Once in a land far away,
Long,
Long ago,
When time was measured on clay tablets wedge by wedge.
What would be more than 4,
000 cuneiform imprints between this moment now and when this story was first told.
History marked by fallen stone and rubble,
Ruined,
Wind-worn landscapes between here and this very far-off moment in time.
But if time folds and it winds and it overlaps and it weaves itself layer upon layer into itself,
Then perhaps we can meet Inanna right now,
In her time.
Through the portal of the past,
As we see her sitting on her throne,
Clad in precious jewels and stones.
Shimmering beneath the midday sun as her servants surround her,
Seeing to her every need,
Holding a giant palm leaf over her to block her from the sun's fierce rays.
Inanna,
Her eyes piercing,
Dark,
Heavy coal lining them,
She wears her makeup like a mask.
She smiles wanly as the day passes,
Her people coming to her for one matter or another.
Her husband,
Muzi,
Sitting nearby,
Bored and eating figs,
Eating one after the other with his fingers.
They have everything they want.
The heavens,
The sky,
The earth itself,
And yet.
.
.
This mask that Inanna wears grows thin and weary.
She can keep herself busy,
Keep order in the cosmos,
Keep the balance between sky and earth.
Make sure the city runs smoothly and that her husband doesn't get too jealous of her other lovers.
But really,
She's only there in body and mind.
Not in spirit.
She smiles,
She answers questions,
She performs her duties without flaws,
The perfect queen,
The perfect ruler,
But.
.
.
There is a deep knowing inside her that doesn't let her be okay with it all.
Well,
She really can't say.
She looks around at her palace,
The lush gardens,
The delicious food she has served for every meal.
And yet,
She feels nothing.
Like a spectre before her,
It shimmers but does not seem real.
And it is only when she has sent her servants away,
Her husband off somewhere else,
That Inanna can truly be alone with her thoughts.
Staring out over the kingdom through the window of her chamber,
She sees it all but.
It means nothing.
And there it is,
That whisper again,
That urge,
That pull.
Telling her.
This is not all she came here for.
It's a strange sensation Inanna feels when she is left alone with her thoughts.
Like there's something stirring from deep within her,
A restless,
Caged animal.
Reeling and banging itself up against the bones of her rib cage.
Fighting to break free.
She sits there,
In her robes of sapphire and emerald green,
Jewels dripping from her fingers and throat.
One hand on her belly.
Her eyes closed.
Listening.
Like a voice from the deep it comes to her.
A call only she can answer.
A scratch only she can itch,
Except she doesn't know how.
And so it festers and then it is too much to sit with.
So she gets up abruptly and pours herself some wine and then aimlessly wanders the palace looking for something to distract her.
Something to take her thoughts from herself.
To take her thoughts from that mysterious voice that doesn't want to leave her alone.
This voice,
She.
.
.
Cannot decipher.
And this is how she lives her days,
Seemingly happy enough,
But always her thoughts are being pulled back to that feeling tugging at her skirts,
Weighing her down,
Whispering in a language she cannot understand.
Until one day.
Word comes to Inanna that her sister is in mourning for the loss of her husband,
Her sister Ereshkigal,
Queen of the Underworld,
Who she hasn't seen or spoken to in years.
For it is her place to rule the realm above the earth,
And her sister's to rule the realm below.
And yet hearing of her loss.
An echo of grief pulses through her own veins and lodges itself deep in her heart,
Catching up the strings of the whispers she has been hearing,
Like a harp being plucked,
Their harmony dissonant and haunting but somehow urgent.
And slowly it dawns on the queen that she must go down to see her sister.
She must be there for her in her time of mourning.
That will be the only thing for it,
The only thing to stop this pain in her heart and this throbbing in her ears as she strains to hear the voices.
She thinks she almost hears her sister calling out to her like a heavy stone pulling her downwards.
She knows she must go,
No matter what anyone says to her.
No matter what the rules.
And so,
Inanna summons her most trusted servant,
Ninchabar,
And tells her she must help prepare her for a very long journey ahead.
Ninchabar asks no questions but helps to bathe her,
Adding the scents of oud and jasmine to perfume her skin,
Drying her tenderly and putting on fine gowns,
Light and best for travel.
A gossamer dress of dark green,
A golden belt cinched around her waist,
Golden couplets in her braided hair,
Jewels around her neck and wrists,
A crown gleaming upon her head,
And a breastplate of emblazoned gold on her chest.
A deep red velvet cloak draped around her shoulders.
Prepared.
To perfection.
A finer queen had never been seen in these lands.
The queen of the heavens and of earth,
Walking,
Gleaming golden like the sun her head held high.
Through the kingdom she goes,
All those who see her bowing their heads,
Lowering their eyes,
As if they were blinded as they would be by the very sun that allows their crops to grow and their reeds to dry.
Ninshibar walks behind her,
Holding up her gown so they do not get dirty.
To the outer walls of the kingdom they go.
And when they get to the road,
Inanna turns to Ninjabar and she speaks.
It is time for you to turn back now,
Sweet Ninjabar,
For I am going to a land that no living soul has ever been to.
I have heard a call to see what I have not yet seen.
To experience what I have not yet experienced,
And to learn what I do not yet know.
My sister is in mourning in the underworld and I must go to her.
And of course,
Ninjabar is shocked to hear this for she knows just as everyone does that no one ever returns from the underworld,
Even a queen such as Inanna.
She is asking for a death sentence and she doesn't even realize it.
I do not return after three days.
Bang the drums,
Tell my people and send for the fathers to bring me back.
They will know what to do,
She says.
Aninchabar drops to her knees and weeps.
She holds on to the skirts of her queen,
Begging her to reconsider.
But Inanna tells her to hush and to go home now.
Her duties are done.
Do not follow me,
Ninjabar.
Remember,
In three days' time,
And with that,
She turns suddenly and begins to walk alone now,
To the edge.
Of her kingdom.
And to the east she goes.
To the mountains,
To the cave of Kutha,
Where the tales have told of the entrance to the underworld.
The land around her barren,
The sun scorching,
Sweat dripping down her back.
Making wet patches in the fabric beneath her arms,
And yet she walks tall and proud,
Unafraid,
For she is a queen of the skies,
A lady of the heavens,
And she knows she has trials ahead she must face,
But it is the time for her to journey beyond what she knows.
To finally follow that voice that's pulling her downwards into those shadows.
And so she reaches the hidden cave and begins her descent down the spiral staircase as the light begins to dim.
The blackness sucking all life from it.
The only sounds she can hear of her own breathing.
And the thumping of her heart in her ears.
The light is so faint.
Her eyes straining,
Until ahead she sees tall pillars of light,
Candles lit before a gate.
Tall and looming over her,
Made of a gleaming,
Dangerous-looking dark marble.
This is the first gate Shuma's passed through.
No one is there.
And so she goes to the gate and pounds on it proudly until the gatekeeper opens it.
His eyes are sunken into his skull,
His pallor gray and sickly.
He looks her up and down and speaks slowly,
Who are you and why have you come?
She answers.
My name is Inanna,
Queen of Heaven and Earth.
I have come to see what I have not yet seen,
To experience what I have not yet experienced,
And to learn what I do not yet know.
I am here to see my sister Ereshkigal and be with her in her time of sorrow.
The gate slams shut and she waits in the cold.
For the first time noticing the walls of this cave around her,
The drip of water.
The echo of strange,
Unearthly sounds.
She shivers and wraps her cloak more tightly around her.
Until the gate is flung open and the gatekeeper comes out once more,
We have spoken to your sister,
And you may enter through seven gates to see her.
This is the first.
In order to pass,
We ask that you give us the golden crown upon your head.
Inanna hesitates,
But then she shrugs,
Takes it off,
And hands it to him.
He disappears and she walks through the first gate.
Into what feels like an even darker darkness.
Down she goes into it,
Until she comes to the second gate,
Made of smoky quartz,
Looming sharp and tall above her.
Lit as if from within.
It's light,
Eerie,
And foreboding.
She knocks again,
And another gatekeeper comes out.
He looks her up and down,
A strange shadow in his eyes.
You may pass through the second gate,
But you must give us your bracelets of gold.
And so she takes the heavy jewels from around her wrists and hands them to him,
Passing through the gate,
Further down into the darkness.
To the third gate she comes.
And another gatekeeper comes out before she can even knock.
He looks even more haggard and sickly than the last two.
Wheezing and coughing,
He speaks,
You may pass.
The third gate,
But you must give us your necklace of jewels.
So she takes the heavy jewels from around her neck and hands them to him,
Passing through the gate.
Farther down into the darkness,
Into the shadows.
And through each gate she goes,
One by one,
And by the sixth she has no jewels left on her fingers,
In her hair,
On her throat.
Her long,
Loose hair now hangs down her back,
And she holds her robes closer to her,
Feeling the loss of all those pretty things she has collected over all these years.
Those jewels that showed her rank and wealth to anyone that looked upon her.
Those jewels that commanded and gave her power.
No.
She has none of them.
And at the sixth gate she is asked to give up her breastplate of gold.
Which she does so fearfully,
Reluctantly,
Slowly taking it from her shoulders and instantly feeling exposed and afraid.
But she has come this far,
And it's no use trying to bargain in the land of the dead.
No use trying to make a deal with her sister Ereshkigal,
Always being just as proud and cold as her.
And so she draws her cloak and robes around her tighter.
She bows her head lower.
And continues her descent towards the seventh and final gate.
But as she goes deeper into the darkness,
The walls and the ceiling above her begin to close in.
She scratches her elbows on the cave wall.
She bangs her head and the sharp rocks tug and pull at her clothing so she must duck even lower.
Breathing deeply so as not to panic,
She tries to calm herself.
She reaches her hands out in front of her,
Grasping at thin air,
For she cannot see anything before her now the darkness is so thick.
She crawls,
Cutting up her legs and the palms of her hands on the jagged rocks beneath them,
Muddying and tearing her clothing,
And it is in this moment that she begins to feel so very alone.
Alone.
And afraid.
For this journey has been much harder than she expected.
She feels this.
Great emptiness.
This welling sadness inside her.
And it stabs her so sharply she almost has to stop and curl up into it.
To fall asleep in the hopes that she might wake up from this nightmare.
In her own velvet adorned bed that she left behind.
But it is too cold and too dark and she is too afraid.
So slowly,
She continues to move forward,
Crawling on hands and knees.
Whimpering quietly,
She makes her way to the final gate.
Exhausted.
Covered in dirt her robes and cloak torn and encrusted in mud.
She looks up at the gatekeeper who holds out his hands and demands she give him her clothes.
Every last thread.
Peeling them from her body slowly,
She gives them to him,
Holding her hands up to her breasts,
Her head hung low,
Naked,
Cold,
Alone,
And crying tears of despair and humiliation.
She enters the throne room of Ereshkigal.
Its crystal towers encircling the giant throne of swords and skulls,
Ereshkigal's back is to her.
An otherworldly light emerges dimly from the crystals coating the cavern walls,
And Ereshkigal is screaming in pain and sadness,
The sound splintering and cracking,
Echoing in multiples off of the walls,
Bent over,
Doubled,
Wailing.
She is so distraught she does not recognize her sister when she sees her,
And in her delirium she fasses on Inanna,
The Eye of Death.
And in that moment.
She strikes her sister dead.
And just like that.
Inanna collapses.
Lifeless on the cold floor with a thump.
But Ereshkigal does not care.
She is so caught up in her sadness and in her delirium,
She hangs her sister's body upside down on a hook.
And continues to wail and pound her fists upon the ground.
Until hours later,
Exhausted,
Whimpering,
She can cry no longer.
She begins to calm.
Only to look up and see her sister hanging there lifeless and cold.
And in that moment,
She remembers that the gatekeeper had said her sister was on her way to her.
In that moment,
Ereshkigal's wailing intensifies threefold,
Her screams making their way up through the rocks of the underworld,
To the land of the living.
Shaking the skies in thunder and lightning,
Rains of red blood and slick oil covering the earth above,
The air dark and toxic,
Ereshkigal howling as if in the pains of labor.
And thus,
Three days pass.
Ninshbar has been waiting.
Counting down the minutes and hours,
Knowing there is no way that Inanna will be able to return in that amount of time.
And so on the dawn of the third day,
She sends for the drummers to sound the alarm.
She sends word to the fathers of what Inanna has done,
Pleading to each of them to rescue her.
But not one of them agrees to help.
Saying it is Inanna's own fault.
Why would they risk their lives for hers?
Silly woman.
She should have known better.
It's her own fault.
What was she thinking?
She asked for it.
Thus each of the fathers spoke.
Each of them except Enki god of the water.
Smart Enki,
Cunning Enki,
Kind Enki,
Enki who carves out two demon flies from the dirt beneath his fingernails,
Giving them clear instructions and sending them to find Inanna in the underworld.
And down they go,
Through each gate without being seen.
Down to the throne room of Ereshkigal,
Where they see her body bruised and her face stained with tears,
Battered from throwing herself on the floor,
Her voice hoarse from screaming,
And they go to her.
And they ask her,
What has happened?
And they echo back her words to her.
Ereshkigal moans,
Oh,
Oh,
I am so sad.
And so they echo back,
Oh,
You are so sad.
Why are you sad?
Ereshkigal cries,
I'm sad because my husband is dead and I killed my sister.
So they echo back.
Ah,
You are sad.
Because your husband is dead and you killed your sister.
Ereshkigal cries,
Yes!
I was so angry!
And they echo back to her,
You were so angry.
Reshkigal cries,
Yes,
And I was so alone.
And so they echo back to her,
Yes,
You were so alone.
Rush Google cries,
I just want to be seen!
So they echo back,
You just want to be seen.
Reshkogul cries,
I just want to be heard!
And so they echo back,
You just want to be heard.
A rush Google cries,
I just want to be understood.
So that I go back.
Just want to be understood.
A rushed Google cries.
It hurts so much.
And so they echo back.
It hurts so much.
It hurts so much.
And in being witnessed.
And in being acknowledged.
Arashkakal's pained.
Begins to subside.
Until her sobs turn to gentle hiccups.
Her breath studies.
Gee,
Finally.
Finally falls asleep.
And so they wait with her.
Until she awakens,
Revived and calmer.
Somewhat back to her old self.
She sees these two demon flies and she asks them for listening to her and making her feel better.
She tells them that as a gift to repay them,
She will give them anything they want.
Anything at all.
It has meant so much to her to finally be heard.
And so.
.
.
As Enki instructed them to do.
They ask for the corpse that is hanging on the hook.
And when Reshkigal sees it,
She begins to weep again for her sister.
What has she done?
And so she takes the body down from the hook.
And together,
They begin to bring her back to life.
Sprinkling Inanna's corpse with the water of life,
Feeding her with the food of life until she takes her first breath.
Until she opens her eyes.
And returns to life once more.
And back from the throes of death.
Inanna is completely changed.
You might wonder how Inanna woke from death.
So transformed by it?
Well,
Perhaps in the story of her journey,
You too journeyed down yourself to the underworld alongside her.
And you will be able to fathom that answer for yourself.
For I am afraid it is not a thing I can easily explain to you.
But rather something you must journey with in yourself.
To truly know.
What I can say is that with this new life,
Within her being,
Dark and light had been balanced.
But to see this transformation truly first,
Inanna needed to emerge from the underworld.
First,
She needed to pass through the seven gates again not to collect the items that she had cast off at each gate,
For now these meant nothing to her.
But rather to restore each of her energy centers,
Balancing them with the dark and the light to truly heal and restore herself.
And so at the first gate,
Her root was reconnected to the center of the earth to hold her strong.
When forces outside herself came to unbalance her.
At the second,
Her sensuality,
Her resiliency,
Her emotional center.
Was balanced and restored.
At the third,
Her purpose clarified.
At the fourth,
Her heart healed from pain,
Opening to all the goodness and light of the world.
At the fifth,
Her throat was healed and her voice proclaimed anew.
At the sixth,
Her third eye opened,
Ready to always listen to her intuition,
That voice from within.
Always able to decipher it with ease.
And at the seventh and final gate,
Her crown chakra was healed.
Connecting her to the forces of the universe.
The light above.
And her divinity.
Emerging from the darkness no longer as just a queen,
But a priestess of heaven.
And of Earth,
A goddess.
Of the skies.
And of the Earth.
Wholly aware.
Wholly complete.
Holy.
Through initiation and pain of death,
Forever transformed.
Let us prepare to enter.
The meditation.
I invite you to find a comfortable place where you can relax without distraction and go inward for the next.
20 minutes or so.
Feel free to pause the episode while you get comfortable.
And whether you are seated or lying down when you are ready.
I invite you to close your eyes and turn your attention inward.
Beginning to come into the breath.
Breathing into the heart space.
Just noticing how the body feels.
And noticing.
How the heart is feeling in this moment.
Breathing in.
And with each exhale,
Just allowing the body to relax more into the softness of your seat or wherever you are lying down.
As you allow your body to soften.
And to sink deeper.
I would invite you to imagine.
Roots stretching down from your body and into the earth.
Roots growing down into the soil.
Down through the rock.
The crystal layer.
Shooting these roots down into the earth.
Into the center.
Of the earth.
Feeling these roots wrapping tightly around the core of the earth.
And noticing all the other roots.
Around you that are also stretched down.
Wrapping themselves tightly,
Grounding to the magnetic center.
Of the earth.
And as you feel that pull,
That steadiness,
That centering.
I'd like you to come back up through the roots.
Back up through the layers of the earth into your body and then up through the crown.
Similar threads or streams of light stretching up from the crown Pulling you up towards the sky now.
These threads,
These golden strands.
Pulling you upwards.
And shooting out through the sky.
Out into the stars and connecting in with the source of the sun.
Just feeling that power,
That propulsion upwards.
Into the light.
And so if you can hold both of these feelings,
The rootedness into the earth and the sensation.
These threads of light pulling you upwards into the sky.
Just noticing your body holding this balance,
This point of center.
And allowing the feeling.
Being suspended and balanced between the core of the center of the earth and the source,
The sun.
The stars,
The cosmos.
And all of that power that comes from being in the center of these two energies.
You might envision your body like a soft cocoon of light being held in place by these threads.
Moving gently.
Allowing the feeling of the breath to just.
.
.
Allow this suspension.
Feeling this energy.
Moving up.
And down in perfect balance.
Your body suspended here.
Held.
Safely.
Between light and dark.
Between above.
And below.
Between the earth and the heavens.
And as you breathe more deeply,
Just noticing that these threads of light are beginning to glow even more brightly.
And the focal point of the light is in your heart space.
And as you breathe more deeply into the heart space,
This cocoon of light,
These threads of many colors.
This balance between shadow and light.
Dancing.
Swaying with the forces of nature,
The elements perfectly balanced.
Feeling that fire from within.
Burning in your heart of desire and passion and energy pulling you forward into the next chapter.
Balanced with water.
Allowing the feelings in the body.
To move and flow freely.
With the earth.
Grounding you below.
The air.
And the ether connecting you above.
Imagining these four elements balanced perfectly within your body.
This body.
Suspended in light.
And perfect balance.
Feeling the sensations in the body.
And allowing any emotions.
To come up.
Allowing any images to come to mind.
Perhaps one element is feeling more present than another.
Just allowing.
Movement,
And settling to balance that energy within your heart space.
Now moving inwards into this inner landscape as you are held here safely.
Noticing that you can move within into the cavern of your own heart.
In this cavern,
You can envision a room.
Noticing the details of the room.
Noticing the quality of the light,
The temperature of the room.
This is the chamber of your heart space.
And within this space,
There is a throne in the center of the room.
And on this throne.
There is a woman.
The High Priestess.
She who balances the forces of light and the forces of darkness.
She who takes up the challenge.
To see what it is that she has not seen.
To know what it is that she has not known.
And to experience things that she has not yet experienced.
Notice this form,
This figure,
Seated on the throne.
And notice the throne that she is sitting on.
Notice this woman.
See how she sits upon this throne.
And notice the reflection in her eyes reflecting back your form.
For this is your High Priestess within.
She who is not afraid.
And so.
.
.
You look at her as if she is a reflection in a mirror of yourself.
Perhaps she would like to speak with you.
Just allow any words.
Or visuals.
To come into this cavern.
To be seen within this space.
And I will give you some time to meet with your high priestess and hear anything.
She wants to tell you.
And as you finish this moment together.
You bow to this priestess as she is seated on her throne,
Knowing that she is within you.
And you can always turn to her in times of challenge,
When the darkness overtakes you.
To remember that there is always a balance of light and darkness.
Or when you need to seek wisdom,
Remembering that the wisdom that you seek is always within.
And so bowing to the priestess,
You begin to move away from this cavern within.
Back into your heart space.
Back into your body.
And allowing those threads to begin to lower you down.
Back onto the earth.
Those threads of light that are still always connected with Source.
Always connected to the stars and the sun and the moon.
Those threads of invisible light.
As your body is lowered to the ground,
You begin to pull up the roots that are down in the center of the earth.
Pulling their power inwards,
Knowing that those invisible threads are also there.
To ground you.
To remind you of what is most important.
Within.
And now just coming back.
To the whole sensation of the body.
As it sits or lies here in this space.
Feeling the whole universe within you.
A whole range of possibilities.
And opportunities,
Expansiveness to stretch out into.
Whenever you feel you are ready.
Possibility that comes from balance.
That comes from wisdom.
And that comes from going within.
To seek the answers.
You can begin to wiggle your toes and fingers.
Fluttering your eyes slowly open.
Coming back to the space.
And allowing the song.
To gently bring you back.
Rory and Ziggy It is too high to go Go down to the darkness down to the water.
What?
The voices whisper And they can't be lost First,
You have to lose your way To feel it in your bones The silence right around you Let silence spread within down.
To the other world Down to the truth No,
It won't be easy to dredge those waters deep.
Evade the shadow.
The secrets that you keep The priestess,
She's within you The power on the throne the courage of the wise one.
To see what can't be known The roots stretch down below you Light shines within Down to the other world Don't you?
Feel the air Balanced in your journey flowing free with love.
Feel your fire burning Go on,
Repeat it.
Good night.
Dead to your center May you find some peace there For the way is always open The path you seek within Down to the other world down to the water.
Down to the darkness Down to the tube
