Wearing Gratitude Like a Cloak by Jenny Lane.
I have spent many moments in my life alone as I sit here now.
Although I am alone,
No awakened company I know that I am not.
My household dreams,
The neighbors dream,
And the trees silently stand and protect me.
This white wicker rocking chair I sit in holds my body in peace.
I don't know who made it or who sat in it before it came to me,
Yet I am grateful.
My ancestors sit with me,
Share tales unspoken throughout my DNA.
Tales I will not speak now,
But will live throughout these moments of being alone,
While never being alone.
There is no real loneliness,
Only in our minds.
The air that fills my lungs,
The water I drink,
Is all the same air and water that sustained life before me.
We share this air,
We share this water,
We share this life.
I often think where this air and water has journeyed before it reached me.
The souls of shared electrons.
The beings the bodies it circulated through gave life to when I feel connected in the earthly way to the all that came before me.
When I am alone,
While my people sleep,
I send them prayers of peace to find solace in their dreams and when they awake,
A place of non-suffering in this silent moment of air and water.
In this silence,
In this chill of the air,
Anytime I can remind myself,
I remind myself of gratitude.
For the blessing that is life.
Living in gratitude is one of the greatest gifts one can offer to themselves.
We only have to remember.
And remembering when our pain is spilling over into tomorrow's moment isn't an easy task.
It's one of our most challenging tasks of life because life is painful as fuck sometimes.
And pain is all-encompassing at times.
As is love.
Pain can replace everything in our minds and in our bodies.
It can slowly wrap its fingers around every beautiful thing on this earth until it feels like there's nothing left to hold on to but the pain.
Suffering is a powerful force.
Yet there is a force more powerful than suffering.
Love.
Yet the two come together in this life a packaged deal.
Love is compassion,
Kindness,
Care.
It's action.
It's thoughtful understanding and awareness.
Suffering exists for everyone.
It's inescapable.
Yet so is love.
One just has a louder voice for a while in the moments of alone silence.
For it is here in alone moments turned into mind-messing loneliness.
It finds most people when we are alone in our minds.
It takes practice and skill to learn to listen to the quiet whispers of love.
To hear it in the air connecting us.
The air which caresses the wind chimes and softly says,
Hello.
I'm here.
In the difference of fabric ruffling sounds as my arm moves in this cloak.
As I sit cross-legged and find the words.
The tales of the all that came before me so that you too can feel this peace.
The wind chimes could tell you.
The hands that bent the wicker into this chair could tell you.
My fingers upon this keyboard seem to not do it justice in this silence.
The sounds of my cloak perhaps will remind you.
The words in your eyes will perhaps remind you.
Hearing my voice will perhaps remind you to come back to gratitude.
Come back to love in moments you are alone.
To live wearing this cloak of gratitude in every possible moment.
To remember you wear it in every moment of now.
To honor those who came before us.
To honor the air we breathe,
The water we can drink,
The love we do have.
This life is meant to be honored.
Those lives are meant to be given thanks.
For bringing me here to this moment cross-legged in this wicker chair writing today.
The words I write I do so in gratitude in my everlasting thanks for discovering the joy,
Even when there's uncomfortability.
The joy,
The love,
The peace does exist when there is pain,
Beyond the pain,
Here in this cloak of gratitude.
If one can learn how to remember it,
This cloak will warm you and in your wearing it,
Life transforms.
Pinks become vibrant.
Joy stretches into new moments.
Compassion becomes breath.
And love calls in every new sound,
Every new experience.
And that's every new moment.
Every moment you are anew.
And it's this one simple thing.
One simple thing.
Focusing on what we're blessed with instead of focusing on lack.
It's so simple,
Yet we rush around and are freaking desperate to escape our pain in such difficult,
Complicating ways.
When gratitude is right here,
Love is right here,
Peace is right here,
With one thought of gratitude.
With the remembrance of this cloak today,
Just one moment of thanks for being alive and why and how,
Everything that had to happen for you to be here.
Gratitude isn't just a journaling exercise,
Making a list in a notebook to check off and clothes for the day.
It's a cloak you must learn to wear about you every day in as many moments as you can remember.
When we wear our cloaks,
Loneliness no longer fills our brains because it is here,
In this cloak,
We are reminded of the interconnectedness of everything for us even to exist.
Put on your cloak today and remember.
And if you do forget,
I'll be here with you,
Sitting cross-legged in this white wicker rocking chair,
Writing to remind you.
