the realities of being human in this world.
