Welcome.
I'm so glad that you're here.
Today we're going to spend a little time exploring something that I think many of us experience,
But don't always have the words to describe.
That feeling of not quite being ourselves.
Maybe you've been moving through your days.
Doing the things you're supposed to do.
Meeting responsibilities.
Taking care of other people.
And somewhere along the way,
You've started to feel a little disconnected from you.
Maybe life has changed.
Maybe your body or your brain is working differently than it used to.
Or maybe you've just been under so much stress that you haven't had much space to check in with yourself.
Whatever brought you here today.
I want you to know that this experience makes sense.
And we're not going to spend our time trying to figure out what's wrong with you.
Instead.
We're going to get curious about what matters to you.
Because sometimes reconnecting with ourselves starts not with how we feel,
But with what we value.
To get started,
Find a position that feels comfortable enough.
It doesn't have to be perfect.
You can close your eyes if you'd like,
Or keep them open.
You can sit,
Lie down,
Or move a little if that feels better.
There isn't a right way to do this.
Take a moment to notice the support beneath you.
The place where your feet meet the floor.
Or where your body meets the chair.
You might notice your breath.
Without needing to change it.
Just allow yourself to arrive.
I want to invite you to consider how much you've been carrying lately.
Not to make a list of everything you need to do.
But to acknowledge how much energy it can take to be a person moving through such a complicated world.
Sometimes stress demands so much of our attention that we lose touch with the things that help us feel grounded.
Sometimes neurodivergence means we've spent years learning how to adapt to the expectations around us without having much opportunity to ask what actually works for us.
And sometimes changes in midlife,
Including menopause,
Can leave us feeling unfamiliar in our own bodies and minds.
If any of that resonates,
I want you to hear this.
That you haven't failed at being yourself.
You may be tired.
You may be changing.
You may be discovering needs you didn't know that you had.
And you may be grieving parts of your life or ways of functioning that used to feel familiar.
There's room for all of that here.
Now I'd like you to notice what happens when you hear the words,
I don't feel like myself.
Maybe there's sadness,
Frustration,
Or fear.
Or perhaps there's just a quiet sense of something missing.
See if you can make a little space for whatever comes up.
You don't have to talk yourself out of the feeling.
You don't have to make it more positive.
You can acknowledge that it's hard to feel disconnected from someone you've spent your entire life getting to know.
Here's something I'd like you to consider.
You are more than the roles that you fill,
The things you accomplish.
Or the way your brain and body happen to be functioning today.
Those things are likely important to you.
That they are part of your identity.
But they are not the whole of you.
Underneath the expectations,
The responsibilities,
And the adaptations that you've made.
There are things that matter to you.
Your values.
And your values can offer a way to reconnect,
Even during times when so much else feels uncertain.
So let's explore that part together.
Rather than asking yourself who you used to be.
I'd like you to consider a different question.
What matters to me?
Not what should matter.
Not what's important to the people around you,
And not what you think a successful or healthy person is supposed to care about.
What matters to you?
Maybe it's connection.
Curiosity.
Kindness,
Or perhaps another word comes to mind.
You don't need to find the perfect answer.
Just notice whether there's a quality,
A principle,
Or a way of being that feels meaningful to you.
If nothing comes to mind right now,
That's okay too.
Sometimes when we've been disconnected for a while,
Even identifying what matters can feel difficult.
That doesn't mean that those values are gone.
It may simply mean that you need a little more time and space to hear yourself.
If you've identified a value,
I'd like you to stay with it for just a moment.
Notice what that word means to you.
Maybe you value connection because being understood and belonging matter deeply to you.
Maybe you value curiosity because learning and discovery have always been meaningful.
Or maybe you value kindness.
Because the way you treat yourself and others matters,
Even when life is difficult.
There's nothing you need to accomplish with this value right now.
You don't have to prove that you're living it perfectly.
In fact,
Sometimes the values we care most about are the very ones that we struggle to practice when we're overwhelmed.
And that's worth remembering.
A value isn't something that you have to earn.
It's a direction that you can choose to move towards.
Now I'd like you to ask yourself another question.
When was the last time I felt even a little connected to this part of myself?
Doesn't have to be a big moment.
And you don't have to create a picture or relive a memory.
Maybe you simply know that there was a time when you acted in a way.
That reflected on what matters to you.
Or maybe you recognize that this quality has been there all along,
Even if it's been harder to access lately.
Take a moment with that.
As you consider this,
I want to offer you some reassurance.
You can value connection and still need time alone.
You can value creativity.
And go through a season when you don't have the energy to create.
You can value kindness and still have days when you're irritable,
Impatient,
Or overwhelmed.
None of those experiences erase what matters to you.
Your values aren't a test that you're supposed to pass.
There's something that you can return to again and again.
Moment after moment,
We always have the opportunity to come back to our values.
Now we're going to take this one small step further.
Because while it's helpful to remember what matters,
I also want you to leave this practice with a way to reconnect with yourself.
I'd like you to ask.
What's one small thing I could do today would help me live a little closer to this value.
Not a big life change,
Not another expectation to meet.
Just one small,
Accessible step for today.
If you chose Connection.
Perhaps as sending a message to someone you care about.
If you chose curiosity.
Maybe it's giving yourself five minutes to explore something that interests you.
If you chose kindness,
Perhaps it's allowing yourself to rest without turning that rest into another thing that you have to justify.
And your step can be even smaller than those examples.
What's important isn't the size of the action.
Is that the action belongs to you.
And aligns with your value.
If you can identify just one thing.
Something that feels possible with the energy and resources you have today.
And if an action doesn't come to mind.
Perhaps your first step is simply giving yourself permission to keep asking what you need.
That's a meaningful place to start.
As we begin to close,
I'd like you to return your attention to your body.
Notice the support beneath you.
Maybe take a nice deep breath in and out.
Maybe move your shoulders or stretch your hands,
Relax your jaw.
And I'd like to offer you a few reminders as you're coming back to the room.
You are allowed to change.
You are allowed to have different needs than you used to.
You are allowed to discover that some of the ways you've been living no longer fit who you are.
And you don't have to figure all of that out today.
You don't have to feel exactly like your old self to be connected to yourself.
Sometimes reconnection isn't about returning to who we were.
Sometimes it's about making room for who we are now.
The tired parts.
The uncertain parts.
The parts that are still learning what they need.
And the parts that know what matters,
Even when life gets complicated.
All of those parts belong.
If you'd like,
You can finish by quietly offering yourself these words.
I am still here.
What matters to me still matters.
I can take one small step towards myself today.
As you move back into your day,
I hope you'll remember that connection with yourself isn't a permanent state that you achieve.
It's a relationship you continue to build.
Sometimes that relationship feels easy.
Sometimes it takes a little more attention and care.
And sometimes all it takes is a moment like this.
Where you stop asking yourself to be someone different.
And begin listening to the person who's here.
Thank you so much for spending this time with me and with yourself.
Take good care.
