So many blessings to you.
Thank you for coming.
Truly I do.
I was reminded yesterday from the universe about,
You know,
Just the gratefulness that you come.
You know,
I feel it so deeply.
That you're willing to do this deeper.
More feminine,
More emotional exploration.
It is Just.
Brave.
Okay,
It's very brave in this world.
And it.
Gives my life enormous meaning to be able to share it.
Yeah,
I really wanna.
Please understand this.
How deeply I understand what it's like.
When the clouds come and then the wonder of the breakthroughs.
And no teacher can lift it off us,
Right?
Well,
She says she can lift 80% of her karma.
So I mean,
You know,
It's like a no brainer there.
You know,
Teachers can make it easier.
It can provide a little bit of company.
And support.
And May all of your hearts expand with her.
Feelings of being worth.
Of being worthy.
Yeah and of being able to walk this way because you guys are already divine beings we're just reminding you You're just being reminded.
That's it.
Yeah,
So we're calling on grace to help us.
And to receive may we receive it more and more every single day,
Every single moment become more and more able to feel the unconditional love,
Out of which this whole world is made.
The whole universe is a bubble in herself.
This is you guys The universe is a bubble in yourself.
Yeah.
OK,
May we.
Realize.
The divine more and more in every moment of our lives.
And so it is.
Yesterday,
Was quite an intense question and answer and afterwards I felt enormous compassion.
For you guys.
I walked around for,
You know,
24 hours with what,
What needs to happen here.
What What needs to.
.
.
Come to help you guys,
Okay?
You know.
It's really,
Really important what I'm going to say.
Yeah,
Please,
Please hear it.
So when I'm working with you guys,
And you're trying to get what I'm saying,
And what I'm saying has come from countless spiritual fires.
So it's not.
So understandable.
With where many of you are.
It just isn't.
And sometimes you can feel that I don't really get you,
That I'm not really getting what you're saying.
And so I really want to point to something.
Western,
We do not have any intellectual framework.
To handle the spiritual journey.
Please understand this.
Our churches were used to an hour sermon and a temporary feel-good.
An hour sermon from someone who's maybe not enlightened.
And a feel good afterwards.
Of meeting everybody.
It's a group high.
You know,
We've got the Course in Miracles.
That's a little bit of a help.
Okay,
So you guys,
I really want to steer you back.
To looking,
Reading the Gita,
Reading Lao Tzu's The Way of the Tao.
Michael,
You're studying with Alma,
Right?
You're doing a course on the Gita?
Can you say just a word or two about what that's done for you?
Well,
I just started and there's like 700 verses and we're up to number 35.
But just in the beginning,
It's really enlightening through a lot of symbolism.
How the Gita imparts very,
Very old knowledge.
And the spiritual knowledge,
Which at the end of the day is something very simple,
But it's brought across in a way that makes it very,
Very understandable.
Um and and It helps me emotionally because I understand it.
You know,
A little more intellectually.
Yes.
And not only that,
Michael,
It's like you will understand more of what I say,
Because you've got more of an intellectual framework with which to receive it.
Yeah.
Yeah,
Because you guys,
Westerners,
You do it all the time.
You know what you do when When you go immediately into,
I'm doing it wrong.
I'm wrong.
And that's the last thing I want you to do.
Don't do that.
But just understand that you're Western.
Intellectual Our training.
Is not make us good receivers of spiritual knowledge.
It just doesn't compute.
We're so outward,
You guys.
So the knowledge comes and we're so outward,
And then we actually go into confusion and into feeling bad about ourselves,
Okay?
And this is,
You know,
It's kind of crushing for Prometheus to watch.
And often,
It's my words that seem to invite you into this being crushed,
And it's the last thing I want.
But I'm trying to give you knowledge.
I'm trying to transmit knowledge.
And I can't,
You know,
It's the knowledge.
I mean,
I can't mess with it.
So,
You know,
Remember the turning inside that I've talked a lot about with Gabriel coming and saying,
Tell them?
You know,
To turn inside.
It's like,
If you,
You can,
Amma's got these courses on the Gita,
But you can also,
And that would be good,
You can also read these books.
Kind of chronically all the time.
Pick them up,
Read them.
And they might not make sense,
But over time they will make sense,
But it's probably best for.
Many to do some sort of a course or read a book about it so that you can expand your container so that you can let the knowledge come.
Yeah,
Please,
You guys.
I kind of can't stand.
I mean,
It's painful when I see you guys going into,
Oh,
I'm doing it wrong.
And it's like,
Oh,
No.
And even what I'm saying may not be very understandable,
You see,
But as you open up to this,
But working with your intellect,
Re-educating your intellect with how to receive the knowledge It will get much easier for you.
Yeah,
No.
Another way to say it is.
.
.
You know,
In the spiritual journeys,
We have the lab ramp.
And we walk around the labyrinth.
Okay,
When you read the Gita,
Read Lazo,
Read these books.
You are helping the labyrinth work for your heart.
You harness the energy that's in the labyrinth of the intellect to assist you to come into the heart.
And without this,
So many of you are just so confused.
Really,
And then with my input,
You just feel bad about yourselves.
It's really painful for premisuda.
I'll tell you,
It's high pain.
About this.
Yeah.
It's like a mom with kids,
You know?
Yeah,
Please.
But you can do this for yourself.
Now,
The reason I'm raising it is because You know,
As I've said to you're tired,
Like until I was 50,
I didn't really have a teacher.
I did this stuff instinctively.
I just turn to these books.
It was just instinctive and I noticed that as the time went on,
I developed a bigger and bigger understanding.
You know,
Another thing you could do is A Course in Miracles if you really want to stay kind of with the Western mind.
But I'll tell you,
There's something about understanding Shiva,
This guy,
You know,
The main God in the Indian mythology.
Hindu thing.
And he sits in a crema,
You know,
In a graveyard really crematorium thing because they burn bodies in India.
And he's covered with ash.
Okay,
So Prema Sutta just looks in this and goes,
This is a total picture of the death of the ego.
And when we die,
When our ego dies,
We will feel our life turning to ash.
Our hopes and dreams,
They seem like ashes.
It is so what the ego death feels like.
And,
You know,
Being in a crematorium or like in this graveyard with the burning.
It's like That is the game.
The enlightened person lives there.
They just live there in this whole experience is just.
It's nothing.
It's just.
.
.
You could look at it like a graveyard.
In the East,
They say,
Don't try to fix Earth.
It's just burning.
The earth is burning.
It's like we come here to allow our egos to be burned off.
That's why we're here,
You guys.
When you understand more of what I'm saying intellectually,
It will become much easier to grow.
So you can.
Do this for yourself.
You can take this up.
And,
You know.
Look at these books.
You know,
Lao Tzu,
I mean,
I didn't,
I mean,
I used to get,
You know,
In the way of the Tao,
I used to get kind of a soothed feeling when I read it,
But it didn't really understand it.
But now it's like 1 plus 1 equals 2.
So Lao Tzu says stuff like,
OK,
If you get a lot of rules in a culture,
People will become dishonest and poor.
The reason they all become dishonest is because,
You know,
Just like little kids,
We want our own way.
You know,
The rules get in the way.
And the other thing is the cost.
Of keeping all these rules alive.
Keeps everybody poor,
It's like.
Taxes.
So,
You know.
The more you can see this.
Like see the truth of these books and what they're pointing to.
Lao Tzu says,
You know,
If people are left to themselves,
They tend to do the right thing.
And,
You know,
When I was growing up,
Our medicine.
I'm not promoting this,
I'm just telling you this,
Okay?
The medicine was not socialized,
But my mom was a nurse and she said every doctor Every doctor would do 10 or 15 percent of their work pro bono.
That was just how it was.
And,
You know,
Now I see that there are all these in Vancouver,
These clinics are closing because The government cannot pay the doctors enough to work overtime.
So the clinics are closing because nobody wants to work more than nine to five.
It's very understandable,
But what we've lost is the art of healing.
The old days where the doctors used to come to our houses.
Now,
You guys,
This is partly the reason for this is this huge surge in population.
So there were 2 billion people in 1945.
When my sons were born in 1983,
1985,
There was 4 billion.
Okay,
Now it's seven.
You know it's like all the all the And like I said to you,
This.
.
.
This mathematics is the math that produces the max chaos with this book,
The Chaos Theory,
I read.
So,
You know,
Obviously there's this movement into chaos so that we'll find a new way.
Find a truer way.
I've probably really confused you with all this.
I hope not.
What's most important is if you pick up these.
Like the Gita,
Just,
You know,
Or.
I think Amma's got some videos about the Gita.
You know,
Even if you do something like.
.
.
Maybe the.
.
.
Course in miracles to keep your intellect working in a certain positive way,
So that every day you are taking action to bring more truth in.
In kind of a structured way,
This can really help.
So what I'm feeling is,
It's like again,
I'm seeing this picture of toddlers,
And they're all squirming around.
It's like,
You know,
With kindergartners,
You've got about like five minutes you can talk before the squirming starts and it's like,
I understand this stuff doesn't compute.
But I know that.
.
.
The Creator is running the satsang.
Truth is running the satsang.
Unconditional love is running the satsang.
I feel is I mean some people might not agree,
But you know it's.
A higher understanding wanting to come through.
That's why you guys are here.
The thing is,
As you really study the Gita or Lazo or probably any religious book,
What will happen is.
.
.
It will help you learn to go inside.
Okay,
That's the heart of what I'm saying.
If you want to learn to go inside,
That getting some kind of education about these books will help you.
Go inside.
It's very difficult to do it with kind of the normal Western viewpoint.
Because we're so outward.
I can feel your longing.
For a bigger understanding.
And you know.
I've said to you many times,
I can't do this for you.
You have to walk it.
And again,
You know,
The Western.
Training is to come in,
Sit down,
Shut up,
And be force fed,
Basically.
And then spill it all out.
When you get your PhD.
Graduate.
And this.
Is Mark.
You're divine beings.
You're in this.
Human life.
And it's your chance.
To wake up here.
Yeah,
It's your chance to wake up.
This is what needs to hit home,
You guys.
It needs to reach your heart.
Doesn't matter what teacher you're studying with.
You have to understand this is your chance to wake up and only you are in charge.
Yeah,
Get that.
Only you.
Are in charge.
Is this sitting?
Right round your heart.
You guys will get nowhere.
Until you get this.
And it's not like it's on your shoulders.
It's just your willingness to follow the guidance.
As I walked around in all the confusion I was walking around in,
I picked up these books.
And I picked them up because they made me feel better.
And the reason they made me feel better is they were carrying divine knowledge.
This is why it's so important that you realize that you're the key,
Because if you don't,
You won't follow the guidance.
When you really understand that it's up to you,
You will follow your guidance.
Truly.
You will be able to hear it.
And then follow it.
All this takes time.
You're all at such different,
Different places.
And some of you,
You know,
Are not even formally on the journey,
So you might not even pick these books up.
You still might have a heart expansion,
And I'll tell you,
If you do pick the books up,
You will be enhanced.
Good.
Good.
And remember,
Whatever power is coming from the satsang is coming because premasuru is really distressed after yesterday's question and answer.
At how upset with you yourselves you were getting.
And,
You know,
If you get upset with yourself and it turns into a surrender,
That's really good work.
But if you get upset with yourself and you just go round in.
I'm a miserable sinner.
Thousand more lifetimes.
You know,
The reason I talk about see where we are clearly because if you understand that Our Western mind has a need to exploit Mother Nature.
Exploit other people.
To get what you want.
This is what we're taught,
You guys.
I sail these things so that you can see.
What you've been laboring under and see why maybe life hasn't worked so well.
Or why it's been hard to make progress on the spiritual journey.
Because we make progress on the spiritual journey.
When we.
Allow the penny to drop.
In our hearts.
The penny drops and we get an understanding.
We get a bigger understanding.
And you do this by you guys letting yourself just be a human being.
You know,
I'll come back to it,
You know.
In the English aristocracy,
They all walk around just wearing the old clothes because they have nothing to prove.
This is what we all should be like.
We have nothing to prove.
We're valuable as we are.
That's what these aristocratic people get taught from the very beginning,
That they're okay the way they are.
That is what is so valuable,
That.
And it doesn't,
You know,
You know,
It presumed by like you know that they have these huge stately manners and everything and there's all this economic stuff behind it but the heart of it.
You know,
Just that they're okay the way they are.
This is what I want to transmit to you guys.
But at the same time,
I want you to let me speak to you and and make corrections.
Some of you Okay,
You guys,
Some of you Okay,
Some of you are scared of me and you don't want to bond with me,
But you want to get from me this knowledge.
And it's okay.
It's okay.
I deeply understand it.
But it will be very hard for you to get what I'm talking about if there's this feeling of Well,
She's too dangerous,
But I want her knowledge.
Or she's too dangerous because she might crush my ego and I'm not ready.
And you know,
That is an okay state not to be ready,
Not to want to come anywhere near the teacher.
It's okay.
There's nothing wrong with that.
But if you don't want to come near the teacher,
Then read the Gita.
The lasso,
You know.
Do that.
And that will be a good half step for you to be able to.
You know,
Bond more with the teacher.
And you're okay the way you are,
You guys,
There's no,
It's like,
I am grateful for you.
As you are.
And yesterday the universe gave me a nudge about that.
And I'm taking that very seriously.
You guys,
I wanna also talk about inflation and deflation because this is very related to what I'm saying.
When I went to England as a journalist,
I hadn't had much training as a journalist.
I just went there.
I'm like,
Well,
I'll figure it out.
And I got a job finally after six months because there was a big depression around the newspapers.
But anyway,
I finally got this job in the first week.
I wrote an article and the guy was really pleased and he ran with it on the front page.
Okay,
This was,
I was like,
Oh wow,
I've nailed it,
Right?
Those are good.
The next thing that happens is it begins to dawn on me,
What I've told you before,
That I got a job with Biggest bully in the world.
England journalism thing where hardly any English people would work for him and he paid Fleet Street wages,
Which is like you know,
The newspaper street back then.
Really high wages because he was so difficult to work with.
In the next few weeks,
It was dawning on me where I was.
It was like my dad times a hundred times worse.
And my writing,
I started getting really incompetent with all the upset.
Yeah,
My,
You know,
My issues.
My psychological issues were coming up and I just got,
You know,
And I didn't lose my job or anything,
But.
He made it clear that I disappointed him.
And then this was just more of my upbringing.
So I want to just,
I wasn't on the journey.
Them.
But you guys,
This can happen spiritually on the journey.
Okay,
So.
Some of you,
You know,
You make steps.
And it's fantastic.
And the ego will want to.
Use that energy.
To prop it up.
And it will happen.
Beyond your.
Understanding.
Basically,
Early spiritual seekers,
They get The ego will grab the knowledge.
They will inflate and go,
I'm so cool.
And then what will happen is,
Especially around a teacher,
There will be a deflation going on.
A teacher will go,
You kind of got it,
But look at this.
Yeah.
The other thing that will happen is what happened to me.
Which is I would get inflated and I would promptly trip and fall.
And I would pick myself up and I would turn up my prayers and I would purify.
I would become more pure.
The ego would burn off.
You know,
A little bit anyway.
And my knowledge would get bigger.
Life would go gentler with me because the more in truth we are.
The gentler it gets.
Both times.
So what I really,
But I really want to say something to you guys.
If you get inflated,
It's okay.
It's going to be inevitable.
Please don't crush yourself.
A bit of inflation,
Oh well.
Like it's actually premature things.
It's way better to get inflated than to go around being scared of inflation.
And staying there your whole life because you know who's telling you,
Oh you watch,
You be careful that you don't get inflated.
Do you know who's telling you that?
The ego.
Do you understand that is what's really serious?
If you've got that,
It's that.
You've got to give it over.
If you inflate,
Oh well.
You will be deflated.
It's like life will deflate you.
I'll deflate you.
It's like You boner.
Like this.
Please,
It's not wasted.
You know,
I wrote a book that I took up to Amma,
Like in 2007.
And,
You know.
And she said,
You know,
You're not quite ready.
And I was like.
.
.
You know,
It's like,
Yeah,
Well.
You know,
Back to the drawing board.
You know,
You know,
Prima Suda,
I felt like such a screw up artist that when she'd said stuff like this,
I would just go,
OK,
Back to the drawing board,
Like,
Oh,
Well,
Here I am again.
Right.
I'd like you guys to be a little more like that.
Oh,
Here I am again,
But I'm still lovable.
It's okay.
So I've been editing this book.
Now,
The knowledge that I wrote was really accurate.
Like what I knew,
I really knew,
I just wasn't living it,
You guys.
I wasn't living it.
So now when I'm writing.
And making alterations and writing them,
Writing it with keeping the knowledge as it is basically,
Really,
But now I'm living it.
And that is carried by the words.
And I'm explaining things differently than I did.
And I'm making it simpler.
But what I wanted to say is.
At that point,
When I do that,
Brought that book to Armagh,
I was inflamed.
But there was still a lot of truth in the book.
I had some deep understanding.
So I just,
You know.
Back to the drawing board,
Begin again.
Continued on.
This is what the juniors like,
You guys.
Many of you Westerners,
Do you know what you do?
Like,
You know,
Tell me the rules of the game.
And I'll play it.
And so.
Sometimes you come to me and go,
Okay,
I've got it now.
Look,
I've got it.
And it's like.
But you're coming to me from this viewpoint of,
Oh,
There's some rules,
There's a game here,
And I'm playing it the right way.
And I'm going,
No,
No,
No,
That's not it.
You're a divine being just as you are.
If you were in the middle of the road,
Hovered in these seats,
You guys.
You would still be God.
Please,
This is what I'm wishing to transmit through these satsangs.
No matter what inflated,
Deflated,
Covered in feces.
In the middle of the road with no clothes on.
You're still gone.
This is what you guys gag on.
Like your Western mind goes,
Whoa,
I don't know about that.
But it's true.
Yeah,
Please.
And you guys,
When you learn to love yourself,
That level.
Where you'd still You know.
Be okay with yourself.
It's like,
Well,
Here I am.
Covered in feces,
It's pretty smelly.
I don't have any clothes on,
I might get arrested.
How did this happen?
Oh well,
Help Baba.
That's it!
Really?
You know,
I was at a Please.
Somebody's child had died.
It's very sad.
And there was a meeting with all the parents.
You know,
We're all good together.
I've told you this,
This man was smiling at me with his just sweet expression on his face,
And I was wondering what,
And I looked down and all my buttons had come undone.
You know,
They were tiny buttons and it just totally exposed my chest and I'm sitting there with these people,
And they already thought that I was pretty,
Pretty weird because I was a bit of a hippie right like they didn't Yeah,
And so here I am,
And I,
You know what I did,
I made an executive decision I buttoned it up,
And I thought to myself.
I just showed my heart.
I'm not going to be embarrassed about this.
Right,
We have choice.
This is what I want you guys to do when I talk about siding with yourselves.
Yeah.
This is what I talk about embracing your humanity.
This is what I talk about like how we're all bumbling idiots.
It's like nobody has the.
A spiritual journey sewn up.
All of us through learning.
I mean,
Maybe Ama has it also not,
But.
I don't think she,
Personally,
I don't think she'd see it that way.
I remember her.
Pressing my cheek and then looking up.
And then,
Oh,
She was mad at me.
She grabbed my cheek.
And she looked up and then she squeezed it really hard.
Like,
In a way,
Her,
It was kind of like,
Actually,
I felt what she was saying was,
To me,
To look to God more.
You know,
Stop being.
.
.
Stop thinking that I knew.
What was going on.
Maybe she looks to God a lot more than I did.
This is this turning you guys when I talk about how this work is.
Turning and changing and what's going to happen is there's going to be a real energy of transcendence coming in.
Silence.
My feeling is.
And it could be easier for you guys to grow.
But like,
Take what I say to heart and follow it like about these Gita and the.
.
.
You know,
Lads are open.
Work with your intellectual framework so you can receive this knowledge.
Because to the outward Western mind.
It doesn't make sense.
Right.
You know,
Being embarrassed won't kill you.
Being humiliated won't kill you.
Nothing.
Can stop a sincere seeker.
Who wants the knowledge.
More than they want their egos patted.
And some of you are in situations where you cannot grow any faster.
Where you've got responsibilities and everything and it's slower and it's okay.
It's okay.
The training that comes with being a householder is actually even more.
Intense than ashrams in a way,
Because you get the flak from your family and then you have to support yourselves.
In this world,
It's a tall order.
Is there any questions?
Comments.
And a really good practical question,
You know,
Along with the finger exercise that I gave you about grounding.
And I really would like you to use it.
Keep it in mind.
There's another.
Um.
.
.
Key point that I want you to keep in mind.
It's equally important.
And that is if you're in a difficult situation or in conflict,
And you know,
When we.
Many of us,
When we come into these,
We're pretty clear on what the other person did wrong.
And the faults of the other person.
We're very clear about it.
Or even about life.
Please,
When you're in those situations,
Think.
To yourself.
Have I contributed to this in any way?
What am I doing that I don't see?
It's an important thing to add that I don't see.
What?
Am I doing that I don't see?
And that If it's a sincere question,
That will invite.
Your psyche to come in and show you.
Your shadow.
Your shadow side.
Like uh We can have a secret selfishness sometimes.
If we're really like good people,
We think we're really good,
But we can have kind of a secret selfishness.
Hidden in our shadow side.
But anyway,
The question is sincere.
The information will bubble up,
You guys.
You will get the answers.
And this is,
Again,
I want to say to you,
It's an inward journey.
You ask these questions on the inside,
And then you keep listening.
Till you get an answer.
Some of you yawned and restless.
Several are restless.
It's exactly around this.
It's exactly around allowing the answer to come up.
Okay.
Gerald,
I'm seeing you.
It's like allowing the answer to come up.
It's like there's a religiosity that I'm seeing in your unconscious that's blocking this information from your heart.
As it's being pointed out,
May Amma come in and melt this for you at the highest good.
Please.
Right,
Because I know you have a very sincere heart,
Gerald.
It's good.
And Gerald,
This will be in everybody.
This is just,
It's like Gerald is the hook that the universe is using to remove it from everybody.
But you have to allow it,
You guys.
You have to admit it and allow it.
Oh and I'm feeling.
.
.
You guys,
Part of where you trip is strong ideas of right and wrong.
Okay,
This is the biggest lie in the West.
We are obsessed with right and wrong.
And Amma says the,
You know,
Being good.
Whole being a good girl,
Being a good boy is one of the biggest blinkers on the journey.
It blinds us because we're stuck in this good and bad.
I want to come back to You're a divine being.
You're in the middle of the road.
You're covered in feces.
You're naked.
This is neither like the truth of it is,
You are still,
You are a divine being.
You might think this is very bad.
That you're very bad to be in this position.
But you're a divine being.
It's just kind of inconvenient.
You can have a shower.
You can have a shower and it's all good.
This is what I'm saying to you guys.
Let Alma give you a big shower.
And let this stuff go.
You're a divine being no matter what you're doing.
You know,
You guys,
Until you get this,
It will be hard to understand what I'm talking about.
Action.
That's it.
Because you'll always be walling off.
It could be not you,
But it could be walled off.
What I'm saying by this bad and good thing.
That's it.
Okay,
Forgiveness.
Forgiveness,
You guys,
Self-forgiveness.
Self-forgiveness,
Self-compassion.
This is,
You know,
We come with all these vasanas and all this.
Stop.
And the great thing is if we let it just be washed off.
But Laura,
This is where you get stuck,
Bad or good.
Then you're divine.
Yeah.
Right.
Right,
And you know,
Our families are.
And you know,
There's a way that.
You know,
I remember a child saying to me that I wasn't supposed to fit in with my family.
And indeed,
When we have a family that's a little foreign,
We tend to grow.
We evolve because we're uncomfortable.
It was so good!
They're just doing their gigs.
We're just doing our gigs.
Can I tell you what happened yesterday?
Just wait.
So after the satsang,
I was really going down the rabbit hole.
And this blue jay.
Hit my window three times.
It's like,
I'm gonna say.
This blue jay,
A bird,
Hit my window three times.
It's like I'm saying snap out of it.
Get over it.
But thank you.
Yeah,
It's a little,
Little.
You know,
She'd say that with love.
Yeah.
So,
Yeah.
Or a blue chain.
You're love,
Sweetie.
That's just,
You know.
You're loved.
We're just so loved,
You guys.
That's what self-realization is.
You just realize this whole thing's an illusion and you just love.
And you never did anything wrong because it's just this illusion here anyway.
It doesn't matter.
In the big story,
It doesn't matter.
You know,
This work is so challenging because it It doesn't have a lot of props,
You guys.
It doesn't have a lot of ceremonies or rituals or anything.
And those things,
Those ceremonies and rituals can really help the subconscious get used to the spiritual journey.
That's the power of them.
They can help.
Gradually change our minds,
Gradually steer.
Our minds.
So it's important to keep doing them.
But this work is much more zen.
It's much more the way of the Tao.
Without any props.
Just the incredible yearning to become pure of heart.
And make it better here.
That's it.
Teachers always look for innocence.
They will always celebrate it.
And the students.
Because it's the God in the students.
When you have an innocent heart,
The teacher can speak directly to the God in you.
With no filter.
And a less innocent heart is more fooled by the labyrinth of the head.
For whatever reason,
It's either coming from life to probably lifetimes,
You know.
We can work with our labyrinth by.
.
.
You know,
Doing these spiritual practices,
But you know,
Reading,
Because you guys,
You're all intelligent.
Like I have a very intelligent group here.
And it's like feeding the intelligence,
Feeding the mind is a good idea.
Because otherwise the mind starts doing its own thing.
Yeah,
There is a kind of.
It's funny,
I'm seeing.
.
.
This gold energy and like I'm seeing brilliance.
You see you guys when you start working When you start reading the Gita and Lazo,
You activate your high spiritual intelligence.
It activates because it is that that helps you understand these works.
It's your higher spiritual intelligence,
Your higher heart intelligence.
Comprehensive.
And I'm seeing this golden brilliance.
Like brilliant minds.
A brilliant understanding.
And,
You know.
You know,
Always genius is,
It returns to simplicity.
It's just the genius will see the simple answers.
It'll be simpler than anything anybody's done.
And because they've got access to that simplicity,
They can do very complicated things.
That look complicated to us,
But to them are just this simplicity magnified.
Geniuses will go to the heart of the matter of whatever they're studying.
They'll know the heart of it.
When you know the heart of something,
You have full access to the knowledge.
There are a couple of you.
Especially the women who are.
It's heartbreaks.
It breaks my heart in a way.
Because you're trying so hard.
You are trying so hard and the thing you're forgetting is.
Your true self.
You're going,
I love everything except that.
Person who's naked in the middle of the road covered with feces.
I'll love everything else but that,
But that is where your disowned God self lives.
So if you don't learn how to love yourself no matter what,
Like whether you're ashamed,
Humiliated by life,
Whatever.
You keep loving yourself,
That person in the middle of the road We'll never connect up.
We'll never get the shower.
And when I say you never,
You know,
Please know that already Prama Sutta loves.
The person.
You know,
The part of you that might be in the road,
Covered with feces,
Naked.
Pramasutra loves you already.
I mean,
Let alone Amma with a per billion wattage.
Please,
You guys.
You know,
Premasutha who had lost her noodle was homeless.
You know,
Lost her kids,
Lost her husband.
Like,
I was in the middle of the road,
Covered in feces all by myself.
And that's why I know that we're lovable even then.
Because without that,
This.
.
.
This catastrophe in my early 30s,
I would not be here.
But,
You know,
If I'd refuse to love myself,
Who would I be?
Okay,
This is you guys,
Who would I be if I hadn't loved myself?
This is what I'm saying.
It's like your your whole beauty depends on you loving yourself.
How can you blossom?
And I would have weedy mornings.
I might lie in bed and just pray all morning.
Feeling lost,
Dreary.
But,
You know,
I would just turn the heat up of my prayers.
I would turn it up.
When I felt terrible.
It has been a very deep session,
You guys.
And this has come from my heart.
My concern for you guys is I to find a way to.
Transmit this in a way that as easy as possible for you,
But you guys,
The journey is very arduous anyway,
You know.
I mean,
Either with Amma,
It took me a long time.
But if you can,
You know,
The next time you feel embarrassed.
Or that you did something wrong,
If you could just do something like.
.
.
You know,
Maybe.
Go to the deeper meaning,
Like me going,
Okay,
I'm showing my heart here.
My button comes undone or forgive yourself but please you see only you can do it i can't do it for you this is I can't do it for you.
Some of you ask me to do this.
I can't.
And I'll start getting hard with you if you're wanting to avoid loving yourselves,
But you're wanting me to,
You know,
Prop you.
I won't do that.
Love yourselves,
You guys.
Like try,
Try.
But remember,
There's always part of me working 24-7.
Helping you do this and Amma's got this billion wattage.
This is like this opening to grace I talk about.
Open to grace,
Let this love in and let it like.
.
.
Heal us.
And you know what?
You know what I'm seeing you guys?
I'm seeing this incredible golden light coming to this person in the middle of the road covered with feces.
There is this incredible light coming to them and this will be what's happening in you guys.
Door to a deeper self-acceptance.
And what happens is this.
Distraught figure turns into the divine.
Child,
It turns into pure knowledge.
The knowledge that comes from daring to just put your arms around yourself and your experience,
Or at least trying to,
No matter what.
Okay.
Questions or comments.
And anything goes,
You guys.
Anything goes.
If something's coming up,
Just let it come.
Step up,
Step up.
Out on thin ice.
Yes.
Who's that?
Ah,
Here's Caridas.
Oh,
Callagas,
Yeah.
How are you?
Good,
A little bit cold,
But I had a lot of things from the satsang connected to what I want to share.
Yes,
Please,
Please,
Please.
Good.
I'm a super happy about this.
Yeah.
And so it's also pretty recent,
So it's connected to the yesterday satsang and also my morning,
What happened to this morning.
And it starts also last week when I was at the meditation center and surfed.
And there was one big experience for me to see that there's a code of conduct to not speak or to speak in a noble speech and no one cared about it and I felt like this environment is like spoiled or you know For me,
It was an important part.
For the for for And when I wasn't sitting,
I felt a lot of anger,
A lot of heat first,
And I connected to anger.
So a lot of pitch came up.
And then,
Under it,
I was like,
I want to speak up.
I need to speak up.
And when I wanted to speak up,
Of course there were like things about I felt threatened.
But what I wanted more talk about is like,
I felt if I speak up,
I found myself speaking up with so much ill will.
It's so much like.
.
.
How do this,
Like,
I didn't respect the other ones.
In a way,
And I've had.
Fair enough.
Not right,
Not good,
As we are talking now,
This is the right and good topic again.
And I ended up not doing it.
I talked in the end with the assistant teacher about my experience,
But I didn't spoke up in the big meeting.
And I was like always observing this anger,
This somehow ill will starting to come up.
Um And.
.
.
This morning when I sat here in the forest in Sweden,
There was like this.
.
.
It felt like it bubbled up,
There's something with competition.
I connect to competition and that I usually.
.
.
Okay,
No,
First it was like in the yesterday's satsang,
It was like,
We are small kids in adult form.
Bumming around.
Yeah.
And I this morning came this thought of,
Oh,
I'm this,
There's some injured child in me,
Which is like not,
Cannot coping it at the moment with that.
And now it comes to the surface.
And then I was like.
.
.
Coming up with okays.
This.
Competition thing.
Has something to do with this.
And I connected to a lot of things in my teenage time.
Okay,
Stop,
Stop,
Stop.
It's all good,
It's all good.
Listen,
Sweetie.
It's not?
You know,
Sometimes it's.
.
.
You know,
Sometimes if we speak in a group and we're crossed.
Um it's kind of like it's okay it's like you're i feel like you're trying to perfect yourself before uh any action and it's kind of like sometimes we just have to experiment it's like You know.
You could stand and yell at everybody and see what happens and see what happens in you.
And the thing is that as you move forward,
You can use that anger.
So you could stand up and say,
I'm really wanting to honor this process and have quiet.
You know,
You guys.
What are you doing?
Do you see you can do it?
The more self-acceptance you come into,
The more you can come forward with this material.
Because the anger is,
You know,
I get it.
Your garden was being trampled on.
Like,
You can stand and take an action.
It just depends how you do it.
The more you accept yourself,
The more you'll say,
Oh,
I really want quiet.
Please,
Come on,
You guys.
Do you understand what I'm saying to you?
Yeah you are you should tell it as you're trying to perfect yourself because you're scared you're gonna upset the table It's the little boy scared that I'm going to upset the table if I really express myself.
Yeah,
Definitely.
Helen is,
It's self-acceptance.
Self-acceptance man.
This,
You are this kid who's Vulnerable.
And unsure of himself.
You are that.
Helen,
You're trying to do the spiritual journey in like five hours.
Yeah.
This is the problem.
Pushing it.
You're trying to Fix your humanity and you're never going to.
That's really,
It's the heart of what I want to say to you.
You're trying to fix your humanity.
You're trying to,
Yeah,
Instead of just.
.
.
Being a human being.
Just accepting your humanity.
You're not self-realized,
You're a person.
Barely new on the journey.
But you know you're really,
Really valuable.
You know this.
And I see this in you.
I see your great,
Great value.
And you know your value inside.
Yeah,
You know,
Kelly,
I'm not going to please you.
OK,
Like I mean,
The stuff that the divine wants to say to you.
Is not gonna please you.
You have to understand this.
It's not.
You don't want to hear it.
Yeah,
You would be far happier in a way going into an ashram situation and having rules and feeling bad about yourself.
Than what I'm trying to teach you.
Yeah,
This is beyond an ashram setup.
There is no.
Yeah,
And part of you is really attracted and Part of it is your worst nightmare.
Right,
And that's what you need to see.
It's your worst nightmare.
Because to get what I'm saying,
You'd have to feel a lot of stuff that you do not want to feel.
And you know,
The thing is,
Keldis,
You're a very good student.
You're very good.
How many men are up for doing this?
How many young men are up for doing this?
And to ask a young man to actually feel his feelings and feel his injured child stuff.
That even women have a hard time.
Most women won't do it.
You know,
I'm seeing you as,
You know,
The ancient Celtic green man.
You know the pictures of the green man,
The nature man,
The man of nature.
Yeah,
I don't know.
And I feel,
Pardon?
I haven't heard of it.
The green man.
The green man you can you can see their mask the green man I'm just seeing you like a green man figure it's very very of nature and you know that's where you're gonna find your It's that.
That it's like you're true.
I have to ask,
I promised Nancy,
I asked Nancy to come forward with a question that I want you guys to all hear.
And I'd forgotten in the second,
But I'm wanting to just.
Go to her.
I want to leave you kind of like an unfinished symphony.
Because I want you to like really swallow and digest that you do not want to hear what I have to say to you.
You don't.
And it's okay.
It's okay.
I love you.
It's okay.
You're good.
It's all right.
It's all good.
Okay,
So just sit with that and yeah,
And we can talk if you need to or not,
Whatever.
Yes.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay,
Nancy.
Nancy,
Are you still here?
I am here.
Oh,
Good.
Oh,
Good.
Yeah,
Nancy.
Thank goodness.
I remembered I was getting so carried away.
Okay,
Nancy had wanted to ask a question last week,
Remember,
And I I didn't see it.
It's so interesting,
Nancy.
It's twice now that I,
Like,
I didn't see you the first time,
And then I almost forgot this time.
It's so interesting.
So what was your question that you wanted to come forward with?
Because I felt this question would really help you guys,
Actually.
That's why I wanted her to speak it.
Would it be OK if I make a comment about what you were talking about?
Yes.
I've been on this journey a long time.
And something I've discovered recently,
Learning,
It's a middle school teacher and his passion is helping people to deal with middle schoolers.
We get to this,
He says,
We get to this age where it's time for us to start standing in our own independence and not being so dependent on our parent.
Parents just want,
You need to get it done.
Why don't you just do this?
How come you're not just doing this?
Well,
They don't know how to do it.
They don't know and they're so,
So sensitive socially.
That you're the only one that they can take it out on as your parent and so this he talks about how important it is to be with them in the struggle and explain,
You know,
Like,
Not give them what they want,
Not be all about their feelings,
You know,
But to just kind of.
I'm right here with you.
And here's some things.
We don't have executive functioning to think through.
And I think of going to the Gita It's so much,
Right?
And we want practical application and we have this world full of immediate answers.
So where that question came from last week was just that.
It's just like,
Okay,
I've got lots more to learn,
You know,
About reparenting myself and getting some of those skills and accepting myself.
As a good mother,
A father would accept you and say,
I love you and I'm here with you and I'm going to walk you through these things and then you're prepared.
This is,
I don't honestly know who Amma is.
I just know a little bit about you studying with her.
And so I don't know that aspect.
But I imagine it's like you saying,
You know,
Amma is there for you to teach you these things.
You had a question you were saying last.
Yeah,
I'm coming to that.
I'm coming to that.
Okay.
And my question comes up with that,
Where I don't feel that guidance.
I don't feel that security of Amma.
It feels like there's evil.
That's trying to stop me from being good.
That i get on this path and it feels like thin ice and it breaks and something else happens and it is there evil force,
Is there an evil that doesn't want me to win,
That I need to contend with?
That was my question.
Yeah,
That's really good.
So,
A couple of things.
I want to talk about,
First of all,
The word within.
And what Nancy was talking about,
About the middle school teacher advice to parents.
Okay,
Think of the word within.
It's like going in and being with what you find in there,
You guys.
Being with it.
With in.
You're with what's inside you.
Okay,
It's interesting,
Nancy.
It's like this is so much what will help you.
As you understand this,
Being with.
Yourself more like one of the things with Alma when she gives us a hug We feel her love physically.
And part of what Hermesuda feels is the result.
Is that it's easier to accept yourself.
When you're trying to be good,
You say you do a.
.
.
It's like us Westerners,
We will tend to go outside ourselves and do actions,
Do good actions,
And then they will often kind of blow up in our face and we go,
Oh,
It's you know,
Every good deed is.
No good deed goes unpunished.
Okay,
Now.
The person.
Who is who is.
Understands that the spiritual journey is It's like it's your own,
That you're working with material coming from past lives.
You've come in this life.
With sort of a load of some degree of emotional garbage that you came here to clear.
So in the East,
They'd say this emotional garbage,
Or the material you came into clear,
Is like an arrow that has already left the bow.
It's already on its way to you,
And it's the challenges you are going to meet personally to help you drop your garbage.
Okay,
So.
Where you're a little bit defended is realizing what a personal journey it is.
Like you're kind of,
I see you as kind of armored up to face the journey.
Okay,
I want to do good in this world.
I want to warm up.
There's a level that you're armed against your own heart.
You're armored and that armor.
Is going to get pushback.
From your life experience.
The universe will push you back so that you see this armor.
And drop it,
And we in the West,
We're so out of focus,
We don't have any safe place to go to.
If we drop our armor.
This is our terrible state.
This is why it is so hard for us.
This really is the heart of what's bothering you guys in the Asatai.
It feels like if you drop your armor,
Then you're just going to get crushed.
Well,
What I'm saying to you is you are a divine being and premasuda has been giving love,
Sharing.
She has been crushed,
She has been ridiculed,
She has been impoverished.
It's like I got a tremendous pushback and I just took it as I was clearing my own crap.
I'm being purified.
And I let it purify me till my ego,
You know.
Stepped away and what you guys get is more.
The eternal primasutra.
Okay,
So did any of that make any sense to you or how did you feel when I said it?
Thank you.
I felt like you were right.
I felt like I could sense that.
It's it's um it's not It's like I want resources for.
The reminders or the peace.
And I think that that's a difficulty because I do think that the world has been good or evil.
For a long,
Long,
Long time that we all have that sort of brainwashed into us.
Yes.
To see the armor.
Like I want to soften to it somehow instead of fighting it and trying to rip it off or try to wear it,
You know?
It's hard not to be like black or white.
That's it.
And that's why,
You guys,
With all of you guys,
It will seem like evil's coming from the outside,
That there's an outside force of evil.
Okay,
Now.
You guys,
The evil,
Even when it's not in the concrete,
Is just your own ego playing the invisible realm.
It is not an absolute coming from outside you.
Right,
Okay.
So Nancy,
I feel like.
All right.
You know it's like maybe love can percolate in it's like maybe You can let the love come in.
It's not in your conscious choice,
But you need love,
Sweetie.
You need just,
You need love.
You just need love.
And you know what?
You need honoring.
For what you've done.
I'm getting teary with your sincerity,
With your true blue sincerity.
And you need to know that it's loved and honored.
It's like from the angelic realms,
You are loved and honored for all your efforts.
And it's deeply understood what it's like to be in the West right now.
What our training does to us.
And when you,
As you get that you're loved and honored more.
This armor.
Will dissolve and it turns into wisdom.
And it is the loving vibration of the spiritual master that lets him walk through a jungle and be unscathed.
But all of us.
Get protected with our innocence.
You know,
This will take some experimentation with you,
You know,
Because part of you will go,
Is it really real?
But it really is.
So please keep coming to satsang.
It is what I walked.
I know it's true.
And I didn't,
It wasn't in an ass rack.
Right?
You have a very,
There's a toughness in you,
A very tough male.
That comes up to defend you.
People who know you deeply will know this part,
Right?
And yeah,
Right?
Yeah,
And this will be true of many of the others too.
This.
This male.
The more you're feminine,
The more your heart awakens.
The more what will happen is this meal will come in in support of you gently.
Okay.
Yeah,
It's what every woman dreams of,
Actually.
It's like a man in their life that comes in and actually deeply supports them.
Really,
This is real.
It's true.
Right.
OK.
But,
You know,
When we we learn how to give this to ourselves.
And when you give it to yourself,
Even the men around you will change how they behave.
You are entitled to this.
You need to hear this formally.
I am formally.
Telling you.
You are entitled to this.
You've earned this.
You have,
Not only do you just deserve it,
But your actions.
In the.
Years past you've you earned this like I'm seeing you get a badge of honor.
Okay,
Premasutha had a very defensive male.
Okay,
But as my feminine woke up.
And I stepped forward in her,
The male came in behind me.
This is so important.
Emotional,
Psychological thing,
Yeah.
So how do you feel right now,
Nancy?
So I can just talk?
Yeah,
Just talk.
God,
This is exactly what I've struggled with for such a long time,
Because I hadn't.
.
.
I'm not going to say why,
But.
.
.
Aye.
I'm afraid to say,
Like you talked about at the meditation place,
Just going,
I just want some quiet here.
To see things,
I see things like it needs to be this way.
And I feel mean.
I feel like I'm being a bitch if I say anything.
If I speak up,
I just don't do it.
I just shrink and shrink and shrink.
And this is,
I've been in a relationship with someone for eight years and just like mostly friends because I'm standing for something.
I don't want to be in another relationship.
Where I'm being manipulated.
So I'm standing for myself and I've never done that before.
Anyway,
You're touching on a lot of things that are coming up and I'm just standing for myself and it feels affirming what you're saying.
It feels very affirming.
Yeah,
And I'm wanting you to feel safe enough to allow the deepening because part of you you've,
You know,
The standing for yourself.
Yeah.
And and we need enough safety to deepen.
And that's what I'm wanting to offer you guys this emotional embraced so you can deepen.
Yeah,
I mean that's the whole point.
And I don't mean standing for myself in an armored way,
Right?
But I think that when you first start doing that and you felt like you had no ability to speak up,
That's what it feels like.
It feels like I'm being violent.
Yeah,
And it felt,
I heard it in your words a little bit,
That you were,
That there was a little bit of a defensiveness in it,
But it's like until you get used to it,
Until you,
You know,
It's okay.
It's okay.
I just want to hear,
I just want to listen for something.
Yeah.
It's kind of like dancing.
There's something.
.
.
Like a reaper.
That could happen for you.
Um.
.
.
That where you are bringing something very precious.
We want to bring something very precious to this world.
And it's It's like this rebirth wanting to happen.
And part of you.
Um.
.
.
You're going to be challenged to keep trusting enough.
For this rebirth to happen.
I want you to let yourself be guided too,
Because I'll tell you,
A primasutra,
If I hadn't met Amma and let myself be guided,
I'd be totally lost in the labyrinth.
We actually need some input from somebody who can see farther than us.
Okay?
But this is for you.
It's like,
It's really like,
You're not sure that you can trust that much.
You know,
And I'm talking about also some time in the future,
Like it's not right away.
But I'm telling you this to kind of seed you with the idea that there's something very There's a kind of.
.
.
God's self.
Your God gift,
The gift that you came here to give.
It's sitting there waiting.
And it just needs some care and fertilizer.
So just do your best with it.
Premasutra would say,
Listen to what I say because this is what I've walked.
But,
You know,
We all have to have our own autonomy.
It's all good.
Yeah,
You guys,
Okay.
It is,
Okay.
I almost want to stand up and announce.
The problem is surrender.
You guys let yourself learn to accept yourselves and surrender.
To the creator.
Please!
Please.
We don't know the big story.
We know so little.
Keep surrendering.
Keep going.
Help me.
Show me.
We do not know how little we know.
Then you become masters of surrender.
It's a big relief to give it over,
Take it off your shoulders,
To give it to the universe,
Ama,
The creator,
To show you.
As soon as you do that,
You have a chance.
Right.
Right.
Right,
And there was,
Nancy,
I saw this.
There's this gold sitting sort of right on top of your heart,
Just wanting to be allowed in.
This golden.
Part of you doesn't know how to receive it.
Yeah,
You don't know how to receive it,
But you feel held enough by Pramasutra that you're that you're kind of willing to just be there.
It's good.
That's where you are.
This baby is also reflecting you guys.
That you're feel embraced enough.
To just.
.
.
Wait.
And let the light slowly come in.
Yeah.
And it's funny,
Nancy,
I immediately saw you were scared.
Okay,
If I let this light in,
Darkness is going to want to come in too.
And it's like,
Yeah,
That's just your head.
To your head.
It's just your head,
Don't worry.
Yeah,
That's good.
You guys are more prepared to walk your talk.
I can feel this.
Not that you have to,
But I can feel that you're.
The comprehension coming.
And you know,
Alma's doing it.
The creator's doing it.
You know.
I will be speaking more in the future about the process of soul retrieval.
Remember,
You guys,
Try to get what I'm talking about.
Try.
Don't let it just spill over you.
Okay,
Well.
.
.
Nancy,
Are you complete?
Is this okay?
We're coming up to 90 minutes,
So I'm feeling like people have to go.
Yes,
Thank you.
I just want to make sure that you're.
Okay.
I have more questions,
But they can wait.
Okay,
Good.
Okay,
Great.
Thank you for that.
That helped everybody.
Okay,
You guys,
My beloveds,
You dear souls,
You dear souls.
Yeah.
Thank you,
Thank you,
Thank you.
