Dealing With Difficult Relationships

If there are relationships in your life that feel hard right now, try this loving-kindness meditation. The session guides you through offering kindness to yourself first, then gently separating a person from the pattern you're stuck in with them: holding their humanity in one hand, the difficulty in the other, and eventually letting the difficulty fade away. And even if that seems to big a step for now, the practice invites you to say "may this be easier, someday."
This is for anyone carrying tension with a specific person, whether it's a colleague, a family member, or a friend, and who wants a way to soften the charge without pretending it isn't there.

Transcript

Find a seated position that feels steady without needing to be perfect. Let your hands rest, Palms open or closed, Whichever feels true for you today. Take a slow breath in. And out. Before this practice turns toward anyone else. Let it start with you. Feel your own breath your own heartbeat. Your own weight in the seat. Let yourself be steady. Before you extend anything outward. Silently or out loud, Offer yourself these words in your own time. May I be at ease. May I be patient with myself. May I be free from suffering. May I be at ease. May I be patient with myself. May I be free from suffering. Take a moment to just let these words land. Gently bring to mind someone. That things have felt hard with lately. Whoever comes to mind first, There is no need to search for the hardest one. Notice what arises with this thought. Tension, Sadness. Frustration. All of it is allowed here. Let's try to split the difficulty we feel from the person we see. First, Turn over your left palm to face upwards. And then in your mind imagine the person standing in front of you. In the direction of your left fingers. Maybe you even imagine holding the energy in your palms. Now turn over your right palm to face upwards and begin to slowly draw the difficulty, Frustration, Sadness or other challenging emotions away from the left into your right palm. Maybe you imagine it as a grey cloud. Or something else that is a visible representation of this energy for you. Hold it there in your right palm, Separated from the person. Keeping your attention on that right palm. Take a breath in through the nose. And then slowly blow out through your lips as if you were blowing out a candle. Then, Taking another breath in. And slowly blowing out the same way. Let each exhale carry the energy away. Dispersing it into the atmosphere. Until it is all gone. Once your palm feels light and unburdened, Turn it over again and let it rest. Now turn your awareness back to the left side and observe the person that you are holding here. Notice them as they are now. Witness their humanity. And if it feels possible. Silently or out loud. Offer them the same gift you gave yourself. May you also find ease. May you also be free from suffering. If this offer doesn't feel possible yet. That's okay. Sometimes we need more space and more time. You can simply say. May this be easier between us someday. Begin to bring your attention back to your own breath. Your own body. Feel your inhale. You exhale. Your heartbeat. The stability of the surface beneath you. Take one more deep breath in. And let it go slowly. When you're ready, Let your eyes gently open, Welcoming the world around you back in. Maybe it's a little calmer. A little brighter. And a little less challenging. Remember, Offering loving kindness does not deny the struggle or invalidate your emotions. But it may help you feel a little less overwhelmed by them.