Tup and Stern and the Skipping Rope Scandal Toppenstern Mystery.
Written by S.
D.
Hudson Performed by Stephanie Poppins.
Chapter 4 It was early morning and Tuppence Stern stood waiting for her best friend Bart,
Who was on his way from the Home Economics Department.
Where he'd been weighing out ingredients for Devil's Food Cake.
Rather fitting for a school now subject to the ultimate sin.
Murder.
Hal Toppins loved his warped sense of humour.
Gazing down the school drive,
She saw at its conclusion the gates remained latched with a heavy chain and old padlock.
No one was allowed to get in St.
Ethelburg's but Inspector Tryhard.
And Tuppence was now beginning to get cabin fever.
She focused on the mature trees to take her mind off it.
Tuppence loved the great outdoors.
Oaks and chestnuts planted decades ago,
Their canopies now meeting overhead to form a shaded tunnel of dappled light.
She checked the perimeter.
High stone walls topped with wrought iron railings kept everyone in who needed to be in and everyone out who needed to stay out.
Across the lawns a twisting footpath wound through,
Occasional cast-iron lampposts dotted along the way.
On the wide forecourt where she stood there was an old lichen-covered sundial.
The entrance to the main house and the teacher's block was behind her.
A heavy door under a stone archway was flanked by symmetrical windows and reached by stone steps,
Worn smooth in the middle of generations of tired teachers.
Tuppence side.
It had been a week since the murder and still they were no further forward.
Inspector Tryhard had been sniffing around asking her inappropriate questions like.
.
.
Do you have a map?
I'm lost in your eyes.
Martin Bonus,
Meanwhile,
Was asked,
Why don't you keep your skipping ropes locked up like a responsible head teacher should?
But in spite of these silly observations.
There was no progress.
Tryhard had no clue,
And he was obviously relying on the post-mortem report for his inspiration.
Which would if the county hospital's previous record was anything to go by.
Bee Weeks.
Tuppence didn't think she could endure one more day with Try Hard,
Let alone one more week.
But she had a plan.
Solve the murder for him and make him think it was all his doing.
That was what her little black book was for.
Dragging her bike out of the bush she'd left it in the week before,
She rescued the aforementioned item.
Having hidden it in the pocket under her basket the night she rescued her wine.
She felt a lot more secure.
This book held facts no one else knew.
And things being the way they were,
This was about as unsuspecting a place as she could think of to hide anything.
She must hide it.
There was a murderer about after all.
The school bell rang and there appeared Bart right on cue.
You ready for weed's wake-up call?
He chuckled as he appeared from the back of the building where the home economic unit was situated with the rest of the teaching block.
Are you wearing?
" smirked Tuppence.
Bart had a Walkman slung around his neck with his obligatory Oasis tape rattling around inside it.
Gotta get my kick somehow,
And an angry Mancunian seems a good place to start,
" he said.
Beats an avoidant headteacher,
I suppose,
" smirked Tuppence.
We have to do this thing.
Well,
It's a meeting and it's for staff,
Which we are,
So I'm guessing yes.
Tuppen's Grimmest.
With her unexpected free morning,
She wanted to escape to room 201 and read up on strangulation.
But now there was a last-minute staff meeting.
201 was the little room Martin Bonas had assigned to her for her new role of school confidante.
Set right in the corner of the top floor,
It was the perfect place for Tuppence to think when things got on top of her.
And her books always had the answers.
Every time.
What you got there anyhow?
" asked Bart,
Looking at her little black book.
It's where I've been keeping my notes.
Oh.
And what are you going to do with your bike?
It's broken,
Remember?
I'm well aware,
But I need it fixed in case I need an impromptu escape.
Escape?
Without me?
Sorry,
Wrong word.
I mean if I need to make an investigative visit without anyone knowing.
I'm going to ask Martin to help me pump up my tyres.
Is that a euphemism?
Tup and Shot bark and look over her pants.
Nay,
Bartholomew Bowman,
I don't know what you mean.
Then spinning on her heel,
She led the way across the gravel to the teacher's block entrance.
Glancing up at the portraits of those who had taught before them on the way up.
Tuppence thought how all the teachers look so serious in their gowns and mortarboards.
However much she tried,
She just couldn't be that person.
With her frilled blouses and hippie accessories,
She looked better suited to a rave from the early 90s.
Forever young,
People called her.
Was what gave her the edge,
She thought.
People always underestimated Tuppence Sturge.
Did you see that police logo on the laminate we'd pulled away in that day in assembly?
" she whispered before they reached the staffroom door.
Yeah!
But he's back.
I meant to say about that.
I thought it was just me.
See i told you you were observant said tuppence we'll make a very good team Inside the staff room,
The gossip had reached its peak.
Miss Pevensey,
The religious studies teacher,
Was proposing they all go to the chapel to repent their sins.
After all,
Malcolm Marshall had been naked.
It was playing on her mind,
She said.
Miss Luck,
The drama teacher,
Agreed.
He was strangled with red lights and spines,
Wasn't he?
How evil was that?
No,
Said Miss Trollope.
It was a red skipping rope.
And that is very suggestive.
She doggied her copy of a Jilly Cooper paperback.
Probably some sick game gone wrong.
I've been reading about something like that.
She added.
Tuppence rolled her eyes.
This was all she needed.
Tittle-tattle from a bunch of sex-starved women.
It's all nonsense,
" she interrupted.
He was missing his shirt,
That's all.
No suggestion of anything else.
Then she dropped herself into a battered armchair and balanced a mug of coffee and a croissant she'd stolen from the sixth-form kitchen on its arm.
You know what to do,
Don't you,
Tuppence?
Said an eager voice.
You've done this before.
Up and smiled.
As much as these women loved the gossip,
They knew they could count on her to set things straight.
All in a day's work,
I suppose,
For you,
" said another.
Just stay calm,
Girls.
That's the best I've got at the moment,
" said Tubbens.
The kids need us,
Remember?
Then the bell rang and quickly they went through the itinerary for the next day.
Before dispersing very happily weed-free.
That was a touch,
Beamed Bart.
Obviously licking her wounds,
After Martin had a go at her yesterday for neglecting her post,
Said Tubman smugly.
I must get back to room 201 and my books.
I've got to start somewhere.
According to my calculations,
There are only a limited number of people who could have physically committed the crime.
Well,
Keep me in the loop,
T.
I'm your Watson,
Didn't you say?
" said Bart.
But I don't know anything about medical stuff.
I'm a chef,
Remember?
It'll be fine,
" Tubman reassured him.
You'll be fine.
They made their way outside again and Bark looked out to the grounds.
But there's only so many places I can be at one time.
And now I gotta go.
Devil's food cake's a big ask and I got 15 kids to teach.
Okay,
But you've made it before,
Haven't you?
Yes,
But now it's got to be egg free.
They had no delivery.
K-pop tuppence.
You were supposed to be up to date with what was going on.
Oh,
Sorry,
Yes.
My mind's stuck in the PE department with skipping ropes at the moment.
We'll catch up later Bart,
Okay?
You bet!
I've got some questioning to do.
And as my sidekick,
You're one of the first I have to eliminate from my investigations.
Okie dokie,
I'll see you later then.
And Bart strode off,
Still dressed in his apron and chef's hat.
Tuppence smiled.
She'd make a sleuth sidekick out of him yet.
It was the afternoon and Tuppence finally felt like she was getting somewhere.
Having spent the morning in room 201 listing all her suspects,
She was ready to begin interrogations.
Not that she would be calling them that.
She would have to be very subtle about this.
Funny enough,
Teachers were one of the profession least likely to warm to the idea of being accused of murder.
Tuppence had a job to do.
She'd been in the village longer than the longest-serving policeman,
And being the mild-mannered person she was,
She knew every resident and their extended family's business.
Since divorcing Derek,
People liked telling her things.
They'd avoided her before.
Derek had that effect on people.
As the sun sank lower in the sky,
She met Bartholomew Bowman in the sunken gardens in the courtyard at the centre of the pupils' block.
Mmm,
Yummy!
" she exclaimed as she munched on Devil's food cake.
Did all the girls manage to make one?
Yep,
Then eat one just as quickly.
That's my girls,
Beamed Tuppence.
Sew.
All of them come from the village then?
" asked Bart,
Keen to know more about exactly who he was teaching.
Yeah,
Or they're related to someone they're in.
Uh-huh It's all part of the selection process here,
" said Tuppence.
As long as the fees are paid,
The parents trust Martin to do the right thing.
It's a very small,
Close-knit community like that.
Until someone gets hurt.
Yes,
But as it happens,
That's always someone outside of the community who comes in.
Always.
Oh Bart,
Don't look worried.
I know you've only been here a month.
Anyway,
It was Malcolm Marshall who paid the price this time,
So it won't be you.
Bart was finding it hard to feel reassured.
That really puts my mind at ease.
As they spoke,
A gaggle of chocolate-covered girls waved through the corridor windows.
They had been munching on their cakes all afternoon.
You think we worked in a Dickens novel the way they go on,
Said Bart,
Watching the staff leading their respective girls.
They're a bit nervy,
That's all,
" said Tuppence.
We've got to be careful,
Extra vigilant in case one of them kicks off.
Or tries to escape,
" said Bart.
Yeah,
There is that too.
The sooner we get all our suspects in a row,
The better.
Isn't that darse?
Same thing.
Toppan sat back and ate her suspect list surreptitiously.
Inspector Tryhard's waiting for the post-mortem,
So I'll get in first to see if I can loosen a few tongues.
I'm going to strike while the iron's hot.
She pulled out her favourite pink marker.
Right,
Sharon first,
I think.
She's as good a place as any to start.
Bart smiled.
Up and stern.
I do believe you're enjoying yourself.
What makes you say that?
And a little bow.
The post-it notes?
The fancy pink pen?
I do love my stationary,
You know that part!
I do now.
No one is beyond suspicion,
Right?
" said Tuppence,
Eager to get started.
And if that's the case.
.
.
Where were you on the night in question?
And where were you?
Between the hours of nine and twelve.
Said Bart.
Who said the hours are nine and twelve?
Well,
You said about ten.
Hmm,
And you're gonna take my word for that,
Are you Bart?
Come on,
You'll have to do better than that!
Answer the question,
Said Bart.
You were supposed to be marking,
Weren't you?
Up and smiled.
In a murder investigation,
No one was exempt and she was glad that now she could rely on her best friend to keep his head.
Someone had to.
Okay,
Well,
I was mostly watching Poirot repeats on ITV and trying to remember where I put my divorce papers.
And where were you between that time?
Bartholomew Bowman.
In the library alone.
You're going to need a better alibi than that.
Yep,
And I'm going to need a better life,
But I don't have one tea,
So that is the best that I've got.
Tuppence shook her head.
Oh Bart,
We're going to have to move faster than this.
I'm sure I've seen weed on the prowl at very strange times of the night.
I wouldn't be surprised if she's working for TryHard.
Oh,
Tuppence,
Said Bart.
Don't be ridiculous.
She's the deputy head,
That's all.
Okay,
So she's a bit of a jobsworth.
Tuppence said nothing more.
She knew she was on to something,
But she didn't have time to think about that now.
First stop,
It was Sharon in the canteen.
The school flirt.
Sharon,
She considered.
Was as good a place to start as any.
