The Paradox Of Self-Love

This is a talk about the paradox of Self Love - meaning that you need to go both inwards and outwards at the same time. How do you love yourself and also transcend the self? This is Episode 7 of Series 2 of the Youniverse podcast.

Transcript

Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of the Universe Podcast. My name is Akasha and I am a Soul Alchemist, Meditation Teacher and Spirit Guide based here at the moment in Melbourne Australia. So today I wanted to speak to you about the paradox of self-love. So the paradox of self-love is that we need to equally go internally to connect with our inner self but at the same time we need to also bring our love, Our self-love out into the world in order to be fully realized humans. So we need to be able to balance these two directions if you like, These two impulses. So if we go for example too deeply in to our inner self and if you can imagine your inner self it's like a universe, It really is, You're like you have worlds within you then the danger is getting lost inside of your own worlds, Getting lost inside of yourself and especially if you have a tendency to be very emotional person, To feel your feelings really strongly then if you are going too deeply inside especially when you are having challenging emotions, Sadness, Depression, Dragging you down then if you have this inward tendency then it can be really easy just to to get lost inside of yourself. So it is important to go inwards in order to discover any limiting beliefs that you might have which may be stopping you from loving yourself so any limiting beliefs around the idea of your worthiness, Of the worthiness that you have in terms of receiving love or being loved or being a lovable person, Any limiting beliefs around your own capabilities in the world around what you, Your talents, What you have to contribute, Whether it is worthwhile let's say for you to really fully follow and pursue those talents so that you can bring them out into the world fully so if you have any limiting beliefs around that it's really worthwhile to go inwards and look at these limiting beliefs so that you can see them for what they are so that you can then do the the work on dissolving them whatever that might be and there's lots of different ways of working with limiting beliefs and I will do probably some further videos in the future just on techniques for working with with dissolving limiting beliefs and so this is the really the reason why it's really useful and worthwhile and necessary to take that inward journey to your inner self so that you can identify whatever those beliefs may be that are holding you back and so that you can identify whatever are the really deep patterns that you might have from probably from experiences in childhood whether that be from your family whether it be from the school that you went to whether it be messages that you received from society in general and you internalized you might just have a certain vision of yourself in the world based on your childhood experiences which is just not true an incorrect vision understanding of yourself and your position in the world so for example and I like to call this like a mantra that you might have and you might just not even be aware of this mantra and it's like just a repeated thought loop that is inside of you that usually comes from like your experiences as a young child so one mantra for example might be this is mine one of mine so it's very easy for me to bring this one up it's the mantra that I'm in an echo chamber nobody is listening to me nobody cares about me and nobody cares about what I do or how I show up or what I give in the world nobody's there it's this this mattress kind of like that it's kind of like I'm in an echo chamber and nobody's listening nobody's listening nobody's witnessing nobody's watching and nobody cares so that's it that's just one example you might have another mantra it might be something like everything I do is wrong nothing I do is quite good enough I always fall short and so again is this mantra would probably come from childhood experiences whatever they may be so it's really interesting to to go in words to identify as well as your belief systems if there's any overriding kind of a mantra let's say within you which is just repeating on an unconscious loop and it's very liberating to discover if you have some kind of mantra like this and just discovering it just identifying it just writing it down what that mantra is like everything I do is wrong like I'm in an echo chamber nobody is listening to me nobody cares it's enough to kind of break the spell of that of that thought loop to a certain extent it's the beginning of breaking the spell then after that beginning there's a whole lot of other processes that you may want to do if you identify a strong negative mantra around your story of yourself in the world and one just to mention one would be just recognizing throughout the day watching your thoughts watching your reactions watching your inner observations and recognizing when that mantra is activated so if for example if that mantra is nobody's interested in me nobody cares about me nobody's listening and then you do something whatever that might be you might make a video you might go out in the street as a busker and play a song you might be speaking to someone and you might just notice that mantra is active in the background and you try and just literally be with that oh okay there it is there is that there is that mantra that that is on unconscious loop within the background of my of my consciousness and you just watch it and you watch what happens and then obviously also the next step in that part is recognizing where it where it's alive recognizing the truth of reality so recognizing for example okay people are interested in what I have to say if I'm busking in the street look those people are listening if I make a video look people do watch and bringing in that reality quotient to counteract that unconscious mantra that unconscious loop so this is the work we do when we go inwards into our inner universe to discover all these unconscious patternings that we may still be carrying from our probably from our childhood also can be from our early adulthood or other experiences in life which have left a deep imprint on us which we have not been able to perhaps fully process and let go so that's that's the inward journey then the outward journey of the self-love process is really it's a process of transcending the south so we go inward to understand ourselves and who we are and what has made us who we are and then as we ground in in who we are in the person that we are today in the reality of who we are today we stay in our Center we stay within the center of ourselves while we go outwards and do undertake the process of self transcendence and this can happen in many different ways but really one of the best ways is just sharing your gifts and skills and talents with the world in a way which is beneficial to others so whatever that is to you that will give you that feeling of transcending yourself of going beyond yourself of it no longer being all about you of you being fully connected with the other beings in the world of there being a continuum between you and others and then slowly as you recognize this continuum as you feel it slowly slowly then you lose you are able to transcend this being stuck in ideas about myself and who am I and you're then able to kind of be much more in the flow of life and your skills and talents are literally flowing out of you into the world and being given and received by whoever can benefit from them so another part of this paradox of self-love the equal inwards and outwards movement is that while some of you may have in childhood or throughout life have received the belief that really really focusing on what you love most is a selfish pursuit you may have received that belief unconsciously at some point this is really it's not true at all so the more you actually focus your energies on doing something that you really really really love the more that you do that the more you also transcend the self because when you're deeply in the middle of your passionate activity whatever that may be it may be dancing it may be writing it may be making music it may be speaking it may be being a political lobbyist it may be being a mathematician being a scientist being a public servant being a rubbish man or woman being a council worker being a librarian whatever that is whatever that thing that you love the most is as you pursue that deeply you also transcend the self at the same time and if you can imagine you being fully connected in with your passion you imagine that as being like a light bulb that's switched on from the inside so it's like your your heart let's say is your light bulb and as you fully fully following your passion and your love your inner light bulb is switched on fully and then you basically are walking around as a wayshower in the world because your your lights is on from the inside and this just by default lights up the world for those around you and shows the way for those around you shows the way out of the darkness that they may find themselves in if they are not fully following their own love and following their own passion and their own guidance to do what is what they most love so again this can seem like a paradox as you focus deeply deeply on your own love on what you most love on what is most what what feels most passionate for you this also is the road to transcendence is the road to altruism if you like because as you you're channeling all your energy through that love loving awareness doing what you love again then your the results of your work will flow out fully into the world because they're coming from this place this really deep place of love and truth and honoring who it is that you are which is honoring your calling in the world which is following your path so the same thing as you go deep inwards you can travel further outwards and be more effective in the world so thank you so much for listening this was just a short chat today about this paradox of self-love I hope it's been useful if you find it useful it would be awesome if you would like this video and subscribe to my channel that way you will get notifications every time I post new videos so I share a lot of videos about the inner journey about self-realization about finding out who you really are and following that fully and then I also sometimes post as well music videos as I'm a musician so thank you so much and I will see you in the next video