141: The Power Of Vision With Steve Gamlin

A boat without a compass will soon run out of steam. This is the power of vision, and it is today's topic on The Dance of Life Podcast. My inspiring guest is Steve Gamlin - a motivational speaker and author, creator of Motivational Firewood (TM) and teacher recently celebrating the launch of his Vision Board Mastery program. Steve and I jump into a powerful conversation on the importance of having a vision, what it means to stay on track and what you can do to continually refine your goals.

Transcript

You're listening to episode 141 the power of vision with Steve Gamlin My name is Tudor Alexander and this is the dance of life podcast every week My goal is to inspire you to take action towards what you love live a transformed life and enjoy the journey there Are you ready?

Let's go Don't let others tell you what to do.

Don't let the limitations of others limit your vision.

If you can remove your self-doubt and believe in yourself You can achieve what you never thought possible That's by Roy T Bennett the light in the heart and today we're talking about the power of vision My awesome guest is Steve Gamlin Steve is a speaker and author that blends humor and motivation to deliver lessons directly from his own life With frequent trips to the humor bank as he often says his credo that which doesn't kill me Gives me a heck of a story to share has already guided him through driving golf balls in a thunderstorm Jumping out of a three perfectly good airplanes Leaping off of a 108 story building and plunging into the ice-cold Atlantic Ocean to raise money for charity As long as life continues to teach him lessons Steve will continue to share them in the most real ways possible Steve is also celebrating the release of his new vision board mastery program where he takes you step by step through all the important aspects of planning your vision creating a vision board and jumping into action to fulfill your dreams in This episode Steve and I jump into a powerful conversation on the many important parts to having a vision and planning your future Stuff like why it's so important to know your path What are some of the big obstacles that get in the way of walking on your path?

And what you can do to stay on your path once you've started walking a Link for the vision board mastery program will be available in the show notes to this episode so you can check it out at www.

Danceoflife.

Com Episode 141 Steve is also happy to offer a free 15-minute strategy call for people who may wish to learn how they can engage Visualization as part of their goal setting and life plan.

We're just about to dive into this exciting conversation But first if you enjoy this episode make sure to subscribe and share it with at least one friend who you think it'll make a Difference in their life.

You can also tag me on social media with your thoughts at tutor Alexander official That's my facebook and instagram.

Let's get the conversation going,

You know vision is such an important part of our life I think that these kinds of conversations are things that we can all benefit from on a regular basis So with that let's jump into the power of vision with Steve Gamlin Welcome back everybody to the show dance of life podcast My name is to your Alexander and I have an amazing amazing guest here Steve Gamlin.

What's up,

Buddy?

Hey there tutor How's it going?

So good to have you on this show,

Man.

We it's so funny Like we literally just met through what a common Facebook group right like a couple weeks ago Yeah,

Very recently and all the sudden conversation led to another and then boom,

You know,

That's yeah,

That's really cool No,

I was gonna say,

Uh,

You're your whole line of work and what you're doing right now is really inspires me because you know,

We're talking about the power of vision today and I Can tell you in my own life.

This has been such a journey so it's just so I was gonna say it's so funny how people meet like I Just meeting you and just in the last couple weeks We've been so talking about his vision stuff has actually really resonated with everything that I'm doing in my life right now I just articulating continually why we do what we do,

You know,

That's so important.

So What you know that your whole thing is motivational firewood.

I love I love that whole thing.

So what tell us about that What's what's up with that?

Yeah,

Motivational firewood is actually something that came out of a conversation I had with a fellow speaker at a national speakers meeting about 12 years ago And I was new to the Association and he was a veteran member and he said so young man What do you speak on I said,

Well,

You know,

It's motivation he goes Okay about a billion people say that so what else and he kind of asked me a couple of questions Over and over and over drilling deep.

Well,

You know when somebody Wants to do something when they have a spark in their heart,

But they don't quite know where to go or what actions to take So what I provide is like motivational firewood it's a little bit of fuel that maybe stokes up the fire a bit lets him share a little more light and It make it actionable and he said motivational firewood Do you know anything about trademarks?

He said look it up because I like the concept of that he shows run with it Run,

How many years have been doing that now?

I've had the trademark for about 12 years.

I've been speaking for about 14 or 15 years now That's amazing.

You know,

I want you share that story You were telling we were talking about a little bit off air a couple days ago with the guy who stopped you in the store Remember that?

Yeah That was so cool,

Man.

That was like awesome One of my favorite things whenever I'm speaking and it's great I've had some people have seen me ten times over and it's wonderful that you've got people that know your stuff and they're really You know fired up.

They sit in the front they clap and cheer The people are really trying to reach other ones way in the back or sitting in the shadows Who may not actually engage you that day,

But when you find out later That something you said impacted them Number of years ago is down at a grocery store In what I call the Captain Crunch aisle because that was my favorite I all went as a kid so I was in the cereal aisle and A gentleman walked past and then from behind me I heard a voice Hey,

Man,

You're that speaker,

Right?

And I looked around we're the only two in the aisle.

So I said,

Yes,

Sir.

I'm a speaker Where did you see me and he named the location?

It was down in Massachusetts and it was an unemployment networking group to kind of help give people a little spark to Keep going in their job search And I said,

Well,

What do you remember about my presentation and he quoted and told almost verbatim the story I was telling at the time and the picture that was on the screen that resonated for him Wow I still can't believe that's crazy.

We did the math that have been three years Since I'd been there and I said well most important question What did you do with the lesson and he said I had a job interview the next week I took what you said about confidence about looking people in the eye not staring at the ceiling my shoes or my resume They just have a connection and oh by the way,

I got the job You know that That we just feeling it's like that makes your freaking day man I mean to be able to You know a lot of time especially in the kind of work where you are Let's say we talk about vision right vision is a long-term game always right so we are continually in the habit of projecting that You know It's like the old saying like always plant a tree that you'll never see it fully grown or something like that You might butchering the quote,

But you get the oh,

Actually I love that.

I think you nailed it Yeah,

I mean there was I don't know where I got that from but I do remember some story it was like in Japan there There's there's something about planning a forest or something that you'll you'll never see grow or something like that Anyway,

The point is we're continually working Towards something that you know,

It's so far off and it's very easy to kind of you know During that that gap right between where you are now and where it's gonna happen or fulfilling that vision It's easy to get distracted very easy to get Disillusioned,

You know,

Whatever feel like you're not getting results.

So you're not making impact even you know If you were very convicted about what you do,

So those little moments,

You know when somebody can just stop you You know like randomly at a grocery store that makes makes it all worth it man That's so and my favorite part was I wasn't even supposed to be there.

I actually started out a little bit early and had a little time between Meetings and I was driving up the road and I said,

Oh there's a grocery store.

I should save myself a trip for later It happened.

So there's no such thing as a happy accident.

It's not luck We're gonna say the Beatles had a great line in the song.

All you need is love.

It's in the third verse.

I believe There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you meant to be.

It's easy.

All you need is love stay on your your path your mission your your your You know stay in your lane Yeah,

Yeah,

Don't stare at your shoes all day be looking ahead and engage everything and you're gonna make these amazing connections It happens to me all the time.

I just laugh every time now because I know that I'm supposed to be here right now You know,

It's funny.

I like to use a path because I use that word a lot myself like just the word path and Particularly,

You know,

Like when we we find our path,

Right?

So we're talking about vision,

You know your path in life I like the word path for for one reason mostly one.

There's a lot of reasons,

But there's a big reason why I like it because path There's a direction to it.

There's a movement to it It's not just this stationary picture because vision is very important but a lot of times it's like vision is okay There's the picture but what path am I on?

I'm moving constantly.

Well,

You know your choice is the things you believe Good or bad.

They put you on a momentum a path regardless.

You're on a river floating somewhere and You could be going this way or that way,

You know depending on the path that you're on And I think when we think about our let's say direction life,

You know our as a path like hey,

You're moving regardless I think that's very effective to make you accountable say oh crap,

You know,

I'm looking you know,

Where am I?

Where am I going that kind of thing?

So yeah,

And it's funny You just made me think of something that I haven't thought of since I was 18 my high school yearbook quote Was from the song stairway to heaven it said there are two paths you can go on There are two paths you can go by but in the long run there's still time to change the road you're on And when you just said path that made me think of that and I literally have not That hasn't been jogged in a long isn't it funny how stuff just like I'm just amazed I had the same experience the other day I mean totally kind of unrelated in a sense,

But how the brain just stores information,

You know,

It stores like little tidbits Just all the time,

You know,

I remember I learned one time that that DNA So get this DNA has the ability to hold something like 700 terabytes of memory per gram of DNA that we can apparently encode information.

So now you think about that like,

Okay,

We're giant computers,

Man We're constantly taking in Information memory like that's it's not just inert.

It's being used for something We just don't know what it's for and I find this is this is gonna relate to what we're talking about but You know,

We're talking about vision and finding,

You know,

Finding your purpose acting on your purpose all that conversation,

But a lot of times we go through life and we have these experiences like what you just said your high school yearbook quote and It's it's kind of just like there,

You know,

Like it's it's there in your brain and then you kind of forget about it but then something snaps and actualizes it and then all those little pieces that we got along the way suddenly they You know,

There's this concept in in nature called emergence or you know spontaneous basically that in nature.

There's this Spontaneous eruption of order you see it in ants and flocks of birds out of nowhere suddenly things Reach a very high level of order in organization and before that you couldn't tell that things were gonna do that There's so many moving parts that suddenly they they create something So same thing with the stuff that we learn and it's like I feel like all these things,

You know,

We're on a path again We're on a path all the time,

Right?

So We all have a life purpose and all these little things that happen to us It just takes that one motivational firewood right that little spark to actualize everything suddenly and then you're like,

Oh That's what all this stuff was for.

I realized what all these experiences,

You know,

Initially were unrelated quote-unquote unrelated quote-unquote But now I see the purpose I see that that guiding reason that was there,

Yeah,

It's like the old connect the dots Yeah,

You know with all the numbers all over the place It's like okay get this dot this dot this dot this dot and all of a sudden there's that moment where you go That's what the picture is.

Hmm and it just it reveals itself But until then we're just filling in dots or we're just putting stuff on our shelves and all of a sudden you realize All these things can actually work together And make something or you know,

The light goes off in your head You go.

Oh Right.

I met this person back here.

I learned this here this this morning.

I hadn't thought of that yearbook quote in Decades and here we are in that crazy.

Yeah Ever changing the road you're on believe me.

My life has done it So it's kind of a prophetic quote in a way.

Yeah,

You've had you've had quite the life man So you did you did radio for for how long was like 12 years or something?

I was on the radio for 10 years.

Yeah,

10 years.

Yeah worked 15 years worth of hours and just burnt myself.

Oh,

Yeah Just exhausted What was it for you?

I mean you you know,

Let's let's talk about that because you have had a Very varied life,

You know,

You did the radio to the same comedy doing motivational speaking author You did a lot of really cool stuff.

So,

You know,

And I can relate to that too,

Especially since we're talking about vision you know you have to Let's say you got two kinds of people I mean,

There's a lot more kinds of people but let's just say we were to break it down two kinds of people You have the kinds it's like let's say they're doing so much stuff that it's like wait a minute How does all this stuff relate right then the other kind would be maybe I don't even know where to start Like I don't I don't I'm not doing a lot of stuff.

I'm just kind of going with it I'm not inspired or whatever,

You know,

So you got those two extremes in that sense.

So In this case I can relate to you as well I've done so many things and a big part of my journey in the last two years,

Especially with everything I'm doing was kind of like,

Okay how what relates to what how does all how does this all kind of go to one thing?

So for you You know going back to that whole idea of okay,

All these things are seemingly unrelated But then that one thing kind of snaps it all together So what was what was it for you or was it like a series of little breakthroughs that kind of helped you?

Find your path articulate your vision,

You know kind of walk that that line or was it one moment was like oh I got it now like,

You know what this is this is what it is It's actually been a series of conversations which get me to trigger things,

You know if I if I sit here alone,

I may just think forever and not take an action,

But when I when I connect with somebody in a conversation or Interpersonal,

You know actions where paths cross or I see somebody living an example The reason I got into radio was when I was about eight years old There's a TV show called WK RP in Cincinnati.

I got a few years on yeah,

I know Came on and I saw this guy named.

Dr Johnny fever and he wore sunglasses indoors jeans and t-shirts had scraggly hair didn't shave and played rock and roll records and I said I want to do that In four years anytime we had a party or anything.

I was always doing the music doing the music I knew I learned everything I could about music in Bands and songs and had this friend named Danny who kept asking me when I was 22 years old 23 years old Broken depressed living on my grandfather's couch having graduated college summa come this close which was always my dad's favorite joke With a business degree,

But didn't know what I wanted to do.

I had this friend who asked me why didn't you ever?

Pursue being on the radio because you're always excited and happy talking about it you always do the music,

You know more about music than any of our friends so I borrowed $4,

000 from my grandfather in the summer of 92 and went to broadcast school and was gone all summer lived down in Boston and In the fall after I graduated from broadcast school I got an internship Which is no money at a radio station that we had grown up listening to and I drove down to Danny's house He hadn't seen him all summer and he goes,

Where have you been?

I said down in Boston going to broadcast school and I just got an internship at WCG why and he was so happy and he was so proud and Three weeks after that conversation.

He passed away.

He's 23 years old and It took all ten years of radio But at the very end of my radio career,

I already decided I was gonna leave because I was just fried And I was sitting on the edge of a stage having just introduced a band In front of 15,

000 people in the band were friends of ours I'm sitting on the edge of the stage looking up at the fireworks after the concert and I just I thought of Danny and I said Man,

Can you believe this?

This happened because you believed in me and thank you I tears coming down my face and everything and it just struck me that the lesson is when when you're not quite sure what to do and somebody believes in you before you do and Offers you that little nudge suggestion you should listen to those people and just a few years after that I Was hitting golf balls in the thunderstorm barefoot in the wet grass daring God to hit me At a little driving range near my home and he didn't by the way and I hit all my golf balls and every ball was something I was mad at and frustrated about in my life And then two guys that were near me ran from the storm and left their buckets So I spent over an hour till I couldn't lift my arm hitting golf balls in a thunderstorm Under power lines barefoot in the wet grass got to my car when I was done and the Sun came out I just started laughing Wow,

The next day I shared that experience with a brand new life coach I just started working with and he said I have two questions for you.

Are you this open and honest about your life with everybody?

And I said,

Yeah You ever thought of being a stand-up comedian or a motivational speaker?

And I said actually both and a week later.

He said oh,

I got this flyer in the mail about a intro to comedy class You want to go?

It just it he says I think you'd be great at it and I did stand up for seven years and I've been speaking now for about 15 years Wow But it's just a conversation,

You know,

I wanna little tilts.

Yeah.

Yeah,

It's it's like pinball the ball goes this way to bounces a different way and Sometimes I sit there and bounces a lot as you're learning but then it goes in this other direction very quickly and you score more points Yeah,

And you know,

I think with every I think you're you're very right about it with with every conversation You know Every person in our life is kind of like a piece of the puzzle and they each have a little a little bit of information To give us or a lot,

You know,

Whatever it is,

But they they alter that trajectory a little bit I think our willingness to Have meaningful conversations with people and to also listen and to kind of contribute to one another That's really the key that kind of keeps that pinball moving moving because we we only understand ourselves through reflection,

Right?

I mean through like understanding how we relate to the world.

We don't exist in a vacuum So to find your vision or to find your purpose You have to be willing to kind of see how do you relate to other people that happens through conversations?

You know,

I guess spending some time on your own to like what do you do?

You know,

Obviously you're kind of far along the path in that sense,

But we're all continually,

You know,

Evolving and articulating our vision so what are some habits that you feel have helped you a lot in terms of continuing to Basically,

You know hone in on that vision,

I guess There were two actually and one of them is a result of seeing a speaker friend of mine actually attending an event Which is rare because I I'm just so used to being the guy on stage and I he invited me to see this presentation And he said how many of you get up every day and think of something you're grateful for?

And a couple of people raised their hands and he asked,

You know,

What are they and they said oh,

You know My health my family my job and he says,

Okay What are you gonna be grateful for tomorrow?

And they said my health my family my job because what if you were to challenge yourself every day to come up with just one thing Different that you're grateful for and what I did was came home for about seven or eight years now I have to start off at least five times a week I write down my three favorite moments from the previous day and it didn't In significant thing that made me laugh or I did something for someone or someone did something for me or my wife Tina And I cooked a really delicious meal together Whatever it is.

I Challenge myself to write down three and a lot of people have said I don't have time for that I don't have time for that.

So I did a live video one day It took me 38 seconds to write down three things.

Oh,

Yeah,

I mean,

No we got time for gratitude Oh got time to tie your shoes wrong a couple times you get time to be grateful If you think about how much time we spend on being upset about stuff I mean even for me like if I'm really upset about something I try to set it like a two-minute rule,

You know It's like okay.

I'm not gonna just not gonna you know,

I'm gonna let it out a little bit but do more than two minutes That's it.

But even that sometimes it's hard So you think about the little time it takes you to be grateful,

You know to kind of enumerate the things that you're happy about That's nothing but it's it's so hard.

You know,

Why do you think why do you think it's so hard?

For people to do that,

You know to basically be specific because I you know A lot of the gratitude stuff that I talk about to one of the big things is being specific You know the more specific you are and this could apply to being you know on top of your vision You know connecting to your reason to your why your life purpose all that stuff really?

I think one of the key parallels and all of it is the ability to be specific which which is a Reflection of how much mental attention and consciousness are you investing in that moment?

To be specific,

You know with your vision you got to articulate Specifically,

What is it?

You know the more specific you are the more clear you are Where you're going,

Right?

So what do you think is why is that so hard for people to to be specific?

I think it scares a lot of people and I think those people who actually do commit to things like,

You know Resolutions at the beginning of each year they write down,

You know,

I want to be happy.

I want to be healthy.

I want more money There's nothing specific there So I don't think there's anything to be emotionally connected to and I think you need to connect your emotions To what you're grateful for what you're writing whatever those same people if they even bother to write resolutions Are the same ones at the end of the year they're cleaning the house for the holidays And they see this little folded piece of paper keeping the lamp from rocking and it's got salsa stains on it and the pizza guys Number scribbled they go.

I wonder what this is.

They take it out and they go.

Oh no These are my resolutions Oh,

Yeah,

It's Christmas And so what changes at the end of the year the date they just change the year and they say this year I'll be happier healthier.

I I think if you're more specific if if you're and I'm a big vision guy if you see Exactly where you want to be what it looks like feels like sounds like smells like is like You stayed a much better chance because you're emotionally connected to it and the more emotions and memories and gratitudes and steps You can connect with it the more real it gets and the more you're able to actually chart your progress You mentioned it earlier When we feel like we're going going going but not getting anywhere because we're not actually gauging how much we've actually done So many people quit just what's that?

What's the book three feet from gold?

That's true It's a very very great book great story,

But it's all about a guy who kept going going going and just went Okay,

That's it.

I'm not getting I'll never get there.

Yeah,

And he was literally three feet from a vein of gold digging It's so funny.

You know,

There's this chart.

I'm sure you can relate to it of The life of an entrepreneur and it's it's like it's all over the place in it It's like,

You know,

It goes up.

It's like oh my god,

I'm gonna be rich and then the other is like,

Oh my i'm gonna quit You know,

Oh,

Yeah,

And they're not that far apart Sometimes in the same day you're like this is great.

Oh my god,

What am I doing?

Continually Yeah,

Continually remind yourself,

You know being specific and it's I like how you said you know being able to measure your progress too because you know,

Like for example one thing I do with my My students the one that I teach,

You know privately one-on-one physically with the dancing and competing and things like that you know,

We put a lot of these elements in there as far as vision and planning your goals and benchmarks and stuff and One of the things that I found very useful Especially man to manage failure because look for failure is not a failure It's not a problem until you don't act on it and in order to do that one of the things I have them do before Any event that they participate in especially with you know in this particular case But I think this relates to life.

Look,

I mean dancing to me.

What I do is very subjective It's not a there's no finish line,

But you know what life is the same way There's no finish line in life.

You have to set your own finish line So in this sense I can I think it relates in some ways to the other side of life So in this sense I can I think it relates and so what I was gonna say is we set benchmarks Before the event so I say okay if you're going to this competition this event,

Whatever I want you to come up with at least three Qualitative benchmarks and three quantitative benchmarks that will determine You know if you got what you wanted at this event so qualitative could be okay I had fun or I met somebody new or I felt good in my you know costume or dress whatever else Quantitative could be I did a full round of dances without passing out,

You know There's things I can measure other than just the default of all you got first place or whatever and you know You could take this I think this idea into other areas in your life You don't have to be a dancer or anything,

But you can take it into for example,

You know I'll give you an example of the podcast,

You know,

We're always checking our Always checking our downloads or you whatever your income and your sales fun or whatever else any kind of Barometric measurement in your life.

Don't let that be the only default.

All right,

So I like how you said about measurements what in your own experience Or even the way you do things,

You know,

What what are some of the things that Tools that you use to measure and to continually Not let your mind get sidetracked,

You know by the details by the default measurements of life Let's put it that way because those things are never gonna be necessarily necessarily painting the accurate picture especially when we're talking about vision and where you're going the Short term changes are not something to spin your mind on.

So how do you How do you get your mind back to center?

How do you help people?

What do you tell people as far as measuring and kind of come back coming back to that?

What are the things I've always loved is anytime you see a Association organization trying to raise funds in their community.

They have those gigantic thermometers Like down and either in front of the business center this close and they keep filling in the little increments and actually one of my favorite stories and the reason I thought of this is because I spoke with this vision board coaching client earlier today is I try to come up with a measurable system that's going to be connected to the goal.

Not just a thermometer or not just a tally One of my vision board clients is she just turned 32 years old and for the past five or six years One of her life goals is to go to Africa on a safari Wow,

You know how much money you know when she first said it I said great how much is it gonna cost?

She said I don't know So I told her talk to your travel agent.

Well,

She said she had to come up with about $10,

000.

Mm-hmm.

So and this was in early 2018 So I said okay over the course of how many years she goes two years five thousand per year.

I said,

Okay I went online and I found a coloring book with a picture of a giraffe And it had 12 spots on it.

Oh,

I Copied it.

I put her name and her fiance's name in two of the spots and all the other spots I wrote five hundred five hundred five hundred five hundred and Created a hashtag that I called your Africa That's good.

And I sent it to her.

I said here's your tracking system because a it's a giraffe which you want to see in Africa Yeah,

It has just the right number of spots that you can do manageable increments I said every time you are able to say five hundred dollars.

I want a picture of you coloring in one of these spots So she took that and ran with it.

She actually Facebook lives the coloring in of her Giraffica updates and as a coach I am emotionally invested in her success as well Yeah,

I catch as many of the live broadcasts as possible I'm here jumping up and down laughing crying sometimes and cheering her on because we've got this amazing Way to keep track.

That's so tied to her goal Yeah,

Actually wait to go write it down and we're you know,

So many people especially creative types are so terrible about tracking And just you know keeping track of things we're just on to the next on to the next and it's it's actually coaching her has taught me a lot about how to Keep track of my success and to to structure my goals in such a way that I can Follow my progress better than I used to of just looking at downloads looking how many people were at an audience or book sales or Whatever,

It's things it's experiences Yeah,

You know,

It's really tuned into that inner child.

I love that that whole giraffe story.

That's great.

I think we We get so caught up in our left analytical brains of Like you said the thermometer,

Right?

I mean,

It's pretty much.

Okay,

That doesn't mean anything.

Okay,

We were now at 25,

000 versus they're like who cares you like there's no emotional connection to that goal Especially when we're talking about that motivational firewood that that that burning continual burning That will keep you Towards that vision which is a long-term thing.

And again,

It's easy to get disconnected on the way there Having some emotional connection as to why you why you do what you do is so important I think why is everything it's everything it can't vision cannot be logical.

It's got to be something from the heart something emotional Spiritual something that is like man.

I have to do this Mmm,

The why is it's like the gas in your tank.

Yeah,

As long as you still get gas in your tank You can drive over a pebble you can bust through a Jersey barrier.

You can knock boulders aside Otherwise,

If you don't know why if something if you just have a goal because well,

It sounds cool The first sign of adversity you're done You're gonna be what I if you've ever seen the YouTube video of a cat wearing a shark costume Sitting on a Roomba now the cat doesn't move.

It just goes good.

I haven't seen him but Oh look it up There's a few out there and it just goes and the cat just it bumps a wall and then it turns and it just goes somewhere Else.

I mean the cat's not even steering it.

That's hilarious You know if you're living life as a Roomba,

You're just gonna keep bouncing off things But if you're a Roomba with your know when you're why you're just gonna keep banging on that wall until you bust through And clean the next room,

You know,

And it's so true.

I think people these days gosh,

Especially this opens up a whole conversation,

But I mean especially with social media and how things are being portrayed and it's like our measurements for What are you gonna do with your life?

What's my life purpose?

What should I be after you know?

Feeding us.

It's so in my opinion externally focused backwards.

It's not about the heart You know,

It's most of the time.

It's some sort of material superficial goal,

How do people How do people disconnect from that constant message from how do they how do they?

Stop the momentum,

You know because by default life and education in school I mean it's I think it's changing education is definitely gonna be different in another five ten years Especially with all the online stuff going on but still,

You know,

There's this indoctrination by pop culture that is by default present So,

How do how do people disconnect from that and kind of connect to their own?

Who are who am I,

You know,

Like well,

I used to I played the piano for like 30 years almost and Once I just remember random facts,

But one of them was about Beethoven and how when he wanted to compose something He would literally lock himself up for like a month because he didn't want to hear anybody else's music Because he wanted that that music to be totally authentic,

Right?

I mean coming from zero so now we'd look at life purpose vision and society and imposing constantly different things that they want you to be and do and act how How do you disconnect from that?

How do you find yourself and all that noise?

Well,

I say everybody many people in my industry I gotta stop saying everybody many people in my industry put out their videos their webinars all these different things and What do they picture they picture themselves inside of a mansion?

With a labor geek in the driveway and a yacht moored right off the bat because you're on the coast What a lot of people don't realize is that many of those are rented Oh,

Yeah with the express purpose of making those videos But we buy into it because these people are defining what success is and what success is People are defining what success is supposed to look like and it's funny that you mentioned Beethoven because I do love that I remember hearing that story before there's something very similar in the vision board program that I created and it's one full chapter And it's called pen paper heart and mind and I think those are the four most powerful tools is to go somewhere Leave your technology in the car at home wherever you go.

I like to go to the beach we live about an hour and a quarter from the seacoast and There's this one specific spot on the beach where at low tide There's rocks on either side of you and as the tide comes in you've got waves on rocks in stereo.

Wow,

That's cool I will sit there until the tide is ready to take me away and I will just write What am I happy about my life right now?

What do I wish was different in my life right now?

What would make me happy?

What is and this is the case before I met my wife Tina are we connected with the woman who became my wife?

What type of relationship would I like to be in?

What kind of car would I like to drive?

Where would I like to live?

Who do I want to hang with who are the people that inspire me who are my heroes?

And I would just dig and dig and dig and dig and those became the seeds of my next round of goals Hmm and I've seen a pen paper heart and mind.

Everybody's got access to them.

I Love that.

I love that pen paper heart and mind.

I have a I have a notebook that I where is it actually?

Well,

This is gonna be in the video,

But It's like never know where these things take up,

You know where the conversations go constantly I It's two things.

I got a I got a pen.

That's like a gel ballpoint pen that's super like juicy to write with yeah,

Which motivates me to write with and then I have a juicy fat red sharpie marker so I Much dopamine as I can from crossing that out and it's been such a blessing because I'll tell you when I look at my phone you know we talk about vision and Staying on top of yourself and motivating yourself and all this kind of stuff and it's like when you look at your phone And you have notes in that I don't connect to that.

I mean,

It's my my logical brain that's there and it's I'm buzzing around trying to keep track of it,

But when I have it in my notebook and I Physically write it down physically cross it off.

There's some physical interaction There's just something magical that happens.

And of course,

I mean you need a phone I'm not gonna have a notebook with me all the time the phone has some usefulness to it obviously,

You can you know,

They have the internet but But I think having that physical component man,

I am jealous I I wish I had that little coast thing that you got over there man an hour away.

That's it's We're in southern New Hampshire's where I live.

We're about an hour from anything you could need.

We've got the mountains We've got what's called the lakes region of New Hampshire,

Which is gorgeous We have the seacoast and if you want a big city Boston is about an hour and a half hour and a quarter south of us and We just live in a house on a dead-end street off another dead-end street kind of out in the woods in a small town in New Hampshire and I love it here You know,

I think you brought up something that to me is very very important as far as a vision and I can relate to what you said at the very beginning interview,

Which is in the sense that it was Your process has been a series of these breakthroughs,

You know The series of little adjustments and and constant thing and what and for me it's been the same way and one thing That ties into what we just talked about is This idea of self-reflection,

You know,

There's so much momentum and self-reflection You know,

There's so much momentum and continual You know different directions that are put upon our minds.

There's this saying that I Often say a lot of stuff I talk about which is create or be created.

Right?

I mean pretty much you are either Generating or creating or you know contributing to the symphony of the universe Or you're being created by it and you know,

That's that's a dance Obviously those both of those things are happening but if you aren't participating if you aren't doing anything that raft is gonna move by the default direction on the river and It's your job if you want to get somewhere cool and explore some new territory to Alter the rivers still flowing,

You know I'm gonna change that but you can alter the direction a little bit and and kind of contribute to your direction and I think a big part of that is Spending quiet time,

You know,

I can tell you some of my biggest life lessons and different things I've been just taking a walk around outside the neighborhood going by the park sitting at a jacuzzi at night by myself like Just spending quiet time To let the mind stop we get so we get so wrapped up doing on these little little tiny squiggles that happen on the way there and Yeah Guilty of it as well with technology,

You know,

I slow down at night after dinner and I'm like,

Well I should just check Facebook one more time.

Oh,

It's terrible the TV's 20 minutes later You're like what the heck am I doing?

Yeah Yes Happened last night and I finally just had to shut it off Somebody said or did something on one of my threads which I disagreed with like Spend the next three hours fighting.

Oh,

You're gonna yeah argument because we don't even know each other All right,

Or I can just shut the phone off Relax,

Get back to being me because I'm gonna say or do something that doesn't maybe coincide with my values or my goals if this person continues to you know hit nerves and I said I just want to wake up tomorrow morning and be me again and deal with it then as an adult and That's what I wound up doing Isn't it funny how it's just even because I can relate to I mean especially with content you put out that's meaningful for you Especially okay.

We're talking about vision.

Let's say you you're on the path towards your vision.

You finally found that thing That's so important to you that your heartstrings and then you put something out there and Somebody hates on it.

It's like You know somebody you've never seen it probably will never see,

You know,

It gets us so emotionally wound up.

It's like This is another thing too,

Because I guess you could say there's many stages to this whole vision process The first part is what we just talked about which is kind of okay Finding that path,

You know And then the second part would be once you start walking on the path to make sure you can keep walking that you don't get sidetracked and start walking All the way to the left or right or diagonal backwards,

Whatever Just because of something that happened,

You know how much time and energy we waste on all these things interpersonal things or even the internet like something like you said makes a comment on your thing and You get distracted.

I mean,

Do you have any rules about how you like do you have any life rules like here's my question basically like ultimately You know how low our life is gonna go is determined by our life rules Like if I'm if I'm upset about some okay I'm not gonna spend more than two minutes on this or I'm not gonna eat after a certain amount of time and day Do you have any life rules in place to there are like little barometers like up?

You know what in any area?

We're not just maybe internet situations,

But any life rules that are important to you Towards maintaining your vision like,

You know where the path is Just like a road has you know markers on it or like when you're driving on an interstate It's got those little grooves to wake you up if you're falling asleep,

You know So to me if you're if now we use this metaphor if that's your life path Then the grooves represent like hey That's your own internal rules about life because if you don't have those then your cars are gonna drift off if you fall asleep Or whatever else right squirrel.

So what do you have any I Heard what somebody I interviewed?

And then I stole this from them.

They said I have a AD OS attention deficit Oh squirrel It's it's real.

It's real.

Yeah.

No,

It's crazy.

But do you have any life rules?

I mean do you have any That they kind of keep you on your vision.

Yeah Yeah,

I talk a lot and I tell stories I use a lot of metaphors about climbing a mountain You know your goal is the top of the mountain And you start off at the bottom and you're you're walking up very rarely.

Do you see a path on a mountain?

That's a straight line.

It doesn't go straight up It zigzags here and there and what I found in hiking in the mountains of New Hampshire is the higher you climb the cooler the people you meet Because they're either you know Just ahead of you and they'll wait for you or they'll stick an arm out and help you up to the next rock or whatever Or they'll tell you hey,

I was already up top today when you get there Make sure you go to the left because it's the best view Like these are the people I find climbing The people I try to avoid are the people who make everything a drag And literally they are they're trying to drag you down.

Like why do you want to do this?

Why are you hiking?

Why is that your goal?

Why is I I speak at a college,

Uh where adults are going back to school to get their lives to a better place Maybe they've made decisions that they want to improve their lot in life and you know provide better for their family So they go back to school and I asked them how many people how many of you have people in your lives?

Who complain that you went back to school?

Most of the hands go up And I said how often is it a family member a close friend many hands still stay up I said how many of them said oh you think you're better than us now?

And some hands always stay up The people you need to stop investing your emotions in maybe you got to live under the same roof work in the same office with them Whatever,

But you've got to stop letting them drag you back down the mountain I said you want to get up to the top of the mountain because a the higher you go the better the view And b you want to celebrate when you make it the more cool people you can celebrate with The better I said there are people who are going to drag you down to the parking lot in the porta-potties Because that's where they're happy So be very careful to not spend a lot of your time around People who are just going to drag you down and I always tell people I said one of the greatest weapons in this fight Is caller id So next time your phone rings,

I don't even want you to look at it Go hold it up in a mirror when you see who it is.

If your face goes like this Answer it If you look and you go Don't answer that's why voicemail was invented And they laugh but it's true it's true no,

It's true And then some people say well i'm the only one they trust i'm like no You're the only one who still answers the phone these people know they can they can just Drag you down and and there are great people out there who are maybe going through some tough times.

I get it But when the same person's calling you every single day complaining about something new every day I don't want to be around that person anymore.

And I recently cut my phone list of contacts in half Yeah,

I was in a parking lot in between meetings had a little time to kill and I said Well hop on the phone make somebody laugh and I scrolled through I go Don't want to talk to this person.

Don't want to talk to this person.

Don't want to talk to this person I literally cut my contacts in half And it was the most freeing thing i've ever done.

There's an energetic thing to that too.

I believe because like when you It's all about learning to say yes and no and where do we say?

Yes,

Where do we say?

No,

You know if I have a list of a thousand people It's not just information on a screen.

You're energetically connected to those people and whether you want to believe that or not We're you know quantum entanglement.

We're all connected And if I have like let's say like you said half of those people.

I don't even want to like just thinking of them Let's say bothers you or gives you like some sort of reaction Then that means that that information is plugged into your body by being there in your phone.

You have said yes to it And that's affecting your performance your energy your inspiration your creativity the thoughts you think I I believe that Uh,

So there there's a constant pruning,

You know,

I think as you there's this thing that just came to me I was like two things.

I want to tell you like your Story about talking to people at the college I don't remember where I heard this but Apparently in Alaska when they go fishing or something like that.

There's These kind of crabs.

I forget what kind of crab they are and they put them in a bucket and Basically,

There's giant these giant buckets so that the crabs are all in there And if one of the crabs tries to escape the other ones will actually drag it back Yes,

Yes,

And that's true It really isn't that freaking crap.

I'm like if if if that happens to a crab Who are we to say that we're some superior?

I mean come on,

You know,

So You know that but it's you know with finding your path In life,

I think part of it is you know,

Part of it is the creative side that we're talking about Which is like,

Okay.

Let me look at how my experiences You know have given me the ability to contribute or what do I want to what am I passionate about all that side of creative Stuff right,

But there's also another side of it Which is the the healthy boundaries and the pruning and the saying no to the relationships and the activities You won't part of that kind of thing.

There's sort of the what you don't do Right,

I would say that's equally as important right for for creating a vision and maintaining your vision Yeah,

Two of the very most important words in english language are honor yourself It doesn't make you selfish and any of the people i'm talking about that took out of my phone It doesn't mean they're bad people It just means the energy we share whenever we communicate Invariably goes down a path of them complaining over and over.

Yeah,

They're diffusers.

They're not enhancers to what you're doing They they diffuse it in some way they kind of take the joy out of a lot of conversations and When you've given the same advice to somebody 10 times in a row and they're still complaining But they refuse to take any action to do anything about it.

I'm sorry i'm exhausted Yeah,

I I get physically tired when I talk to people in jack canfield co-creative chicken soup for the soul series He calls them psychic vampires and they can walk in a room And just drain the energy or it's what he calls the eat it awful club that hangs out at the bar You know one guy complains and somebody else goes you think you got it bad?

Yeah And all of a sudden they're all swirling a skit the dream,

But it's true.

It's true.

Yeah Yeah,

I prefer to walk into a place and plug into the energy and if I could bring up the vibration Like just being genuinely me Great,

Because we never know what other people are dealing with in their life So I like to walk into a situation and make somebody laugh Especially if it's stranger and just make their day better and it's so easy to do If you keep your eyes just looking and listening for opportunities and when you know I'm a fast-paced creative individual.

I spend most of my time working from home in the recording studio if i'm not on stage somewhere After a day and a half without human contact.

I get a little wonky.

Oh,

Yeah for sure a little down and just Just in a funk and somebody asked me how do you get out of that?

I said well I drive five miles into town And I commit an act of kindness or two or ten however many times I've been in town Two or ten however many it takes For me to recharge and what happens often I go home with an idea for a radio show a video an article From it.

Yeah,

You get re-inspired Yeah,

Just by plugging.

I mean this conversation It's effortless,

Which is the ultimate that is the highest praise I give To anybody have a conversation with it is effortless Yeah,

Absolutely.

Wow,

And it's a great conversation You know,

I think you brought up something another important thing.

Gosh all this stuff.

I love this stuff because vision is so important man.

It's like Especially in today.

We have so many distractions and so many ways to go by the wayside and to me It's like a it's a blessing and a curse because on one side you have All this technology all this tools to basically actualize yourself and to contribute and to make money contributing in in so many cool ways But you know,

It's like everything is a double-edged blade,

You know,

So with that same level of access We have so many opportunities to get distracted binge watch sit there doing nothing with our life,

You know It's so it's like it's double-edged blades.

That's why I think this conversation is so so important But you you brought me to this idea of of again when you know your path You also know where it's not Right.

So the clearer you are about Who you are what you're doing.

You also know what is not on that path,

Right?

It's when we don't define it that we That we're not basically on it.

Now.

The other thing too is I think We mentioned about the the effortlessness to you brought up another idea,

Which is this idea that This has been something recently in my life too that I've been really thinking about but if you look at i'm gonna kind of veer off a little bit on some science because i'm a geek when it comes to like quantum physics stuff,

But That's well if you look at everything in nature it has this Energetic signature which is called the torus which is like this donut kind of shape you look at the magnetic field of the heart Magnetic field of the earth you look at an apple you look at a tree.

It's all the same Pattern it's this energy little explosion that's infinite.

It just keeps going whoosh whoosh whoosh and it's kind of up and down So in that sense when you look at that around every morning I try to go outside to connect to that idea to connect to nature to remind myself that life is not this like Oh type of thing but it's this ever expanding limitless flow Constant there is no limit.

It's just constant.

It's our brains that change and we're not going to do that It's just constant.

It's our brains that shrink and feel Shortage and scarcity and all this kind of stuff.

So one thing that you you brought up is that Ultimately,

We don't have to do anything to we just have to Realign ourselves so that that natural flow can come through,

You know Like when you go out and let's say,

You know after a long day being burned out I can relate to that too for me It's going outside riding my bike and I come back.

I'm like,

Oh boom suddenly i'm inspired again Like a lot of times I think when we're pursuing a vision And don't even tell me if you can relate to this.

Um When we pursue a vision a lot of times we feel like god,

What's that next thing?

Like what am I going to you know,

You're trying to be creative and in reality,

You don't need to try to be creative You just need to fix the misalignments going on whether you're burned out whether you need recovery whether you are thinking too hard You know,

There's some misalignment whether you're hanging on to something you haven't forgiven somebody or you have some interpersonal drama some internal misalignment That is preventing that natural flow that natural default flow that creation is constantly happening From happening through you right?

So through it's preventing your path Through expressing itself through you.

Let's put it that way like your path is there It's just up to you whether you want to allow it to express itself through you right because we we get distracted We like you said,

We're afraid You know we get uh,

You know ashamed or whatever else,

You know,

All these negative emotions that that misalign us and cut off that flow From expressing our vision.

Hmm,

And it happens a lot I I was on a coaching call with somebody this morning and she's stuck She she kind of knows where she wants to be but there's some things holding her up She doesn't know what to decide and she doesn't yet have the knowledge of the skill set to weigh out both options So she is stuck I said well here's how I overcome that because I get stuck a lot.

I've been stuck many times over the years.

Oh,

Yeah You just you you sit there and gather dust.

It's almost like you're sitting there in neutral and you know You're still running out of gas,

But you're not getting anywhere Yeah,

That's a good analogy.

I like that.

You've got to be willing to start letting inviting the right people into your circle And about 15 months ago a buddy of mine called said oh,

Hey,

Man,

How's that?

You know vision board program it got released as a physical product about four years ago It did pretty well what I so many people wanted it in digital format and I I spent a year Trying to like CDs or something or it was CDs at the time.

Yeah,

I get you it's so expensive to even create one It's like $30.

It costs me per copy And run them back and forth to staples And so I wanted it to be digital and I spent about a year trying to build a website Membership and deliveries and just finally just imploded.

Yeah,

And it just died and this this buddy of mine called me up goes Hey,

Man,

I haven't talked to you in forever.

Hey,

How's that vision board thing come and I said well dusty He goes well,

What's the matter?

He goes let's let's Let's hang on the phone and try to solve this and he says well,

What are your roadblocks?

I said well building Building a website and digital delivery system.

He goes,

Okay,

That's Lonnie.

What else?

It's crafting effective sales copy to take my creative brain and wrap it into needs and desires for people he goes Okay,

That's Jason What else I said actually selling it and goes that's me and I'll help you.

What else?

We ran through every objection and now for the past 15 months I've been running with this group of people whom I was aware of but hadn't invited hadn't invested in to be a part of my journey and it took about a year's worth of Consistent work and it's now the greatest thing that I've ever been a part of Because I had my vision but again I was spinning in neutral going well,

I don't know how to build the web Site,

I don't know how to do this.

I don't know how to do that.

So I'm just sitting there looking around stuck And all I had to do is reach out my hand to people who have those skills Who will be compatible with me because there's no shortage of people out there who will separate you from your money and build you a website But see I have to be in alignment you mentioned that word earlier and I love that when you said it Yeah in alignment with the people you're walking,

You know share at least part of a journey together.

Maybe their desired outcome Isn't the same as yours maybe you get near the top and they'll veer over for their view and you'll go for yours Yeah,

But you got to be willing to do that You can't do it all And if part of your vision requires other people then you do some research and you dig and you ask And you find out who the best of these other people are and you hold your hand out and said you know what?

I need to walk with you for a bit.

What do I need to do?

You know what and I I I think any vision really we're talking about vision any vision That's worthwhile is going to be something you can accomplish On your own.

Hmm.

And there's so many people out there who go.

Oh,

I'm 100 self-made honestly don't believe that no no Because maybe you created the program maybe you created the delivery system Maybe you're selling it but somebody out there is investing the money into it You may have created all the value and i'm not gonna take that away from anybody.

Yeah,

Absolutely but a bunch of people invested money for you to Make that first million.

So you had your audience your clients your customers.

They're part of it You're not a hundred percent self-made maybe you're 98 self-made and everybody else bought it Well,

It's like,

You know in a vacuum.

It's like a chain.

Yeah,

Nobody's in a vacuum.

We're all interdependent,

You know,

It's like it's I think that's uh That's a good point to talk about especially with being a very Especially here kind of in the western world.

We're so focused on that growth and independence and yeah,

You know self-made one man you know duke nukem,

You know the cut type of thing and it's I think it's like we're where we get off.

I talk about this a lot which is there's a duality always in everything between The obvious and the non-obvious and especially in the world we live in today I think that the danger is that we are growing more and more to look and put attention and respect and value only the obvious And not see the non-obvious when you look at a tree It doesn't occur to you that there's roots.

You have to think about that.

You have to pay attention You have to listen you have to see after listening to that that it's that torus and it's a shape and it's a You know a little bit of a It's not just a static picture like all that stuff takes listening and it's not obvious and same thing with The idea of like i'm self-made even if i'm like,

Okay.

I did all this stuff myself like That's the obvious part but you don't see all the non-obvious connections and little serendipities and like you said people and audience and That one job if that job didn't happen despite that it was only one percent You wouldn't like the weakest link in the chain the chain wouldn't be a problem Even if it wasn't for the weakest link.

Do you know what I mean?

So So in that sense,

It's like in from that perspective every segment is equally important You know in that sense so we it gives us back.

I think it brings us back to humility And remembering that everything is connected when yeah Well,

It's like the people you see running a race and they're elbowing the other people out of the way or tripping somebody and at the End they're jumping up down up and down saying I won I won Well,

No,

You didn't you know,

It's say we're running up a mountain this person's tripping other people tell pointing them down the wrong trail And just so he or she can get to the top and celebrate and jump up and down and say I won I won What did you really win?

I would rather hang with as many cool people as possible all go up the mountain together and all be able to share that first view when you hit the peak whether it's a sunrise or a sunset or in the case of A mountain I like to hike up here and jump up and down and then I'll be able to do that And I like to hike up here in new hampshire.

It overlooks.

It's it's called mount major It overlooks alton bay of lake uniposaki,

Which is it's like an oil painting.

It is gorgeous and I would rather get to the top and Look at the person I climbed all the way up with or even just part of the way together and say Isn't that gorgeous?

I'm so happy we get to enjoy this together because if I don't see that person for 10 years We run into each other.

What's the first thing we're going to talk about?

Remember that time?

We we hit the top of mount major And all of a sudden through neural pathways We get to experience those emotions again.

I don't have to be there first.

I just want to be there at whatever level of success And enjoy the people that i'm working with Because there are plenty of people out there.

You may as well find people you're going to dig working with You know that reminds you this quote is so profound that I often refer to when we talk about this kind of stuff like paths It's that and you could apply this to any relationship but it says true Love is not two people looking at each other but two people looking outwards towards a common future And I think you could say that about any you know,

Good relationship or connection,

Which is basically hey Are we looking at that sunset?

Or am I looking at you trying to get your admiration that I won or you know in this case,

You know,

Whatever else,

Right?

So Uh,

I think that's such a good quote about continually focus Shifting that focus to where it needs to be Um,

Well,

What's your uh,

Let's talk a little bit about that vision board program.

That's pretty exciting man I mean that that's really cool.

So that's been out for How long the digital uh,

The the physical product came out about four years ago?

Yeah,

It's been a seven year process.

You gotcha and I You know owning a recording studio is a blessing and a curse because you have all the time in the world to get it perfect There are 12 versions of this program in my recording studio computer and they're just slight variations in each each one Each one there are 12 versions,

Uh,

And they all have one thing in common They have the word final in the file name in 11.

2 final three Yeah,

Right through to final 12.

I know what that's every single time.

I would say well,

It's it's good,

But it's not quite there Yeah,

And then one day again a conversation with a friend a nudge I had a friend who went to a Somebody who was internationally famous had a law of attraction vision board event down in new jersey a whole weekend event My friend came home and said,

You know that event I went to that person needs to hire you I'm thinking that person doesn't even know I exist And she said you know how you talk about how important it is to know why you want everything you want on your vision board I said,

Yeah,

I said that person's people never even mentioned it.

That's why I like going to your events And I looked at my program and it wasn't in there And a week later it was and that was version 12 There and that was the day I said well,

Okay if I do this this part can't have happened yet that goes here That goes here and I looked at it and i'll get goosebumps and went That's it And so it came out it did pretty well But I wanted it to be digital had a lot of requests for it to be digital And I just kind of abandoned it but now it is digital essentially It's 10 audio modules all 10 added together are less than 75 minutes of audio.

Sweet It's I hold your hand we walk you this far you do the work You do the work Grab your hand again.

We walk this far you do the work in When people have vision board parties,

You know wine cheese crackers blue sticks Wine and scissors probably not a good combination.

Anyway,

Not a good idea It's a carbon arts and crafts project in my version.

You don't even gather your pictures until module seven out of ten Everything else pen paper heart and mind is in there Knowing your why is in there assessing where you are now where you want to be?

In vivid detail is all there and I think it's For for my money It's the most easily accessible actionable program i've ever seen and so many people told me Well,

You need to make it like a 12 cd set and a bonus three Yeah,

Some giant thing a 400 page book and going I don't read 400 page books So i'm not going to write a 400 page book as I as a highly Fast-paced creative.

I need to give me some instruction Give me some instruction.

Let me do the work and then give me the next instruction.

That's what I created.

Yeah That's awesome,

Man.

Yeah,

I'm going to put a link for it.

So People who are listening there's going to be in the show notes for this episode a link to access steve's Awesome,

Awesome vision program.

That's really cool,

Man.

I'm super excited vision again.

It's such an important thing Such an important thing today like we've been talking about such a big deal Yeah,

And strike as many of your senses as you can with it You know,

Some people just say I want it to look like this Well,

What does it feel like?

You know in the case of a car I asked a woman one time or as a live event I said who has a dream car they'd love to drive and I saw this little hand stick up in the back of the room And and she stood up and she was all of about five foot nothing And in curly white hair and she says well i'm retiring this year and I want to get a corvette And everybody looked like wow,

You know,

They she was just you know,

Mild-mannered She wants to cruise around all summer in a corvette.

I said great.

What year she has 74 Nice color she said bright orange.

Oh boy hugger orange that that was the chevy color She even knew the name hugger orange or orange.

I said what color is the interior?

And she said white I said cloth she goes honey leather Oh And everyone's looking at her I wound up emailing her a picture I found a 74 corvette white,

You know convertible and sent her a picture of it,

But everyone looked at her differently I said,

Do you know what there's one for sale?

She goes?

Yeah,

I said,

All right who wants to take Barbara for out to lunch tomorrow and take a picture of her pose sitting in this corvette That's awesome.

And so it hit every sense and I said,

Yeah,

How fast will you go?

She goes speed limits 55.

I said how fast will you go?

She goes 90 90.

Yeah,

Of course But it was such an experience because it was it hit all the senses.

She knew what it sounded like I said who's your favorite music you're gonna play in in the stereo.

She goes elvis great And so hit everything it's not just I want a fast car.

She wanted a 74 hugger orange corvette convertible White leather interior so she could play elvis.

Yeah,

And she's sculpting it,

You know when you do that I think it's so important because you're sculpting that future literally you're sculpting that that destination the more specific you are Like you said with how it feels taste,

You know,

All those senses It becomes so real for you and I truly believe that it's like that Act of sculpting it and sculpting and sculpting it draws you towards that future inevitably And it makes you aware of opportunities it it activates the reticular activating system It's like when you buy a car all of a sudden you realize So many other people own this car now they were already there.

You just weren't aware you weren't in tune.

That's true Do it and and it happens with everything If you want to write a book all of a sudden you're going to see and hear all these other people talking about writing a book and someone who knows an editor someone who knows a cover design person and you're going to just meet and connect with all these people And you're going to wonder the first five six seven eighty times wow That was lucky And it's not luck.

It's it's just being in tune because you know what you want Isn't that interesting how we I totally forgot about the reticular activating system But it's really how it it's like all these little serendipities that happen.

It's like all the information is already there It was just waiting to be Activated is that little spark,

You know to get it going?

Yeah,

And those are the conversations I love to have with people go to a networking event and people going who are you?

What do you do?

I like to walk in and say hey,

Who's your favorite person you solved the problem for this week?

It's like oh,

I gotta think about that one Cancer and shift and they start talking and I go so what's your favorite part of your job?

And I asked that one time in an unemployment networking Group speech I was giving A first person I asked I said,

So what do you do?

She goes i've been in insurance for 25 years I said,

What do you love most about it?

She goes nothing it sucks And I said,

What would you rather be doing and she throws her thumb over her shoulder she goes this is my neighbor She lives,

You know a couple houses away.

We're not going to be able to do that She lives in a couple houses away.

We want to start our own cupcake business.

Oh,

There you go and they both just lit up And I said online or a storefront she goes.

Oh,

No,

No online for now We have you know,

We can we have can cook,

You know here we have this place And I said,

Okay do me a favor spin in your chairs because I want to see let everyone in the back of the room see How you just changed talking about something you're passionate about?

Yeah,

And I said what would your sign look like?

And she goes well,

I don't know but my daughter's very creative graphically.

I said good have her design your sign And we just had this conversation that just made everything very very real and I tell people in those groups What is your dream job?

What is your dream company?

You want to work for us?

Do me a favor?

Create your own business card With your dream title for your dream company.

I said,

But don't hand it out at networking events This is just you don't commit that early Yeah,

And some people raised a hand and said boy.

I came in here just saying I want a job But then it helped to narrow that field and listen for opportunities and Some of those notes that I get back at the guy in the captain crunch aisle One of them actually made my mom cry.

I let her read the note of what somebody went and did She said there was a company I was afraid to go apply for because I didn't think I was good enough But I heard what you said they were my dream company.

So I inquired went for an interview got hired That one made my mom cry Yeah,

That was that was a big story man.

That's I can't imagine that so what a phenomenal Experience,

You know to draw you back to your why like yes,

You know,

I i'm doing the right thing.

I'm on my path.

I'm I'm doing what I need to be doing It's it's the greatest.

I mean that was now five years ago since the captain crunch Story happened.

Wow,

And I I still and this is something I learned from a speaker named james malanchak And he's a speaker and he also coaches a bunch of people on building their their speaking business And somebody at one of his boot camps and the recordings I invested in said,

You know,

I don't tell stories.

I relive them James said Repeat that near the microphone.

He says I don't tell stories.

I relive them So everything I share whether it's on stage writing an article i'm emotionally connected because it makes It increases the opportunity that magnetically something is going to come my way.

Absolutely really paying attention And that's that's important for everything.

I do.

I've i've never I i've tried to never ever ever take anything for granted That happens to me in my speaking career or my writing Somebody recently reached out to me for an article I submitted to success profiles magazine for our mutual friend.

Brian k right.

Yeah,

Brian sent me a message He goes boy that article just really resonated for me because I lost my dad almost a year ago Wow,

And I wrote an article about a great lesson My dad taught me when he was my little league coach when I was eight years old about cheering people on always beat You know,

He'd he'd go chatter up.

Let's you know Haul her up.

Let's hear some chatter.

Mm-hmm He would always tell us if you're in the field you cheer on your pitcher if you're in the dugout and you're at bat You cheer on whoever's up at the plate And I shared that lesson in an article and actually made me cry to write the article because I just miss him dearly Brian said he reached out and he goes man.

I felt that because I still have my dad But it made me think of the lessons.

My dad teaches me.

It's crazy I should probably call my dad today and you know and just just talk with them Yeah,

So always just be connected to why you do what you do and all these incredible And all these incredible little nudges and thank yous are going to come your way to keep you on that path because we get We get disheartened.

We have failures.

I had a really bad speaking event early in my career that nearly ended my career Because somebody offered me a decent chunk of money and said well They're aeronautical engineers.

Can you speak to them?

I said I can speak to anybody Boy,

Was I wrong It failed miserably it was what was the speech supposed to be about it was motivational And of course you're talking about a bunch of analytical people didn't even have a handout didn't have any bullet points now i'm just up there telling stories and cracking jokes as part of my opening and it was uh,

I equate it because now it's a punchline now About you know knowing what you want knowing it's a good fit Yeah,

But at the time I said it's like one of those old world war ii movies where somebody would shoot the plane And it didn't explode like they do now it you know a couple of holes in the fuselage and then a little smoke would come out a little oil and then fire and then then it would just kind of trail and For a while and it would crash I got shot three minutes into a 90-minute speech and trails a slow burn And at the end the hr person was furious with me and made me give back some money and just berated me wow That's and it was it was my fault Because it wasn't a good fit.

Yeah,

You weren't it wasn't I got winded by success.

It was not an alignment.

Yes our Communication and skill sets did not match.

We were not the right fit.

Yeah,

I insisted we were because I wanted the money Lesson learned So I say no to things now that aren't a good fit for me I get a lot of opportunities that come my way I say no to more things now than I say yes to Them as well as myself,

You know,

It's been a big lesson for me You know,

It's been a big lesson in my life too is to basically when i'm faced with a decision because a lot of times,

You know,

We We have these these conflicts right internal conferences.

Like should I do it?

Should I not do it?

And i've learned to you know,

It's a practice obviously,

But i've learned to when i'm feel that that fork in the road To say wait a minute,

You know,

Is this my heart wants to do this or is it my head my head being?

Logic survival scarcity ego importance money success,

You know,

Like all these like things that are external Versus do I really like do I really want to do like in if I didn't if it wasn't about the money if I had You know,

Let's say a ton of money Would I still do this if the answer is no then why am I doing it now?

You know,

So why you know,

Do I really need to do it?

Do I have to do it?

You know and most of the time the answer is no so but we say yes because oh well,

You know It'd be good to it's a logical it's the right choice.

I can get some money and save it and you know quote-unquote right choice,

You know,

So Well what happened with me so many times I would say yes to everything and then order actually get mad at the person That I said yes to what all I had to do was say no,

You know,

I I get I get frustrated I get resentful I'd be like well i'm doing all this for you And somebody once said he could have said no.

Yeah.

Well,

I didn't want to let you down and they go Well,

You're kind of letting me down now because all you're doing is complaining Right.

So I said,

Okay,

You know fair enough finish the work and didn't complain anymore because it was wrong for me to complain anyway But that's when I started to learn the whole honor yourself thing.

It's okay to say no You don't even have to give a reason why I usually do either.

It's not a good fit or my schedule is too busy or Whatever but you have to honor yourself enough to just stay focused on the things that are going to bring you to a better place Or are people you really want to work with?

And you know,

It's important when you do that it's so freeing When you when you just say no and you can feel bad because you maybe you thought you let somebody down They're generally going to respect your decision Yeah,

I mean if you're coming from an authentic place I think that's the key and ultimately if they don't respect your identity And ultimately if they don't respect your decision,

Then it was that's even more proof that it wasn't aligned for you.

Anyway,

Yeah exactly So anyway cool my friend.

Hey,

What's the name of your vision program?

And then like I said,

We'll have a link for that in the show notes for this for this episode So check the website,

But yeah,

It's called uh engaging your why?

Vision board mastery.

It's kind of got a dual name over the years It's morphed into one of the other and the uh,

The website link that that they'll be sharing.

There's also a free master class a webinar on there so that if people want to know a little bit more about the basics and Bring a pen and paper to that pen paper heart and mind to that We share so much information just in that and if that helps you to get on your journey Great,

If it if it dispels some myths excellent if you want to continue to invest in yourself There's a couple options there and a couple of them are just a couple of dollars these little mini crash course things There were so much fun to create they just were yeah,

I think when I was like three or four bucks or something So yeah three dollars and sixty five cents and I laughed at the amount when Again,

One of my team suggested that one cent for every day of the year or what?

That's what he said.

He goes people will be like wow that's clever and funny and all of a sudden people start investing in it and Even in the little video that talks about it.

It says the skills you learn here can help you every single day of the year And that's why it's that weird price and no i'm not going to mark it up a penny during leap year It's just going to stay nice Yep,

Cool buddy.

I have one more question for you.

What are you grateful for right now today?

Uh,

Well First thing getting written in tomorrow's gratitude journal is the fact that we had this conversation Nice,

No because it's something that made my day Um other things i'm grateful for i'm grateful that I finished this weekend.

My muscles are killing me Trimming back the trees and bushes that were starting to ruin our fence in the backyard Oh,

Wow,

It was a huge job and I knew if I started it and got distracted I would never finish And I finished it was over a hundred feet length of fencing And cleared it all out and the brush chipper broke So I I had to carve a path into the woods to dump all the brush in a big pile in the woods But I got it done and actually I wrote that in this morning's gratitude journal I'm happy I stayed focused enough put the phone down turned off facebook and just hit it hard all weekend and did no live streaming while you're Oh gosh,

No No,

I was probably cursing too much and my legs and arms are all cut up from brush and branches smacking me in the I Took one in the eye,

But it didn't do any damage.

But you know,

You take your time and you're like,

Oh,

Yeah I'm gonna do any damage,

But you know,

You take your safety glasses off for five minutes.

That's when a branch snaps your eyeball It'll find you but yeah,

That was another thing i'm grateful for I can still see It's amazing,

Isn't it?

You know,

You see people every day it's like We get caught up with our little minute problems that we have and then there's always guaranteed always somebody out there That's having a worse day than you In every aspect so yeah,

There's a lot of times i'll drive past a funeral and i'll say well I'm having a better day than everybody there.

So yep,

Maybe I should stop if I was kind of down that day Maybe I should just stop feeling sorry for myself and go do something nice for somebody or go to the grocery store parking lot if you see a carriage block in a spot bring it back to the store or back to the Yeah,

Wow,

You know,

I call that shopping cart rodeo And it makes me laugh and anytime I see somebody just about done putting their groceries Especially if it's a maybe a senior or maybe a mom who's already put their kid in the car and they they're nervous about walking Away from the car from a distance.

I'll say excuse me.

Would you like to bring that carriage back for you?

And they just light up And it's simple you're going in the store anyway Because then when you get to the store if you see somebody else going,

Excuse me You need a carriage the uh wheels hardly wobble and the hand grips warmed up.

You'll love it Has never been with you it flips the day it flips your day and yeah,

You flip,

You know,

I've had people look at me and they go You're kind of weird,

But I trust you in a strange way I'll take a carriage and then you know,

They push forward I go see that wheels hardly wobble No,

And they look back they're smiling laughing.

I don't know where their day was all I know is I feel better because A little act of kindness and some humor Got me through it.

No,

Not everybody's comfortable talking to strangers i'll talk anywhere to anybody pretty much but it's those little moments that get me back on track if i'm Veering or maybe a little down or in a funk or something like that Love it,

Man.

Thank you so much for this conversation.

This was awesome.

Thank you.

I was honored to be part of it Yeah,

We'll have to do it again sometime.

I would love to My dear friend author speaker motivator steve gamlin.

It's been a pleasure,

Dude Thank you very much All right,

So check the episode link guys on the website.

We will get get you a hold of that awesome vision board program And i'll see you next time All right guys,

I hope you enjoyed that episode with my friend steve gamlin He's an author motivational speaker helping people actualize their vision through his weekly motivational firewood You can learn more at moto www.

Motivationalfirewood.

Com Or check him out on social media at steve gamlin You know vision is such a crucial part of living a transformed and dynamic life.

I know in my own life It's been a continual journey to articulate who I am and what i'm doing and why i'm doing it to me Vision is central to having confidence success and most of all fulfillment in life If you enjoyed this episode make sure you subscribe on any channel you listen to and share it with at least one friend who you believe Will benefit from today's episode.

You can also tag me on social media at tutor tutor alexander official And let me know your thoughts on today's episode,

Please I love getting feedback and my goal is to bring you as much value as possible in the time that we share Don't forget also about steve's vision board mastery program It's an amazing and fun powerful tool to help you on your own path to creating a vision If you're struggling with finding a purpose articulating your why or simply being organized in the pursuit of your goals This program will help you get empowered to take massive action towards your dreams The link to the program will be in the show notes for this episode.

Just check www.

Danceoflife.

Com www.

Danceoflife.

Com episode 141 And finally remember our quote for today Don't let others tell you what you can't do Don't let the limitations of others limit your vision if you can remove your self-doubt and believe in yourself You can achieve what you never thought possible.

That's by roy t bennett from the light in the heart I hope you've enjoyed this episode as always.

Thank you for listening.

I love you guys and remember life is a dance Now go out there and dance it well Dance of life.

Com

Reviews

What a great and inspiring episode! Thanks Tudor, as always a pleasure. Much love 💜x