Before you reach for something,
To quiet what you feel,
Pause just for a moment.
Because which you are trying to numb.
May not be your enemy.
It may be your soul asking to be heard.
Tonight we are not escaping.
We are returning.
Welcome,
Beautiful soul.
Find a comfortable position.
You don't need to force anything.
Gently inhale through your nose.
And exhale slowly.
Deep inhale.
And a soft exhale.
Let your body begin to settle Let your shoulders drop Let your jaws open There is nothing you need to perform here.
Nothing you need to hide.
God already sees you fully.
And still he stays.
If you've been using alcohol.
Or substances.
Or distractions to soften the edges of your pain.
You are not weak.
You are overwhelmed.
Your nervous system.
He's been trying to survive But survival is not the same as peace.
And numbing is not healing.
It only postpones what is ready to be released.
There is a quiet wisdom.
That has always been here.
Do not get drunk on wine.
Which lead to debauchery.
Instead,
Be filled with the Spirit.
Ephesians 5 18 not filled with escape.
But filled with Spirit.
Not emptied through substances.
But filled with presence.
Because what you are truly seeking is not the drink,
It is relief.
It is peace.
It is safety.
And maybe you don't want to hear your own thoughts right now.
Maybe they feel too loud.
Too honest.
Too heavy.
Maybe there are things inside you.
You don't want to face yet.
Hardships.
Truths.
Feelings that don't have easy answers.
So you reach for something that softens the edges.
Something that quiets the noise just for a moment.
And there is no judgment here.
Because yes,
It does bring a kind of relief.
Temporary,
Gentle at first,
But only for a moment And then.
.
.
Their body pays.
Their mind fogs.
The heart.
Feels it even deeper.
Because what is avoided is not healed.
It waits patiently until you are ready to return.
And the truth is you are not meant to live trapped inside your mind.
Endlessly thinking Overprocessing relieve in pain.
The way out is not more thinking.
The way out is within.
Within your breath.
Within your body.
Within the quiet space where God already is.
When you begin to turn your attention away from the spiral of your thoughts.
And toward him.
Something shifts.
Not because the pain disappears instantly.
Because you are no longer holding it along.
Think of him.
Even little more.
Then you think of your own pain.
Gently.
Without force.
And notice.
How somethings opens how your breath deepens.
How your chest loosens This is the relief.
You were searching for not nounded.
But held not escaped.
But transformed.
You don't have to run anymore.
You can stay and be carried.
Bring your attention gently to your body.
Notice your chest.
Your breath.
Your body has been caring so much.
Every time you numbed,
Your body didn't disappear.
Eight weighted.
Your liver,
Your cells.
Your nervous system.
They have been working to bring you back to balance.
Even now.
Your body is repairing Inhale slowly.
And as you exhale,
Imagine.
Releasing the need to escape.
You don't shame the part of you that reached for relief.
You thank it.
It tried to help you.
With the tools it knew.
But now.
.
.
You are learning a new way.
A deeper way.
Away.
That does not abandon yourself.
Feel okay.
You are not your habits.
You are not your coping mechanism.
You are not the night.
You wish you could undo.
You are becoming aware.
And awareness is the beginning of freedom.
Your spirit.
Is getting stronger.
Now you're smarter.
Your soul is wiser.
And you are evolving You are not who you were when you first needed to know.
Your awareness has changed.
Your consciousness has changed.
Even if right now you feel tired.
Crest or depleted,
You have evolved God.
Is not waiting for you to be perfect.
He is meeting you right here.
In the middle of your becoming.
You don't need to escape to be held.
You are already found.
Let his presence fill what you once tried to silence.
Gently bring your awareness back to your breath.
Inhale slowly.
And exhale.
And say quietly within.
I no longer abandon myself to feel okay I return to God I return to truth.
I return to myself.
You're not losing something.
You are reclaiming yourself.
And this is where the healing begins.
