How different would your life be?
If you were totally free.
Of other people's judgments.
The other day I was working on some ideas for Insight Timer and.
.
.
I realized that some of the things I was coming up with were being influenced by a little voice in my head.
And it's a little voice that I think lives in a lot of our heads.
It's the one that tells us will be judged.
That others might not like something we do.
That we might look stupid.
Or even that we might be disliked.
And for each of us,
That voice is.
A creation,
A combination of many things like our upbringing,
Our education.
Of parents.
Religious backgrounds and the coaches we grow up in.
And I don't consider myself to be someone who cares very much what people think of me,
But.
.
.
I'm clearly not totally immune to it.
It still affects me whether.
.
.
On a conscious or a subconscious level.
And all of this,
It got me thinking about.
.
.
What would my life look like?
What would my day-to-day look like if I knew for.
.
.
An absolute fact.
That nobody was judging me.
I realize I probably have a lot more fun for a start.
For example,
Sometimes I get the urge to sing.
Loudly to myself in the street.
Sometimes I want to wear clothes that might look a bit silly or.
.
.
Mismatched Sometimes I want to strike up a conversation with a complete stranger.
Or just spend a day doing absolutely nothing.
That little voice.
The judge.
Can get in the way.
So I'd like to ask you the same question.
What would your life look like?
What would your day-to-day look like?
You were free from judgment,
If you knew with absolute certainty that Nobody was judging you.
Maybe take some time just to make a list.
On some paper or your phone,
It doesn't really matter.
And really think about the things that you don't do,
The things you avoid or.
.
.
The behaviours you modify because of this idea that.
.
.
People will have an opinion about it,
That society will have an opinion about it.
And some of these things might be really small.
Like dressing how you'd really like to dress or going outside without.
Looking your best.
Other things might be bigger.
Like saying no to people more.
Changing careers to something.
.
.
It's perhaps less well paid,
But more fulfilling.
Or removing people from your life.
Might not have your best interest at heart,
But.
.
.
Expect you to have this.
The question is essentially.
.
.
How much of what you do is actually driven by what you want?
And how much is driven by what you imagine other people might think.
Maybe think about the last time you wanted to say something but you held back.
Or you wanted to wear something but decided against it,
Or.
.
.
You felt an urge to do something spontaneous.
Only to talk yourself out of it.
Or stopped you.
Was there a genuine reason not to do it?
Or is it the possibility that someone might see you?
Someone might form an opinion or think less of you.
And how often do we do this?
Without even recognizing it.
The most interesting thing to me is that We often don't actually know what other people think of us.
We don't have a right to.
It's not our business.
But we still imagine their reactions,
We anticipate their judgments.
And then we change our behavior.
In response to something.
That might not even exist.
A couple of weekends ago I wanted to go on I wanted to have one of those days where you do Absolutely nothing.
You don't even get dressed.
And I love those days every once in a while.
They're good for me,
But.
.
.
I also noticed the guilt.
That came with that.
You shouldn't be doing nothing.
To be productive.
Or a waste of a day.
None of this was really related to a specific person.
Just my conditioning,
The things I've been.
.
.
Told a correct to do.
And yet it felt like a real person was watching and judging that.
And for what it's worth,
I took that lazy day.
It was great.
So here's a little experiment I'd like you to try over the next few days.
Pay attention to those moments.
When you feel yourself holding back.
Notice when you change what you say,
What you do.
How you present yourself because of what someone might think.
You don't need to judge yourself for it.
Just notice it.
And try doing that thing anyway.
You might discover.
That you're giving an awful lot of power.
To judgment step.
Don't even exist.
