The Devil You Know
In this session we contemplate the saying, 'Better the devil you know than the devil you don't', using it to discuss relationships and connections and our response to the unknown options that may tempt us. This track is taken from my course, ‘Live Your Most Fulfilling Life’, available now via my profile.
Transcript
Hello and welcome to the session.
I invite you to take a seat or lie down and get yourself comfortable.
You can close down the eyes if you wish and take a deep slow breath in through the nose and out through the mouth.
In a moment I'm going to share with you a proverb,
Aphorism,
Idiom or saying for you to contemplate and I invite you to do so as deeply as possible.
To look beyond your initial default reactions to it and to consider it from all sides.
To be open to it guiding you,
Encouraging you and informing you of potential knowledge,
Insights and wisdoms that may be lying just below the surface.
Our goal with each of these daily contemplations is to use the session to acquire a deeper understanding of ourselves,
The world and our place within it.
So let's take another slow deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth and consider the following.
It's better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
It's better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
It's better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
So this quote,
This saying is one of the sayings that I don't fully necessarily agree with.
Better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
And the reason I feel a little bit against this idea and I'll talk about it from the positive perspective as well,
But my initial response to it is,
I don't like it because to me it pushes for passivity.
If you are struggling,
The devil here is an analogy to pain to an issue,
To suffering,
To a situation in life that you are not happy with.
And it's saying it's better that issue,
That devil quote unquote,
Because you know it than when you don't.
And that might be true.
It might be better to deal with the pains that you know of because you know them,
Right?
And the unknown is unknown.
And there could be any number of possible other problems that you are not equipped or able to handle.
Indeed,
When I share my story of my past,
I moved out of home at 16 due to a variety of different reasons.
People inevitably will say,
You know,
Share,
Offer,
Give sympathy and saying that they couldn't do what I did.
They couldn't handle what I handled.
But then I listened to their story and say,
Well,
I couldn't have handled what you handled.
You know,
It's better the devil you know than the devil you don't,
Right?
But it's a false equivalency because if I could have avoided half,
Three quarters or all of the suffering and rolled that dice,
Well,
I probably would have because it's not like taking action guarantees you a different devil.
It's not like trying to move away from the suffering,
The pain causes other equal or worse suffering to arise.
Indeed,
Almost always the opposite is true.
If you take action towards the positive,
Good things happen.
It's a correlation,
You know,
It's not causational and it's not guaranteed.
But if you are not happy in your station in life,
If you are facing challenges and problems and issues,
Take action.
It's better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
So why does this saying exist?
Why does it persist?
Why is it around?
Well,
I think it's around because there is some truth to it.
You know,
We all have different issues with our body,
You know,
Your good knee,
Your tennis elbow,
Your issues with other aspects of your body.
I've got problems that I deal with daily and I accept that.
I've learned to live with it and that acceptance allows me a certain level of peace,
Right?
I've come to terms with the limitations of my body.
So would I want to trade that for something else?
No,
I'll trade it for something better.
But would I risk something worse in exchange for these inconveniences and limitations that I've accepted?
I had an issue with my shoulder once and I went to see a surgeon about it and they said that,
Well,
Unsurprisingly,
I should get surgery.
And I pushed back because I don't want to go under the knife.
I don't want to get that happen to me.
I don't like the idea of it because I heard that once you go down that path,
You will continue to go down that path and that's not the path that I wanted to take unless I had to.
So I pushed back and I said,
You know,
Will this situation get worse if I don't take the surgery?
And the surgeon said,
No,
You'll continue to feel pain.
You will continue to suffer with what you've come for,
But the condition won't get worse.
You won't be doing any more damage.
I'm like,
Okay,
I can accept this pain.
I can accept that devil because to me,
That is better than the unknown of a potential future of further surgeries,
The unknown consequences.
Now,
Perhaps I should have taken that action.
Perhaps I should have done it.
But since then,
That was years ago,
I've adapted and I've thrived in spite of the pain and also in spite or against that surgeon's suggestions that the pain won't ever go away.
Rehab,
Other therapies,
Meditation,
A whole variety of things have helped to reduce,
Mitigate,
And eliminate most of it.
Now,
I'm in no way saying,
You know,
Go against doctor's advice or anything.
But what I am saying is in reference to this better the devil you know than the devil you don't,
I accepted it.
I accepted my pain and continued because to me,
The fear of the unknown was more extreme than the pain I was feeling daily.
But there have been other times in life where I did leave,
I did move on,
I did run.
And that did cause other issues to arise.
You know,
Every action has a consequence.
If you accept a high pain job,
That comes with more responsibility and more hours.
If you become famous,
You have to deal with the downsides of the fame,
You know,
The lack of privacy.
If you accept a low responsibility,
Low pain job,
Then you have to deal with that lifestyle.
This isn't a measure of fairness.
It's not a measure of right or wrong.
It's just a measure of reality.
The things you choose have consequences.
We all start from different places,
Of course,
But there is that consequence to deal with the actions.
Better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
I just can't accept that.
I can't accept it for everything.
I think that we need to balance this idea of better the devil you know than the devil you don't against prosperity,
Against trying,
Against a stand for what we believe in,
What is possible,
For our potential,
Greatness.
Because if we fear the unknown,
We won't take any steps.
If we fear the unknown,
We accept the suffering,
The devil,
The pain,
The issue that we're currently having.
And we accept stagnation.
Stagnation is a step in a direction that I'm not happy to take.
I want to move forward.
I want to grow.
I want to attain.
I want to be.
I want to solve the problems that need solving.
I want to live a life worth living.
I want to inspire people.
I want to help them to grow and help them to live a life that they want to be living.
My kids,
My family,
My friends,
The wider community,
The world.
And that comes with a headlong sprint into the unknown.
Every day,
I'm taking those steps and I'm being exposed.
But that exposure,
That openness to quote unquote other devils entering my life,
Better the devil you know than the devil you don't.
Every single one of those that I've come across,
That I defeat,
If we're playing in this sort of language that I learn from and move on from,
I'm growing here.
If I accept,
Deal with,
Move on,
Accept,
Deal with,
Move on,
Accept,
Deal with,
Move on,
I'm therefore much stronger,
Much more experienced,
Much more wise because I've stepped into my future.
Because I have faced the devil that I know and moved on and risked the next one.
And then I've dealt with that one,
And then the one after that,
And then the one after that.
That 10th devil,
It ain't got nothing on me,
Baby.
Let's have that attitude.
Let's approach that last one down the line,
The next one,
The next problem,
The next issue,
The next challenge as a minor obstacle in our way,
A fence to climb over,
Not a skyscraper to try and bound over.
We're not supermen,
But with experience,
With practice,
With time,
Those insurmountable objects become minor inconveniences.
That's the way I'm choosing to approach this one.
A bit of a pushback against the devil you know is better than the devil you don't.
But as always,
With these sayings,
You can take it from all perspectives.
And some of the sayings in this course will contradict the other sayings.
And that's what life is like.
You might push,
You might not,
You might accept,
You might not.
And taking each moment,
Each choice for itself,
And choosing whether or not to accept or to push back is where the wisdom arises.
You might deem that you need to practice acceptance against whatever this thing is that is arising.
In that case,
Accept it fully.
Or you might have to practice growth,
Action,
Advancement.
In that case,
Take action fully,
Put everything into it,
Move and change and grow.
So I ask you,
Is it better the devil you know,
Or the devil you don't?
Is it better the devil you know,
Or the devil you don't?
So,
Well done.
This brings us to the end of the session.
At the bottom of your screen,
You'll see an option to view the classroom or to ask a question.
And before moving on,
I invite you to take a moment to click through and share your insights,
To read the answers from other students and to hear my replies.
And remember to start your responses by restating the contemplation,
Or in this case,
Better the devil you know,
So we all know which one you are referring to.
This is an opportunity for deep learning,
Further introspection and insight.
So please don't miss out.
I look forward to seeing you in the next session.
Thank you.
This track is taken from my course,
Live Your Most Fulfilling Life.
It's out now on Insight Timer and is available via my profile.
I invite you to check it out.
See you there.
