Begin by sitting or lying down comfortably.
You may even want to wrap yourself in blankets,
Supporting your neck and the back of your head if you're lying down.
Take a moment to make a nest or cocoon for yourself.
Relax into your body by noticing your breath flowing in and out and any sensations you may be feeling in your body.
Allow your breath to soften any areas where you feel tightness and tension.
Place your left hand on the centre of your chest and rest your right hand on top of your left and gently close your eyes.
As you begin to sink more deeply into this moment,
Allow your awareness to be fully present in your heart's energy centre,
Your heart chakra,
The area located in the centre of your chest and a couple of inches inward.
Showing up as both emotional and physical pain,
Heartache or heartbreak is one of life's greatest challenges.
Although the heart does not physically rupture during heartbreak,
It certainly feels like it.
Studies show that your brain registers the emotional pain of heartbreak in the same way as physical pain.
Plus love can be addictive,
Like a drug,
Because of the hormones our brain releases when we become really attached to someone or something.
Dopamine and oxytocin in particular are hormones which make us feel good and are released at elevated levels when we're in love.
When heartbreak sets in,
These hormone levels drop and are replaced with the stress hormone cortisol.
Designed to support your body's fight or flight response,
Too much cortisol over a period of time can contribute to anxiety,
Nausea,
Acne and weight gain,
All symptoms associated with heartbreak.
If you are suffering from the agonizing grip of grief,
Know that you are not alone.
We feel this gut-wrenching pang of heartbreak when we lose someone or something we loved or wanted very much.
This could be a romantic relationship or a friendship,
A family member,
A pet or even a job or opportunity.
Heartbreak is connected to a loss of love and belonging.
Heartache is the feeling of losing love.
And if it's romantic love,
You can be riddled with shame and feelings of restlessness,
Regret or resentment spurred on by obsessive thinking.
This feeling of loss doesn't have to be what defines you or reinforces an old narrative.
Brene Brown puts it best when she says,
The brokenhearted are the bravest among us.
They dared to love.
Every time we take a chance on love,
We risk heartbreak.
But when we experience it,
It is a sign we care deeply and that it meant something to us.
During this meditation,
We will remodel your heart to prepare for a new start.
Ntsugi is the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold,
A metaphor for embracing flaws and imperfections.
Your heart may feel like it's broken,
But you are not broken.
Let your heart know that you love and accept it fully,
Even when it appears broken.
We are going to face this heartache by cracking your heart wide open,
Fusing all the pieces together with love and filling any cracks with light so you can return to feeling whole once again.
Your pain is a catalyst for new beginnings and change.
Heartbreak is a path to awakening.
Allow all of your awareness to enter your heart guided by your breath.
Intentionally,
Allow every inhale to fully engage your lungs,
Feeling your stomach expand as you breathe in and contract as you let it all go.
In the book No Mud,
No Lotus,
The Art of Transforming Suffering,
Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh explains,
The secret to happiness is to acknowledge and transform suffering,
Not to run away from it.
In Mother Nature,
You will find a deep well of wisdom.
The lotus flower has a life cycle unlike any other plant and has been around for millions of years,
Even surviving the Ice Age.
To blossom,
The lotus flower must grow through obstacles such as mud and dirty pond water.
The lotus responds to the sun each morning,
Breaks the surface of the water and blooms with pristine petals.
Closing at night,
It sinks beneath the water's surface,
Only to resurface again in the morning without any trace of mud.
The lotus flowers are a symbol of strength,
Resilience and rebirth.
Tune into your heart,
Let it know that it is safe for it to feel whatever it is feeling.
Honoring your emotions,
Especially honoring a broken heart,
May cause an emotional reaction of some kind.
If tears come,
Just let them flow.
Let's begin by asking your heart the following questions.
You may or may not have the answers in your heart at this time,
But try to just sit with this stillness.
Take a deep breath in and gently let that go.
How did I feel while I was in the relationship?
How was it in the beginning?
How about in the middle?
And what about at the end?
How do I currently feel?
How do I want to feel while I'm in a relationship?
What does my heart desire?
Witness the emotions and the sensations swirling in and around your heart space.
Just allow these physical sensations to be there as you breathe into them without brushing them away.
You're simply getting in touch with that emotional energy in your body and how it feels at the physical level.
Ask yourself,
If that energy had a colour,
What would it be?
How about a shape?
How much space does that energy take up in your body?
It's important to note that there's no right or wrong here.
Just notice any visuals,
Colours or shapes.
What texture comes to mind as you breathe into that part of your body?
On your next inhale,
Breathe in deeply,
Filling your lungs completely,
Holding your breath at the top.
When you're ready,
Let it all go with a long audible sigh.
At the end of that breath,
Just return to a pattern of breathing that is comfortable to you.
Feeling your stomach expand completely on every inhale and contract on every exhale.
As you breathe,
Imagine all of the energy from your breath nourishing your heart and on every exhale,
Allow yourself to imagine any stuck or stagnant energy releasing.
Inhale nourishment and love.
And exhale all that no longer serves you.
As you honour your wounded heart,
Just allow yourself to feel and to love yourself through this entire process.
I am allowed to feel.
I love myself even through the pain.
Do not try to judge it or change it or bury this feeling.
In this moment,
You are nourishing and cradling your heart and reassuring it that things are going to be okay.
More than okay.
Once you allow your heart to feel whatever emotions are gnawing at you and you fully accept it,
Give it permission to flow through you.
There's no need to rush this.
Just love yourself through it as you are right now.
You are giving yourself the love that you so deeply deserve.
We must fully love and accept ourselves before we can love and accept others.
Now imagine an emerald green light starting off as a speck,
Building in size with each breath,
Emanating from the centre of your heart.
As you breathe deeply and exhale,
The colour shines brighter and expands further out of your body in every direction.
If you can't picture this light,
That's perfectly fine.
Know that green is the colour of healing.
We're going to direct our attention back to our breath and when you're ready,
Repeat after me either out loud or silently.
With your breath,
Breathe in comfort and exhale pain.
Breathe in joy and let go of sadness.
Breathe in compassion and release anger.
Breathe in forgiveness and let go blame.
Breathe in acceptance and let go judgement.
Breathe in honour and exhale shame.
Breathe in kindness and let go of jealousy.
Breathe in trust and exhale doubt.
Breathe in peace and release restlessness.
Breathe in love and let go of fear.
Once again,
Breathe in love and this time breathe out love.
On your next inhale,
Continue to breathe in this soft pink light on the inhale and see it grow brighter on the exhale.
This soft pink light soothes and provides unconditional love for yourself.
Because you have honoured your emotion,
This soft pink light can help with healing.
With your palms placed gently over your heart,
Say,
It's okay,
I understand.
With this extension of love you've given to your heart,
You can see that its colour starts to become slightly more vibrant.
Breathe in deeply again with more compassion than before and say again to your heart,
It's okay to feel sad.
Every ending offers a beautiful new beginning.
As you breathe,
Each breath expands this glowing light further and further until it is fully encasing and cocooning you.
You are safe.
You are health.
Allow your heart to begin slowly healing any cracks.
It is mending with the power of your loving words and as you bask in this healing pink light,
Repeat after me out loud or silently.
I know that healing is not linear and I accept the highs and lows that each day brings.
I lean into my emotions no matter how uncomfortable it makes me feel.
I release all these unrelenting painful thoughts and emotions.
I release feelings of shock and disbelief.
I clear feelings of betrayal and disappointment.
I choose to release anger,
Hurt and criticism.
I choose to let go because I can't control anyone but myself.
I know that this pain will ease and I will find joy in life again.
I clear any ill feelings and ways that I feel I have been wronged.
I release the shadows of my past.
I let go of the need to compare myself to others lives.
I release the need to convince myself it's not over.
I honor the love I shared.
I forgive myself for getting hurt.
I let go of my past regrets.
I release any resentment.
I release trauma.
I release any guilt from the past and present.
I did my best.
I am trying my best.
I will not let my past affect my future.
I am worthy of love even when my heart is hurting.
I deserve someone who chooses me every time.
I allow myself to take time for me.
I am worthy of deep and unconditional love.
I choose to be at peace with the way that things are.
I love and accept myself for exactly the person I am right now.
I am not afraid to reach out and connect to others.
I allow myself to accept and receive love for myself and others.
I show compassion towards myself and others.
I choose to love myself as deeply as I love others.
I deserve real,
Wholehearted,
Authentic love.
I trust that everything happens for a reason.
I trust that the universe is guiding me in the right direction.
I am safe,
Supported,
And rooted in the present moment.
I allow myself to find peace in solitude or with loved ones.
I choose to let go of my anxiety.
I release all fears of not being perfect.
I clear all the ways I feel so alone.
I am allowed to put myself first and prioritize my needs.
I am grateful for the lessons I have learned.
I nurture my mind,
Body,
And spirit.
I will use this time to return to loving myself.
I enjoy spending time with myself.
I will be gentle with myself today.
I deserve to be treated well.
I forgive myself.
I am thankful that I now know what I don't want.
I am allowing myself to let go.
I am ready to receive a deeper kind of love.
I trust the process of love and life.
I have so much to give.
I release grief.
I release worry.
I release fear.
I am surrounded by love and everything is okay.
I have faith there is a different plan for my love life.
I am free to be the best version of myself.
I am peaceful,
Healed,
Happy,
And whole.
I am attractive.
I am sexy.
I trust myself.
I am resilient.
I am strong.
I am valuable.
I am worthy.
I am beautiful.
I am enough.
I am whole.
I am patient.
I am loving,
Loved,
And lovable.
I will love again.
I am learning to trust the process.
I am grateful for the lessons and everything I've learned in my last relationship.
I attract positive and healthy relationships.
I am allowing myself to experience pure joy and laughter.
I am on my own timeline.
I am on my way to becoming the best possible version of me.
I am open to possibilities for my future,
One that I cannot even fathom.
I have the potential to experience love greater than I have ever known.
I am open to true love.
I am ready for my soulmate.
I can find happiness in any situation.
Everything that isn't meant for my highest good must leave.
Heartbreak only makes me stronger.
Every heartbreak I've endured has made me stronger.
A heartbreak leads to a breakthrough.
A greater love is waiting for me.
Everything is unfolding as it's supposed to.
My time for true love is coming.
This is just a stepping stone.
My heart is whole,
Healed and happy.
This relationship did not work out because there is a better match out there for me.
I trust that the universe will bring me my perfect match.
I am at peace with what happened.
It gets easier every passing day.
I am excited for what the future holds.
This is my fresh start.
I can find joy in any situation.
The best is yet to come.
My energy resonates with love,
Gratitude,
Forgiveness and empathy.
If you are ready to release your past,
You can move into a state of forgiveness and offer loving kindness to the one who hurt you or the one you hurt.
They were a part of your journey and not your destination.
As much as it may be difficult to accept,
They were a teacher and mirror reflecting back to you what you needed to face in your life at the time.
Each relationship is an opportunity for us to learn a lesson so we can identify and sever a pattern.
Each time we enter a relationship,
We have an opportunity to become a better version of ourselves.
In front of you is a small crackling fire pit a few feet away.
You may even feel the heat of the fire as you hover your palms over the flames.
Next to the fire is a pad of paper and a black marker resting on a tree stump.
If you aren't able to picture this,
You can do this at home after this meditation concludes.
Take a moment to write down who you want to let go of on the piece of paper and tear the page off.
Repeat after me out loud or silently.
I am grateful for the connection we once shared.
I recognize that blank was one of the many teachers and mirrors I will have in my lifetime.
I am thankful for what I have learned during this time.
This relationship was a pit stop along my journey through life but not the destination.
Now take this sheet of paper and fold it a few times.
Take a deep breath in and as you exhale,
Send it off with love.
Say I release you out loud as you toss the paper into the fire with good intentions for this individual and watch it dissolve.
By releasing them,
You free up space in your heart to invite more love in.
Take the time to journal about how you're feeling after this meditation session.
I invite you to listen to this recording as many times as it takes for you to let go and move on.
Be proud of yourself for taking steps to move through this hurt.
Before you know it,
It will be behind you.
But be patient and gentle with yourself.
Do not judge the length of your healing process as it is different for everyone.
Whatever you're feeling,
Honor it.
And remember to always replenish your cup before anyone else's so that you have more to give.
When you're ready,
Gently open your eyes.
Take a moment to just take in your surroundings again and remind yourself of how far you've come.
This is Su Li.
Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your healing journey and thank you for going inwards and trusting your heart.
Namaste.
