Mastering The Art Of Acceptance

05:34

Mastering The Art Of Acceptance

by Michelle Farris

Rated

4

Type

talks

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

Plays

5

What is acceptance and how does it help you create a happier, more peaceful life? This 12-step recovery principle helps you put things into perspective. When we have realistic expectations, relationships are healthier too. Learn more with me! *Please note: This content is intended for educational and supportive purposes and does not replace professional medical or psychological care.*

Acceptance 12 Step Program Mindfulness Surrender Self Compassion Stress Management Acceptance Practice Surrender Practice

Meet your Teacher

Michelle Farris

San Jose, CA, USA

Meet your Teacher

Michelle Farris

San Jose, CA, USA

Transcript

Hey, It's Michelle at Counseling Recovery. And today I want to talk about acceptance because that is one of the principles from 12-step programs that is really, Really powerful. And it also makes the difference between someone who can enjoy their life or someone that really fights against what's happening in their life. So acceptance, There's two parts to it. There's accepting life on life's terms, Which was super challenging last year. And then the other part is accepting yourself as you are, Mistakes and all. But I'm gonna talk for the sake of this discussion on the first one. So accepting things as they are was really, For me, A huge gift when the quarantine hit. Because my first thought after being afraid was, OK, I'm going to do this one day at a time. And I'm just going to accept that this is what's happening, Even though it was really scary. And it was scary for a lot of us because we had never lived through a pandemic before. But part of why acceptance is so key is that instead of resisting what's happening to us, We learn how to sit with it and embrace it. Now, That doesn't mean that when difficult things happen, We don't immediately resist it. I do. I mean, I think most of us do. That's normal. But eventually, If we want to come out of that suffering, We learn to embrace it. And accepting something doesn't necessarily mean you condone it or you like it. It just means that you recognize that you cannot change it. And it's something that you're willing to relax into versus fight against. Because when we fight against something, That's where the stress is and that's where the pain is. This can be if a relationship isn't going well, If you lose your job, If someone dies. You know, There's a lot of things in life that happen that we don't like. But if we're constantly resisting those experiences, We end up creating more of our own pain. Versus when we start to initially, Yeah, We may cry, We may be upset, We may fight against something, Because of course that's normal to have a reaction to whatever's happening, Especially if it's not what we want. But if we can get to the place of accepting it, That's where the healing is. Because that's how I got through the quarantine and continue to because I still live in one day at a time because I know that I don't know when the quarantine is ending. I'm still at home most of the time unless I absolutely have to go out. And the only way I can do that is by accepting what is. This is life on life's terms today. I don't know if it's going to be next week, Next month, Next year. I have no idea. Part of why acceptance can be so challenging is because we want to know exactly what's happening versus surrendering to today. And if we stay in today, It's a lot harder to be afraid. I know for me when I'm in the moment. And I look at, OK, Can I deal with this situation today? The answer is almost always yes. But if I look at next month, Next year, Yeah, Then it gets overwhelming. But that's the key to acceptance is it brings you back into today and it brings you into what can you tolerate today? What can you relax into today? Because I guarantee you, No matter what situation you're dealing with, If you're fighting against it, You're creating more of your own pain. And believe me, I've done this a long time. I'm not perfect at it. So I get it. I have fought things too. But eventually, After you do this several hundred times, You realize that it's a lot easier when you just surrender into it and relax and say, You know what, For today, This is what's happening, Whether I like it or not. And then what we do is we find a way to take care of ourselves around it, And we find a way to get support, And we find a way to live through these things. Because life is never gonna look exactly the way we think it is. So anyway, I really hope that helps. One thing I want to do is I want to read a passage from the big book. On acceptance because this is so, So healing. Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, It is because I find some person, Place, Thing, Or situation, Some fact of my life unacceptable to me. And I can find no serenity until I accept that person, Place, Thing, Or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, Absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. And then it goes on to say, Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober. And you can fill in the blank with whatever problem you have. Until I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and my attitudes. I love that. That can be just one of the many gems that 12-step programs give us. So I hope you found this helpful. Okay, Bye.