So throat.
Religious spiritual history.
Grace has been talked about.
It is the love.
That you are made out of.
It is the love that creates this physical reality.
There is you receive grace,
Whether you receive,
Whether you deserve it or not.
And if you.
You know,
Do bring your light forward.
The universe's grace comes in like.
.
.
All the support.
You need.
Yeah,
To keep going,
To keep finding strength.
It will be there.
And keep working with your brain.
Body,
Your conditioning,
Your personality,
To keep remembering the bigger story,
To keep giving over.
Any unhappiness dense emotions that all interrupt.
With our receiving of grace,
You guys.
You can give it over and grace lifts it off you.
Yeah.
Yeah,
You step into the sunshine.
It takes practice.
It takes total devotion.
But it's there.
It's our birthright.
It's your birthright.
You can't escape it.
And if you run from grace,
It will chase you.
Yeah,
It will wear a scary mask.
And chase you and you'll think it's like.
Your worst enemy,
But it's just grace.
It's just love.
And,
You know,
If we're in fear,
Even grace seems tarnished.
When we step into love.
We get all the treasures of the universe.
Okay,
Remember this.
Remember this,
Only you are in charge of whether you're running from grace or whether you're allowing grace to embrace you.
Yeah,
And if you're running from it,
Embrace yourself.
You're still lovable.
You're still eternal.
You're still priceless.
And as you embrace yourself,
You will open to receive grace.
And so it is.
Okay.
Yeah,
Just had to remind you of that.
The point of power is you guys.
And I know that our conditioning tells us the opposite.
And we can't grab grace,
We can't demand it.
We are in.
Mm-hmm.
May this really come home.
To you and may it really come home to you during the satsang and come home to everybody who's listening.
Because you are grace,
You are divine love.
Nobody can take it from you.
You are that.
We've just been deluded.
And this work is to remind you.
And we have armor.
See you in a bit.
Anyway.
So it's a question and answer,
And I think everybody's come forward with early memories or early dreams.
If somebody hasn't come forward with that and wishes to.
Can you come forward now?
Otherwise,
We'll just move into general questions.
Yes,
Yes.
Yeah.
I had the chance to be at the meditation center again and surf there.
And there was a particular experience I would love to share.
And So.
.
.
Yeah.
There we had in one session,
I think it was in this case a one-on-one session,
We talked about a statue,
Like a tense statue to be like this.
Yeah,
Like being a spiritual statue?
Yeah,
Being a spiritual statue,
Yes.
And we talked about the influencer pictures.
And I was next to the serving,
We had some time to also meditate with the students.
And I think on the second day or third day,
I was sitting and I discovered some subtle tension in my between hips and the legs,
Specifically on the on the right side,
And also my shoulders on both sides.
And I felt like really like sitting like want to meditate like,
Like,
Like be like really in this pose and and then I realized this feels not right,
Not comfortable and then I started to relax like the shoulders and also the yeah the leg and the hips so the the space in between and when I did it a almost unbearable feeling came up.
It felt like I was losing myself.
Control or give up control and it was like almost unbearable,
I thought I will collapse there.
And this meditation technique and also what we learn here is to observe.
And I observed,
Just be as it is.
And for the first,
I felt I couldn't bear it.
And somehow,
I just went through it in the sense of observed it and it took a whole day or even one and a half days to kind of reverse it from whenever the awareness were gone I got tense again and then I relaxed again and then this feeling came up and then when I lost the awareness again tense and it took one and a half days to reverse this pattern and like And to let it go,
This control,
For me it felt like I used to control everything and this posture was like controlling,
Like I control my meditation.
And it felt like I let go more.
And then this,
It was,
What is not a pain,
It was this feeling of,
I couldn't describe,
It's a mix of weakness,
Thirst,
And I cannot take it,
And this loss of control.
I don't know,
It was a really strong,
Weird,
Couldn't describe feeling.
And slowly,
With time and patience,
I went away and now I have such,
I feel smaller space,
So I felt like really I have more space now in my hips and legs,
Between the legs.
I feel like when I walk and I'm aware,
I'm a little bit more loose in the walk.
Yeah.
And yeah it's still awareness like sometimes when i don't have awareness it's still comes a little back it's fine um but i managed to reverse it um like in a big so it's not like this automatic thing what i had before and that The whole experience,
Because it was so intense for me,
Was interesting to observe.
Yeah.
So Callidus noticed the transcendent body approach where we talk about the shoulders being about responsibility and the hips being power.
Okay,
Is there anything else?
I'm just Just making sure,
I don't know,
But is there anything else you want to say about this at all?
And maybe you're complete.
I just want to make sure.
It just reminded me and made me humorous laughing about the spiritual statue we talked about two months beforehand.
And it really felt like a little bit from the spiritual statue got smashed.
Because we talked about it,
I connected to that.
Yeah,
Good.
That it sounds like that helped you actually with your surrender because you could see that you you know,
You were seen clearly.
The information was right and you could surrender into more trust as a result.
And this is fantastic.
Okay,
Fantastic.
In lots of ways,
It's the kind of thing I hoped with coming up with this.
Body approach that it would be.
Assist people just like.
It has with colleges.
Because I found it out through just noticing.
Okay,
So but there is a small key.
And I'm going to point it out to help you right through the door.
Kalidus,
You've got it.
You're kind of coming through a door and you're not quite through yet.
And I want to point something out.
In the way you spoke.
You are still seeing yourself as the doer.
And fixing this complex.
Right.
Okay.
Yeah.
And that That point of view is coming from the complex.
All of you guys hear this,
Please.
Yeah,
Mitchie,
It's so funny.
It's just,
We go off.
I know,
You're so sweet.
Just when we need to get it,
We go.
I watch you guys,
Like,
Lose focus just when something is,
Like,
To help you.
Anyway.
This thought pattern is part of the complex,
So even as you're thinking,
I'm coming out of the complex,
The part that's thinking that is,
In fact,
Mired in the complex.
You are not doing it.
You know,
This is where,
And it's really important,
Keledis,
For all of you guys,
When I talk about,
You know,
Just.
.
.
Nurturing yourself into something like treating.
It's like working with your complexes like inconvenient children.
Who are like acting up and you're just.
You know,
It's kind of irritating,
But you just know that if you are rough with them,
It's going to get worse.
So you're just kind of patient and loving.
Okay,
Callitus,
And part of you wants to resist this.
And the part of you that wants to resist what I'm saying is scared of another deeper feeling experience of vulnerability underneath this control thing.
It's a scare that there's more of this uncomfortable feelings and it doesn't want to feel that way.
I can feel that this is not getting through to you.
It's very interesting.
And don't worry.
I mean,
You know,
This is like we're playing charades.
You know,
We're playing it's a game.
It's like hide and seek charades.
It's like I'm going I see you.
I see you!
Yeah,
I see you.
I see who you are.
Yeah,
I see you.
I see tricks.
I see tricks.
Here you are.
There you are.
And sometimes,
You know,
Sometimes I go,
Hey,
I'm seeing the tricks.
Okay,
Callidus,
You know,
Part of you doesn't want to come out of the statue.
I can feel it.
You're kind of like,
It's kind of like,
What do you want,
Woman?
Like,
You're going,
What do you want,
Woman?
It's like,
I'm doing good work.
I'm doing good work.
But you're doing it.
From this.
Part of you is still in the complex,
Pleasing your teacher in a way.
You know.
So that you can be validated and you can be a statue again.
It's a subtlety that I'm talking about,
Callidus.
It is actually easier for women to get this.
About just loving yourself into it,
Embracing yourself into it.
So,
Okay,
So how do you feel right now?
And be very,
Very honest,
Please.
Yeah,
I feel my heartbeats pumping.
Past.
Bye.
I feel not really comfortable in my skin at the moment.
This is good.
That's it.
So it's like,
Yeah,
The ego is feeling a bit of fear.
It's like,
I didn't expect this.
I expected a pat on the back.
And you got a pat on the back.
That was excellent work.
But you're halfway through the door,
Kaloudis.
I'm trying to help you right through it.
Yeah,
I feel like maybe that's,
You know,
What you did is.
.
.
As far as you can go maybe right now.
Yeah,
And there's nothing wrong with that.
And Kalidus,
I mean,
This is really good.
I mean,
It took me years to figure out this body approach.
So you're getting the comprehension really good,
But part of you is trying to keep your status as a spiritual good student.
And there's nothing wrong with that either.
It's just what we're like.
You're kind of going,
Well,
Who would I be without my ego?
And yeah,
Well,
You'd be a divine being,
But you won't feel that.
You'll feel that you'll be a terribly injured child.
Without your ego.
Yeah,
Sweetie.
Yeah.
You guys are so adorable.
You know,
It's like I,
I.
.
.
I mean,
This work is very deflating,
And that's the power of it.
If you can stand it,
You can make tremendous progress.
Yeah,
Think of it that way,
Callidus.
That is the truth.
It's like an extreme sport.
This is very Cali.
With a lot of love,
But it's very Cali.
You know why?
Because I had to be Callie with myself.
You know,
Candice,
It's interesting to me,
Like,
Why would it hurt to know that you're halfway through the door rather than fully?
Why would that be hard to embrace?
Maybe because there's a pattern always to go to the goal immediately,
And halfway is halfway.
Half empty,
Glass half empty.
Is that what you think it is?
Is that a question or are you telling me?
Yeah,
It was.
Was trying to explain myself.
Okay.
Because you'd like to.
So that is the statue.
Do you see the statue in that?
That you want to be like,
You know,
Do it.
A hole in one.
Yeah.
This,
Because this,
Yeah.
Right.
Okay,
That's all I wanted you to see.
Right,
Yeah.
You guys,
When we see our tricks,
We can't do it anymore.
When we see them,
A teacher can tell us,
But it's when we see them up close and personal of our tricks.
That we change,
Really.
Right.
How does your body feel now,
Pathologist?
Kids smart.
Confident.
More,
Sorry.
More more like positive more more confident yeah confident positive more elevated so like before yeah you feel more grounded to me.
It's like a little bit more grounding.
Yeah,
Feel the earth might be quite good.
Yes.
Okay,
You guys,
We get ungrounded when we're running from our thoughts and feelings.
And when we come into our Personal power,
When we move into truth,
We become very grounded.
Because we're not running from anything.
So any movement into you guys feeling more grounded.
Is good work and it's why I gave you the.
The exercise last week about grounding and you can.
Keep it and use it.
That finger exercise.
That's it.
These are our precious little hints and keys for the journey.
So remember them,
You know,
Write a list of all the you know,
If I give a technique credit down and use it.
Hopefully.
Yeah,
You guys.
Ah,
There's a kind of feeling of dreariness.
It's kind of like,
You know,
The dreariness of a childhood where you know you're being raised out of alignment.
And it takes the joy out of life,
Takes the fun out of life.
And it's all of you guys.
It's like I'm feeling this dreariness come up.
And sometimes the spiritual journey is dreary.
It feels dreary.
It's like,
Ah,
When am I going to make progress?
When is it going to happen?
I can feel there's some insecurity coming up.
Yeah.
You guys,
This journey is really safe,
But this is the highest level training you can do.
And it's very distilled with Prama Suta's way.
It's very distilled.
But it's very safe.
We just have to,
You know,
Realize that we're bumbling idiots.
That's why I keep saying,
Like,
Let yourself be a bumbling idiot.
Like,
Please,
Why would you not be one?
Please.
What makes you so special that you can come out of your ego seamlessly with no effort?
Like doing a paint by numbers.
Like,
That's just crazy.
Really and this is what spiritual students think okay tell me show me the tell me the rules and i'll play the game and it's the opposite It's the absolute opposite of that.
I'm feeling like there's this desire to be true in all of you here.
You really want to be true.
And this is what I want to help you with.
That's it.
And,
You know,
You're nervous and I get it.
But,
You know,
I mean,
I'm as the.
She's the.
.
.
You know.
The wonder.
But there are a lot of people around her who just hold on to her body.
And they miss.
But they're just doing it slower.
It's okay.
You guys,
If we live horizontally,
If we just go through our lives kind of horizontally,
We may not make much spiritual progress,
But it's far less stressful as soon as we want to go up.
E-ball.
It is stressful on your organism.
It's stressful for your ego.
It's stressful for your body.
It's stressful for your relationships.
But that's the journey of self-realization.
There is no rush,
You guys,
And you're not to be pushed.
Like I said,
You know,
We're in this turning.
This training is turning.
We're going in a.
Slightly,
I'm going to be teaching in different ways and then it,
You know,
It's like it will take time to gel and just keep holding on,
You know,
Even if you don't understand what's going on.
Just keep.
Holding on.
Listen to your heart.
But whether you go ahead or not.
It's as if some of you could come into great clarity in the next while.
Great clarity and that will help your journey immensely.
Anybody else got any.
Colleges have you completed is this.
Are you finished or is there anything more?
This,
This for now it's finished.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
So I would say just keep going,
You're on the right track.
And just become more.
Loving.
With yourself.
Yeah,
Make room to be a bumbling fool because we all are you guys.
This is the hardest thing for your egos.
But we are.
It's like the fool in the fairy tale.
Who always says the thing that,
You know,
Nobody in the collective wants to hear.
But he's the one who's graced with divinity.
And that's the rub,
You guys.
It's in your foolishness that your divinity is in.
In your bumbling humanity.
And if you cannot accept your bumbling humanity,
You will never achieve self-realization.
And I want to make that very clear.
You will never do it.
Because the journey to self-realization is a total acceptance of humanity.
And when you totally accept your humanity,
You.
.
.
Are then you become free to live out your divine nature.
And if you're rejecting your humanity and judging it and you know,
That is what you will be doing to your divine nature.
We don't scorn Amish humanity.
We don't score in Christ's humanity.
We don't judge him for saying on the cross,
Lord,
Why hast thou forsaken me?
We totally understand that even,
You know,
A God being like Jesus would have some wobbly moments on the cross.
Offer yourselves.
The same.
Heart.
Pre-mastered it,
Laura.
Anyway,
How are you?
I don't know what's going to come out of my mouth,
But my heart is bursting out of my chest.
I'm afraid I'm going to get decapitated and that's probably a good thing.
I'm serious.
You know I am.
I mean,
Call this org.
I'm mad at myself,
Just like you said,
For bringing me here where I don't fit in.
And you said to me once,
It's not them,
It's me accepting myself.
If I stay here in my room,
I'm fine.
I don't know how to do this.
I just don't know how to do it.
I know.
Yeah,
I know.
I know you don't,
Sweetie.
You know,
I mean,
Sweetie,
Just being,
You know.
It's like winter.
You know,
The moving doesn't really work,
Right?
The what?
The moving,
How many times have you moved in the last two years,
Like six times?
Oh my gosh,
This was seven.
I had to move to a place that I could afford.
The other one was too expensive.
I wanted to move in with my mother and that wasn't.
.
.
Possible.
Okay.
So I'm living by myself.
And my biggest fears are looming up all over the place.
And my neighbor's a compulsive liar.
And I know that he's just a mirror of me.
I'm not.
Well.
Yeah,
I mean,
Humanity has got lots of words.
Right now,
You know,
Like it's everywhere.
Thank you.
Nice,
Sweetie.
And you but you were living with your family for a while,
Right?
And you you got restless there.
I was living with them for about three weeks when I landed in Florida,
But I needed to be in the facility because I needed more support.
And there was no one home during the day.
That's why I lived there for a year,
But now I'm at the point where I can be on my own again.
Bye.
Which is a good thing.
Great,
With a lot of help.
Yeah,
You know,
Laura,
You're really good about speaking to Ama and we know that you've got a medical thing going on with your brain which just,
You know,
Is quite a challenge,
But you're very good about that.
Speaking to Amma.
And I don't know why it's this way for you,
Sweetie.
Why you have to go through this.
You know,
It's.
.
.
It breaks my heart,
Really.
You know,
For you.
Not in a pitting way,
Just with Real compassion,
Sweetie.
Real,
Real compassion.
That's what I feel for you.
Just total Compassion and,
You know,
Privacy that like even in my place,
Which is,
I don't know how many apartments are in that I guess there's like maybe 50 or 60 apartments,
Four stories.
Um,
I do my chores at odd odd times,
So I won't bump into anybody.
You know,
No really.
I do that.
I go down,
Like,
I dump my garbage at night,
You know,
Because I don't want like kind of a silly conversation.
And sometimes I just don't want to see another person.
And I think some of this is just normal,
Sweetie.
What you feel like is,
Some of it's just what anybody feels,
You know?
You find that hard to believe.
I feel obligated to spend time and I want so much to be a part of my family.
Doesn't It's like trying to fit a square bumbling peg into a round hole.
Is exactly how it feels.
Well,
I know that this has been bothering you like you know,
A thorn in your side,
An uncomfortable thorn in your side for some time since I've known you.
And.
I know you keep going back to it and it seems impossible and all I'd say to you is a bigger reason why you're going through this,
And even if you don't feel like it's being solved.
On a bigger level,
Just going through this,
Laura,
Is solving it.
Just you experiencing this is solving it.
You see,
In a big way,
The bigger story.
Something important is being solved by you,
Laura,
Having this experience.
And having difficulty transcending.
Like,
You know,
Coming to peace about neighbors and everything.
The struggle to stop fighting everything.
There's a reason for it.
That's it.
And made that bigger reason.
Dawn on you.
Amma,
May the universe communicate this to you,
At least to your body.
Even if your mind doesn't get it.
To just bring more peace to your body.
And,
You know,
Someone like you,
You know,
Laura,
I mean,
I don't know if you let yourself watch movies and distract yourself.
My feeling is it would be so okay for you to do that.
You don't have to pray every moment.
You can distract yourself from all this,
Please.
I understand you've got a hemp thing that makes it hard to Transcend.
Whatever you can do to get through your days is okay.
But that's where the jury comes in.
It's like you wake up and let's do this again.
Okay.
About life,
That you have to live another day or,
Right?
Yeah.
Well.
.
.
You're just in this experience and there's a much bigger reason for it all,
Even though it seems unsolvable at this level.
Right.
Think of it like that you're putting money in a big spiritual bank and at some point you're going to get it back with colossal interest.
See ya!
Yes,
Some things are just tough.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Okay.
Blessings.
Mitchie,
You are lost in thought.
What are you thinking right now?
Spill.
Just speak it.
I was very touched by Laura's story and I was feeling very empathetic with her.
And at the same time,
I was questioning If I have a question,
I was questioning myself.
And I wanted to talk about my weaknesses.
Do it.
Come forward.
Because you were talking about we all want to come to truth and I think this is one of my strengths that I really want to go this way.
But most of the time I'm so less brave and so less,
I don't know how to describe.
I'm unsure how to do it and the last weeks I was so trapped in my old patterns and this whole thing of rigidity and fightiness came back.
And in my daily life,
Sometimes I can't figure out if it's fightiness or if it's telling them what my needs are.
And I think there is a very small line between it.
Because I have my needs.
And I'm not really sure how to communicate them.
And I'm always trying to.
To see a problem.
I'm extremely problem orientated and not in a good way.
I'm so much seeing a problem but there is nothing.
Or there's not really a problem.
I just have to communicate better.
Then it maybe would be solved directly or much more easier than I do it.
Yeah,
And when you wrote to me two hours ago about this honesty thing,
I was kind of shocked because I didn't see it.
But I can feel it.
I have no examples for it,
But I can feel the energy behind it.
Okay,
So that is it you guys.
Mitchie!
Felt it.
She could feel the truth of what I said.
It doesn't matter if our heads don't get it.
This is what I want to talk to you about.
We evolve through our bodies.
Like pay attention to your body.
If something feels true,
Then it's like.
.
.
Build your house.
You see,
Sweetie,
Mitchie,
Your problem is self-acceptance.
Like there's part of you that just feels that you cannot.
Yeah like but it's verboten okay so that is where you need to work you could,
You know,
You need to work more at that face,
Face it on a deeper level,
You get caught in more superficial struggles.
But the really the issue is self acceptance,
Sweetie.
Because if you accepted yourself more,
It would be easy for you to speak up of your needs.
You would just.
State your case.
Your words with a power.
Yeah,
You're totally right.
I'm so much avoiding things.
I'm always stepping backwards if there is a small conflict or not a reaction.
Yes,
That's why I said to you,
Be honest with me because I could feel you stepping back.
And kind of curating your response,
Like rather than just being very direct with me.
Like I am so direct with you guys,
Be direct with me.
Okay,
It's that.
We all feel the truth inside.
It's whether you want to stand there or not.
This is what Prama Sutta did.
I stood with my truth.
It was just,
I went into it and I lived my life from there.
OK,
Good.
OK,
Good.
And,
You know,
It's kind of take what comes.
Mitchie,
I mean,
The really good news is you're just in growing pains.
Do you understand?
Because you're your dreams you know the dreaming of the noble being noble in your dreams and everything that will percolate in this is what's percolating in this is why you're feeling a little antsy because there's this deep change going on underneath And your ego's going,
Oh my goodness.
It's loudly screaming.
Totally.
So.
That is what's going on.
That is your state.
And it's kind of like,
Watch it.
From this larger.
Acceptance of your process.
It's going to be like that for you,
Sweetie.
There's.
.
.
You guys,
You're all wanting to go through the doorway into being witnesses of yourself,
Okay?
This is the issue.
And what you're trying to do,
You're going halfway through the door.
And at the same time,
Your ego is trying to stay in control.
And do a phony.
Going through the door.
And Premasuddha is going,
Like,
That won't work.
You have to go through the door.
You experience.
That your.
And I'll see you again,
You guys.
You experience that you are a wounded child walking around in adult form,
And you put your arms around her.
And you watch how she does the same thing over and over again.
And you love her.
And,
You know,
Correct as best you can.
It is a bumbling,
Wobbly process until you learn how to walk.
And that's what you guys are in.
And this is part of why I feel like,
You know,
There's this change of direction and just hold on and keep coming till you get it.
Because once you get.
.
.
Learning how to witness it's much much easier it is much harder at the beginning stages where you're trying to figure out the journey and love yourself and everything and it's all like You know,
At the beginning stages,
You know,
We think,
Oh,
It's going to be full of grace and honey.
And then we keep and we go,
Wow,
Where's the grace and honey?
I thought I had it aced.
Well,
No,
You don't.
It takes a surrender.
I surrender.
Into yourself,
Into a surrender to the universe,
To Amma,
To your souls.
And this is what you guys are gagging on.
Virtually all of you.
And it's not a sin.
This is where you're,
To me,
You're bumbling idiots,
Really.
And I say this with great respect.
It's like,
Because Prima Suda was a bumbling idiot.
It's okay.
We're fools,
You guys,
But you just keep going.
And the divine comes into you.
That's how it works.
Yeah,
So Michi,
I know the loneliness.
I intuit the loneliness that you feel underneath.
You know.
Premasutha had a lot of issues with this feelings of separation underneath.
And sometimes when they're clearing,
They intensify.
And it's really uncomfortable.
Is to have to keep going.
No.
How do you feel right now?
Really,
Really honest.
There was a strength coming inside of me when you were talking.
And I got this image of my whole world as a globe.
And I have this like,
I don't know the English word,
Hammer.
I don't know how to say it.
And I know I have to do it.
I have to slam my whole world.
I'm shivering.
I know I have to do it.
On the point to do it,
But I'm not quite ready.
Okay,
Okay,
Good.
And maybe I want you to contemplate that maybe there is a little bit of what Premasiddha pointed out with Kalidas about you doing it.
Okay?
It's like give the globe to Amma.
Okay,
How does that feel?
Honestly,
Tell me.
Honestly,
How does that make you feel when I say that?
I remembered your words in the call when you told me that I have to take responsibility for my own spiritual path.
Okay.
You see,
This is where you guys get mixed up when I say responsibility.
I am not talking about your ego trying to control it.
This is where you guys get mixed up.
You hear responsibility as that you have to do something.
And when I talk about responsibility,
I'm talking about You wake up to that you are a soul in human form.
You are incapable of solving your life.
And all you can do is be responsible to the inner guidance you get.
Step-by-step and walk forward following that guidance without an agenda of your own.
Okay,
This is the toddlers learning how to walk.
Like,
Toddlers,
They know they can't handle life,
That they need their parents,
But they know that they can stand up and walk.
It's like you can stand up and walk with the identity of that you are a divine being waking up and to follow your guidance.
That it's being responsible to the alma within you.
I know what you mean.
I think it was always doing it in the outside and I have to do it.
I have to do it and take an action and not to turn inside and put it in front of Amma's feet.
Yeah,
You guys.
This whole process is helping you to turn inside.
Remember,
I'll say it for the time,
Gabriel appeared to me,
14 feet,
Enormous,
Huge,
Filled my room as I was speaking to you and said,
Tell them to turn inside.
That's it.
Remember,
You know,
Alma and your inner Amma.
You know,
Our inner almas are doing this for us.
You guys,
You see,
It is impossible to avoid some discomfiture in the spiritual journey.
It's very uncomfortable.
Sometimes.
Yeah.
But then we have these breakthroughs.
You know,
Mitchie,
You are a noble soul.
It's just that this this discomfiture with yourself,
You know,
But this is what we're like.
You know,
Especially women,
Really.
You guys,
I really,
I can't communicate to you.
How far?
Off we are.
Just were so off.
And that's our normal.
Right.
I can imagine,
Yeah.
Okay,
Good,
Because I heard you say underneath,
I heard you say,
I can heal.
It's beautiful.
You see,
Guys,
It's not you.
It's your conditioning.
It's like,
Look at our culture.
We're killing ourselves.
Were our foods poisoned,
You know?
You know,
Here in the US,
You know,
If you want to have a baby,
It's like $20,
000.
Yeah,
It's just,
It's crazy.
If you understand we're in a crazy world and you're wishing to return to sanity.
Okay,
It's interesting,
There is a loss of attention right there.
I want to say it again for some of you were.
Like all kids.
We are in a situation of a loss of insanity and we are returning to sanity.
And that's what it feels like,
You guys,
When you You know,
When I say take responsibility,
It's like take responsibility.
Live your life.
From the point of view that you are a divine being and that's who you're responsible to.
When we do that,
There's this incredible feeling.
Of a return to grace,
A return home,
A return to sanity.
A return to humanity.
And you guys,
This is why your struggles,
It's so strongly imprinted in this world.
It's everywhere.
In fact,
It's getting worse.
But the good thing about it getting worse is,
As Amma says,
There are more saints in North America than there have ever been.
You know the worse it gets the more some of us go this just isn't worth the game and we decide to wake up.
That's it.
That's it.
There's movement on really,
Really deep levels here with you guys.
Let's see.
That's it.
And there's kind of an energetic protection around you,
Around your new growth.
Right.
And,
You know.
We get these breakthroughs into a deeper understanding.
And the journey's very,
Very humbling,
Like I say to you.
You've no idea what Amma put me through.
So you hear this like,
Well,
Yeah,
That's her.
That happened to her.
But I'm telling you,
It's exactly what the journey's like.
It's going to happen to you.
It's either for me or Amma or some other teacher.
You will get humbled.
Or if there's no teacher,
Life will do it for you.
And the other choice is just that we all go extinct and the universe just goes well.
The humanity,
Well,
You know,
Back to the drawing board for a new species,
You know,
Really.
This is the truth of things,
You guys,
And that's what's freeing about it,
You guys.
There's nothing to lose.
I said,
This work is far deeper than you guys have any,
Any,
Any idea.
Good and you're all okay just the way you are.
There's no criticism.
This is just the journey.
I'm just teaching you how to walk.
And some of you think you're in wheelchairs,
And you're not.
And come out of them,
Really.
Yeah.
That's it.
When I talk,
You know,
You guys,
This work,
Please do not underestimate how subtle it is.
And Amma has us all.
You know,
When it comes,
It is a big relief to know that you're not responsible in a ego way,
That you're not in control of your lives.
That all you can do is keep surrendering to guidance,
Following guidance.
Doing your best.
Giving over difficulties.
There's a tremendous freedom of it.
Christ said,
Except as ye become as little children,
You can't enter the kingdom of heaven,
You see.
I mean,
If you don't do this,
You're always in dreary eco-land trying to evolve and failing.
And your ego getting bigger.
I mean,
Who looks that good?
Yeah.
You're very dear.
Some of you are.
You know,
You're The pride thing is stronger than you want to see,
But that's okay.
I mean,
I get it.
You know,
I was the pot color.
I can't call the kettle black.
I was such a black pot.
I can't call the kettle black.
I know all about pride.
I know all about this.
It's okay,
It's healable.
Okay,
Somebody else got Mitchie,
Have you finished?
Is there anything?
Yeah,
Yeah.
I feel very grounded.
Thank you.
Okay,
Good.
Okay,
Good.
And I want you to you rely on me to move you through things a lot.
That's okay.
But I'm wanting you to like do that grounding exercises and see what you can do for yourself.
Yeah.
Because.
I won't allow you to keep holding on to me and,
You know,
Like,
I won't allow you to keep,
You know,
Taking me through all these challenges.
I love watching you.
Yeah.
And I know that you're very equipped,
So just do your best.
And you guys,
I'm a good friend of all of you guys.
Like,
You know,
Really,
You're my beloved.
Thank you.
The other thing I want to say is this emotional work,
You know,
I don't know anybody who does it like it is the very,
Very feminine.
Work,
It's very practical to teach you how to do it.
And this is not common.
At all.
Yeah.
But it's,
I mean,
There's so many people walking around saying spiritual things and just so lodged in their heads.
Not getting the deeper journey at all.
What's the point of that?
Yeah,
It is this dissing of the feminine.
That's why we don't have more emotional training and more practical help for the journey.
You see,
Because we're so lopsided to the masculine,
Which is,
It's more conditional love.
It's like you have to do this to achieve this.
You have to meditate for 50 years and then you know a woman gives birth.
She loves.
This is This is This is the heart of it.
It's the whole reason why there's this training to do 50 years of meditation,
To learn how to love.
This is just training.
Learn how to love yourselves.
Learn how to understand yourself.
And love yourselves.
You can,
If you keep going,
You can achieve self-realization.
Without self-awareness,
You never will.
You never will,
Because you'll never be able to decode how your ego tricks you.
You'll always just be fooled by your ego again and again and again.
So it's kind of like,
Do you want your pride?
And be kept being fooled by your ego or do you want to wake up?
This is where I say it's a bit the law of the jungle.
It's like,
Do you want it or not?
And it's the law of the jungle because the ego will so try to trick you.
You have no idea.
The tricks.
And you have to be willing to love deeply enough to see them.
And still honor yourself.
You know,
To see where your ego caught you and still love yourself.
I'm getting a feeling of Ascension,
Of breaking free in Ascension.
Yay.
J Ma.
J Ma.
Anyway.
Who else would like to come forward?
Richard,
Is there anything you want to say?
Hello,
Pranasuram.
Um.
.
.
Yeah,
I'm not sure what I want to say or what I can say,
But I've been really,
Really lost the last days.
Um.
.
.
Yeah I'm not quite comfortable to speak in the group about it in detail.
Yeah,
No,
That's okay.
It's good just to say this just good to know that.
I saw your discomfiture.
Responded You know,
And I understand not wanting to speak,
But.
It's like you're very precious the way you are,
Richard.
There's lots to learn,
But you're very precious as you are.
All of you guys,
You're very precious as you are.
That's what you're saying.
I'm getting,
This is what I'm scared of you saying.
Yeah,
It's remember we talked about the fear of not being good enough.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So you're very precious and at the same time,
You guys,
The truth of it is you're scared to actually feel how precious and how loved you are.
That's what you're scared of.
But it will seem that you're scared of not.
Being.
Good enough.
Because this is how the ego works.
It gets it absolutely backwards.
It will tell you one thing,
But the truth is the opposite.
Right.
This is what you're scared of.
It's interesting because I'm seeing you like a prisoner.
Like in jail and you're going like how could I be valuable when I'm a prisoner in jail.
That I've done something terrible.
And you haven't,
You guys.
You see,
This is why the ego is so tricky.
The ego will tell you that you've done something terrible because It doesn't want you to know that you're infinite.
Please get it.
It's trying to hide from you that you are immortal,
Omniscient.
All-powerful,
All-knowing.
The ego is doing,
You know,
If you look up at the sky,
You can.
You can use your finger to kind of hide the sun.
You know,
It will look like it blocks out the sun.
So this is like the ego.
Trying to block out the love of your soul.
But it's just a finger.
It's nothing as powerful as that sun is.
The sun is a powerful thing.
Your souls are the powerful thing.
The ego's just working really hard that you don't see this.
And Sonic drills us with all our failures and inadequacies,
And it is never stronger.
Than just before a leap into truth.
The ego will drown us in feelings of being inadequate and that we're just so deeply flawed and we're never going to get anywhere.
And often everybody around us will be upset with us too.
That is what a shift is like.
You're all heroes,
You see.
This is it.
I mean,
You're heroes to even contemplate doing this.
There was a member of the Satsang who was.
.
.
He had an operation and everybody in his family wasn't available.
At that time to bring him home from the hospital.
I mean,
It was a total experience of abandonment.
This is what can happen just before somebody moves into truth.
It's like it becomes a glaringly obvious metaphor.
You get a total experience of being abandoned.
That's it.
And you just keep swimming.
You know,
I'm going to talk about swimming.
Swimming.
You just swim through all the emotional blah,
Blah,
Blah,
And you keep swimming to a new,
Bigger understanding,
A bigger understanding.
To a new ground,
New ground I used to imagine.
An island coming up out of the ocean,
That I was swimming there,
Swimming to a new understanding.
You see,
You guys,
The spiritual journey cannot be domesticated.
It is wild.
Because the ego wants to keep power.
And you think of any despot.
And what he does to keep power.
Same with the ego.
And you guys,
I'm talking about you.
And your personal experience here when I say that.
This experience that I'm talking about is not separate from you.
About what the ego does.
It is in your experience if you open your eyes and see it.
And when you see it more,
You'll learn not to buy into it,
And you'll learn how to evolve.
That's it.
I am seeing you guys.
Raising in understanding.
Okay,
I'm seeing you like going up.
So remember,
It's not on your shoulders.
Amma is running the show.
Your soul's running the show.
All you can do is really have a strong intent.
Alma talks about the importance of staying alert.
And you just go forward.
And something beyond you takes care of the outcome.
But if you're sincere,
You will make progress.
You know,
Seekers are not happy by and large,
Really.
You know,
We come into periods of light and peace.
And then,
You know,
There's the next obstacle.
But a normal asleep person.
Is never happy,
Really.
They can have a phony happiness thinking that they have a house,
Say,
So that they're happy.
I'm happy I have a house.
You know,
But that stuff disappears very quickly.
And you get your deathbed and you see you couldn't,
You didn't make any progress.
You know,
That you weren't true to yourself,
That you didn't,
You weren't responsible to your soul.
Who is a waste.
And I'll tell you guys,
It's really crushing when that happens.
There's no escape.
You just get like,
You feel like you're being judged by the judge and jury.
That's what a wasted life feels like on that.
Deathbed with no escape.
So when the ego dies,
You guys,
We feel like this too.
We will get a feeling of we're being judged by judge and journey.
There's no escape.
We're a miserable sinner.
We've screwed up.
It's never going to get better.
Just the ego dying.
There's a wild love.
It's like a wild loving grace that's wanting to reach all of your bodies.
And you've been walling it off and you didn't even know.
Self-forgiveness for having walled it off.
Self-forgiveness for having stayed deaf and dumb and blind.
And as soon as you do that,
The sun comes out.
And you see nothing,
There was no mistake,
Nothing was lost,
It's all okay.
This is what I want to reassure you guys about.
Remember,
There's something working on your behalf that is far.
More powerful than you have any idea of.
There's something magical and loving.
Guiding you every step.
Self-realization,
You guys,
Is realizing how loved you are.
You just realize how loved you are.
And there's no problem.
And then you turn around and try to help other people get that.
And they go,
Not possible.
No,
I'm so bad.
I'm so,
I do this,
This.
The world's so terrible.
Just hold them.
Just hold them,
Love them.
Let me get through to you guys.
You know,
There's,
I've felt this before sometimes,
That there's the levels of anger that you carry against yourselves,
Really.
And when I'm talking to you,
I feel this kind of.
It's like a cellular wall of anger.
Even.
Communicating all this to you.
It's like,
Your egos are going,
Not allowed,
Don't want to hear this.
Okay,
But the important thing is you come,
You see,
Because you come.
This wall of anger that you've been carrying with you.
Against yourself will melt.
Can't help it.
It will melt.
Part of it,
A lot of it,
Is the training in the patriarchy that this level of a kind of female.
Face of God is not allowed.
But at the same time,
All of you know that you need it.
Because we do need it so badly.
We so need Amma's embrace.
We so need this higher emotional IQ and understanding how the spiritual journey works emotionally.
Yeah,
And you can accept that.
OK,
That's good.
Okay,
You guys accepted that.
Okay,
There was a level that you all move through a level of anger.
And remember,
Premasuddha's map of reality,
His experience,
Is way beyond anything you guys could possibly understand right now.
Remember that.
You're not going to be able to understand it.
Till you go higher.
When you go higher,
More of it will become clear.
It's harder towards the beginning because there's great insecurity.
You don't have that much proof.
I'm getting a message from.
The creator.
Like I'd say it's all wrong,
But I just.
I'll call it the creator thing.
I'm incredible.
Premasuddha is incredibly lucky.
To be able to.
Share this knowledge,
To be able to have come to this knowledge and then be able to share it with other interested people.
Yeah,
That I am really blessed and lucky.
Right,
It's true.
That's true.
I feel this.
Julie,
I'm so blessed that you guys are interested because otherwise I'd just be walking around with all this going.
What do I do with all this?
Really?
Yeah,
That's good.
And I can feel the Creator saying,
You know,
Just keep going and comprehension will gradually dawn within.
You guys,
It dawns within us.
It will dawn within you at a level of your body.
Please get this.
Your head won't get it.
Your body will get it,
And as a result of that,
Your head will get it,
Like a woman gives birth.
And her head becomes a mother.
She has a mother's head then.
It's the same principle.
You let the love into your body.
Your head will get it.
That's it.
Yeah.
And I'm feeling the Creator just wrapping you all in this,
All of us,
In this huge embrace.
Last call for any comment or question.
You know,
Alma says she hears every prayer and sees every tear.
I want to make a comment.
Yeah,
Richard.
I could really feel raising trust in my chest.
As you were talking.
And I also know that there's similar hints in my dreams which give me trust.
For the future.
Good.
Good.
Good,
Richard.
Yeah it's a it is like that we get it with our intuition and our bodies and then Our heads get it.
After.
So I feel like there's this Oh,
I almost don't want to put words in my ear,
But I just say I honor you,
Richard,
And I honor Yes.
You're noticing this.
And your ability to your perceptual ability to get what I'm talking about.
Yeah.
Because it's very subtle,
It's very feminine.
Yeah.
Yeah,
Thank you.
It's lovely.
Yeah.
See ya.
You guys,
I just want to also say like on a human level,
Remember when I started satsangs,
I mean some of you have been like four years ago,
I had such difficulty expressing myself.
The early tapes are full of um,
Uh,
Uh,
Mm,
Uh,
All through it.
And,
And it was like,
I was like,
How do I speak about this?
How do I bring this forward?
And I just bumbled into it.
I just followed the guidance to get the satsangs,
And they've become clearer and more powerful over time.
And this is Pramasutra's proof,
And this is the kind of proof you have access in your lives.
To look.
At the lived results.
And to understand that it's as bumbling for Premasuddha as it is for you.
But I have way more peace.
Yeah.
But we're all in this together.
And work.
Humanity's making this new leap.
Nobody's done this before.
So growing pains are inevitable and it's just so great that you guys are stepping up.
Because really,
If more people don't do this,
We will blow ourselves up.
That is,
You know,
I remember Amma saying,
Several years ago that there weren't enough people waking up.
I shouldn't say that we blow ourselves up.
That's what I think.
You know,
That's Premasutha's tape.
We have to do it.
We either wake up or we'll blow ourselves up and the universe will try again.
Right,
Now the good news is I don't think we're gonna blow ourselves up,
So.
And I used to.
But I don't think that anymore.
Yeah,
And you guys are.
Really,
You're stepping forward beautifully.
Can I just say this?
Please receive this.
It's beautiful what you're doing.
All of you.
There's no air.
It's a wild journey.
Last call for any comments,
Questions.
She hates you.
Sometimes I look at you and it's just so dear,
I can't stand it.
Bless your dear hearts,
You guys.
