Take a moment to settle into a comfortable position.
We're starting today's practice with simply noticing.
You may find that at this time your body prefers movement.
Welcome in a gentle motion as meeting the needs of your body invites in a feeling of safety.
If you feel comfortable to do so.
Close your eyes.
Begin to soften your gaze.
Or simply allow your attention to turn inward.
And we start with simply noticing the breath.
You don't have to fix anything right now.
You don't need to problem solve or figure anything out.
For these next few moments,
You can simply notice what is present.
Now join me in taking a purposeful slow breath in and out.
And then slowly breathing out.
Once more,
Breathe in and breathe out.
Now allow your attention to turn towards the experience of self-blame.
Maybe it's crowding your mind with thoughts.
Some common ones are thoughts that say.
I should have known.
I should have done something differently.
This was my fault.
If only I had.
If you notice these thoughts,
You don't have to argue with them.
We're just noticing the experience of holding self-blame.
Maybe you can identify how it feels in your body.
Maybe it's tension in your chest.
Heaviness on your shoulders.
Tightness in your stomach.
Or an urge to withdraw and isolate.
Just allow yourself to notice what this feels like.
And as you continue breathing.
Remind yourself.
I can acknowledge what happened without attacking myself for it.
There is a difference between responsibility and blame.
Responsibility asks,
What can I learn from this?
Self-blame,
Often asked,
What is wrong with me?
One creates an opportunity for growth.
The Other keeps us trapped in punishment.
Now take another slow breath in.
And gentle exhale out.
And consider.
I made the best decisions I could with the awareness,
Resources,
And capacity I had at the time.
You may not believe that completely.
And that's okay.
You don't have to force yourself to believe something that doesn't feel true.
Instead,
Simply allow possibility.
Maybe I didn't know what I know now.
Maybe I was doing the best I could.
Maybe there were things I could control and things I couldn't.
Maybe I can learn from what happened without making myself suffer for it.
Continue breathing in and out.
Now imagine placing the blame you've been carrying somewhere outside of yourself.
This is not to throw it away.
And you don't have to forgive anyone.
You don't even have to forgive yourself.
Just imagine setting it down for a moment.
Notice what it feels like to have a little less weight on you.
And if your mind brings the blame back,
That's okay.
You can gently say,
I hear you.
I'm not ignoring what happened.
I'm choosing not to punish myself for it right now.
Take another slow breath.
And bring your attention to the present moment.
Fill the surface supporting you.
Notice your feet.
Your hand.
And of course your breath.
And now remind yourself.
What happened is part of my story,
But it does not have to become my identity.
I am allowed to learn.
I am allowed to grow.
I am allowed to have compassion for the person I was.
While becoming the person I am now.
I can hold myself accountable without holding myself in shame.
Now take one final slow breath in as we come to a close on today's practice.
Gently exhale.
And when you're ready.
Open your eyes or bring your attention back to the room.