The Highest Priority

What changes when I choose one highest priority before my habitual reactions take over? A reflection on creating a conscious heart room, spacious enough to hold irritation, anger and disagreement without letting them run the game. Perhaps an open heart isn't a state we have to maintain, but a larger room in which our humanness is allowed to exist.

Transcript

What is the difference between having a highest priority in a situation and having no highest priority. There is a place where that is really easy to see both the benefits of it and also I see that it's easy to keep it because the roles and the setup, The structure is so clear. And that place is of course the yoga room. When you come into the yoga room you have me there, Which is leading the session, Who is really present. There is no disturbing factors. And you don't have to talk to anyone, You can just be on the receiving end. And for me? Am on the giving end. Of course, That is on the surface, Because underneath that, I'm also receiving from you when you come into the yoga room. I receive from you being present there. And you are giving. With your attention. So your highest priority when you come into a yoga class is to Pay attention. To be present. And for me? Is to give and also be present. So even if somebody comes in with a lot of. . . Thinking with a lot of mental activity. And maybe impatience, Maybe even a little bit of resistance. Things that outside of the yoga room would really irritate me, Would push my buttons. Would make me angry or disturbed. They don't disturb me in the yoga room because I'm so. . . I'm so aware of my highest priority, Which is to help. The person coming in. To go out more relaxed. More open. And feeling better, Feeling more in contact with her or himself and life. That is the highest priority. So I don't have any. . . Any space for my own personal meanings or dislikes or likes. It doesn't exist. Because anyone who puts a foot inside my yoga room is willing to receive from my teaching Whatever they come with is part of the process, Is part of the journey. So you see how the highest priority is like an umbrella. It's like a room that is holding everything. As it is. And my work is to bring acceptance into whatever is there. On the other hand, On the outside of the yoga room, Because my life is two parts. It's inside the yoga room and it's outside the yoga room. I noticed that when, For example at home, Or anywhere actually, Where I do not have that highest priority of bringing ease into people's lives, Then my personal ego takes over and I get judgmental, I get upset. I get irritated. And You could say that yes, But that's normal and we need to have places where we can just express ourselves. I am not sure about it because it can be a habit. It can be a habit to let my small, You know, Um. . . Ego driven. Irritations. Become something I do again and again. And if that is dominating my relationships. I do not get what I really long for, Which is connection, Which is meaningful exchanges, And being together with a warm heart. So my question today is like, Is it possible? To have a conscious open heart. With my loved ones. With anyone. In the real world. Can I make that the highest priority of my life? What does that mean? Because if I just say I want to have an open, I prioritize to have an open, Warm heart to everything that happens. That kind of tells me that I can never get angry. I can never get irritated. I can never be judgmental. I have to be in a certain state. I can never dislike anything. I need to like everything. I need to love everything. And I have tried that. That's not possible for me. I'm not that elevated yet. I get irritated. My buttons get pushed. Soap. That's why I say conscious open heart. Because consciousness is neutral. It is not not caring. It's not that kind of neutral. It just is. It's like a huge room. And I like to bring those two things together, Conscious heart, Because heart is very like, It has a lot of, Like I said, A lot of, It's telling me a lot how I should be. But consciousness is open and neutral. So when I combine those two, There's something happening. That I can make the highest priority. That whatever happens in interaction with people I love or people I meet. If I can make the highest priority that I can. I have a conscious heart. That means. . . I am letting things be as they are. Because in this moment they are the way they are. That means I'm stopping to fight it. And I'm not letting my critical mind, Which is a habitual mind, Which can tear down anything in a split of a second. I don't let that part of me run the game. I put a star on the sky. Which is the highest priority is to keep that heart room open. Because that brings me into a state which I really long for. I long to be open. I long to be receptive. To be available. I long for being, Feeling love. Joy. All of those things that belong to the heart. But I need to bring consciousness into it. And so the first step is to allow things to be as they are. And just in that act. I am I'm connecting myself to a lot of resources. It's not the same as being passive. I'm just, It's the opposite. Because being resentful and fighting whatever is there is depleting my resources. And it often brings me into a state which I really don't want to be. And the possibility of me getting what I really want and long for deep inside is minimized. When I'm connected to my resources, I can express myself. And in that room, Like I said, It's neutral. I can be angry. I can even be irritated, But I don't buy into it the way I do. When that room is not there. When I believe everything I say, I believe you are wrong totally, You are a terrible person because you said that or did that. I buy into my own stories. That's not having a conscious heart room open. When that room is open, I can hear myself saying things, But I don't believe them. I can see that that's a personal reaction in that moment. I'm not totally happy. I haven't merged. With what is happening in the room. I'm still also the room. Holding it all. Seeing all the humanness inside of it. So there is much more space, There is much more warmth, And there is more acceptance. I have a teenager coming up in our household, 13 years old next year, And I would like to not make these years to come a fight. Dynamic. So wish me good luck. I will probably make more on this later and give you an update. But for now, I am choosing to prioritize an open, Conscious heart room. When I'm interacting with people in my personal life. Thanks a lot for listening.