Quick disclaimer up top,
This is not medical advice.
I am not a doctor.
I'm not a therapist.
My name is Russ Jones and I facilitate,
I'm the facilitator and founder of ADHD Big Brother,
Which is an online community supporting adults with ADHD in the doing of the things.
We're not just the learnings,
But the doings.
Everything that I speak about is something that you can practice and you can decide for yourself if it's something that works for you or not.
And it is fitting today that we're going to be talking about the doing of of a thing,
Do you want to do a thing and you keep procrastinating on it?
Like it's,
It could be so easy technically,
Like doing the dishes or sending Troy that email or calling your parents.
And I'm guessing if that,
If you're listening to this,
You're looking for a solution and there's an abundance of education out there.
There's multiple different ways to look at procrastination.
Is it good?
Is it bad?
Is it the good kind of procrastination?
Maybe it's the bad kind.
Maybe if you just learned a thing,
You could magically your procrastination.
Who knows?
I'm a huge fan of learning,
So I know that that poll to try to educate myself more,
If I just heard it the right way from the right person at the right time,
Perhaps the procrastination would lift and I could just send Troy that email.
But I have not seen that really translate into the doing.
Let me define procrastination as I am discussing it today.
It is a thing that you want to do and you're not doing it.
Let's keep it that simple and it is swirling.
It is circling in your head and you keep putting it off That's what I'm talking about There could be a multitude of reasons for this and maybe you could unpack it in four sessions with your therapist and get to the bottom of your laundry trauma,
But for this I'd like to keep it simple Specifically as it relates to ADHD try a thing with me.
Do you want to play?
This is not going to be one of those lie down on your bed while you listen to an insight timer guided meditation meditation.
I do those all the time and I love them.
And they usually,
They usually turn into naps,
But man,
When I'm depressed,
They are so good.
I love them.
But no,
This is a doing insight timer talk.
It's about doing,
And I'm going to challenge you to do while I talk.
That's my encouragement.
Do you want to play?
Do you have the thing that you're procrastinating on?
Pick a physical thing like laundry,
Perhaps.
This could be fun.
Obviously this won't work for a phone call,
But while I'm in your ear,
I'd like you to get started on that thing.
When you have that huge internal reaction where you're screaming at me about how you'd love to get started,
But you can't,
I want you to be curious about that feeling.
It's intense,
Right?
When I have a not now moment,
It is so loud internally.
And I speak to this because I know it so well.
It is me.
And if it's you,
I'd like you to play with me.
And by the way,
If you got started just because you wanted to have fun with me,
Then congratulations,
You got started.
Buh-bye procrastination.
You eliminated it.
Sometimes it just takes another person in your world.
We do this all the time at ADHD Big Brother.
Other people is such a magical elixir for so many of our ADHD struggles.
But if you're still not able to get started,
Then for this part of the game,
I would like you to take a second.
Maybe a couple of deep breaths.
To calm the old nervous system down.
I'm a big in through the nose,
Out through the mouth guy,
So let's do that.
I can wait.
All right,
Ask yourself,
What is the next physical step on this thing that I don't want to do?
Literally walk to the computer,
Stand up from the couch,
Open the dishwasher.
What is that thing?
This is called the easy point of entry.
Do you have it?
While I'm talking to you,
Do that easy point of entry and nothing else.
Just the easy point of entry.
It shouldn't take more than a few seconds.
You should actually probably already be done by now.
This is going to be very awkward for me if you didn't do.
I'm imagining that's what,
I'm imagining you lying down and going,
Okay,
Yeah,
I can see how that would work.
Okay.
So because you care about me and you don't want egg on my face,
I appreciate that you did the easy point of entry.
Technically you just got started and stay curious.
This is where your insights happen.
Did it feel ridiculous?
Did it feel too remedial?
Did you decide to keep going?
By all means,
Keep moving forward while I talk.
Do you see how even a simple thing like do the dishes can actually be a multi-step project for our type of brain?
And this is what the normies do.
That's my affectionate term for the neurotypicals,
The neurotypies in our life.
They do all of those steps,
But they don't necessarily have to consciously Walk through it.
For us,
For those things that are not intrinsically interesting,
If it's not novel,
If it's not truly urgent,
Then our brain will know the difference.
Sometimes we need to keep those steps top of mind to activate us because we are not compelled to action by importance.
No big deal.
That is just the way that we are wired.
I still have things that I procrastinate on all the time.
And I've known about my ADHD for 10 years.
I've been working on it for four.
I've been giving back for six.
So being cool with ourselves about this is mission critical,
I think.
And I encourage you to get with a community,
Other people who understand your brain and who you can play with in terms of accountability,
Troubleshooting.
I cannot recommend it enough.
Procrastination is not a learning problem.
It's a doing problem and finding your unique way to do those undoable It requires practice.
Practice when you don't need the help.
And how boring is practice?
Truly.
Turning it into a game to be played with your peers,
That's amazing.
It makes the slog a little less sloggy.
All right,
I hope that helps.
Good luck.
Reach out anytime.
As I mentioned before,
ADHD,
We are successful when we play it as a team sport,
And I am happy to be on your team.
And I'll talk to you soon.
