Hi.
I'm so glad you're here.
In today's practice,
We're going to be using a modality called family constellations.
It's built on a simple,
Kind of radical idea that a lot of what we call our beliefs didn't actually begin with us.
Oftentimes,
These beliefs are survival strategies that were passed down from our ancestors as means to survive.
We often carry these beliefs subconsciously.
Allowing them to rule us and the way we move through the world.
Sometimes they serve us,
And sometimes the program is outdated.
In today's practice,
We're going to find one of these beliefs and get curious about it.
Not to force it out,
But to actually look at it.
We'll bring awareness to where it came from.
Attunement to how it served whoever carried it first.
And acknowledgement of whether it still serves you now.
And then together we'll decide.
Does this one keep moving forward with you?
Or does it get to rest?
Ok,
Let's begin.
Find a place to be still,
Lying down or seated with your spine supported.
Let your eyes close or soften your gaze.
Take a breath in and let it go,
Allowing your exhale to be longer than your inhale.
And again,
In through the nose.
And out slow.
There's nowhere to get to right now.
This is the only place you need to be.
Bring your attention to your body breathing.
Not to fix anything,
Just to notice.
Notice what feelings and sensations are present as you get curious about your current experience.
Allow yourself to fully arrive in your body in this moment.
Let's start by finding the belief itself.
Gently braying your mind.
To a belief you carry that runs underneath your choices,
Your relationships,
Your sense of what's possible for you.
It might sound like I have to earn my rest,
Or I'm too much,
Or love always leaves.
Let it surface without forcing it.
The first one that comes is usually the right one.
Your body is wiser than your thinking mind about this,
So trust whatever comes up first.
Notice where you feel it.
Is this thought,
This belief accompanied by a tightness?
A heaviness.
A bracing somewhere.
When you're ready.
I want you to ask.
Quietly,
Inside.
Whose was this first?
Don't reach for the answer.
That's your mind trying to take over again.
Let it arrive instead.
It might be a parent,
A grandmother you never met,
A whole line of women or men who had no other choice but to believe this in order to survive whatever they were living through.
If an image comes,
A face,
A figure,
Or just a feeling of someone standing beside you,
Let it be there.
You don't have to know their name.
You don't have to get it right.
This isn't a test.
Just noticing who this belief first belonged to is enough.
Now.
Let's understand it,
Instead of judging it.
Ask quietly.
How did this serve you?
Not me.
You.
The one who's standing beside you.
Let yourself imagine.
Even loosely,
What their life required.
Maybe it was a time or place where softness wasn't safe.
Where rest meant falling behind.
Or being too much meant being left.
But this belief wasn't a flaw in them.
It was a solution.
It worked.
It's the reason a piece of your line is still standing here,
Right now,
In you.
Silently say to them.
I see what you carried.
I see why you carried it.
It kept you alive.
Pause here.
Let that land.
This is attunement.
Not agreeing with the belief.
Just understanding what it was for.
Now.
Bring it into the present.
Ask yourself honestly.
Does this still serve me the way it served them?
Notice what comes.
You might feel it clear now.
You might feel some loyalty to it,
Some fear of what happens without it.
Both are allowed.
This isn't about getting the right answer.
It's about telling the truth,
Just for this moment.
About what this belief is costing you now versus what it's protecting.
And now,
The choice.
You get to decide,
Not force,
But decide whether this one keeps moving forward with you.
Or whether it gets to rest here with the one who carried it first.
If you're ready to let it rest,
Say inside,
I am not required to carry this forward.
Notice what happens in your body when you say that.
There is no correct reaction.
Some part of you might resist.
Might not want to let go yet.
Then that's alright.
Nothing here is being forced.
You're only naming what might be true.
This belief was on loan.
And loans can be returned.
If you're not ready to set it down quite yet,
That's alright too.
You can simply sign.
I see you.
And I'm not done with you yet.
Awareness alone is real progress.
You don't owe this process a resolution today.
And if you are ready.
Imagine physically setting it down.
Visualizing this belief.
As something external to yourself.
Maybe you see it as a bundle on your back.
Maybe it presents as a stone in your hands.
Let it leave your body and return to the ground,
To the lineage,
To be held by something larger than just you.
Not gone,
Not disrespected.
Simply no longer yours to carry alone.
Breathe.
Notice what's left in the space where the belief used to sit.
Or where it's beginning to loosen.
It might feel empty at first.
That's okay.
Empty isn't the same as nothing.
It might already be filling in with something else,
Lightness,
Spaciousness.
A breath that goes a little deeper than the one before.
Stay here for a moment.
When you're ready.
Start to feel your body again.
The surface beneath you.
Wiggle your fingers,
Your toes.
Let yourself come back into the room a little at a time.
Before you open your eyes,
Choose one word for what you're carrying forward instead.
Or one word for where you've landed.
It does not need to be profound.
Hold that word gently as you come back into your day,
Your life.
A little more awake to what's yours and what was only ever on loan.
Thank you for doing this work.
It matters more than you know.
And it doesn't only change you.
It moves backwards and forwards through the whole line.
