There is a version of you that you haven't met yet and I know when you're in the thick of it,
When the weight of it all just feels too heavy and when the ache of what you've been through is louder than anything else,
It's hard to imagine that she even exists.
It's hard to believe that there could be a version of you who's made it through the heartbreak,
The grief,
The loss,
The nights that felt endless,
But she is there and she does exist.
Not in some faraway perfect version of your life,
Not untouched or unaffected by everything that you've been through.
No.
She is who she is because of it.
Because of every single moment that cracked her open.
Every single moment that left her wondering if she would ever be okay again.
She is stronger not because she didn't break but because she did.
Because she shattered all the places life hit the hardest and somehow in the quiet unseen moments she pieced herself back together.
She's softer too.
Not weak but soft in the way that only someone who has truly healed can be.
Soft because she no longer carries the need to protect herself from everything.
Soft because she's learned that her strength was never in building walls,
It was in opening her heart again,
Even after it was broken.
She's wiser because she's lived it.
Because she's sat in the dark.
Because she's met every part of herself.
The scared parts,
The angry parts,
The parts that made her feel unworthy and she stayed.
She learned that survival wasn't the finish line.
That healing is what came next.
And maybe right now you can't feel her yet.
Maybe right now you're still in the part that feels like breaking.
Still in the part where the ache is too loud,
Where the in-between feels endless.
And where you're questioning if you'll ever be okay again.
And I want you to know that's okay.
You don't have to rush this.
You don't have to force yourself to be somewhere you're not just to prove your healing.
You don't have to wear the mask of I'm fine when every part of you is still hurting.
You are allowed to be right here.
You are allowed to feel the grief,
The loss,
The anger,
The confusion.
You are allowed to wake up some days feeling strong and other days wondering how you'll make it through the day.
This is the in-between.
This is the gray area.
The sacred,
Messy,
Beautiful middle where healing is quietly unfolding even when you can't see it.
But please hold on to this truth.
There is a version of you who has made it through.
And she's not someone separate from you.
She's already within you.
Growing stronger with every breath you take.
Growing louder with every small act of courage you don't even realize you're making.
Every time you get out of bed when it feels impossible.
Every time you choose softness when anger would be easier.
Every single time you pick yourself up even when you're shaking,
Even when you're hurting.
She is there and she is waiting for you.
Not with judgment,
Not with pressure but with the deepest most unconditional love there is.
Because she remembers what it felt like to be you right now.
She remembers the heaviness,
The doubt,
The fear that it might never get better.
And one day,
Maybe sooner than you think,
You will wake up and realize you are her.
Not because you forced it,
Not because you rushed it,
But because healing found you in these small quiet moments that you didn't even notice.
In the way that you softened your shoulders.
In the way that you let yourself cry without shame.
In the way you forgave yourself for simply being human.
Healing found you in every exhale,
In every moment you choose to stay,
Even when leaving would have been easier.
And when that day does come,
When you realize you've become her,
You will look back and see that you were never as lost as you felt.
That you were never as broken as you believed.
That you were always becoming.
You were always coming home to yourself.
So please hold on and keep going.
You're not behind.
You're not failing.
You're not stuck.
You're becoming.
You're unfolding.
You're healing.
And more than anything,
You're coming home to yourself again.
