What Mental Health Isn't

Glen shares why mental health is not a destination or the absence of problems, but an ongoing process of meeting life's challenges, coping and learning from them. She speaks honestly about her own difficult experiences and challenges the idea that anyone who seems to cope well must have no struggles. It is for anyone who has judged themselves or others for having problems, and it is a reminder to carry a little compassion because you never know what someone else is going through. This content is educational and is not a substitute for one to one professional care.

Transcript

Today, I wanted to come to you. And talk to you about mental health. Yet, I still think we have a real confused view of what mental health is. Mental health. Is not a destination. Mental health. Is a process. Mental health is the process of change. Meeting Life's Challenges. Coping effectively. Learning from that and moving forward. It seems to me that in popular media and on social media and even conversations with individuals, The idea of mental health is that there are no problems. The idea of mental health is that there's no anxiety. That person doesn't have anxiety. That person doesn't get depressed. That person doesn't experience stress. That is so false. That is so false. And I will tell you on a personal level, People, Some people I know and Love. Accused me of being perfect. They accuse me of not understanding what other people go through because I don't. Impose. My issues on other people. Cry randomly. I don't even complain a lot about things that are not working in my life. And trust me, There are a lot of things that don't work. I'm divorced for heaven's sake. My twin girls were stillborn. Okay, So. To say that I don't experience any kind of mental health issues is ridiculous. Unrealistic and quite frankly unfair. It strips me of my humanity. And don't we have enough of that going on in today's world where we strip each other of their humanity because they're not fitting in this little narrow view. Come on! Mental health is not the absence of problems. Mental health is about how you cope. With problems. Life. Is challenging. Life throws us curveballs. Often. A lot of things work out for us and a lot of things don't. It's not so much. It's not as much what happens to us as how we respond to it. How do we meet those challenges? How do we cope with it? So the work I do with clients in mental health focuses on teaching them coping skills on how to meet life's challenges and still be able to smile. And rest and digest properly when you are experiencing stress and anxiety and or depression. It's not mental health, It's not the absence of issues. It's how you deal with them. It's also about how aligned you are with reality. Are your expectations of other people realistic? Are you hoping for something that. . . Is impossible, Highly improbable, And you get disappointed, You get angry, You get defeated every time that doesn't work out, Which it likely won't because it's unrealistic. So how aligned are you with reality? How effectively do you cope with life's issues? With losing a job, With not getting the promotion you wanted, With not having the partner you want, Or with having a relationship fail. How do you cope with overspending and running short this month? On money to pay for your living expenses. Do you stress out? Do you yell at people? Are you abusive? Are you manipulative? Do you steal? Okay? Do you understand what I'm saying here? Mental health is not the absence of problems. I have problems. I have bad things happen. I have unpleasant, Unloving things happen in my life, Too. Because I don't come on here and cry or because I don't call up and whine every time I talk to somebody, That doesn't mean. I'm 100% mentally healthy all the time. That doesn't mean any. One in the mental health space, Any professional in the mental health space. It has an absence of problems. No, We have issues too. We just know how to. Deal with them maybe more effectively than just a regular person. And so that is my role. That's how I see my role in mental health is to help people gain those skills so they can effectively cope with life's challenges and the problems that they face. And by cope effectively, I mean. Handle them. Acknowledge them, Handle them. And still be able to experience joy. Okay? Mental health is not the absence of problems. I don't know how to say it any more clearly than that. And to judge people because they don't show you their stuff all the time is wrong. And it's dehumanizing. You never know what other people are going through. So carry a little bit of compassion. In your pocket, In your wallet, In your purse. In your mind and your heart. And that's it. Just don't expect other people to have it all and and let me just say here that that's another problem with social media with the the false images that are presented is that you know society especially the young people, Are looking at how other people present how they live as if everything is just fine and dandy and they have all the money in the world, They have all the free time in the world, They have all the fun in the world. And they don't show. The realistic side of life. So we start to buy into that. Those people have no problems. And that's wrong. Everybody faces challenges. Every human being on this planet faces challenges. We just deal with them differently. So don't assume. Don't judge a book by its cover. And assume that because you don't see someone's pain. That means they're not in pain. It's not true. Mental health is not the absence of problems. Mental health is about how you process life's challenges, How you cope with those challenges, How you recover, How resilient you are when you are facing challenges and difficulties and pain and trauma. Can you do it in such a way where you can navigate through those challenges, Grow through those challenges, And still experience joy, Still be able to smile and laugh authentically with the people you love, With your inner circle? Where do you measure your mental health based on what I just shared with you? I hope it's. . . I hope you have a high level of mental health. I hope you understand that just because. Problem comes along, It doesn't mean something's wrong with you, That you're weak, That you're unlovable, That you're unworthy. It's life. It's part of the human condition. How do you respond? Is the question. Okay, My rant is over. I just I had to get that off my chest. It's been on my mind for a while. And at this time, I'm going through an exception hook challenge that I don't want to deal with because it is very, Very painful to me. Yet I'm doing the best I can to get through it until I can get to a place where I can find some peace with it. And I need. . . I needed to share that. Mental health is not a destination. It is a process. I hope this was helpful.