Welcome.
If you've found this track,
You're probably somewhere in the middle of the two week wait.
Maybe it's Day 2?
Maybe it's Day 11?
Maybe you've stopped counting,
Or maybe counting is all you can do.
You might have noticed yourself checking for symptoms,
Reading the same forum threads again,
Bargaining with your body,
Trying to interpret every twinge,
Every wave of tiredness,
Every nothing at all.
That's not weakness,
That's a mind trying to protect you in a situation where there is nothing left to do.
You've done everything.
The appointments,
The injections,
The waiting rooms,
The hoping.
And now,
The hardest part.
The part where your only job is to wait.
So for the next few minutes,
I'd like to offer you a different job.
One your body actually knows how to do.
Just breathing.
Nothing to check.
Nothing to interpret.
Nothing to get right.
Find a position where your body feels supported.
Lying down is perfect.
Let your hands rest somewhere comfortable.
On your belly,
By your sides,
Wherever they land.
And when you're ready.
Let your eyes close.
Let's begin by simply noticing your breath without changing anything yet.
Notice where it moves.
Chest,
Ribs,
Belly.
For this whole practice,
We'll breathe through the nose.
In through the nose and out through the nose.
Nasal breathing is quieter,
Slower,
And it tells your body more clearly than anything else we are safe enough to rest.
If your nose is a little blocked,
Don't worry.
It often opens as you slow down.
Just do your best,
Gem.
Now we're going to lengthen the exhale.
The exhale is where your nervous system hears the message,
You can stand down now.
Let's try breathing in for four and out for six.
In 3,
2.
Breathe in,
2,
3,
4.
Two,
Three,
Four,
Five,
Six,
Keep going.
If the count's not quite right,
It doesn't matter.
With every exhale,
Long exhale,
You trigger your vagus nerve,
Which is like pumping the brakes on your heart.
Your heart rate slows down.
You and your mind feel safe.
With every exhale,
The muscles around your eyes,
Your jaw,
Your shoulders get permission to soften.
That's good.
Just like that.
As you keep this gentle nasal rhythm going,
I want to offer you one idea.
You don't have to believe it.
Just let it sit beside you.
Your body has two modes.
Fight or flight.
The mode of checking,
Scanning,
Bracing.
And rest and digest the mode of repairing,
Nourishing,
Receiving.
The two-week wait.
Pulls you forward towards fight or flight.
Of course it does.
That every slow nasal exhale you take gently switches you back the other way into rest and digest.
Into the state where your body does its best work.
And that's what this recording is for.
Not just for today,
But every day of these two weeks.
Each time you press play,
You've chosen to spend a little more time in the wait,
In rest and digest,
And a little less in fight or flight.
Because right now,
Inside you,
Your body is doing a lot in the background,
Quietly,
Competently,
Without instruction.
It does not need your supervision.
It does not need you to monitor it,
Or worry it into working,
Or hold your breath until you know.
What it's asking of you is much simpler.
Kindness,
Gentleness,
Rest.
The checking,
The wondering,
The symptom spotting.
None of it changes the outcome.
But resting,
Breathing,
Softening.
That is you being kind to a body that is working so hard for you.
So your only job right now,
Truly your only job,
Is to rest.
Let the weight be held by your breath,
The nasal breath,
Instead of your breath being held by the weight.
Now we'll settle into the heart of this practice.
Slow,
Even,
Rhythmic breathing.
All in through the nose.
In for four.
Out for six.
I'll guide you gently,
Then leave more and more space so the rhythm becomes yours.
In 3,
2,
1.
Breathe in 2,
3,
4.
Out 2,
3,
4,
5,
6.
In 2,
3,
4.
Out 2,
3,
4,
5,
6.
If your mind wanders to the test date,
To symptoms,
To what-ifs,
That's completely normal.
Minds wander toward what matters most.
When you notice,
Just come back to the exhale.
The long exhale through the nose.
The exhale is home.
Breathing in through your nose,
Your body receives.
Breathing out through your nose,
You settle a little deeper into rest and digest.
You might silently say,
On the in-breath,
I have done everything I can.
And on the out-breath,
Now I rest.
Breathing in,
I have done everything I can.
Breathing out,
Now I rest.
Feel the weight of your body,
Fully supported,
Nothing to hold up,
Nothing to hold together.
Each exhale a little heavier,
A little softer,
A little more here.
There is nothing to solve tonight.
There is nothing to know tonight.
There is only this breath,
And the next one,
And the quiet,
Capable work happening inside you,
All on its own.
Just breathing.
In a moment,
This track will end,
But your calm doesn't have to.
Let the counting fall away now and let your breath find its own natural rhythm.
Easy,
Unmeasured.
Before you go.
I want you to know this recording is here for you every single day of the week,
Day 3,
Day 8.
The night before the test.
Use it to keep choosing rest and digest over fight or flight,
To keep being kind and gentle to a body that is doing so much in the background.
Come back as many times as you need.
It will always say the same thing,
Because it will always be true.
You've done everything you can.
Your only job now is to rest.
If you're drifting towards sleep,
Let yourself go.
You don't need to hear the end.
And if you're returning to your day,
Take one more slow nasal breath.
Whatever these two wakes hold.
You're allowed to be gentle with yourself.
I'm wishing you calm.
And I'm wishing you well.
