Moon Goddess Mythology And Meditations

We start our practice tonight, on the night of the new moon, with Kameshvari Nitya, whose name is made up of the Sanskrit word kama for “desire” and ishvari which is a female version of the divine—meaning, essentially, “goddess.” The word Nitya is the name for this group of goddesses, and it means “eternal” or “forever.” Just like the moon, the Nityas are always, eternally there, and always, eternally changing. We are in the first of three recurring phases, in the Tantric conception, which is Desire. Our first five nights represent wanting something that we do not (yet) have, and in this phase, we explore the experience of yearning. This is the moment to sit in the dark and contemplate emptiness, loneliness, the lack of light being shared by another body (in this case, the sun). In our meditation, we explore the empty moment at the bottom of the exhale. The journaling prompt for tonight is "I want."

One of Bhagamalini’s major symbols is the lotus, a flower that starts deep in the mud and has to travel through the murkiest waters to bloom in the light. “There’s a crack in everything,” songwriter Leonard Cohen famously wrote, “That’s how the light gets in.” Your writing prompt for tonight is “What moves me?” This is a freewrite—let your pen run across the page without stopping, editing, or thinking too much about it. When you’re done you can look it over, but try to write from just below your conscious mind. Don't forget to share your reflections, thoughts, and questions in the course classroom. I really want to hear what you think!

For me, Klinna is all about unfreezing the old traumas in our bodies, the old fears and insecurities and experiences that prevent us from moving forward toward what we really want. Her erotic energy, which can be sexual but also refers to the deep flow of power that we all have within us, is exuding out of her, helping her to move past her blockages. Tonight’s meditation is not so much a formal meditation as an embodied practice: it’s a Yin hip opener called Pigeon. Avoid this if you feel any pain in your knees, and if you’re pregnant it might be a little too intense to hold for too long, so add more props or stay for less time. Another option is to take Thread the Needle or any hip opening shape you're comfortable in. You could also simply focus on your hips without doing the pose. Don't do anything that hurts and check with your doctor before you try a pose like this especially if you're new to yoga or have any hip, back, knee, or bone issues. Your writing prompt for tonight is “I feel.” Don't forget to share your reflections, thoughts, and questions in the course classroom.

Bherunda teaches us that vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness, but only when we really understand our own tender places. When we’re fully honest with ourselves about what we need, what we want, and what we are missing, we know how to protect those places and how to tell when it’s safe enough to let them out. Our vulnerability can be a source of our power, especially when we use it to connect with another human being. There’s an invitation to do this meditation in the nude if you want to! I highly recommend trying it in the bath. Tonight’s journaling prompt is “my vulnerability.” Share any thoughts, reflections, or questions in the course classroom!

Here we are on the last night of the first five nights in our cycle of Desire. Vahnivasini comes with a moment of choice and action: time to do something! We know what we want now. We’ve thought about the consequences. It is time to do the thing. Vahnivasini helps us to find the courage to go for it. Tonight’s journaling prompt is “I will.” Let me know how it's going in the course classroom!

We’ve made it to the phase of connection in our cycle, and the next five nights will be a celebration and exploration of what connection means. Here, we are in passion, in bliss, in joy, and we are a little high on that. Our thunderbolt warns us that there can be danger in those moments of ecstatic deep connection, and even in our intoxication, we must find a little bit of discernment. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t enjoy the hell out of it. In fact, we should enjoy this moment all the more because it won’t last. Your journaling prompt for tonight is "my pleasure."

On the seventh night, we shift from the intoxication of connection to the work of it: communication within relationship. The word duti means “messenger” in Sanskrit, and Shivaduti is our “go-between.” Part of the tension of our cycle from desire to connection to separation again is that if we are thinking about a relationship, we have to consider ourselves as well as another. We are not just you and me: we are you, me, and then the relationship between us. In this meditation, you’ll imagine a space between you and a loved one (this does not need to be a lover). In your writing, describe this space and how you feel there, perhaps using the phrase “our space.” Share your reflections and questions in the course classroom!

Tvarita is a goddess of instinct and intuition. But these concepts can be difficult—we talk about “trusting ourselves” as if it’s this thing we can just decide to do. But if you’ve had difficult experiences or trauma in your past, trusting yourself can feel a lot more complex than that. Your writing prompt for tonight is to freewrite with the phrase: “I know.” Try not to know with your brain—let your pen run across the page without editing or thinking twice. Let yourself know from your body. Share your thoughts and ideas in the course classroom if you like! I'd love to know how the course is going for you.

“Kula” means “community” in Sanskrit, and “sundari” means “all auspicious” so there is something here for us around the idea of relationship, not only with intimate others but also with our larger community and our ancestors. For me, Kulasundari is about the spiritual practice of being in relationship, which means thinking critically about how you do this thing called love. It means looking at your “books of love”: about what you learned about love from your family and culture, and then being willing to write your own story anyway (with your golden pen). As we move toward the end of our cycle of connection, we are thinking about how our experience of love is overwritten by our culture and community, but finding the wisdom to make our own choices anyway. Your writing prompt for tonight is to write a letter to your brain from the perspective of your heart. Don't forget to share your thoughts in the course classroom when you get a chance so I can hear your reflections and answer your questions!

Nitya Nitya, whose name means "Eternal Eternal" or "Forever Forever" represents the quality of the moon, which is to be both constantly changing and at the same time always the same. Among other things, she carries a skull that is upturned like a cup. She represents the Death Light: those times in our lives when we must face death and endings. Rather than fearing death (as the end of life, the end of the story of myself, the end of this relationship), we allow it to teach us how to stay present in this constantly disappearing moment. Your writing prompt for tonight is to use the death light: imagine you had two months left to live. At the end of your life, what would you do differently? Who would you connect with? What would you say?

On the eleventh night of our cycle, we have moved past the connection phase and have slipped into separation, the last phase of the waxing moon. Separation can be painful, of course, but for Nilapataka it’s about the necessary move into alone-ness, where we can take responsibility for our own healing. Here, we celebrate the gifts of separation (and will continue to do that for the next few nights). Tonight we will freewrite using the prompt: “my blue," which represents the nectar of going through your own difficult experiences.

Vijaya has a double-sided nature, and which face you see changes depending on how you approach her. The Tantraraja warns that “when She is invoked for the purpose of victory in war and the like She is of terrific aspect but in daily worship her aspect is benignant.” In Eric Stoneberg’s lectures on the goddesses, he explains that if you worship her at night, she is saumya, or sweet and easeful, but if you worship her during the day, she is ghori, or horrifying and terrible. This moment is all about the deepening of intimacy with someone (or with the self) when we are willing and able to see the ugliness that is inherent in everything and everyone—even our most revered people. Tonight, your prompt is to write a letter to the body part you will be meditating with—a part that you may have a complicated relationship with. Don't forget to share comments, questions, and reflections in the course classroom so I can hear about how it's going!

Sarvamangala teaches another really important concept from a Tantric perspective. In yoga teacher Eric Stoneberg’s words, it’s this: “we are not bound beings trying to get free. We are free beings trying to get bound.” Sarvamangala reminds us of the freedom that is already who we are. That no matter our routines and responsibilities, we can click our ruby slippers, as it were, and remember “home”: that free place where we are nothing but spirit in the magic of “floating freely under the vault of the sky.” Tonight we will freewrite using the prompt: “If I were free…”

Jvalamalini is fierce. She knows a lot about boundaries. She is in a practice of standing up for what she needs and wants, for making a case for her autonomy. Even (especially?) within our intimate relationships, we need this quality of standing up for our boundaries. Sometimes that means we are willing to let go of our relationships in order to maintain that, but it can also be an important practice of staying true to ourselves without getting lost within intimacy. Tonight we will freewrite using the prompt from Jvalamalini's tortoise: “Inside my shell…”

The word citra in Sanskrit means “variegated” or “painted” like this goddess’s multicoloured dress. She is all about the story, the created reality that represents something else. Stories are far more important than we often give them credit for. Stories are, actually, how we live our lives. Citra is in part about the concept of maya, the illusion of reality that we take for granted as real in our day-to-day lives. You are the most important storyteller of your life. How you tell the story of who you are and how you love has the power to actually create that reality. While there is still one more lesson to go, more often than not the fifteenth night is the night of the full moon. With Tantra, though, there's always a little bit more! So if the full moon lands tonight, that's fine, you can still do the last meditation tomorrow or whenever it works for you. Tonight we consider what has happened for us since we began this journey together. You may like to look back over your writing prompts since night one. Then you can write (in the freewrite style or not) on the story of this series for you: “This moon cycle….” Please feel free to share some of these thoughts in the course classroom, I'd love to know what you are thinking.

Technically the amount of time between the new and full moon is 14.8 days, so it's likely to land on the fifteenth (or even the fourteenth) night. But Tantra gives us a little bit more, and we must now learn about Lalita, the Queen of the Moon Goddesses. She is the prime representation of Shakti, or Goddess energy, in this tradition. As we come to the end of our journey with this particular moon cycle, we’ve been playing with the energies of desire, connection, and separation. The last few goddesses have been all about withdrawing from the world and others, but we’re not going to stay there (or anywhere). The cycle keeps moving forever (the word “nitya” means “eternal” like the eternal change of the moon). We are inevitably moving back to the new moon again, where we will encounter loneliness, which will propel us into connection and then back to separation again. Desire and aversion, as represented by the noose and the goad, are not to be feared and avoided, as some traditions believe. Rather, they are the engine of the play between desire, connection, and separation, which is really the juice of our short lives. In this meditation, you'll hear a story about how Lalita's apparent weakness was actually the source of her strength. For tonight, you have two options for your writing prompts. The first is to consider a part of yourself that you consider a weakness and think about how it might actually be a strength for you. The other option is to freewrite with the phrase “my playfulness.” This is the last of the moon phase meditations, and I know some of you will want more. You can do this course as many times as you'd like, looking back on how your responses to the journaling prompts may have changed. You can leave it here, possibly to come back some other time in your life when you need it. And don't forget to pick up my book, Secrets of the Eternal Moon Phase Goddesses, for more. I'd love to hear your reflections and questions in the course classroom, so don't forget to post your thoughts there.