Are You Too Much? How We Learn To Make Ourselves Smaller

Have you ever been told you’re too sensitive, too emotional, too intense, too needy, or simply “too much”? For many of us, those words don’t just hurt in the moment. They connect to something much older. In this talk, we’ll explore how we learn to believe that our feelings, needs, enthusiasm, sensitivity, or way of being are somehow excessive and how that belief can lead us to shrink ourselves, over-monitor our behavior, apologize for our needs, or constantly wonder whether we’re taking up too much space. We’ll also look at why this can be especially powerful for neurodivergent people, while recognizing that this experience can affect anyone. Using an IFS-informed, compassionate lens, we’ll explore the protective parts of us that learned to become smaller in order to stay connected, accepted, or safe. This is an invitation to look at the difference between taking responsibility for how we show up and believing that there is something fundamentally wrong with who we are. Please note that this content is educational and not a substitute for one-to-one professional care.