So I want to speak to you about this phenomenon that I've noticed in myself and that I notice in virtually every man,
Which is the compulsion to take action towards a goal,
But from the identity that you have been in the past,
Rather than from the identity that you are very much desiring to inhabit,
But that you are not actually inhabiting deep in yourself.
So every action that we take usually is toward a goal,
Whether it be something in business or towards securing relationships,
Towards securing a major goal,
A major milestone in life.
And we might have elaborate plans,
We might have amazing organization,
We might have a clear stepwise sequence of what we are going to do to achieve our goal.
But we continue to take action from being a person that we are fundamentally trying to get away from and that we don't actually like.
And this causes a lot of internal friction,
Which is very exhausting and not necessary.
But to move from a place of really self-love and giving yourself what you actually want within first and then taking action,
It's all,
It's easier said than done.
So I want to talk about this practice today,
Just sort of separating the way that we usually take action towards what we want and seeing that it's actually not that effective,
Versus a different way that we could move into life to achieve our goals,
Whether it be in business or something else important to us,
Career,
Etc.
Because we are typically taking action from this place of not being who we want to be yet.
And the idea is that when we take action,
Over time this will compound into a new result and then we'll get to be who we want to be.
It will be this process of cumulative change by taking these linear steps,
Achieving these milestones,
And eventually getting to arrive at that place where we finally get to feel how we want to feel.
Because we will have justified that feeling by our actions which have achieved certain results.
That's the theory.
That's the theory that we're all operating on,
That we all assume is the truth.
And it's just this total program that we abide by.
But the problem is that during this entire time that we take action,
We are always treating ourselves as somebody who we don't like and that we don't want to be.
And that may extend to our behaviors,
Our conditions,
Our external reality.
Maybe it's a certain amount of money that you don't have that you want.
Maybe it's a certain environment or a house or a friend group or relationship.
It doesn't matter.
It's just that we have this sense of not having,
The sense of lack,
And then a corresponding sense of,
I need to change this.
And I'm going to take action to change it in the external world.
But we keep taking action from that place of not having,
Of not being,
Of not liking ourselves fundamentally.
And so everything that we do,
Even if on paper,
Looks good,
Could be justified,
Could feel or look to any rational thinking person objectively,
Yeah,
If you do ABC,
You will get D.
So just do ABC.
But I haven't found that it works out like that.
I found that if I continue doing those logical,
Objective actions,
But stay the same internally,
Then I just go in circles.
And I don't get the result that I want.
I don't create that outcome that I thought I would get.
Even if externally,
There are outcomes maybe that rationally follow from doing ABC.
Internally,
I have not changed.
Because everything that I've done has come from this certain energy,
This certain internal stance in a certain internal world that is conflicted,
That is negative,
That's trying to escape by pushing against and is trying to achieve escape velocity through force by taking radical action by working harder,
By being more motivated.
This,
This motivation,
I think a lot of men have,
Which is if I just can get to that version of me in the future,
And get away from this one,
If I just take enough action,
If I just boldly press forward enough,
Then over time,
Suddenly,
I'll arrive there in this completely different experience internally of myself.
And I just don't see how that can be.
Because for this whole time,
Maybe years,
We've been trying to create a life from a place of not being that,
In that life.
We've been trying to get away from our lack,
We've been trying to get away from a feeling about ourselves,
That we haven't achieved enough,
That we haven't created the result,
That we haven't proven ourselves,
That we haven't established whatever it is in our kingdom that we feel would finally justify this feeling of being proud of ourselves,
Being proud,
Feeling the Holy Grail for a man,
Which is achievement of the thing that we set out to do.
Then we'll finally feel that relief,
That relaxation,
That we deserve to be happy.
Because look,
Our external world is looking how it should,
And now we get to finally relax.
Now we get to finally breathe that big sigh of relief and feel like we deserve to feel okay,
And safe,
And happy,
And proud.
And we've arrived.
But I just don't think it happens like that.
I have not seen it in my own life,
I've not seen it in the lives of other entrepreneurs that I know.
In fact,
What I've seen is the opposite.
Success,
Quote-unquote,
Begins within,
Which is the most absurd thing to hear for that rational,
Really masculine mind.
Because we're so programmed to go from A to B,
And make it happen,
And force our change upon the world through our action,
And using our minds to create plans and logical linear steps that then we execute.
And once we do that,
Then the world externally to us will have changed,
And then internally,
We will be different and have that different relationship with ourselves that we've always wanted.
And this is the biggest fallacy that we are all having to reprogram now.
I'm having to reprogram it in myself,
And pretty much every guy I know who is on a growth path is coming up against this.
And I think that's really great,
Because there's so much suffering that comes that's unnecessary from treating ourselves in this way.
And fundamentally,
It is a self-love problem.
We don't love ourselves,
We actually have a lot of contempt for ourselves.
And so we take action to try and get away from that contempt.
But we just create more of it.
Whereas,
If we focus each day on connecting to and being in the energy of who we would really feel happy about being,
And make that the priority,
And take action from there,
What will that do in the external world,
But just reflect what we have decided to give ourselves,
And the love that we have decided to give to ourselves.
And so what do I mean really practically,
We could start our day from a place of pressure.
There's all these things to achieve.
I have this big goal out there that I want to get to.
Okay,
I just got to buckle up and lock in again,
And work however many hours and press forward and not take a weekend.
Because I'm fundamentally not enough.
I'm not proud of where I am.
I could be better.
The way to that is just to buckle down and work hard and make it happen.
I could start my day like that.
Or I could start my day by connecting internally and deeply to a sense of who I would say I really am.
Which instead of pressure and force,
And intensity,
And striving,
Is calm,
Grounded,
Peaceful,
Abundant.
Even pushing on that a little bit further.
Juicy,
A feeling of juiciness of life,
Feeling of aliveness,
Of overflow,
Of excitement,
Enthusiasm,
Expansion,
And that Holy Grail,
Pride,
Healthy pride.
I could connect to these states within myself,
And actually experience being who I want to be right now.
And the fact that I can do that,
And cultivate those states of that feeling or that feeling about myself,
And have that true depth of experience,
The intensity of that experience,
Right now,
Internally,
Without anything external to me having changed.
That is a real experience.
And I have decoupled that from anything external to me.
And now I have arrived.
Now I'm actually where I thought I had to do all this other shit to be able to deserve to feel.
I've just short-circuited that and gone directly to,
No,
I am this person now.
This is actually the man that I am.
And when I do that,
My actions that I take,
And more importantly,
The energy and the vibration that I am emanating out,
Is completely different.
And better,
I would say.
Because it doesn't matter what you do.
It doesn't matter what type of business or career you have.
It doesn't matter what your position is in life,
Or what your product is,
Or offering,
Or service.
It doesn't matter.
The most fundamental thing that you offer is your energy,
And your state,
And your presence.
That's what you are.
That's what you offer.
That's your product.
So,
In tending to this inner relationship from a place of self-love,
And already having been,
Already being so,
Already arrived in who you truly are,
And remembering that every day,
Not as a means to achieve something,
Or get something,
Not as a means to an end,
But because you have decided that it's better to be who you really are,
And have always desired to be,
Right now,
Than wait for that to happen somehow in the future,
As a result of your endless striving,
And seeking,
And effort,
And force.
You've seen that that is a complete fallacy.
It's an illusion that we've all been completely hypnotized by,
Which is a very convenient illusion for those who would want to make money off of that,
By always dangling the future carrot on the stick of who you could be,
If you just work harder,
If you just get this product,
If you just consume this thing,
If you just get that last piece of information.
Whereas it's been here all along,
And you could connect with this,
And move from this place,
In whatever you do,
And how would that change how you show up?
How would that change how you provide your service?
How you affect those who you are around,
Everywhere?
Because fundamentally you are already good,
You have already connected to,
And made a habit,
And practice,
And spiritual discipline,
To always remember who you actually are,
Which is this state of being,
Which is fundamentally already good enough,
Already whole,
Already happy,
No longer relying on your endless action to get to that place sometime in the future,
Which never comes.
No matter what you achieve,
That's the irony of,
I suppose,
Waking up to this,
Is no matter what you achieve,
As you move through your life,
As you press forward,
It will still not be enough for you.
Because you will have always been putting off your arrival into who you truly are.
So if you want to practice this today,
If you want to come home to yourself today,
It's as simple as sitting down and beginning to connect with your eyes closed to a state of being that you would feel most excited about,
Most enthused with,
Making your day-to-day,
And then practicing that,
And choosing to be that now.
So some of the words,
I like to get in there with words.
I really like the word integrity,
Solidity,
Peace.
But I also like expansion,
And flow,
Freedom,
Fun.
When those words,
When I let them really sink in,
And I experience what that's like inside of myself,
Then my status is changing,
And my frequency is raising to that.
And then once I'm tuned to that,
It's like tuning my instrument up,
Then I can actually play my day.
I can play my life,
Having already arrived.
And you know what's so crazy about this?
Is how easy it is to forget.
It's so,
It's so crazy how easy it is to forget to live from this place.
Because we've been so programmed to go back out to having as our reference point,
The external world.
So even if I feel freedom,
Fun,
And flow in this moment right now,
As I'm doing my daily tune up practice,
As I'm remembering who I am,
As I'm connecting to my fullest self.
If I go out into the world,
And I see something contrary to that,
It's so easy to just be pulled away,
And have that be my reference point now.
But honestly,
I believe this is probably the fundamental practice.
And maybe even the spiritual practice at the core of all of our lives.
Because if we can build this up,
So that it's a really strong muscle,
Then it doesn't matter what's happening in the world.
Ultimately,
I think this is what Jesus was after.
And maybe maybe Buddha too.
And maybe even Muhammad.
These spiritual avatars,
These masters,
I think that they were after this fact that if you come from internally staying connected to love,
Source,
Or God,
Or self,
Or what have you,
You can move through whatever shadow,
Valley of shadow and darkness.
Easier said than done.
But the world is increasingly looking like a valley of shadow and darkness that we are passing through.
So to become actually resilient in all ways,
It seems that the fundamental skill of connecting into this,
This place that is there waiting for you all of the time,
If we just come back to it every morning,
Every day,
Every night,
Remembering.
It's like this process of forgetting and remembering,
Forgetting and remembering that inside of you right now is what you are seeking through your action.
And if you can take action from already being what you previously believed you needed to take action to achieve,
Then now your actions are all part of this prayerful state.
And everything you do is an emanation of that.
And you will take completely different actions that will,
To your previous self,
You just would not have even thought of.
They would not have come to you as options.
But now you take completely different actions,
Which compound and create more of this state that you have consciously chosen to embody.
It's magic.
And it's also not.
So that's the essence of what I was sitting with today.
And yeah,
I'm curious to know if you have experienced this,
If you have experienced that dichotomy between taking action from stress and not-enoughness and trying to force your way through life,
Versus taking action from being fundamentally already good enough and what you would like to be.
Taking that inspired action that's really,
It's like a feeling of being drawn towards,
Rather than having to force yourself to do.
And when you are drawn towards,
You start to really enjoy it.
And it takes on its own momentum and guides you.
But it's because you have come into this core reconnection with your true Self.
Let me know your thoughts.
I'm curious.
And give it a try.
And I'll speak to you again soon.
Bye for now.
