Meditation To Stop Seeking External Validation

As social beings, many of us look to the reactions and perceptions of others to define our self-worth. While this is a natural survival mechanism, it can lead to a life that doesn't feel like our own or a perpetual feeling of discontent with ourselves. This guided meditation is designed to help you take back control by calling back your energy, so you can decide how you feel today, regardless of how others appear to see you.

Music Credit: Daria, QuietPhase

Transcript

So go ahead and get comfortable. You can sit or lie down, Whatever feels most natural to you. And just begin by gently closing your eyes or softening their gaze. Take a slow breath in through your nose and exhale out through your mouth. Again, A slow inhale and a longer exhale. Let your body begin to settle without forcing anything. And begin to notice where in your body you tend to feel things the most. Maybe it's your chest, Your stomach, Your head. And whatever you notice, Just acknowledge it. There's no need to change it. Now, From this place, Notice which of these thoughts sound or feel familiar to you. Why aren't they responding? Did I do something wrong? Why did they react like that? Are they annoyed with me? Did I sound smart enough? Is this too much to post? And now notice what hearing these words, What remembering these thoughts feels like. There may be a subtle tension, That pull, That sense that something inside of you is holding on, Waiting to hear from someone else so you can decide how you feel. And just observe that feeling as if you're watching it from a small distance. Because what you're seeing is not who you are. It's something your mind learned to do. At some point, Your system learned, I am safe when I am chosen. I am okay when I am validated. And that made sense then. But you're not there anymore. So now we're going to gently introduce your system to a new experience. Bring your awareness back to your breath. And imagine with every inhale, You're gathering your energy back from other people, From expectations, From waiting. And with every exhale, You return that energy to yourself. Inhale, Calling your energy back. Exhale, Settling into yourself. Now imagine they're standing right in front of you. It's the most steady, Grounded version of you. Notice what they look like. Notice what they're doing. They aren't checking their phone or waiting to be chosen. Notice the energy around them, How it feels to be in their present, And how they feel anchored, Certain, Whole. Notice how they hold themselves, The way that they breathe, The way that they exist, Without needing anything else. Allow the inside of them to feel okay. And gently step into their body as if you're trying them on. And feel what it's like to be in a body that is not waiting, A body that knows, I'm already okay, I'm already enough. While staying rooted in this place, In this confidence, And in this quiet certainty, In this steady and grounded version of you. Let's go back to those thoughts. Why aren't they responding? Did I do something wrong? Why did they react like that? Are they annoyed with me? Did I sound smart enough? Is this too much to post? And notice nothing in you shifts, Because your sense of self is not tied to the outcome. Let this land in your body. You can desire connection without depending on it. You can enjoy attention without needing it to feel whole. And repeat quietly to yourself now, I am not defined by someone's response. I remain steady on my own. Only I can make myself feel safe. Let that settle, Not just as words, But as feelings. And now slowly begin to return. One bringing awareness back to the other. One bringing awareness back to your breath. Two, Wiggling your fingers and your toes. Three, Bringing the same awareness to the space around you. Four, Feeling energy flowing through your body. And five, Opening your eyes to a more grounded and secure version of you.