Independent Love

This is a live talk I gave earlier this year about Independent Love/Self Love and different concepts to better understand self love, self trust and having a relationship with yourself. I hope you enjoy, let me know what you think in the comments! Much love & Namaste to you all!

Transcript

Hey,

What's going on?

How's everyone doing?

Just jumping in for a little,

I guess a New Year's video.

I'm just happy New Year's to all you guys.

Definitely.

I actually just want to jump in and like I was talking,

They were thinking about this topic tonight,

Which was love independence.

And I don't know,

It was a couple weeks,

It was like a week ago.

I like came across in my mind.

So I figured I needed to,

You know,

Just share it.

I felt it was definitely something that other people might want to hear.

So you know,

It's basically,

Basically about,

You know,

Like,

You know,

A lot of people talk about love independence or financial independence.

So you know,

Like be you want to be make sure to have,

You know,

Your own money and you know,

Your own things in a way so that when you get into a relationship with someone else,

You're not needing that from them,

Like needing them to take care of you financially or siphoning their wealth off or their stability so that you could be stable,

You know,

Because really that's what's going on.

That's kind of what happens,

You know,

So,

You know,

It doesn't happen in all scenarios,

But it's,

You know,

It's usually best to,

To,

You know,

Have your own stability so that,

You know,

You're not so that you can give,

You know,

That I think the other part too is so that when you have your own foundation and stability,

Whether it be financial or love or whatever it may be,

When you're in the place of stability,

Then you can give freely and then it's not,

You know,

In a needy kind of way without the expectation of something in return kind of thing.

So,

You know,

I think that's really what it boils down to is though,

Is the being in a way of,

You know,

Like you are financially,

You want to have your own kind of love just like,

You know,

You would your own money,

Your own self-love is what I mean.

So that a way you're not seeking someone else to fulfill you,

Someone else to feel loved because you should feel loved without the need of someone else's,

You know,

Love really,

You know,

I mean,

In general,

But I had a couple of notes.

I want to pull it up real quick,

But yeah,

I mean,

You know,

And not only that,

But love has much greater value than,

You know,

Currency would ever,

You know,

So if you see love is like,

You know,

An energy or a currency in a way,

Not that it is a currency,

But if you were to compare it,

You know,

It's a finite resource,

You know,

You don't have an infinite love to give,

You do to an extent,

But like not if someone's treating you wrong,

You know,

And those kinds of things,

And you're giving your love to the wrong people,

You know,

Sometimes you want to reevaluate,

You know,

That how much you're giving or what,

You know,

What maybe,

You know,

You need to save somebody,

Especially if you're emptying yourself and you have no,

No love leftover for yourself,

You know,

And then,

And then you're,

You know,

You're down and out and,

You know,

And usually left alone.

So you're the only one that's going to take care of yourself when,

You know,

Usually when you're in that place.

So you definitely want to save,

Save some for yourself,

You know,

That's,

That's I think key.

You also,

You want to love yourself enough to where you're not depending on someone else to love you or having the expectation of it,

Because that's what that can change love towards not freely flowing or given.

Yeah.

And really,

Yeah,

Because when you want someone has that expectation of it,

Then,

Then it changes things,

You know,

Then it's not,

Love isn't then freely given.

It's a,

It's,

It's a,

An agreement,

You know,

It's like a contractual thing,

You know,

And that's not really how love should be.

Love should be free flowing and freely given when it,

When,

You know,

That person deems it necessary kind of thing,

I guess,

You know,

At least,

At least how I perceive it.

But or I think,

You know,

How most,

Most would perceive it.

And I love should never be an expectation.

I think that's the other thing,

You know,

Kind of what we were just talking about,

But it shouldn't be expected,

You know,

If anything,

You should be giving it and then if you get it in return,

Then awesome.

But if not,

Then that should be okay,

Too.

You know,

I mean,

You should,

You know,

It is definitely,

It's hard to learn,

Especially if,

You know,

If you're not a person accustomed to that kind of lifestyle,

You know,

Any changing anything greatly can be difficult,

But it just takes practice and dedication,

That kind of stuff.

You want to be full of love so you can give love fully to the other person.

You know,

That,

You know,

That way again,

Like the cup,

I guess the cup,

You know,

Being empty kind of analogy,

You know,

Like if your cup's full,

Then you don't need that other person to fill you up.

You already,

You know,

You're already full.

You want to then give to the other person or others,

You know,

To help,

Not that you're filling them up either,

But it's,

You know,

To keep everyone,

I guess,

From being empty,

You know,

Because sometimes there will be those times where they run empty because of something else that happened in their life,

You know,

Like job or whatever.

So you're then help to,

You know,

Remind them,

I guess,

Of their love of their self or why,

You know,

Why it is good to love yourself or why they're a valuable person.

You know,

It's good to be reminded of that as well,

You know,

To an extent from others.

But you shouldn't be depending on it.

You know,

I think that's the key.

Yeah,

If you're empty,

Then you're going to expect them or want the other person to fill you up,

Which,

And give you love,

Which in return will drain them.

So yeah,

I mean,

You know,

That's the other part,

You know,

You don't want to be,

Because if you're empty or don't have enough self-love yourself,

Then you're just going to be running to whoever is going to,

Who is going to just make you feel like you're loved.

And really though,

That doesn't just because you just because you think you're loved doesn't mean you are loved and doesn't mean you're going to feel loved either.

I think that's the other thing too,

Is we seek these things externally or outside of us that we think are going to make us feel loved or make us feel better.

And in reality,

They,

You know,

They don't,

They leave us feeling the same or sometimes even worse,

You know,

Depending upon what it is that we choose.

But I wanted to also say it's all about balance and not giving up the love you have for yourself to others,

You know,

Like in a way of,

You know,

Just making sure you take care of yourself,

Like,

You know,

Not,

Not sacrificing your sanity or your love,

You know,

That you build for yourself and self-respect,

You know,

Your self-trust,

You know,

All those things,

You know,

Things that you would give to someone else,

You need to be giving those things to yourself,

You know,

If you're not,

Then,

You know,

It's going to,

It is going to cause problems.

I was still trying to,

You know,

Piece that together in my life,

But,

You know,

And gotten a lot better hold on it,

You know,

And that's kind of why I haven't been doing videos and stuff much.

I've been doing a lot of live stuff,

But I'm actually on that note going to be taking a,

You know,

Short little break,

Probably from Facebook,

You know,

Like social media and stuff for a little while,

Just to focus on spiritual growth,

You know,

Without distractions,

You know,

Should be focused for a little while and then see where that goes.

Yeah,

I thank you guys for checking it out and jumping in,

Probably be AWOL from some social media for a little bit,

Just to,

You know,

Recoup,

Re-energize,

You know,

All that good stuff and,

You know,

See where things go.

But yeah,

Thank you guys.

You guys have a good night.

You have a good New Year's and,

You know,

Much love and peace to all,

You know,

Namaste.

Reviews

Excellent A+ video👍
L❤VE the Advice
L❤VE the Country Accent!🤭. Off social media too. Don't watch TV either.

These thoughts are so important. I'm glad you're getting them out there!

A great message about love independence, thank you and Namaste.

Thank you for this very valuable reminder at a time when I really needed it 🙏

Beautifully described and explained Cody. I enjoyed listening to it. 👌🥰🥰🥰🥰

Important lesson we all need to remember! Thank you for the message.

Amazing. Self-love is so important yet pretty much completely ignored in the world of Disney-fused love & relationship ideals. It starts from within ❤🙏 Namaste.

Thanks Cody, some really good points 💜x

Love the style of this. The way its set up it's like an old friend talking to me. Alot of this hit home! Thanks for your views it really has helped in a few areas of my life.

This is just “real”! Thank you for sharing and the gentle reminder! 🙏🏼💖

I find myself so often giving love freely to others with no expectations but I can never seem to give it to myself!

Thanks Cody. Well said. Appreciate this message very much right now & I take your words to heart. Thanks again.

This was a great insight to self- love and its indispensability for growth and loving others freely and truly. It’s a great reflection. Thanks much! Namaste 🙏🏻