So today we're talking about CPTSD versus PTSD,
Which is the beautiful design that never stopped working.
Today,
I want to reframe something for you that I know weighs on so many of you.
I know it weighed on me.
We're going to talk about the difference between PTSD and complex PTSD.
And I want to do it in a way that you may have never heard before.
Now,
When I started thinking about CPTSD this way,
It really shifted me.
And I don't want to just define these terms for you.
I want you to walk away understanding that what you call your symptoms actually are evidence of a brilliant design that is still doing its job.
And quickly,
Before we begin,
This conversation is totally educational.
If you believe that you're living with PTSD or see PTSD,
Working with a trauma-informed therapist is a beautiful act of self-care and self-love,
And you are deserving of it.
So consider this peer-to-peer educational support.
So let's talk with,
Let's start with talking about the difference.
PTSD is typically,
This arises from a single overwhelming event or a cluster of events.
For example,
A car accident or,
God forbid,
An assault or a disaster.
The nervous system takes a snapshot of that moment and keeps replaying it because it's trying to protect you from it ever happening again.
But conflicts trauma is different.
CPTSD arises from prolonged prolonged,
Repeated relational trauma,
Especially in childhood.
Especially when the danger came from the very people that we depended upon for survival.
So PTSD says something terrible happened to me.
CPTSD says something terrible keeps happening and there's no way to escape.
And I had to grow around it.
I had to adapt to it.
And here's the reframe I want you to sit with.
If PTSD is a snapshot.
See PTSD.
Is an architecture.
Your entire developing self was built inside a storm.
So the symptoms of CPTSD are then not malfunctions.
They are load-bearing walls.
Let me show you three that are so often misunderstood,
Three signs that are often misunderstood.
The first is the emotional flashback.
With PTSD,
Flashbacks are often visual,
A scene replaying.
But with CPTSD,
You flash back into a feeling with no picture attached to it.
Suddenly you're drowning in shame just boom out of nowhere or you're you're drowning in dread or you You shrink into smallness and you have no idea why?
Then you start to think,
What's wrong with me?
I must be overreacting.
But nothing is wrong with you.
Amy,
The amygdala,
Stored the emotional temperature of your childhood but the timestamps went offline.
Because you were too young to file the memories with words.
When Amy recognizes that the temperature today or the emotional temperature of the room today Similar to what you experienced in the past she floods with the original feelings.
That's not you being broken That's a warning system built into you.
That's so devoted that it never takes a day off Now,
The second is the inner critic,
Oy vey.
So many of you live with a relentless voice that attacks you from the inside.
But if you listen closely.
That voice was born.
As sort of a bodyguard.
A child in a home where criticism or rage or rejection can strike at any moment learns to criticize herself or himself first.
If I attack me before they do,
I can soften the blow.
If I find my flaws first,
I can fix them before they cost me love.
Your inner critic is not self-hatred,
Dear one.
It is a child security detail that never got told that they can stop.
They never learned that the war ended.
What you learned in childhood into adulthood.
The third is toxic shame and the fear of actually being seen.
With single event PTSD,
The sense of self often stays intact.
With CPTSD.
The trauma was happening while the self was being formed.
So the child concludes,
The problem must be me.
And that shame,
As painful as it is,
Was functional.
Because believing that I am the bad one kept the hope alive that if I could figure out a way to become good,
They would love me.
Blaming yourself was actually safer.
Than facing that the people who were supposed to protect you weren't and couldn't.
So this is actually an internal survival mechanism that we're just misunderstanding.
Research suggests that prolonged childhood stress shapes the nervous system to default to survival states,
Fight,
Flight,
Freeze,
And fawn,
Rather than rest and connection.
Your actual survival baseline,
Your nervous system,
Was calibrated in a war zone.
Your system then keeps scanning for a threat.
That may not even be there anymore.
It's not defective.
It's just exquisitely calibrated for a world that you no longer live in.
So here's your one takeaway practice.
I really hope that this lands.
And it's a phrase.
I want you to use it every single time that you sense a symptom coming up.
You place your hand on your heart.
You say,
Thank you for protecting me.
I am safe now.
That's it.
You can only relieve.
You're in a critic of her duty with complete gratitude and give them the sense that they're just not needed anymore.
So every time you thank the design instead of fighting it,
You teach your nervous system The war is over and I'm not three years old anymore.
Now this doesn't happen overnight.
It takes tons and tons of practice.
And this is how we slowly break free of the autonomic,
Automatic CPTSD responses.
We become aware of them.
We live above the veil of them.
We stabilize our awareness,
And we speak to our nervous system.
I am safe now.
I'm no longer three years old.
Thank you for protecting me.
That's it,
A daily practice that I hope that you incorporate into your daily life.
Each and every day,
Even if you're not experiencing symptoms,
Because teaching your nervous system that you are safe and you're not three years old anymore They missed that memo.
And it's never too late to reprogram your subconscious mind or heal your nervous system.
I so hope that this has been helpful.
Until next time.
