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Take a deep breath in through your nose and let it out with a long sigh.
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Persuasion by Jane Austen Book 2,
Chapter 5 While Sir Walter and Elizabeth were assiduously pushing their good fortune in Laura's place,
Anne was renewing an acquaintance of a very different description.
She had called on her former governess and had heard from her of there being an old schoolfellow in Bath who had the two strong claims on her attention of past kindness and present suffering.
Miss Hamilton,
Now Mrs Smith,
Had shown her kindness in one of those periods of her life where it had been most valuable.
Anne had gone unhappy to school,
Grieving for the loss of a mother whom she dearly loved,
Feeling her separation from home and suffering as a girl of fourteen,
Of strong sensibility and not high spirits,
Must suffer at such a time.
Miss Hamilton,
Three years older than herself,
But still from the want of near relations in a settled home,
Remained another year at school and had been useful and good to her in a way that had considerably lessened her misery and could never be remembered with indifference.
Miss Hamilton had left school,
Married not long afterwards,
And was said to have married a man of fortune.
This was all that Anne had known of her,
Till now that their governess's account brought her situation forward in a more decided,
But very different form.
Miss Hamilton was a widow and poor.
Her husband had been extravagant and at his death almost two years before had left his affairs dreadfully involved.
She had had difficulties of every sort to contend with,
And in addition to this distresses had been afflicted with a severe rheumatic fever which finally settling in her legs had made her,
For the present,
A cripple.
She had come to Bath on that account and was now in lodgings near the hot baths,
Living in a very humble way,
Unable even to afford herself the comfort of a servant,
And of course almost excluded from society.
Their mutual friend answered for the satisfaction which a visit from Miss Elliot would give Mrs.
Smith,
And Anne therefore lost no time in going.
She mentioned nothing of what she had heard or what she intended at home.
It would excite no proper interest there.
She only consulted Lady Russell,
Who went thoroughly into her sentiments,
And was most happy to convey her as need to Mrs.
Smith's lodgings in Westgate Buildings,
As Anne chose to be taken.
The visit was paid,
Their acquaintance re-established,
Their interest in each other more than rekindled.
The first ten minutes had its awkwardness and its emotion.
Twelve years were gone since they'd parted,
And each represented a somewhat different person from what the other had imagined.
Twelve years had changed Anne from the blooming,
Silent,
Unformed girl of fifteen,
To the elegant little woman of seven and twenty,
With every beauty except bloom,
And with manners as consciously right as they were invariably gentle.
And twelve years had transformed the fine-looking,
Well-grown Miss Hamilton,
In all the glow of health and confidence of superiority,
Into a poor,
Infirm,
Helpless widow,
Receiving the visit of her former protégé as a favour.
But all that was uncomfortable in the meeting soon passed away,
And left only the interesting charm of remembering former partialities and talking over old times.
Anne found in Mrs.
Smith the good sense and agreeable manners which she had almost ventured to depend on,
And a disposition to converse and be cheerful beyond her expectation.
Neither the dissipations of the past,
Nor the restrictions of the present,
Neither sickness nor sorrow seemed to have closed her heart or ruined her spirits.
In the course of a second visit,
Mrs.
Smith talked with great openness,
And Anne's astonishment increased.
She could scarcely imagine a more cheerless situation in itself than Mrs.
Smith's.
She had been very fond of her husband.
She had buried him.
She had been used to affluence,
And now it was gone.
She had no child to connect her with life and happiness,
No relations to assist in the arrangement of perplexed affairs,
No health to make all the rest supportable.
Her accommodations were limited to a noisy parlour and a dark bedroom behind,
With no possibility of moving from one to the other without assistance,
Which there was only one servant in the house to afford,
And she never quitted the house but to be conveyed into the warm bath.
Yet,
In spite of all this,
Anne had reason to believe she had moments only of languor and depression to hours of occupation and enjoyment.
How could it be?
She watched,
Observed,
Reflected,
And finally determined this was not a case of fortitude or of resignation only.
A submissive spirit might be patient,
A strong understanding would supply resolution,
But here was something more.
Here was that elasticity of mind,
That disposition to be comforted,
That disposition to be comforted,
That power of turning readily from evil to good,
And of finding employment which carried her out of herself,
Which was from nature alone.
It was the choicest gift of heaven,
And Anne viewed her friend as one of those instances in which,
By a merciful appointment,
It seems designed to counterbalance almost every other want.
There had been a time,
Mrs Smith told her,
When her spirits had nearly failed.
She could not call herself an invalid now compared with her state on first reaching Bath.
Then she had indeed been a pitiable object,
For she'd caught cold on the journey and had hardly taken possession of her lodgings before she was again confined to her bed,
And suffering under severe and constant pain,
And all this among strangers.
With the absolute necessity of having a regular nurse,
And finances at that moment particularly unfit to meet any extraordinary expense.
Her landlady,
However,
Had a character to preserve and would not use her ill,
And she'd been particularly fortunate in her nurse.
As a sister of her landlady,
A nurse by profession,
Was at liberty just in time to attend to her.
As soon as I could use my hands,
Said Mrs Smith,
She taught me to knit.
That's been a great amusement,
And she put me in the way of making these little thread cases,
Pin cushions and card racks,
Which you will always find me so busy about,
And which supply me the means of doing a little good to one or two very poor families in this neighbourhood.
She had a large acquaintance of course professionally,
Among those who could afford to buy.
And,
She said,
Everybody's heart is open,
You know,
When they recently escaped from severe pain or are recovering the blessing of health.
A nurse-look thoroughly understands when to speak.
She's a shrewd,
Intelligent,
Sensible woman.
She's also nursing Mrs Wallace of Marlborough Buildings,
A mere,
Pretty,
Silly,
Expensive,
Fashionable woman I believe.
She will of course have nothing to report,
But of lease and finance,
Nothing to report but of lease and finery,
But I mean to make my profit of her.
She has plenty of money,
And I intend she shall buy all the high-priced things I have in hand now.
Anne had called several times on Mrs Smith before the existence of her was known in Camden Place,
And at last it became necessary to speak of her.
Sir Walter,
Elizabeth and Mrs Clay returned one morning from Laura Place with a sudden invitation from Lady Dalwynpool for the same evening,
And Anne was already engaged to spend that evening with Mrs Smith.
She was not sorry for the excuse.
They were only asked she was sure because Lady Dalwynpool,
Being kept at home by a bad cold,
Was glad to make use of the relationship which had been so pressed upon her.
Sir Walter was severe.
Westgate Buildings,
Said he,
And who is Miss Anne Elliot to be visiting in Westgate Buildings?
Mrs Smith,
A widow,
And who was her husband?
One of 5,
000 Mr Smiths whose name are met with everywhere,
And what is her attraction?
That she is old and sickly.
Upon my word,
Miss Anne Elliot,
You have the most extraordinary taste.
Surely you may put off this lady till tomorrow.
She's not so near her end,
I presume,
But that she may hope to see another day.
What is her age,
40?
No,
Sir,
She's not one and 30,
But I do not think I can put off my engagement,
Said Anne,
Because it's the only evening for some time which will at once suit her and myself.
She goes into the warm bath tomorrow and for the rest of the week,
You know.
Then we're engaged.
But what does Lady Russell think of this acquaintance?
Asked Elizabeth.
She seems nothing to blame in it,
Replied Anne.
On the contrary,
She approves it and has generally taken me when I've called on Mrs Smith.
Westgate Buildings must have been rather surprised by the appearance of a carriage drawn up near its pavement,
Observed Sir Walter.
Sir Henry Russell's widow,
Indeed,
Has no honours to distinguish her arms,
But it still is a handsome equipage and no doubt well known to convey Miss Elliot.
A widow,
Mrs Smith,
Lodging in Westgate Buildings,
A poor widow,
Barely able to live between 30 and 40,
Me,
Mrs Smith,
And every day,
Mrs Smith,
Of all people and all names,
To be the chosen friend of Miss Anne Elliot and to be preferred by her to her own family connections.
Mrs Clay,
Who'd been present while all this passed,
Now thought it advisable to leave the room and Anne could have said much and did long to say a little defence of her friends,
Not very dissimilar claims to theirs,
But her sense of personal respect to her father prevented her,
So she made no reply.
Anne kept her appointment and the others kept theirs and of course she heard the next morning they had a delightful evening.
Mr Elliot,
Lady Russell said,
Had regretted and at the same time honoured her for staying away in such a cause.
Her kind,
Compassionate visits to this old school fellow,
Sick and reduced,
Seemed to have quite delighted him.
He thought her a most extraordinary young woman in her temper,
Manners,
Mind,
A model of female excellent.
He could meet even Lady Russell in a discussion of her merits and so Lady Russell was now perfectly decided in her opinion of Mr Elliot.
She was as much convinced of his meaning to gain Anne in time as of his deserving her and was beginning to calculate the number of weeks which would free him from all the remaining restraints of widowhood and leave him at liberty to exert his most open powers of pleasing.
Anne smiled and shook her head.
I am no matchmaker as you well know,
Said Lady Russell,
Being much too well aware of the uncertainty of all human events and calculations.
I only mean that if Mr Elliot should sometime hence pay his addresses to you and if you should be disposed to accept him,
I think there would be every possibility of your being happy together,
A most suitable connection,
Everybody must consider it,
But I think it might be a very happy one.
Mr Elliot is an exceedingly agreeable man and in many respects,
I think highly of him,
Said Anne,
But we should not suit.
Lady Russell let this pass and only said in a rejoinder,
I only to be able to regard you as a future mistress of Kellynch,
The future Lady Elliot,
To look forward and see you occupying your dear mother's place,
Succeeding to all her rights and all her popularity as well as to her virtues would be the highest possible gratification to me.
You are your mother's self in countenance and disposition and if I might be allowed to fancy you such as she was in situation and name and home,
Presiding and blessing in the same spot and only superior to her in being more highly valued,
My dearest Anne,
It would give me more delight than is often felt at my time of life.
