These Are The Thoughts I'm Having

In this session we practice recognising our thoughts as separate from us. Just another thing to observe mindfully. It is possible to view thoughts in the same way as we observe sounds. That is: they come, peak, then go. We cannot hold onto them for any longer. Mindfulness gives us the skills to do the same thing with thoughts, to see them appear out of nowhere, get stronger, then disappear back into nowhere.

Transcript

Today I want to contemplate the nature of our thoughts.

What exactly is a thought?

I know it sounds a little bit silly to even think about it,

To even consider that as a question,

But remember that our goal,

One of our goals with mindfulness is to investigate the nature of reality as it is for what it is,

Without judgment and without filter.

And considering how prevalent thoughts are in our lives,

They're always there,

Wouldn't it be good to sort of break down what they are and potentially sort of reframe them in a way that can best benefit our mental states?

Because the problem with thoughts are that they can be quite trapping.

We can become associated with them,

We can fall into them and almost become them,

But when you step back and look at your thoughts,

They're more akin to sound.

Think about what a sound is like.

It comes,

It peaks,

And then it disappears.

You don't control it,

You can't hold on to it.

And the same is true for thoughts when you're mindful.

You watch them appear out of nowhere,

They grow in intensity,

Then they disappear back into nowhere.

You don't actually control the thoughts that appear,

They just come.

But unlike sound,

Thoughts can trap you.

Thoughts can pull you in,

Thoughts can trigger more thoughts,

And now rather than meditating,

Rather than observing them from a detached perspective,

You are those thoughts.

You're going down a path of anxiety or depression or rumination.

You're remembering something,

You're planning a conversation,

You're daydreaming about chocolate,

Whatever it is.

But meditation enables us to step back and observe those thoughts from a detached perspective.

When we return our focus back to the breath,

Or whatever our meditation object is,

We're training our mind to recognize when it's distracted.

Our mind wanders into thoughts,

We refocus it back on the breath.

We see a visual image,

We refocus our mind back on the breath.

We remember the past,

We start planning the future,

We're having an argument in our mind.

We have a physical itch,

Whatever it is that's taking our mind away from the physical sensations of the breath at the nose.

We're training ourselves to recognize it,

And then return our focus back to the breath.

But what's the real-world application?

The real-world application of this skill is that we're able to see thoughts in real time and not fall into them.

Rather than being one with the thoughts,

Mindfulness allows us to detach from them.

Now this isn't detachment in a bad way,

This isn't detachment in the sense of you're not present like a dissociative detachment.

This detachment is basically giving you a little bit of a breath or a little bit of space.

The thoughts over here,

And you're separate from it.

You see it,

You can engage with it if you choose,

But it isn't you.

Just like a sound isn't you,

Just like a sound appears,

You observe it and then it disappears.

Thoughts can be like that too,

But thoughts are like stickier,

They're more enticing,

They trap us more,

We become associated with it.

But we are not our thoughts,

And the more we meditate mindfully,

The more we can recognize that fact as a reality.

We practice on the meditation mat in sessions with talks like this every day,

But then in our waking life,

In our real world,

In our daily life,

When we feel angry or upset or jealous or lustful or craving or just any thought pops up,

If we remember our mindfulness practice,

We can see it as something separate from us,

As something distinct,

As just another stimulus.

That state is possible.

Now don't get me wrong,

It's an ideal we're striving towards.

No matter how much you meditate,

You will at times get suckered,

You will at times fall into thought,

You will at times lose your mindfulness.

But the more you meditate,

The better chance you have of remaining detached,

The less likely you are to fall into it,

And if you do,

The quicker you will recognize that you're trapped in that mental state.

I might still get angry,

But I'm not angry for anywhere near as long.

Same thing for all of the other emotionality that I have suffered from in the past.

It won't impact me as strong and it won't impact me as long,

And that skill set,

That ability is great for making better life decisions.

One of the things you can do when you recognize a thought,

Or even just as a general practice,

Is to step back and just say to yourself,

These are the thoughts that I'm having,

And just observe them.

If you can do that,

It's almost like you're watching yourself as a TV screen,

As a movie,

Or you're reading the book of yourself.

It's like you're getting a chance to witness the entity that you are,

In the same way that you might observe your child or your kid,

Or you know,

Something in nature happening,

Like a pet or a bird or whatever,

And you're looking at them like,

Man,

This is exactly what they're like.

I'm really feeling who and what they are right now.

You can do that with yourself.

You do that with yourself by stepping back,

By observing the thoughts as something separate from you,

And if you find yourself getting trapped or pulled into them,

You can say to yourself,

These are the thoughts that I'm having.

These things that I'm witnessing,

These thoughts,

These memories,

These emotions,

Whatever they are,

These are the thoughts that I'm having.

These are the thoughts that I'm having.

Another thought comes,

These are the thoughts that I'm having.

The idea being is that you're training yourself to see yourself as detached and separate from it.

And once again,

This isn't blocking yourself off from emotions.

This isn't blocking yourself off and making you a mindless zombie.

It's actually almost the exact opposite.

You're not mindless.

You're still having those thoughts,

But you're not just falling into them.

So what I want to do now is a five-minute session.

You're going to take a seat,

Get nice and comfortable,

Have some good posture,

And start observing the breath,

Entering and leaving the nose.

It's like a normal mindfulness session.

And then for the five minutes,

You will start labeling the thoughts when they come.

You find yourself seeing a thought before you get trapped by it,

Before you get pulled by it.

Just a little mental note.

That's a thought.

That's a thought that I'm having right now.

Then gently,

Calmly,

Return your focus back to the breath at the nose.

Okay,

Are you ready to begin?

Let's start.

You you you you you you you you you you okay so how'd you go I I find that when I'm doing these practices not only do negative thoughts come but also positive thoughts I'm a writer and what happens is is when I meditate it gives that creative space the chance to pop up and to come out and a lot of the time I find myself compelled to want to stop the meditation and start being creative and at times that's fine but at other times most of the time I want to make sure that I keep doing my practice because your brain or your mind or whatever's going on has this seeming desire to stop you from returning your focus back to the breath it'll it'll make you feel tired it'll make you feel bored it'll throw out some negative emotionality and make you want to just stop but then it'll also try and get you to stop meditating with positive thoughts with future planning with excitement with motivation no matter the thought that pops up good bad or otherwise they can all be treated in the same way hmm that's the thought that I'm having right now cool I'm gonna return my focus back to the breath and if you are a creative person if you do use you know like embracing that news so to speak just know that if it is an amazing thought if it's so good it will come back okay you don't have to be a slave to whatever your brain pops up and throws at you these meditation sessions are sacred this time is sacred and make sure that you are working your best to stay diligent in your practice because I guarantee you your mind will try a variety of different tricks to pull you off the mat and get you to stop meditating our goal as meditators a goal as practitioners a goal as people who are trying to embrace mindfulness is to observe those thoughts as we would it sounds separate from us not get attached or pulled towards us have a great day this talk was taken from the book mindfulness a guidebook to the present moment