Take a moment to arrive here.
Wherever you are.
Whatever it is you've just come from.
Just pause.
Find yourself in a comfortable position Let the body settle into the surface beneath you.
And when you're ready,
If it feels comfortable,
Closing your eyes or perhaps gently lowering your gaze.
Take a slow breath in through your nose.
And a long easy breath out.
Again,
Breathing in,
Feeling the chest rise.
And out feeling the body soften.
Notice the surface beneath you Solid.
Present Faithful It holds your weight without needing anything from you in return.
Just offering you support quietly,
Completely.
Let your shoulders drop.
Your jaw loosen.
Maybe resting your hands open.
Wherever they fall.
And know that for the next few minutes you have nothing to manage.
Nothing to maintain.
No one to take care of.
Just this breath.
This body.
This moment.
You.
I want to ask you something.
And I'd like you to hold it gently rather than answer it immediately.
When did you last do something?
So maybe you said yes to something,
Agreed to something,
Shaped yourself around something.
Not because you wanted to.
But because it felt easier than the alternative.
Most of us who people please.
Have been doing it for so long that we stop noticing.
It's become the water we swim in.
Automatic response.
Path of least resistance that over time has taken us further and further from our own centre.
You see,
The cost of that is this.
We begin to lose the thread back to ourselves.
To what we actually think.
What we actually need.
Or what we would choose if we truly believed our choice mattered.
This practice is an invitation to find that thread again.
I'd like to take you somewhere.
Let the words carry you.
And if the images don't come fully formed,
Just rest in the feeling of them.
And if your mind wanders,
Bring your attention back to your breath and the sound of my voice.
I'd like to invite you to imagine yourself standing in a garden.
Your garden.
One that is entirely yours.
No one else has access to this place.
No one else's opinions live here.
No expectations,
No obligations and nothing owed.
Take a moment to feel what it is like a space that belongs to you.
You look around.
And you notice that the garden has been somewhat neglected.
Not ruined,
Just quietly untended.
Because you've been so busy tending to everyone else's garden.
That yours has been left to itself for a while.
And somewhere in the middle of this garden,
You notice something.
Perhaps a plant or tree or flower,
Whatever comes.
That is distinctly and unmistakably yours.
Something that represents the real,
True you.
Version of you that exists beneath the people pleasing.
Beneath the managing and accommodating and keeping everyone comfortable and happy.
Take a moment to really see it.
A particular color.
Give it shape.
The way it holds itself in this space.
And now I'd like to ask you,
Without pressure,
Just an honest question to sit with.
What does this part of you actually need right now?
Sit with that question.
Just allow the answer to come.
It might be an image,
A feeling,
A word or just a sense of something.
You don't have to analyze it or act on it immediately.
Just let it be known.
Whatever came,
Even if it surprised you,
Even if it feels too simple or too much,
It is real.
Belongs to you.
It's been waiting patiently for you in this garden to come back and ask.
Because here is something worth knowing about people-pleasing.
It's not a character flaw.
It's a learned response.
At some point,
It made sense to put yourself aside.
To keep the peace,
To be safe,
To be loved.
It was a strategy that worked.
And you're allowed to thank it what it did for you.
And you're allowed to choose something different now.
You are allowed to take up space.
To have preferences.
To say what you mean and mean what you say.
To tend to your own garden.
Not instead of caring for others,
But alongside it.
The plant at the centre of this garden,
The real you.
Is still alive.
Still here,
Still growing toward the light,
Even in the neglect.
He's been waiting and now you are here.
Spend a moment with it.
Offer it some attention,
Some care.
The same quality of care that you so freely give to everyone else.
Let these affirmations rise.
As permissions.
Receive them at whatever depth feels right.
My needs matter.
My preferences matter.
I matter.
Caring for myself and caring for others grow from the same root.
I'm allowed to take up space,
Honestly,
Kindly,
Without apology.
The real me is worth returning to again and again.
I tend to my own garden and I am growing.
Begin to let the garden gently fade from your awareness.
Carrying the feeling of it back with you as you return.
Feel the surface beneath you again.
The weight and warmth of your body.
The sounds around you.
Take a slow breath in.
And a slow breath out.
And begin to notice the natural rhythm of your breath.
Maybe introducing some gentle movements.
Wiggling your fingers,
Wiggling your toes,
Stretch if you need to.
And in your own time.
Gently open your eyes.
And perhaps carry this question with you as you move back into your day.
What do I actually need right now?
And what is one small way that I can honour that.
The thread back to yourself is always here.
This practice will always be here to help you find it.
