Hello dear one,
I'd like you to hear something really important.
Every part of you is welcome here,
Exactly as you are.
There is nothing you need to hide.
You're not here to edit,
Control or fix yourself.
You are here to be you as you are.
So feel your breath now.
Just notice it.
Feel that movement.
The gentle rhythm Bye.
And out.
You,
My friend,
Have struggled enough.
And if today feels heavy and you feel tired,
Perhaps distant from yourself and others,
Disconnected from life.
I am here to tell you that you are not failing.
You are not actually doing anything wrong.
You are in a very natural process that the body and mind expresses in order to protect you against any further overwhelm of anxiety,
Doubt,
Loss,
Grief,
And stress.
And this is very important.
My friend,
Depression isn't here to hurt you.
It really isn't.
In fact,
It's here to help you.
We've learned to perceive depression as our enemy.
An unwanted ogre.
Something to cast aside or fight and push through.
We believe we must shake it off.
Why can't I cope?
Why can't I get out of this?
Why am I so useless?
So the depression grows heavier like a weight within us.
We can't remember things,
Can't even string our thoughts together.
It becomes an involuntary shutting down.
And then we feel that awful hopelessness.
Powerless,
Trapped alone in it.
And here comes the guilt,
The shame and deep frustration.
And if any of this is true for you,
Dear one.
I want you to hear something very important.
You are not failing.
Depression isn't proof of weakness,
Nor is it proof that you are doing something or everything wrong.
No,
My friend,
No.
Depression is what naturally happens when we're carrying a load too heavy for us for too long.
This happens when too much pain has accumulated.
When loss has remained unspoken.
And stress and anxiety have lingered.
Our nervous system has spent too long trying hard to manage this load within us.
And it is too much for us,
Simply too much to carry.
For you are human,
Dear one.
You are not designed to carry such a load and stride forwards into more.
No.
Depression is your whole system seeking to protect you.
You're being held by this clever protection system in a place of safety until you turn towards yourself with kind eyes and kind thoughts.
This may sound woo-woo,
But it is the true key that fits the lock of the safety and holding system that depression is.
Depression is not here to hurt you,
My friend.
It really isn't.
And it is here to hold you until you are ready to go inwards with gentleness,
Curiosity and a little courage.
Not by thinking your way out.
This was never a job for your mind alone.
It is a job for your heart and your body.
For your willingness to turn towards yourself now.
And so today we pick up the golden key that opens this protection system that is called depression.
Because my friend,
It's time.
I'd like you just to notice your breath now.
Breath coming in and going out.
Gently now,
There it is.
Life breathing through you.
Choosing you.
A caring friend supporting you.
Let's take one deeper breath in together now.
Breathing in.
And release.
And as you do and you come back to your regular rhythm of breathing,
Just notice your face beginning to soften.
Your forehead,
Your eyes.
Your mouth Your jaw is unclenching.
Relaxing.
.
.
Your shoulders softening and releasing.
Your breath flowing in and out a gentle rhythm of calm and peace spreading now around you and through you letting go a little more into the spacious growing peace.
And feeling your chest,
Your belly and your arms all softening now.
Your pelvis is relaxing,
Supported by the surface below you.
Your legs and feet gratefully letting go into the peace.
And the calm.
And the breath flowing in and out of you,
Caring for you.
Gently and kindly.
You are being chosen here and now.
And this is important.
You.
Are important.
And breathe.
Let's now bring your attention to the part of you that feels exhausted.
The part that has been trying so hard.
Part that has been hidden far away,
Perhaps even from you.
The part that feels left behind while everyone else seems so easily to move forwards.
Just gently acknowledge this part,
No fixing or solving.
No judgement.
A gentle recognition ah yes you are here Let the following words quietly settle in now.
I am here now.
I am here.
I now know that I have been carrying too much alone.
I now know that I have been carrying too much alone.
You are safe here with me in this moment.
You are safe here with me in this moment.
My friend this part of you was never your enemy It's been protecting you.
Protection is not a weakness.
Protection is intelligence.
When a hand touches something hot,
It pulls away.
When a storm arrives,
Animals seek shelter.
When life becomes overwhelming,
We humans protect ourselves too.
Sometimes through anxiety,
Sometimes through numbness,
Sometimes through withdrawal.
In time,
These can become the safety-holding system that is depression.
They are evidence that something within us is trying to help us survive.
And while these protections may no longer service in the ways they once did.
They deserve our understanding and kindness.
And it is here in this moment,
Our protective parts gently soften,
Met by our own compassionate presence.
For you are not wrong.
You are not failing.
You have been overwhelmed and in pain.
So in this moment let's release the judgment.
Imagine that the exhausted part of you has been carrying a heavy backpack.
A backpack filled with worries,
Doubts,
Regrets and losses.
And many things that were never yours to begin with.
If it feels safe for you I'd like you to gently place a hand over your heart.
You are loosening the energetic buckle at the front of your heavy backpack.
Keep breathing.
Notice as the straps of the backpack ease of each shoulder.
Feel that relief as the straps slide off and your shoulders are free of the weight.
Just let the backpack fall away.
The air around you will carry it now.
You need not worry about this.
The universe knows exactly where to take it for healing.
You are now experiencing a beautiful pause.
And needed rest.
It's time to acknowledge that you are not the contents of the backpack.
You carried the backpack and it grew heavy.
Depression is the process that came to tell you all about the backpack.
That it's too heavy.
That you need something else in its place.
A gentle,
Living kindness.
A deep loving acceptance.
And there is something deeper here within you.
Kindly,
Gently choosing you to love as you are right now.
A presence within you loving you respectfully,
Fully.
And affirming all that you are.
And that presence has never left.
It cannot.
For it is life itself.
And it is here to remind you of who you really are.
You,
Dear one,
Are important.
You matter.
You are important to the infinite loving presence that is the foundation within you.
Living and loving you beneath all that you've been carrying.
Remembering to breathe.
I'm going to share some words with you now.
You do not need to consciously accept them.
In fact,
You may actively disagree with some.
And that's okay,
Because these words are going to settle where they need to anyway.
They know exactly where to go and what to do.
My experience of depression does not mean that I am failing.
My experience of depression does not mean that I am failing.
Depression has been here to free me.
Depression has been here to free me.
I am allowing myself to understand now.
I am allowing myself to understand now.
Self-acceptance is loving wisdom.
Self-acceptance is deep loving wisdom.
My clever mind and body needed to protect me.
My clever mind and body needed to protect me.
I can meet myself with kindness now.
I do meet myself with kindness now.
I meet myself with understanding and compassion.
I meet myself with understanding and compassion.
I offer myself patience as I heal.
I offer myself patience as I heal.
Keep breathing.
And as you breathe notice even the smallest softening inside.
It doesn't have to be certainty.
Just a small allowing.
A little space.
Feeling the rhythm of your breath moving through you because life is choosing you.
And something within you is feeling this.
Quietly,
Softly.
With gentle patience.
You do not need to force yourself.
You do not need to know how.
You only need to leave a little space for the natural occurrence of life's flow within.
For pure life is very wise.
And your body is wise and knows exactly what to do.
And breathe.
Notice that each breath is an entirely new breath.
It is not the one before,
It's its own breath,
A brand new breath.
And this breath is within you.
Here.
Now.
And this is life in you,
Renewed every moment.
And it is very good.
Your cup is filling.
That which is needed has arrived.
And it is for you,
Dear one,
For you.
I'd like you to take a moment to thank yourself.
You bravely showed up for yourself today.
You stayed.
You allowed this space for you.
And that matters.
Every moment of self-care and self-acceptance is the softening,
Is the golden key to earning.
Every moment of self-compassion has power.
Every time you choose you with kindness,
You soften.
Your real self gently rises effortlessly.
This is the truth of real healing.
One gentle act or thought towards yourself is a miracle in action.
It softens the hesitant,
Tired and hurting heart.
Kindly,
Safely.
Judgment softens and your mind calms.
It is a path of self-respect,
My friend.
Inviting deeper natural healing to rise up within.
For this dear one is the way.
Gently now let us bring our meditation to a close.
You may gently drift into calm sleep now.
Or perhaps become aware of the space around you.
Noticing again the surface beneath you.
Feel the air all around you.
Wiggle your fingers and toes.
Perhaps you'd like a gentle stretch.
And when you are ready,
Opening your eyes.
Always remember my friend,
Depression is not a failing.
It is your clever mind and body protecting you.
This chapter is for you to recognize that you needed gentle attention,
Compassion and understanding.
Depression was caring for you,
Like a concerned and kind friend.
And you have given yourself the gift of acceptance and understanding today.
A beautiful,
Powerful act of self-care and deep healing.
Well done my friend,
Well done.
And please come back any time to remember you are not failing.
You have simply been self-protecting.
And until next time,
Blessings on you my friend.
