When You Can't Get Back To Sleep At 3am

For anyone who falls asleep easily but wakes in the small hours and can't get back down, whether that's two, three or four in the morning. This is a somatic practice for night waking rather than a set of techniques for making sleep happen. It starts by explaining why the body wakes at this hour, including the natural rise of cortisol in the early morning and the way sleep lightens in the second half of the night, so the wake stops feeling like a warning. From there it works with weight, warmth, sound and the breath, moving slowly and asking nothing of you. Drawn from Somatic Experiencing and nervous system work, it is made for people who find that trying to sleep is what keeps them awake. There is no bell at the end, so nothing will wake you if you drift off. Helpful for sleep maintenance insomnia, early morning waking and night-time anxiety.

Transcript

Hello. You're listening to this You've probably woken up somewhere in the middle of the night. Now you're lying there wondering. How long it's going to take you to get back to sleep. My name is Sarah. And I'm glad you found your way here. There's nothing in the next few minutes that you need to get right. You don't even need to fall asleep for this. To have been worth doing. That isn't what we're here for. I want to tell you a little about why this happens. Because I think it generally helps to know. Your sleep gets lighter as the night goes on. So by this hour you're much closer to the surface of waking up. Than you were at midnight. And there's a hormone called cortisol. The one that eventually lifts you up into your day. It begins to slow climb around 2 or 3 in the morning. Quietly. Long before you have any need for it. It was going to rise whether you woke up or not. So this isn't a message and it isn't something you've done. You've simply surfaced near the top of a curve that was already coming. Now here's the part I really want you to hear. Trying to fall asleep. Is the one thing that reliably keeps us awake. Because effort itself. Is a kind of alertness. Even when the effort is gentle. And even when it's the effort of doing this meditation properly. So let's agree that sleep isn't what we're doing here. We're resting. And you're already doing that. You're lying down. You're warm. And nobody is asking anything of you. That is rest. And it counts. Let's begin with weight. Because it's the easiest thing to find in the body right now Notice where your body is pressing down into the mattress. You don't need to find all areas that feel heavy. Only the heaviest place in your body. Wherever the mattress is supporting you the most. It might be your hips. Or the back of your head. Or one shoulder. When you found it. I wonder whether you could let the bed in. Just take a bit more. See if you can hand a bit more of yourself over to the mattress. Letting it hold you just a little bit more. And if it feels good. Let one of your hands come to rest somewhere on you. Perhaps on your belly. Or in the middle of your chest. There's nothing for the hands to do. You're letting it rest there. With its own weight. And letting the arm get heavy. Underneath it. Take in the weight. On your chest or your belly. And sense how the hand is being slightly lifted up and down by your own breathing. Now let's find warmth. Observe. Your body for the warmest place under the covers. It might be along your side. Or where an arm meets your body. Or where your legs touch each other Take in this area of warmth for a moment. And then there might be a place where you feel it's cooler as well. This could be your face. Or perhaps a foot that has found its way out of the blanket. Become aware of this part of your body. And become aware of this cooler temperature now. You don't need to change either of them. I just like you to know. Where they are. Now keep your eyes closed. And focus on your ears for a moment. See if you can notice any sounds in the room you are in. Maybe you hear something in the distance Or perhaps someone is breathing next to you. Maybe you hear nothing at all and it's quiet. Perhaps it's just the sound of my voice. Become the observer. Of whatever it is you're noticing. Sometimes we wake with a bit of a jolt. And the heart is going faster than it really needs to at this hour If that happened to you tonight, It's alright. You don't need to slow it down or do anything clever with it. Instead, See if there's a part of you that feels quiet or peaceful. It might be a hand. Or the back of a leg. Or your neck resting against a pillow. Whatever area you find is exactly right. Stay with that part of you for a while. Breathing deeply in and out. And when you're ready. Let's come back to the heaviness Take your time getting there. There's no rush at all. See if you can find that heaviest place again. Wherever the bed is taking most of you. It may have moved since we last looked. And that's fine. Let yourself sink into it a little bit more and if your hand is still resting on you. Notice the weight of it again. Just heavy. Nothing else being asked of you. And now gently come and find the warmth. That warm patch under the covers the one you made yourself just by lying there. See if it's spread a little since you last noticed it. And let yourself stay here. Now let's try if you can pendulate your focus between the heaviness and the warm. Back and forth. You can move between them however you like. There's no order to it. And no way of getting it wrong. Do this for a couple of natural breath cycles. Heaviness heaviness. Warmth. At some point. Perhaps images may start arriving on their own. And you'll know that they're different from thinking. Because they have a pull to them. They'll want to take you somewhere If that happens, Please go with them. That sleep beginning. And you don't need to be present for any of it. I'll keep talking for a while. And you can let my voice become part of the room Something in the background. Like weather. There's nothing left. For you to follow. And nothing left for you to do except to observe. You might notice your breathing carrying on by itself. Without you having anything to do with it. The way it's been going. All night while you were asleep. You're not breathing it. You're just here. Watching it happen. And every so often. Your body will do something small on its own. Like a sigh or a shift or something settling. You don't need to adjust or change any of it. Or do something with it. You're only the one noticing. There's a nice thing about being the observer. Nothing is being asked of you You're not the one doing the sleeping. Your body is going to do that. You get to watch it happen. And if your mind wanders off, You can observe this too. And then come back to the breathing. Or not come back at all. Just being present. The breath going on by itself. The body settling in its own time and I'm going to stay with you a while longer though there's nothing left for you to follow now. So my voice can just be another thing you're noticing. Like a cloud passing somewhere and if you drift off. You drift off and I won't call you back. And if you're still here with me now that's completely fine. Lying here warm. Not fighting any of it is already rest. And your body knows what to do with it. You can come back to this any night you need it. I'll leave you here now.