Create and Reach Your Goals, Mindfully

Why even have a goal at all? When you have a goal that you love, it helps to focus your attention and provides a sense of direction. It’s a way of organizing your thoughts, and the decisions you make about how you use your time. As you move towards it, you engage in self-discovery and growth.

When you practice mindfulness and bring your attention to the present moment, released from judgment and stories, you can choose a clear goal. Watch out for going into your past, and stories of how things didn’t work out before. Watch out for your ego-identity, which might say, “I’m just not the kind of person who. . .” Watch out for your negative creativity, which might point out all the possible future reasons why you won’t reach your goal. Start by being present in this moment. Let go of your past. Let go of your future. Enjoy how it feels right now, being alive. Your life is unfolding, one moment at a time. What would you like to experience? Then, use the SMARTIE framework to clarify your goals.

When you commit to a goal, it’s like you make an agreement with yourself. You decide that you will show up for the goal, even if you get off track sometimes. You won’t give up. Today, think about which goal you will commit to. When you think of this goal, does it give you energy or drain your energy? This is where we can practice mindfulness. In the present moment, when you look at this goal in your mind, what do you feel in your body? Is it a sense of dread? Or a feeling of possibility, and determination? You might feel some uncertainty – but does it feel enticing? Or do you feel resistant? When you commit to a goal that gives you energy, it will be easier to follow through even when it's hard sometimes.

Too often, we choose a goal thinking, “I will like myself better when. . .” We don’t like our body, so we want it to be bigger or smaller. We don’t like our relationship status, so we want to be single or partnered. Don't withhold love until later. Love yourself for choosing the goal, and for who you are now. When you choose a goal and remember to love yourself right now and every step of the way, it will give you more energy.

When we focus on perfection, it's easy to start judging and then feel discouraged. Instead, be clear about the purpose of your goal, and why it is meaningful to you. When you know the purpose, it's easier to keep going. This is important because it might be a while before you see the payoff. You may also discover some pleasant surprises as you work towards your goal -- bonus benefits that you hadn't planned on, but that happen along the way. Keep your focus on purpose, rather than perfection.

When you set a goal, expect some resistance to flare up! It might appear as judgment from yourself, or others. It may sound like, "Be practical," or "Be realistic," or even, "You? Seriously, you're not that kind of person." When you go after a goal for the first time, you may need to update your identity and sense of who you are. And, you might change in a way that makes other people feel uncomfortable. Change can always activate a feeling of fear of the unknown. When you're aware of this, you can create more safety for change and let the resistance go, with love.

Sometimes we can get stuck on the "How" and want to know exactly how things will go. Remember that there can be many ways to reach your goal. You don’t need to control things for things to work out for you. When you're attached to the "How" it's like trying to micro-manage your goals and how you will get there. Instead, focus on being committed to the process and the goal itself — and be open to how the path unfolds.

Today is about taking action from where you are. Right now is the perfect time to make a decision, to make a choice — to take action. It can be a small, gentle action, like following an intuitive nudge or asking a question. A series of small, gentle actions over time will create remarkable results! Just like with meditation, we take one breath at a time. Perhaps your action today is to slow down and meditate for 2 minutes. Take action in the present moment for your future self.

Just like with meditation, sometimes you get distracted. You might forget about your goals, or go back into your old patterns. I want you to know that it’s ok. It’s not over, and you didn’t blow it. You’re a human, and you got distracted, which is a normal thing for humans. And just like in meditation: come back. When you notice you’ve drifted, don’t get mean with yourself or put extra pressure on yourself. Just notice: “Oh, I drifted off track.” And then come back, with love for yourself and a whole lot of compassion. Come back to what your goals are, and why they are important to you. Love yourself exactly as you are. Commit to the outcome. Take action from where you are. Take it one breath at a time.

Congratulations! You've made it to the final lesson in this course. Don’t wait until you reach your goal to celebrate. You must celebrate small wins! Just like a baby taking its first steps, cheer for yourself when you take a step toward your goal. This helps train your brain to look for gratitude and appreciation, and to identify success – which helps to motivate and encourage you. Celebrate coming back when you get off track. Celebrate taking action. Loving yourself. Being willing to release attachment to how. Find something to celebrate every day and enjoy how it feels in your body.