Les 1
Identify Your Critic
Welcome to the first day of this course. You have taken the first step in your journey of transforming your inner critic. In this class, we will work on identifying the voice of the inner critic. Once we have recognized who our inner critic is, what characteristics it has and how it works, we can become aware of how it has been affecting us and start to be more in charge of ourselves and our emotions. We then can start to use its power as fuel towards our internal freedom, lighting the way back into our hearts.
Les 2
Get To Know Your Inner Critic
Once you start understanding why the inner critic is there, you can come closer to stopping its negative effect. The inner critic’s job was initially to protect you from harm. But when negative talk gets out of hand, it can affect your emotions, actions, and behavior. In today’s class, we will focus on uncovering what our inner critic is trying to protect us from and at what point in our life it first appeared. By doing this introspection, you will come closer to understanding how your inner critic works and how you can better manage it.
Les 3
Notice Your Thoughts
All actions start with a motivation in your mind. So when thoughts of shame, insecurity, self-doubt or fear constantly swirl around in your mind, you can’t gather the courage to change your behavior and habits or work toward reaching your full potential. In this class, we will bring more awareness to our thoughts, and start to distinguish which ones lead to misconceptions about ourselves and how to stop overly identifying with these debilitating thoughts.
Les 4
Replace Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
When the inner critic has taken over completely, it leads you to adopt unhealthy coping mechanisms. In today’s class, we will discuss what types of unhealthy coping mechanisms we use to feel better when our inner critic is putting us down and why we resort to this. We will work on developing self-awareness and finding ways to replace these mechanisms with healthier habits.
Les 5
Do It Anyway
When you want to try something different or take on a new challenge, your inner critic shows up, leading you to think you are incapable of doing it. The inner critic holds you back and impedes your chances of growing, flourishing, and uncovering joy. In today’s class, we will work on identifying what our inner critic has prevented us from going after. We will learn how to create a little bit of space, to let the courage from our hearts shine through and lead us forward beyond the inner critic’s ominous warnings, and to take steps towards pursuing the things we have been afraid of.
Les 6
What Are You Exaggerating?
The inner critic sends us into spirals of self-limiting beliefs and negative self-talk whenever we think we have not performed well. In this class, we will examine which thoughts arise after events or moments of perceived “failure”. We will learn to distinguish how often we exaggerate these failures, creating misconceptions about them, and move towards a more heart-based mode of thinking.
Les 7
Practice Compassion
We will get to know the real meaning of compassion, a quality that has been misinterpreted. When you face a challenge, the inner critic takes over in full force, driving you to use unhealthy coping mechanisms to distract yourself from your pain. In today’s class, we will focus on uncovering the innate compassion and kindness from our hearts. When we become more present, we tune into our heart and develop its innate quality of compassion. We will use this compassion to manage our inner critic so that its voice lessens and becomes softer.
Les 8
Remember Your Innate Goodness
The inner critic’s incessant chatter focuses on reinforcing negative and self-limiting beliefs. When you spend too much of your energy fixated on it, you forget your innately good qualities. It can be a difficult task uncovering your innate goodness because believing in it could mean you have to radically change your life, and change can be frightening. In today’s class, we will focus on uncovering the innate goodness we all have in our hearts. We will work on strengthening the parts of ourselves which reflect our goodness and start building more trust in our good qualities.
Les 9
Don't Universalize It
One typical characteristic your inner critic has is universalizing and overgeneralizing. When one small unfavorable event occurs, it lets the whole experience define who you are. It does this from a place of insecurity and fear. In this class, we will observe how and when the inner critic universalizes our experiences and actions. We will practice with specific exercises to counteract its tendency to universalize and become more aware of its tactics and effects on us.
Les 10
Create Boundaries
Developing and creating boundaries is essential to your spiritual development. When you allow others to stomp on your boundaries, you allow your inner critic to take the wheel, watering the seeds for more anger, frustration, and sadness. In today’s lesson, we will acknowledge the areas of our life we need to maintain more boundaries in and become aware of the boundaries we need to set with our inner critic. We will learn how to use compassion to go about setting these boundaries.
Les 11
Reality Test
To master your inner critic, you must have enough self-empowerment to confront it and to question it. When you check the ‘reality’ or validity of your negative thoughts or beliefs, you can work towards silencing your inner critic’s condemning voice. In this class, we will work on cognitive reframing, a technique from cognitive-behavioral theory. We will conduct reality-testing on our negative thoughts, observing them against real-life evidence and facts. We will learn to separate ourselves from our inner critic and replace our negative thoughts with positive ones.
Les 12
Reframe The Thoughts Of Your Inner Critic
When the inner critic takes control over us, it obscures our vision and offers a one-sided perspective of reality. We get attached to a certain thought or belief and, as a result, form a misconception about ourselves. In today’s class, we will practice reframing our negative thoughts. By observing our thoughts from a different view, we can focus on the positive qualities and strive to uncover the good in each situation, instead of allowing the negative to blur our self-perception.
Les 13
Let Go & Move On
The inner critic is known for holding onto the past. That is why it can be difficult to release our past conditioning and unhealthy habits along with fixed identities we have accumulated over the years. In this class, we will practice letting go of past painful experiences and trauma and move forward, letting the light in our heart guide us. Letting go of the past doesn’t mean we are ignoring our past or burying our pain away. It means we stop allowing it to define us and we start believing in our capability for change.
For further practice, Sah recommends the meditation, Forgiveness Practice - Be at Peace with Yourself and the World, also available in the library.
Les 14
Learn To Reparent Yourself
A great deal of your negative self-perception, trauma and pain lies in your past and the way you grew up. If you want to transform your inner critic from a vicious bully into a kind friend, you need to break the past cycles of your conditioning and embrace your inner child along with its wounds. In today’s class, we will learn how we can reparent the inner child in us. We will hold space for our inner child and be attentive to its needs. We will practice showering our inner child with affection, kindness and compassion.
For further practice, Sah recommends the meditation, Inner Child Healing, also available in the library.
Les 15
Stop Trying To Be Perfect
Striving to be perfect can be exhausting, agonizing and crippling. Our inner critic often leads us to believe that if we can’t be perfect at something, then there’s no point in even trying. In today’s class, we will focus on recognizing the areas of our life which are driven by perfectionism and observe how it affects our mental landscape, our words and our actions. We will focus on minimizing the pressure we put on ourselves, and as a result, begin to silence the inner critic.
Les 16
Not Enoughness
The inner critic feeds your innermost fears and insecurities. Feeling as though you aren’t good enough is a stressful and depressing emotion. In this class, we bring more awareness to the areas of our life which we think are overcome by ‘not enoughness’. We will practice using tools to change this misconception and gain more trust in ourselves. We will dive deep into our heart and tap into our innate compassion and joy, instead of further watering the seeds of fear and insecurity.
Les 17
Gain Trust In Yourself
People who trust themselves do not believe the inner critic’s negative talk because they know that life is an ever-changing cycle of ups and downs. They do not take rejection or failure at heart. In this class, we will practice coming back to the present and releasing the anxiety or fear related to the past and future. When we enter the present moment we tune into our heart’s innate qualities of compassion and joy which helps us cultivate our self-trust and build our confidence.
Les 18
Find A Healing Ally
In today’s class, we will focus on how making friends, forming strong connections and finding a tribe of supporters can help us in our healing journey. When we don’t have a strong support system in place, we tend to become more critical of ourselves and allow the inner critic to take over.
Les 19
Create New Memories
The inner critic enjoys ruminating on negative memories because it is easier to hold on to negative events and situations instead of positive ones. In today’s class, we will focus on creating new, joyful memories. We will practice changing our perspective and viewing each day as a new opportunity to have positive experiences. We will learn how to come back to the present moment and tap into the boundless opportunities we have each day.
Les 20
Question Your Feelings
Our emotions are a very real part of us, but they don’t always depict reality. Usually, our present emotions are triggered by the pain and trauma of the past. In this class, we will bring awareness to our emotions and observe how they are triggered. We will practice questioning these feelings, locating their point of origin, and allowing ourselves to view them in a different light. We will learn how to manage them so that they don’t become all-consuming.
Les 21
Learn To Tell The Difference Between The Voice Of The Inner Critic & The Voice Of The Discernment
According to the Buddha, there are two types of thoughts. Those leading to enlightenment and those taking you away from enlightenment. Your inner critic’s negative talk leads you away from enlightenment, so if you to want to weaken it, you must stop feeding it. In this class, you will learn how to distinguish between the voice of the inner critic and the voice of discernment.
Les 22
Resilience
Resilience is how quickly we recover from painful experiences, even trauma, divorce, bankruptcy, unemployment or the death of a loved one. We are preconditioned to view challenging situations as if something is wrong; the inner critic makes us believe we are a victim. In today’s class, you will learn how to build your resilience by turning inward and becoming more intentional about bringing forth your best qualities when navigating challenging situations. You will tend to your heart’s innate qualities; wisdom, courage, love and compassion and allow them to guide you, showing you how everything is temporary and reminding you that you will be able to see the light again.
Les 23
Seeing Poison As Medicine
When someone is in pain, we unintentionally look away. Their suffering stirs up fear or anger, causing us resistance and confusion. Tonglen practice is an ancient Buddhist meditation practice which helps to awaken compassion and reduce selfishness. It translates as ‘giving and taking’ and is practiced by taking in the pain and suffering of others and giving back compassion and love. In today’s class, you will learn this practice and work on using poison as medicine to build compassion for yourself and others. You will learn how to shift the habitual patterns of the mind to create space and acceptance of suffering, while enhancing your own peace of mind.
Les 24
Stop Ruminating & Go Be Of Service
When you find yourself ruminating on things you regret or mistakes you’ve made, it is time to redirect your attention and remember the goodness within. The point is not to deny your mistakes. When you keep rehearsing them, analyzing them, or creating stories around them, you’re simply reinforcing the pain and alienation they’ve already caused you.
In today’s class, we will learn how to review our mistakes once or twice and then work on finding the determination to change and move on. We will practice the bodhisattva vow, which will create space in our hearts and awaken compassion so that we can be of service to others.
For further practice, Sah recommends the meditation, Powerful Meditative Prayer, also available in the library.
Les 25
Know Your Triggers
Learning to acknowledge what triggers your negative emotions is crucial if you want to silence the inner critic’s negative talk and stop the blame game. In this class, we will learn how to create space when triggers arise, and how to release them. We will learn to approach triggers from a place of curiosity instead of fear.
For further practice, Sah recommends the meditation, Seeing Triggers as a Gift, also available in the library.
Les 26
Fake It Till You Make It
When you want to build your self-esteem, you need to work on the kind of attitude you strive to project. Choosing to act as the most awakened version of yourself, even if it doesn’t seem natural at first, will help you kickstart your self-confidence. In this class, we will use visualization to start changing habitual patterns of low self-esteem and work on tuning into the heart to awaken what is already there. We will practice changing our intentions, words and actions to shift our outward behavior and exude more confidence.
Les 27
Happiness Vs. Suffering
In the last 4 days of the course we will learn about the 8 worldly concerns which are foundational teachings from Buddhist Psychology. They are the four hopes and corresponding four fears, which our inner critic is constantly feeding off of, endlessly—until we realize that we have an inner well of unconditional joy, and love. In this class, we will learn to change our relationship to happiness and suffering, by observing our attachments and our aversions to our internal and external world.
Les 28
Fame Vs. Insignificance
We have been conditioned to associate fame with significance. The line of thinking is, “When I am famous, I will be safe from rejection.” In our desire to seek validation from others, we lose our power and allow our inner critic to take center stage. In this class, we will learn the role that our inner critic plays in using our conditioned fear of insignificance to keep us paralyzed. We will practice tuning into our heart’s wisdom in order to cultivate a deeper level of self-acceptance.
For further practice, Sah recommends the meditation, How To Be Happy For Yourself and Others, also available in the library.
Les 29
Praise Vs. Blame
We live in a culture where we are encouraged to seek praise from others in order to validate our self-worth. If we do not receive the praise that we desire, we blame the external world for our suffering. In turn, we end up compromising who we are and get stuck in a spiral of destructive emotions. In this class, we will go inward and identify the areas of our lives where we engage in approval-seeking behaviors. We will empower one another to own our mistakes, without fear or shame, so that we can realign with our hearts.
Les 30
Gain Vs. Loss
Our inner critic has led us to believe that once we get ‘something’, we will finally be happy. Similarly, we are told that if we lose something, we will be sad. As a result, we spend so much of our lives forming attachments to things, people, and emotions, even when they no longer serve us. Our fear of loss creates suffering, which in turn, stifles our happiness. In this final class, we will be reminded of our potential to move through life without being driven by attachment and aversions so that we feel empowered to share our gifts with the world.
