Hello everyone and welcome to this week's practice.
Now today we're going to be exploring this sense of I can't but I must and it's really common when we're feeling maybe a sense of overwhelm in the system and it can be really frequently associated with the freeze response in particular.
And what this can feel like is there's a sense of fragility maybe in the body,
In the self,
So a sense of I really don't feel able,
I can't do this,
It's too much.
But alongside that there's also a sense of I must,
I must do this,
I must complete it or something will happen or there's a negative outcome of that.
Maybe it's about what someone might think about you,
Maybe it's about supporting someone else,
Maybe it's about the pressure that you're putting on yourself.
So there's that real kind of tension between I can't but I must and that's really dysregulated to the nervous system and can keep us in that kind of overwhelmed place and state.
So what this kind of short practice is going to be about is how we can start to explore shifting from that very gently into this sense of I can,
So moving a little bit more towards empowerment and strength in ourself and in our system,
But also a sense of I have choice,
I don't have to do anything,
I can choose not to.
So it's a subtle shift but an important one I think and something that I've been working on a lot over the last few months because I'm very,
Very familiar with that feeling of I can't but I must and I'm really enjoying that transition so I wanted to share it with you.
So this practice is going to be maybe a little bit different from many of the other practices and we're just going to do a really short exploration of what those different states feel like in the body,
Just give you an opportunity to practice how you can make that gentle shift and see how it lands for you.
So the first thing I want you to do is just get yourself nice and comfortable,
However that's good for you and your body,
Whether that's seated or lying down or even you can do this one standing up.
Just take a couple of more full deeper breaths when you get there just to arrive.
Letting go of anything you need to on the exhale,
Just coming into your internal world,
Your breath,
Your body and to begin with I just want you to actually tune into that sense very briefly of I can't but I must.
So maybe bring to mind a scenario or something you've got coming up that kind of invokes that feeling and just noticing what's going on in your body with that sense.
Just being curious,
No judgment.
What does the I can't feel like?
Maybe a smallness,
Maybe a collapse,
Maybe a feeling in the stomach,
Whatever it is for you,
Just notice it.
And then alongside it,
Notice the must,
The urgency,
The pressure and noticing what does that pressure feel like to you in your body?
How does it differ from the I can't?
How do they live together?
All right,
So we're not going to stay here for too long.
So in your own time,
Just notice and appreciate what you've observed there and then just take a moment to shake it off.
Maybe move your body a little bit,
Take a few deep breaths.
Just letting it go,
Shaking it off,
Releasing,
Reminding yourself and your body that you're safe at this moment.
All right,
So now we're just going to explore what it's like to take that transition from that feeling of I can't,
But I must.
We're going to explore a sense of I can,
But I don't have to,
I can choose.
So now the first thing I want to do is invite you to tune into that sense of I can,
That sense of empowerment.
So through experience of kind of chronic stress or chronic symptoms,
We can develop this real belief in ourselves to be very fragile.
And that's with good reason and understandable,
But it can be really powerful to shift just gently into a state of resilience and capability and power and strength.
So maybe just take a moment to reflect on your own capability,
Your strength,
All the things that you've managed to get through to this point.
There would have been so many all the times when you've surprised yourself and really allowing that and inviting that scent into your body.
What does it feel like in your body?
How do you hold yourself when you have that empowerment,
You have that belief,
You have that resilience,
That strength.
Maybe it's a sense of your shoulders being back,
Kind of more upright in the body.
Maybe it's gripping of the feet into the ground,
Just noticing what it is for you.
It's a deeper,
Fuller breath.
Then alongside it,
Inviting in this sense of choice,
This sense of no pressure to do anything,
That you have the power to choose everything that you do and you engage in.
So you have that strength of resilience,
Of empowerment,
That softness of knowing,
Ah,
I can choose,
There's nothing I have to do.
I get to choose and noticing the way you feel relief in your body,
In your system,
Knowing you can meet your needs,
You can choose.
Breathing in that combination of strength and softness of permission.
Really appreciating how that combination lands in your body and noticing how different it is from where you started in this practice.
How different it feels from the I can't,
But I must,
Moving to I can and I choose.
And then in your own time,
Taking three final breaths to really just absorb and embed this feeling in your body,
This posture,
Just inviting it in to stay.
And giving yourself full permission to take this into the rest of your day,
The rest of your week.
Knowing you are incredibly resilient,
You are incredibly powerful,
You're incredibly strong.
And you have amazing choice and autonomy in everything you do.
So I hope that serves you to take that with you.
And as ever,
I'd love to hear how you got on with the practice.
So do feel free to let me know in the comments.
So take your own time to transition back into your day,
Into your world,
Into your room.
And I really look forward to seeing you all soon.
