Hello and welcome back to part two of a series I have called The Invisible Shift.
In this series,
We are breaking down everything to do with burnout.
If you are joining me here after watching the video where I break down the top three signs of how to recognize burnout,
We are going to spend the next few minutes together unpacking more deeply what those signs mean and where to go from here.
Let's begin with a collective truth.
The truth that I'm sure we can all agree on is that we now live in a culture that completely glorifies endurance.
We are taught to wear our fatigue like some sort of badge of honor,
Always being prompted to remind ourselves If I can just make it to Friday,
Then everything will be okay.
Or if I can just survive this quarter,
I'll be able to rest and take that vacation.
But as we all can collectively agree,
Burnout doesn't care about your upcoming vacation.
Rest can certainly reset a tired body,
But burnout is a chronic depletion of your nervous system.
It has absolutely nothing to do with you being incapable of setting boundaries or being bad at taking care of yourself.
Response to being depleted.
It is what happens when you've been running on survival energy for so long that your mind and body simply stop trusting that relief is coming.
In this session,
We are going to take a closer look at what's actually happening beneath the surface of those three signs I shared with you.
And then we'll move into a quiet reflection to help you to practically assess where your energy actually stands today.
The first sign of burnout that we identified was an ongoing detachment and pessimism towards your life.
This isn't just about having a bad attitude towards things.
Psychologically,
When your nervous system is completely overdrawn,
It protects you by turning down the volume of your emotions.
Experiencing pessimism or cynicism towards your life is actually a defense mechanism.
When we experience cynicism,
It tells us that if we don't care,
Then we won't be disappointed.
It also tells us that if we expect the worst,
Then while we don't have to waste precious energy hoping for something better.
If work or relationships that used to spark joy now only evoke a quiet dread within you,
Acknowledge that as a protective reaction.
It is not a character flaw.
The second sign is the feeling that you no longer have a choice in your life.
When burnout takes root,
Your calendar stops looking like a life you constructed and eventually starts looking like a prison sentence you're about to serve.
In reality,
You are showing up,
You are performing,
You are checking off all the boxes,
But internally you end up feeling like a passenger in your own body and you stop asking yourself,
What do I need right now?
And instead you resort to asking yourself,
What is required of me next?
That subtle shift from being an active participant in your life to feeling like a passive survivor is one of the clearest indicators that your inner resources are being drained.
And the third sign we identify together is hyper-isolation.
That in my own burnout recovery I have learned is the hardest to acknowledge and that's because you are almost the only one who knows that you are essentially feeling the need to hide from your life.
It may look like you leaving messages on read for days on end or calculating how much psychological energy a simple text or phone call will cost you or perhaps you end up collecting a host of excuses you can use just to get out of engaging in your social life.
End up retreating into your shell not because you don't love the people in your life,
But because your nervous system literally cannot process anyone else's expectations or energy right now.
And here's what nobody may tell you,
So I will.
Hyper-isolation is not always a bad thing.
Sometimes it's a necessary action to finally take stock of what it is that you need.
So if you are finding that you are now retreating into your life,
I want to encourage you to use these signs as a prompt to take stock of where you are really at.
In the therapeutic space,
We often say that the first step to recovery is acknowledgement.
We need to acknowledge that we are not okay,
Not as a sign of weakness,
But purely as an invitation to bring newfound wellness into our lives.
As we near the end of our time together,
I want to invite you to pause right here with me and do a quick practical exercise together.
Don't worry,
You don't need a pen on paper unless really want to get those then you're more than welcome to but this reflection is designed to be done simply with your thoughts.
Take a deep breath in and exhale And as I ask you these three questions,
I only want you to notice the very first answer that rises to the surface for you.
So let's begin.
The first question is,
Where in your life are you currently faking energy that you really just don't have?
The second question is,
What task or commitment right now feels like a heavy weight on your chest?
And lastly,
If you were completely honest with yourself in this moment,
When was the last time your mind and body both felt truly at peace?
Well done.
If these questions feel heavy,
Let them be heavy for a second.
Nothing bad is going to happen by acknowledging the emotional weight of the answers that came up for you.
You may not feel completely safe in your circumstances right now,
But I always want you to remember that in this moment,
You are safe in your body.
Recognizing that the filters are slipping is not the start of your downfall.
It's possibly the beginning of your recovery.
Remember that burnout isn't something you can or should willpower your way out of.
You cannot fix an overextended nervous system by demanding more from it.
Give yourself permission to stop pretending that you're okay.
Acknowledge the fatigue and validate the boundary your body is trying to set for you.
In part three of this series,
We are going to move out from the recognition phase and map out practical behavioral strategies you can use to begin to pull your nervous system back from the brink.
Until then.
Treat yourself with the exact same compassion you would give to someone you love.
You do not have to have everything figured out today.
For now,
Just letting yourself be exactly where you are is absolutely more than enough.
Thank you for sharing your time with me today.
I'll see you in the next part where we will continue to explore the realities of what makes us human.
