The Grief Toolbox

In this lesson, we talk about the different forms grief can take and a general sense of the timeline of an experience of grief (which is cyclic and variable). We think a little bit about how the five stages of grief may (or may not) play a role. We also talk about how grief lives in the body and best practices to care for and honor that.

Grief can be even more challenging when you're unclear on whose emotions are whose, especially when your grief involves other people in some way. This simple meditation can be used daily to help you protect the tenderness of your energy and clear out whatever isn't yours.

This meditation focuses on the experience of heartache. Rather than trying to distract or move out of that heartache, we spend some time mindfully sitting with the experience in our bodies, cultivating compassion and kindness for our hurt selves. Part of this work is learning to tolerate the feeling states that come with grief. You may want to make sure you have enough time and space to sit with these emotions especially if tears do come before you sit down to try it.

When we're grieving, we need sleep, but we can sometimes struggle to sleep with all the thoughts that are going through our heads. Sleep meditations can really, really help. This one focuses on grounding and connecting to the medicine of the earth element to help settle the nervous system and allow the body to get the rest it needs.

We're jumping right into the topic of death here and exploring some different ways to look a the meaning of death and the afterlife from various points of view. You may or may not already have a faith that teaches about what happens after death. Whatever your background, it's worth considering. What does death mean in a spiritual sense?

This simple meditation invites you to explore connection with a loved one who has passed over, someone you don't talk to anymore, or someone you might want to meet. It could be a human being or a pet. If you're grieving a being in particular, this meditation gives you a chance to talk to them in this spiritual or inner realm where you can ask what you want to ask, say what you want to say, and listen for any responses.

This meditation invites guidance from a spiritual perspective. You can ask for any kind of guidance you might need--from a loved one, a god or goddess, a spirit guide, or some other archetype, as long as they have your highest good in mind. Set your intentions, enter a safe space for you, and invite the guidance you need right now.

Grief needs sleep--and sleep meditations can help. Grief can severely disconnect us from our spirituality, and this meditation gently invites that connection in the service of rest. This meditation uses a wide definition for spirituality, so you can work with whatever resonates for you the most in this moment.

In this lesson we talk about the most common emotions that can come up alongside grief, including anxiety, shame, loneliness, and anger. Each one has a purpose and learning to understand and honor our emotions and what they need from us can be a powerful practice in learning from and moving through our grief.

This meditation is intended to be a safe space to simply feel your sadness. To allow the waves of emotion to move through your body without trying to fix or change or even understand them. Simply allow your sadness the space it needs and you may be surprised at how much that helps to move it, as well.

Loneliness can be hard to sit with, but it is a powerful emotion meant to help you find true connection. It is a normal and common response to grief, especially if we've lost someone or a community that really mattered to us. Sit with your loneliness and allow it to talk to you. You may learn something you didn't know.

In this meditation, we sit with our anger to learn from it, not to make it go away, tame it, or calm it. We're not acting on this anger, simply listening and learning. Anger often has wisdom for us, especially about where our needs are not met or where our boundaries have been crossed. Find out what your anger has to teach you.

In this lesson, we talk about concrete strategies to help yourself move through your grief. There is a general protocol that I use for grief that you may find helpful as well to give yourself a sense of structure and some actions to take around expressing and healing with your grief. The attending meditations include some of those meditations you can do for yourself as well.

This is a moving meditation practice that encourages you to simply put on some music (or not) and allow your body to move in the way it wants to. Explore the shapes and postures of your grief, anger, disappointment, or whatever else, and allow your body to simply express. There is no specific movement you need to do here, this is more of a practice of listening to your body and following the emotional energy within you. All you need is some space, maybe a carpet or a yoga mat, and comfortable clothes.

This meditation is also a ritual that could include a candle, lighter or match, and some paper and pen. Sit with what you feel about your loss, what you learned from it, and what you keep. You do not need a specific person to say goodbye to, it could also be a thing, a time of your life, or simply sitting with change.

In this lesson, we're going to talk about allowing and including joy and sweetness in our lives while we are grieving and when/as we move through the grief to a happier time. Honoring our grief while also welcoming joy and sweetness can feel a little complicated, but it's possible.

This meditation invites some focus on a moment of sweetness that already exists in your day-to-day life. This doesn't have to be something big--we're looking for very small, simple pleasures that are abundant and available all the time. Then we practice allowing ourselves to have that sweetness without denying or negating the other complex emotions we may also feel.

When we're grieving, we can be really hard on ourselves. Anxiety, shame, and all the other complex emotions of grief can make it hard to focus on caring for and attending to ourselves. This meditation gently encourages the practice of self-love and self-care, even in a very difficult time.