The No-Willpower Approach To Breaking Any Habit

In this first video, Dr. Amy discusses the fact that all habits are essentially the same. We aren’t looking at how habits show up in the world, but what’s behind them. In this way, substance-related habits (food, alcohol, etc.), behavioral habits (e.g., internet addiction, shopping, gambling, etc.) and even thought and feeling habits (like worry, compulsions, insecurity) are the same. They come to life and operate in the same way, so everything we’ll explore here applies to any and all habits you might have. Amy will also talk about why our brain loves habits, and how habits get started and take root. It’s very good news! Coming to understand the function of habits allows you to see the wisdom in them, and it helps to clear up the misunderstandings that leave us feeling powerless around them.

Humans feel stuff. We experience discomfort. We feel heavy, tight emotions. We feel far from “home” at times. Of course all of that is perfectly normal, but when we misunderstand those feelings–when we think those feelings are meaningful, that they reflect our true selves, or that we need to do something to change our feelings–things can go south quickly. You are not your experience. You are the habit-free, peaceful consciousness within which experience rises and falls. Seeing that begins to leave all experience looking very different.

In this video, we’ll look at what feelings truly are: energy + thought (story). If we didn’t fear and resist feelings, would we even have habits? We come to not fear our experience by understanding it. When we see thought and feeling for what they are, they are far less scary.

Habits live in your ever-changing psychology. They are not inherently meaningful and they have nothing to do with who you are. They also don’t need you to change them. Psychological experience is always changing. You couldn’t stop it if you tried! Knowing that you are not your experience, fearing it less, and seeing that it’s always changing on its own, allows you to enjoy the change that’s already always taking place.