Are You In The Wrong Environment For Your Mental Health?

Sometimes we could be in the wrong environment surrounded by overly critical Or negative people, or they have become habitual in the way they see us. This can become very toxic for your well-being and it is so important to know how to cope with such an environment. My talk today is about just this.

I hope you enjoy it, and that it brings your life value, helping you to cope with and transcend your circumstances.

Lots of love,
Shilpa.

Transcript

Hello my beautiful people, How are you? So I wanted to say that, You know, We experience ourselves through other people. So we see different parts of ourselves through other people. And if you are, You know, Either in a marriage or living with your family or the people you have around you don't bring out the best in you, Don't limit yourself to that, You know, Because sometimes if you're in an environment where those people don't bring out the best in you, You can start feeling like, Am I just like this? Am I just, This is who I am? No, You are multifaceted. You are different in, You know, Different parts of you are expressed with different interactions in this world. So try and seek out places and people that really bring out the best in you. And don't become, You know, Don't be like, Oh my gosh, If you're in a relationship where the person is constantly making you feel bad about yourself or you're, You know, In, I don't know, Like in a setting where you're always made to feel like you're not good enough or you're bad or you're, You have bad qualities or whatever it is. I really, Really, Really believe that when you are in the right setting with the right people, You will come out, That beauty will come through. So that's, That's my message today is that if you are somewhere where you find yourself like being criticized all the time or being told you're not good or you're a bad human being, Or you're just always like this, Always like that, Just understand that we are interacting with our environment. And we're also interacting with our own internal wounds and triggers. So when somebody says something, It can trigger different parts of you that are unhealed. So don't allow that to define you. Okay, And maybe you're struggling at this moment. So people are different depending on what they're going through. So if they're having a very hard time, Or they're going through a lot of stress or anxiety, They're not necessarily going to be the happiest people, You know, Because they're suffering, They're struggling, You might be struggling. So, And sometimes, You know, People around you don't know how to be kind or to help you through it. Like, Instead of helping you and supporting you, They might just take everything personally and like, Not understand where you're coming from. They might just be like, Oh, You're just this, You're that. But the thing is, You're in pain. And so that's why you are not in the best mood, Or you are, You know, Irritated, Or you are, Whatever the situation is. So just have compassion for yourself. And don't let other people's judgments and criticisms form your identity, You know, Or become. . . Don't let that make you think that's who you are. You are not. You are so much. You are so expansive. You are so much more. And you deserve to be seen in a good light. You deserve to be understood. You deserve to be acknowledged. And you deserve to experience compassion in this world. Everybody deals with things differently. So maybe you're in an environment or with people that don't have emotional intelligence. They cannot see through the exterior. Like, Sometimes anger or self-defensiveness is just a symptom or an outcome of deep pain or fear. So when I encounter people, I try to see them as children. You know, When I do my therapy, When I speak with my clients, I like to see them as children. Because that's what we are at our core. We're pure, Innocent, Beautiful children who come across a certain way as adults because we're trying to protect ourselves, Or we're in deep pain, Or we don't know how to handle situations sometimes. So yeah, I look through the image, You know, How they present themselves. So when I am with my clients, I just see that beautiful, Innocent child that is speaking to me. It makes me emotional because we get so caught up in how somebody comes across. Like, Even the most hardcore kind of person, If you're just with patience, They come out. That little child comes through. Yeah, So understand that you are a worthy, Beautiful child. And it's okay, You know, It's okay. Whatever you're going through, It's just with trauma, Deep pain, Whatever you've struggled with, That's where it's coming out. That's why you are being the way you are. So if people around you don't understand and they can't help you, Or they take it personally, If you're being a certain way, Help yourself, Okay? You can give yourself therapy. You can examine, Why am I like this at this moment? Like, What is it that is causing me to be this way? And maybe if you can just speak to the child within you and just say, I love you, And let's work this out together. And so the adult you, The part of you that is grown up, Can speak, Can, Together with your child, You, Your child self, Can lead the way, Can walk together, Can come together to make your life better, And have compassion for yourself. Even if people around you don't have any for you, You need to have it for you. Stop waiting. Stop waiting. People, They're not gonna always give you what you want. Stop waiting for them to give you that approval. Stop waiting for them to give you that love. Stop waiting for them to understand you. First, Just understand yourself. And give yourself so much love. And just figure it out. Okay, This is why I'm being this way in the world. And if other people are not getting it, It's okay, I get it. And I'm going to love myself through it. I'm going to just be kind to myself through it. So that was my message for all of you today. It was coming through. And I wanted to share it with you. I hope it spoke to you. And remember, You are a precious, Beautiful life force. And you deserve to live your best life, To be your best self. I always say that. And even if you aren't right now, Don't berate yourself. Don't be hard on yourself. Just be kind. Because sometimes the world can be cruel. Sometimes because of people's own unresolved trauma, They can take it out on you. And you need to protect yourself. You need to shield yourself. And you need to truly understand yourself. Truly get why. Where is this coming from? And give yourself credit for where you are. Give yourself appreciation for your good qualities. Especially if you're in an environment that is negative and is always telling you about your negative traits. We have both. We're human. We're not going to be perfect. We'll have negative traits. But we also have positive traits. So keep affirming the good in you. Keep affirming what is positive about you. Keep affirming the parts of you that are beautiful. And remembering who you are. Because sometimes when we're in pain, We forget who we are at our core. And we go really, Really far away from our innate, Authentic selves. And then we start believing what the world tells us. You know, When we're struggling and people don't understand. They're like, You're just so nasty. You're just so rude. You're just so mean. You're just so impatient. You're just whatever. And then we just start believing that and maybe start becoming like that. Because, Oh, Everyone's telling me that must be true. No, It's because they don't understand what you're going through. They can't identify that that's just your pain rising. That is your pain being expressed in these ways. And I'm not saying that's making excuses for yourself. I'm not saying, Or you can just be as rude as you want and let everyone has to deal with it. No. But we can be aware. We can have awareness of where it's coming from. Then you can heal it. Then you can change it. Then you can become more empowered and in control of how you are responding. Not reacting, Responding in this world. So a lot of people haven't learned to respond. They just react to their triggers, To whatever unhealed parts of themselves. So when you become aware and you start responding, And what I do is, If I'm feeling triggered by somebody or something, I don't chase it. I don't become like, If somebody says something, You don't go after them. Like, How do you say that? What is your problem? I have done that plenty of times. But now as I bring awareness into it, I disengage. I just disconnect. And I'm like, I'm not going to engage with the energy that I do not want to perpetuate in my life. I am just going to step away. Or I'm going to go somewhere and calm myself and my thoughts. And understand that sometimes it has nothing to do with you. Like I said, We can become triggered or reacted because of our pain or our stress. Others, Everybody's the same. And so maybe it has nothing to do with you. They're just expressing their own pain. They're expressing their own fears. They're expressing, They're transferring their own anxiety onto you sometimes. So become aware, Become aware of the situation. And if you find somebody behaving like that with you, Have a response to it rather than a reaction to it. When we react, We are just doing what is like very repetitive. You know, We're not giving it thought. And we can control our emotions by thinking correctly. I am trained in REBT, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. And there you learn that you think, Oh, I'm just feeling like this. I'm just feeling like that. Oh, I'm angry now. I'm happy now. I'm sad now. A lot has to do with the way you think about it. So by changing your habitual thought patterns about things, You can change your emotional state. And you can be more in control of your emotional state when you choose and become aware not to engage with thoughts that keep you in that state, Not your own thoughts, Or not to engage with a situation by reacting to it. Ask yourself, Do I want this energy to continue in my life? Whatever you want to see in your life, Engage with that. If you're in a situation that is not good for you, You don't want that energy in your life, Just consciously disconnect. Disengage. Because it's going to save you so much time, So much of your like mental health and peace when you do that. Okay? So yes, That's my message for all of you beautiful souls today. I hope you enjoyed this. If you did, My darlings, And if it helped you, Do share it with other people, Whoever needs it. That's why I'm here. I want to help people. I want everyone to feel better. I want to give people tools that I have struggled with myself, And I've learned. I've learned this all because I've been through it. I'm not perfect. And I love to learn from everyone. So I'm happy. I can't wait to learn from you. What wisdom did you get? What did you gain? That is why I'm here. And so please do share it. Do subscribe if you want to be a part of this community, If you want to hear more. And let's really connect with each other. Let's truly understand each other. Let's build awareness in this world so that we can have better relationships, So that we can be more peaceful, So that we can be happier, And so that we can achieve a lot more because we are in charge. We are not handing over our power all the time to what somebody said or did or how they are. We're keeping our own power intact within us. All right, My darlings, You take care. Have a beautiful day or evening, Whatever time it is for you. And I will talk to you again soon. All my love and blessings.

Reviews

This was exactly what I needed to hear this morning!