When We Feel Unseen

The Rumi quote in this short audio track is "Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." I talk about how so much of being seen is unlearning conditioned beliefs, seeing ourselves, and deconstructing whatever is blocking us from these truths that are already inside of us.

Transcript

Today I wanted to talk about when we feel unseen and the wounds that come with that. And I wanted to start by talking about my favorite quote that's really informed both my personal and professional trajectory of internal growth, Spiritual growth, Meditation, And it's by the Persian poet Rumi. And I'm doing this from memory, But it goes something like this. Yourself that you have built against it. So again, Your task is not to seek for love, Or to be seen, Or to seek for understanding or to seek for belonging or to seek for spirituality. Your task is not to seek for love, But merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. Now, I think sometimes we are conditioned to believe that if we just communicate better, We will be seen. If we say the right thing, Then someone will understand us. And we dig ourselves sometimes into a hole to be seen. And the kicker is that because we want to be accepted and loved and feel a sense of belonging, We will actually inadvertently sacrifice our authenticity, Our values, And who we really are to feel seen. And then we don't feel seen because the person that we're allowing the other person to see is not our true selves. So coming back to that quote, Your task is not to seek for love, But merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. I'm a firm believer that everything that you're looking for is inside of you already, But we have various blocks. And one of the biggest blocks to feeling seen is not seeing ourselves, Is not having a relationship with ourselves, Is trying to water the leaves instead of watering the roots in order to elicit change. When we're watering the leaves, We are trying to get other people to see us and trying to feel differently based on external actions. And there is merit to that. But at the end of the day, We need to water the roots if we want to grow, Not water the leaves. And so all this to say, Is the real work, And I am hesitant to even call it work because I think it's such a privilege and such a joy, Although deeply painful at times, Is to explore our relationship with ourselves before we start to focus on not feeling seen by others. Do we see ourselves? What do we see? What is blocking us from seeing ourselves? What is blocking us from having a healthy relationship with ourselves? Oftentimes it's imposter syndrome, It's shame, Right? It's these things that we hear about and talk about, But until we're deconstructing the barriers between ourselves and our true selves, Our self-love, Self-efficacy, Being seen, Spirituality, Whatever it may be, That internal truth, That internal guiding compass inside of you, That gut feeling, Until we deconstruct barriers to that? We are going to continue seeking externally to feel okay internally, And it will never work. So I'm gonna be releasing tracks and courses. You know, I'm new to Insight Timer as a teacher, But I'm not new as a student, Although I wanna have beginner's mind forever and be a new student forever. But I really think that my task at this point in life is creating tools to help people deconstruct whatever is between them and their truest self, Whatever is between them and that inherent worth that every single person is born with. Like a newborn baby doesn't have to prove their worth. A newborn baby doesn't say, Am I good enough for you to see me? A newborn baby just is. And as we age, We unlearn a lot of that. And I believe that this meditative path, The spiritual path is about unlearning the blocks, Unlearning the barriers, Unlearning the narratives that no longer serve us, But probably did in some protective measure throughout our lives. So I know that was a mouthful. I just said a lot of things, But I want to leave you with this. Your task is not to feel seen. Your task is not to seek being seen by others, But rather to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built or that have been built in you. That block you from seeing yourself. Thanks so much.