Buddha: 5 Ways To Let Go

The Buddhist teachings warn us of 5 main challenging and complicated mental states that block, confuse, or “hinder” our ability to more fully open our hearts and minds, and prevent us from discovering freedom from suffering. In this talk, Shell explores how we can use the practice of energy (or viriya, in Pali) to more clearly recognize these five mental states, and eventually loosen our grip on them and discover more joy, freedom, and ease. It includes a 15-minute meditation at the end.

Transcript

So I wanted to start this talk today by sharing with you the very first time I ever tried to meditate by myself,

Which was about 35 years ago now when I was in my mid-20s.

And back then,

I remember that I'd been reading a lot of beat poetry,

And so many of the writers that I was reading were expressing how meditation had brought them to a new spiritual understanding.

And so I really wanted to try this out for myself.

And at the time,

I was living in Newport,

Rhode Island in a big house with some old high school buddies.

And I remember that I had planned this out specifically to do it on a Saturday night,

Mainly because I knew that everybody else would be out and about on a Saturday night,

As they usually were.

And I remember sitting in my room and sitting cross-legged on a mattress on the floor,

And then I had lit some candles and I'd put on some kind of hypnotic music.

And for some reason,

I remember that I was in the Zen position,

Which meant I was staring at the wall with my eyes open and kind of watching the shadows flickering on the walls and waiting for something basically to kind of happen to me.

I really honestly thought that if I just sat there long enough,

Something mystical or magical was just going to happen.

Like maybe I would start floating or something crazy.

I remember thinking how much I really wanted something extraordinary to happen,

Something out of this world,

Out of body,

Something that would maybe take me to a place of complete and utter bliss,

Away from my pain and my struggles,

And then basically just keep me that way permanently.

Spiritual bliss without the spirituals,

Without the booze,

Basically.

And as you might imagine,

Of course,

Nothing at all happened.

But thankfully,

I still found myself drawn very much towards the teachings,

As well as to the teachers whose books I had also started reading.

Mainly,

I really wanted what they seemed to have,

And I wanted to know how to get it,

Which is one of the things that led me to Naropa University in Boulder,

Colorado,

Where very happily I ended up learning about Buddhism from the teachers and monks and nuns who were teaching there.

But when I first arrived,

What I very quickly discovered was that in order to get to that place of bliss that I was seeking,

I first needed to be super willing to go through a lot of what was not bliss.

So in other words,

Instead of teaching me how to go away,

Which part of me really expected,

My teachers were insisting that I be extraordinarily willing to stay and then apply a lot of actual effort and energy and persistence into examining the contents of my mind.

I also remember the teacher Gil Fronsdell saying that meditation practice is not for what he calls,

Quote,

Nightstand Buddhists,

Nightstand Buddhists.

What he meant by this is that,

You know,

We can all read a lot of books on the subject and listen to a lot of lectures and talks,

But if we're not actually willing to sit down with ourselves and actually do the practice,

It's really not going to bring us a lot of transformation or even a deeper understanding.

So along with effort and energy,

What I also learned was that this practice takes a lot of courage because what it is essentially asking of us is to very courageously face and confront our natural tendencies,

Which are to run away from ourselves and our problems or fight them or completely ignore them,

Drown them out,

Or maybe pretend that they just aren't there.

So one of the qualities that we are asked to very consciously nurture within ourselves is something called virya or energy.

And what I like to remember about the word virya is that the Sanskrit root of this word means hero,

Hero.

And in the Shambhala tradition that I was brought up in,

It is said that when we start walking on the path,

We are considered warriors.

And this is because what we're doing essentially is acting as warriors against the great forces of greed and hatred and delusion within ourselves or those three poisons,

Those things that create suffering within us,

Greed,

Hatred,

And delusion,

Or maybe wanting,

Not wanting,

And ignorance sometimes,

Those three poisons are called as well.

More specifically,

We are being asked to use our energy or effort to confront what is considered unskillful or unwholesome in the mind,

Along with what is considered skillful or wholesome,

Or those thoughts that are leading us towards suffering and those thoughts that are leading us towards happiness.

We really want to look at this.

In a famous sutta called the Two Modes of Thinking,

The Buddha said that before his awakening,

When he was practicing,

He noticed two tendencies within his own mind.

And I want to read from the sutta here.

First,

He would notice,

Quote,

Thinking imbued with sensuality or ill will,

Harmfulness has arisen in me.

And that leads to my own affliction or to the affliction of others or to the affliction of both.

It obstructs discernment,

Promotes vexation,

And does not lead to nirvana.

What he also noticed was that as he mindfully observed this kind of thinking with an awareness that it led to suffering,

That it would subside when he observed it.

Second,

He would notice that,

Quote,

Thinking imbued with renunciation or non-ill will,

Non-harmfulness has arisen in me.

And that leads neither to my own affliction nor to the affliction of others nor to the affliction of both.

It fosters discernment,

Promotes lack of vexation,

And does lead to nirvana.

And so very happily after his awakening,

The Buddha gave us some specific instructions on how we could also use our energy to practice in this way as well.

And he sorted these into what he calls the four great efforts or the four great endeavors.

And all four of these,

By the way,

Can be really honestly difficult for us to practice,

But they're also fairly easy instructions for us to understand.

And so I'll give you these four.

So specifically,

We're asked to do four things.

One,

We are asked to prevent the arising of unarisen,

Unwholesome states,

Prevent those.

Secondly,

We're asked to abandon unwholesome states that we notice have already arisen.

Third,

We're asked to arouse wholesome states that have not yet arisen.

And then fourth,

We're asked to maintain and perfect wholesome states that have already arisen.

So if you're interested,

I've given other talks on these four efforts,

Which you might find in the podcast.

But for this talk,

What I really want to focus on more specifically is the unwholesome states of mind that are often called the five hindrances or the fetters.

These are really important.

All five of these are really giant umbrella categories for all the ways that we hinder or obstruct our meditation practice.

And of course,

Also ourselves from developing our own hearts and minds.

And this development is called Bhavana in Pali.

And so when we're talking about transforming our minds,

It's actually vital that we pay really close attention to these five hindrances because they all point to our habitual ways of relating to ourselves,

To other people,

And to the world itself.

So they show us,

If you will,

What type of colored glasses that we're pairing out of.

These particular habits of mind that we tend to carry with us wherever we go,

Which of course,

As you might imagine,

Determines our level of happiness and unhappiness.

And so with these four great efforts,

Basically we're being asked to very consciously and deliberately weed out the unskillful thoughts or the hindrances and plant more of the skillful or wholesome ones.

One of my very favorite lines from the suttas is a reminder to us about this,

Which is,

Whatever a monk keeps pursuing with one's thinking and pondering,

That becomes the inclination of one's awareness.

And I'll repeat that.

It's so simple and so profound really.

Whatever a monk keeps pursuing with one's thinking and pondering,

That becomes the inclination of one's awareness.

Another phrase from the suttas that really helps me with this is when the Buddha tells us,

Set your heart on doing good.

Do it over and over again and you will be filled with joy.

I'll repeat that.

Set your heart on doing good.

Do it over and over again and you will be filled with joy.

There's also a line that came to me one night in a dream,

Which I will never forget and I always find helpful.

So I want to offer it to you.

What my mind told me in this dream was when your mind is filled with good,

You will know when you have wandered.

When your mind is filled with good,

You'll know when you have wandered.

So remembering again that these five hindrances are really umbrella categories for the more unwholesome thoughts or beliefs.

These five include desire or wanting,

The first one,

Ill will,

Aversion,

Resistance,

Or basically not wanting.

So you've got wanting,

Not wanting.

And then two other opposites,

Which are recesses and worry and sloth and torpor,

Those two.

And then the final hindrance is doubt,

Which is really the most difficult one,

Which I'll get to.

And if we really think about these five,

We might notice that we all experience at least one,

If not all of these,

Maybe many times a day,

Don't we?

Think about it.

Wanting,

Not wanting,

Restlessness,

Worry,

Sloth,

Torpor,

Doubt.

In meditation circles,

When we're experiencing more than one of these,

It's considered that we're having a multiple hindrance attack.

And again,

In practice,

It is our job to use our mindfulness skills to be on the lookout for these and to constantly notice if a hindrance or maybe more of them is present or not.

Is it present or not?

And the reason for this is that we really want to get to know these hindrances so that we can see exactly how they create suffering in our lives and how ephemeral and fleeting they are.

And this is why we do not ever want to get rid of our thoughts and to go to some place of bliss or nothingness.

Because if we don't take a good look at our thoughts and beliefs,

How are we going to get to know them?

How are we going to get to know what is creating suffering within us and what is creating happiness?

Really important.

So I want to briefly go over these five.

The first one again is desire or wanting,

Sometimes also called greed,

Which I don't necessarily love because greed has so many connotations to it.

Basically,

Our wanting is a desire for pleasure in all our senses.

So we tend to want pleasant sights,

Sounds,

Smells,

Tastes,

Body sensations,

And mind states.

So for instance,

None of us really loves to have a feeling in the mind of anger or envy or depression,

Et cetera.

We want the more pleasant states of mind.

So the first good thing to know about this one is that there is nothing inherently wrong with enjoying these sense pleasures or these pleasant states of mind.

Yay.

Nothing wrong with that at all.

Given the incredible struggles that we all face just by being human on this planet,

These are something we're actually invited to lean into,

To really enjoy while they are here,

While they are arising and passing,

Which they will.

This is not the problem.

The problem arises when we want these things to stay,

Right?

So when we're craving and coveting things or when we're thinking that life would just be so much better if we just had even more,

Or when we think,

If I just had that in my life,

My life would be complete.

In a similar way,

We can also suffer from the if only syndrome,

Which looks like if only I had the right job,

Right relationship,

Clothes,

House,

Personality,

Et cetera,

If only.

Again,

It's never really the thing that we're coveting,

But the amount of attachment to it that we have that creates our suffering.

It's the amount of energy that we're putting into something emotionally and mentally when we're really clinging.

And the main reason that the wanting line is so painful is that it doesn't allow us to be where we are because we are in essence grasping for something somewhere else,

Either in the past or in the future.

Just as for instance,

We can create the suffering of future wanting for ourselves just by wanting the next bite of something,

Right?

So maybe we're digging into a pint of Ben and Jerry's.

And as we're doing this,

We're really digging for that brownie that's way down in there and not enjoying the food or the ice cream that's actually in our mouths because we're thinking about taking that next bite,

Right?

So that's the suffering of future wanting right there,

Just in that simple thing.

Or we might even be craving for something from our past,

Which might sound like if only I've said or done that thing,

Or if only this person or those people had been different or done something different.

Or if only that time in my life could have been different.

So here it's grasping at something that didn't happen,

That isn't going to happen the way we think it should have.

And as many of us know,

Sometimes we can suffer with this one for decades because we just can't let go.

In the suttas,

The Buddha tells us,

Let go of what lies in the past,

Forsake what belongs to the future,

And in the present moment,

Completely dispel every wish and desire.

I'll read that again.

Let go of what lies in the past,

Forsake what belongs to the future,

And in the present moment,

Completely dispel every wish and desire.

So that's the first hindrance wanting.

The second hindrance,

Aversion,

Anger,

Or ill will is also considered a trickster like desire.

Because again,

It's another way of wanting something to be other than it is,

Or someone else to be other than they are.

And of course,

Wanting ourselves to be other than we are in the moment,

Or our lives to be different.

So for instance,

I suspect many of us can still get angry or maybe even furious about something that happened in the past and get angry about it maybe thousands and thousands of times,

Maybe even for decades.

We can also become furious about things that haven't even happened yet,

But we think might happen.

Or maybe what we think people are believing about us,

Or about what we think they're going to do,

Or how they're going to react or behave when it hasn't happened yet.

There are also emotions that we might not think of as an emotion,

But these two are based on not wanting or dislike.

These are emotions such as fear,

Judgment,

Boredom.

And the reason they're aversion is because again,

We're in some way rejecting the present moment as it is,

And we suffer in our resistance.

It's that old formula of pain times resistance equals our level of suffering.

Or sometimes I like to think about it as pain times the amount of our no equals the level of our suffering.

So I think we all know this one as aversion.

The third hindrance is called sloth and torpor.

And this includes a sense of laziness,

Dullness,

Lack of vitality,

Inertia,

Fogginess,

Sleepiness,

Maybe even a sense of depression,

Don't want to,

Et cetera.

And when we're in this place,

We just can't see clearly.

Everything is fogged over like we've taken a drug.

Sometimes it can feel like we're actually asleep or dreaming,

Especially in our formal meditation practice.

So with this third hindrance,

Sloth and torpor in practice,

When we investigate further,

It can mean many things,

Right?

So the first thing,

As you might imagine,

Is we might just be tired.

We might just be physically tired and the body needs some sleep and we hadn't noticed how tired we were until we actually sat down with ourselves and started paying more attention to the body.

Okay.

So it might just mean we're sleepy.

It can also mean maybe that we're procrastinating in some way,

Which is a sense of aversion,

Not wanting,

And the mind just kind of starts getting dull and lazy and foggy,

Et cetera.

Or we might be resisting something in some way.

Other times though,

If we take an even deeper look,

It might mean that there's something in our lives we just don't want to look at,

Right?

And the unconscious mind recognizes this and decides to go into a kind of mental narcolepsy,

Right?

Just decides to put us to sleep.

Don't want to look at that.

I think I'm going to sleep now.

And so this hindrance,

The third one,

Sloth and torpor,

Is another excellent one to really investigate further because it might not be what it looks like,

What it appears to be.

The fourth hindrance,

Which is the opposite of sloth and torpor,

Is restlessness and worry,

Right?

Although in my own experience,

I've sometimes experienced both at the same time.

This is when I'm worried and I'm tired,

Experiencing both.

Restlessness is maybe best described as like a fish flopping out of the water,

Right?

This is when the body just can be jumpy on edge,

Wants to bolt,

To get out.

It's like when you're up at three in the morning and just the covers and the sheets are getting all messed up.

You're just flopping around.

Maybe the mind is running over and over the same topic.

And restlessness is defined by things like worry,

Agitation,

Nervousness,

Anxiety,

Et cetera.

And just like with all the others,

Sometimes it can be really helpful just to name restlessness,

To see it more clearly.

So for instance,

We might just gently note in the mind,

I'm worried,

I'm afraid,

I'm nervous.

Or we might just simply note busy mind.

Mind is racing,

Busy mind.

Again,

Without any judgment,

Just noticing what's happening in the mind and the body and the heart.

And sometimes this can bring ease just by detaching a little.

So the final hindrance is doubt.

And this is actually the last one of the hindrances that the Buddha experienced right before his enlightenment.

And so it can often be the most difficult because when we are believing it and getting caught up by it,

Sometimes our practice just stops,

Right?

So maybe we're sitting and we just go get up and go do something else.

And if we're doing this over and over and we're new to practice,

Sadly,

Sometimes we get up and we just don't ever come back.

So with doubt,

We might have doubts about ourselves or our capacities.

And this stops us from getting deeper benefits and continuing with the practice.

So we might notice the doubt has arisen when we start doubting the practice or the teachings or doubting what we're supposed to be doing in practice.

Or maybe we even start doubting our teachers or maybe even the Buddha and we start thinking,

Well,

The Buddha just doesn't know what the hell he's talking about.

I'm going to maybe go try Sufi dancing or something instead.

And so that's doubt.

And traditionally,

There's a great analogy that can help us to remember how each of these hindrances keeps us from seeing clearly.

And that is of a pond,

Although sometimes the analogy is a bucket of water.

And the idea is that when we look into the water,

We can't see our reflection clearly when the hindrances are present.

Basically,

We can't see anything clearly,

Which is,

Of course,

A metaphor for the mind.

So with wanting or desire,

It's as if the pond was filled with dye and it's coloring everything we see and distorting our perspective and making that thing that we want just seem more colorful or exciting than it actually is.

With anger or aversion,

It's as if the water is boiling.

The water is boiling or agitated.

With sloth and torpor,

The pond has been totally overgrown with algae.

It's completely still.

Nothing's happening.

With restlessness,

It's as if the water is being stirred up by strong winds.

And without,

As you might imagine,

The pond is just completely dark.

It's like the mud has been stirred up from the pond's bottom and we just can't see anything clearly.

So how do we work with these hindrances?

The very first thing we need to remember that's important is to not suppress the hindrances because this is a kind of aversion.

And instead of learning from the hindrances,

We're just pushing them down,

Which isn't going to help anything.

The great Master Lao Tzu has a great way of describing how we work with the hindrances in practice without suppressing them.

It says,

Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear?

Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear?

So this kind of steady,

Calm patience is really important because if we're just wanting the hindrances to go away,

It's going to be just like plucking off the top of the weed,

But not getting at its roots.

So if we do it this way,

It's only going to be temporary,

Right?

So that dandelion,

If you will,

Is just going to rise up again and then blow even more seeds out into the yard of our mind.

And so while we work to weed out the false or unwholesome beliefs and replace them with flowers or the more wholesome beliefs,

If you will,

We also need to learn to do this with great kindness and to allow ourselves to be just as we are,

Just as we are.

So we need to apply the foundation of our practice,

The soil of our practice,

Which is metta,

Loving kindness,

And learn to see the hindrances as natural,

As simply conditioned from our past,

From all our his and her stories,

All the stories we've been told throughout our lives.

We also want to recognize the hindrances as ghosts and remember that they're ephemeral and that they only have power over us if we believe them and identify with the hindrances.

So we really need to remember that these are just energies that are passing through.

They do not define us.

We are not that.

One of the ways we can begin to work with the hindrances in our practice is to simply note them when they arise.

So for instance,

You might notice that you're wanting and just simply note desire or wanting or you might say,

I see you like you're saying hello to it.

I see you.

It's kind of like one of those solicitors,

Those door to door solicitors who come knocking,

Right?

We can just peer out of the window and say something like,

Hi,

I see you.

I see wanting hindrance or maybe wanting monster,

Et cetera.

And again,

Just like the Buddha practice,

Sometimes just this acknowledgement is going to make it subside or disappear,

Right?

Just like that solicitor might walk away when they recognize that you've caught onto it and you aren't going to buy their story.

If it is persistent enough though,

You might consider inviting the hindrance inside so that you can get to know it a little better,

Right?

And so here we can go right to the body,

Our home,

If you will,

And ask,

What is this desire?

Right?

So we might even look at its name tag,

Like it's a solicitor,

Right?

Look at its logo.

What is this desire?

We can also ask for instance,

What line are you selling me?

What line are you selling me?

Or how does sitting with this desire feel in the body?

Now we might consider what parts of the body are affected by it.

We can notice what it feels like in the tummy or how it's affecting the breath,

How we're holding the eyes,

How the heart feels,

Et cetera.

We might consider when this wanting is present,

Am I happy that it's here or do I feel somehow stressed or agitated?

We might ask the body,

Am I feeling warm and open when this wanting is here or does some part of me feel tight and closed?

It can be really telling.

We might also decide to have a more in-depth conversation with our guest,

Our wanting,

And ask ourselves what we might be believing about this desire.

So for instance,

We might ask if I don't get this,

What would that mean?

If I don't get this,

What will that mean?

Or maybe what am I believing will happen if I get that thing?

Or what am I believing about myself?

We can also consider what am I really wanting?

What am I really wanting beneath the initial wanting?

And finally,

We might consider,

Is it true that I don't already have what I'm really seeking?

Is it true that I don't already have what I'm really seeking?

And so as you might imagine,

We can investigate aversion in a similar way by just noticing it and noting anger,

Irritation,

Frustration,

Rage,

Et cetera,

That it's here checking out its name tag.

And then we notice what it feels like.

We get to know the aversion by again,

Going directly to the body.

And we could ask for instance,

Where in the body do I feel this aversion?

What is its temperature?

What is the effect on the breath?

How is it affecting the mind?

Maybe it really does feel like the mind or the body is boiling.

Anger especially is really fantastic for learning if we can stay with it because if we look more closely,

It can show us exactly where we're stuck or where we're clinging to beliefs and fears.

It's like a warning signal that lights up and shows us exactly where we're attached.

And of course,

Anger can also show us maybe that something's not right,

Nor that something needs to be done or something needs to be expressed.

So we don't want to act out on our anger,

But we absolutely don't want to suppress it or not investigate it.

We want to allow it to be here.

Really important.

So with the hindrance of sloth and torpor or in modern term sleepiness,

Again,

We can also start by noticing and naming it.

Maybe something like sleepy,

Inertia,

Don't wanna,

Whatever it is.

Again,

We start by going to the body,

Noticing what does the body feel like when it is under the influence of sloth and torpor.

Are there tendrils of fog,

The waves of fogginess,

Total fog,

Et cetera?

What does it feel like?

Then we might begin to investigate a bit and ask things like,

Is there something that I'm not wanting to look at right now?

Or are there any thoughts maybe that started making me feel kind of sleepy?

Or when exactly did I go away?

Or maybe simply does the body just need some rest,

Et cetera?

So we investigate.

And with restlessness,

We can again notice that head has arisen and name it something like busy mind maybe without becoming identified with it or beating ourselves up for it.

Or again,

Trying really hard to just make it stop,

Which is what we all tend to do.

So again,

We can go directly to the body and see if we can just be with it.

The teacher Jack Kornfeld suggests even saying something to ourselves like,

Okay,

I'm ready.

I'll be the first meditator in America to actually die of restlessness.

Because the idea is that it's not going to kill us really truly if we stay with it.

And finally,

What that fifth hindrance doubt,

We really want to be on the lookout here for trickster thoughts again,

Which can be like that little devil who's sitting on our shoulders and whispering into our ears things like,

See,

I knew you couldn't do it.

Or see,

You have no idea what you're doing.

Or,

You know,

This is just never going to work.

I'm incapable of doing this.

It's not going to work,

Et cetera.

And traditionally,

One of the best ways to conquer doubt is by doing the exact opposite,

Which is to lean into faith.

So for instance,

We can reflect on what the path has done for us so far,

Right?

Especially if we've been practicing for a little while.

We can also reflect on the hundreds of thousands of people on the path who have come before us,

Especially the great teachers and also some of the modern day teachers as well.

I know whenever I'm feeling doubt myself,

I often reflect on my own teachers and remember how kind and compassionate and joyful and wise they are and know that that is possible for me in my lifetime.

And I also,

When I'm feeling doubt,

Practice a lot of kindness and patience because I know that I am currently struggling again with some old habitual state of mind or some habitual belief.

And I'm stuck in the false belief that I can never get rid of this particular belief,

Thought or hindrance,

Et cetera.

So I practice a lot of kindness and patience with this.

I also remember how much that I've changed over the past 35 years and how much I really have worked with a particular belief and how much smaller it is.

Like maybe that frequent solicitor,

If you will,

Has become older and frail and doesn't stay for a week or months anymore,

But you know,

Sometimes just stays for a day or two,

But more often maybe just a few hours or minutes.

Or maybe I just see it passing by the house and I simply wave hello at it.

Hello,

I see you.

Old belief,

Et cetera.

And so when we're working with the hindrances,

The point really is again for us to use our energy,

Our virya,

To put a real effort into paying close attention to the mind and noticing when any of the hindrances have come to visit or have arisen,

Especially in our formal meditation practice,

Which of course will then hopefully bleed out into our daily lives.

And maybe as a kind of encouragement,

I want to say that over time,

The more we practice,

The more we might even begin to bow to the hindrances themselves whenever they arrive or show up and say thank you for this opportunity to grow and to open my mind and my heart.

So we eventually learned to bow to these really.

And there's a great story that I love about the spiritual teacher of Jerry Deaf who was leading a spiritual community in France.

And there was an old man apparently who lived there who was making everyone pretty irritated and angry.

This guy was just apparently rude and irritable and messy and basically unwilling to help with just about everything apparently.

So I think we all know this person,

Right?

And after many,

Many months of living in this community,

The old man apparently got really tired of living with all these people that he didn't seem to like very much.

And so he decided to leave and go live in Paris.

And when Jerry Deaf heard that this has happened,

He followed the man all the way to Paris and tried to convince him to return.

And as you might imagine,

The old man said,

No way,

I'm not going back there.

I didn't really like anybody who lived there.

And Jerry Deaf told him,

What if I paid you a big monthly stipend to come back and try again?

And so apparently it was enough money that the man said,

Okay,

Sure,

I'll come back and try again.

And when the two returned back,

The whole community was just,

As you might imagine,

Up in arms.

What are you doing to us?

They said.

We were all so thrilled and excited when he finally left.

And the spiritual leader just laughed and laughed.

And he said,

This man is like yeast for bread.

Without him,

You would never really learn about anger,

Patience or compassion.

This is why you pay me and why I hire him.

So I just love remembering that story whenever I'm thinking of the hindrances.

So if it's available and you're ready,

I'd like to invite you into a meditation on the hindrance of wanting.

And so as you're ready,

You might find a comfortable seat and posture.

Maybe starting right away with taking a nice deep breath in,

Slow breath out,

Becoming more embodied.

And if you're walking or driving,

You might also pay attention to the breath and also to the feet or to whatever you're touching,

Maybe the steering wheel.

Just to get more embodied and touch with the body moving through space and also touching the earth,

The steering wheel,

The seat,

Et cetera.

Starting to breathe and remembering to relax the body on each exhale,

Opening up the mind,

Heart,

Body to what's right here.

So you might notice whatever the hands are touching.

Allow the hands to be open,

Soft,

And a gesture of letting go and receiving.

You might let the shoulders drop,

Letting the tummy be soft,

Not held too tight.

You might notice the face.

Let all the skin around the head and the face soften,

Forehead smooth,

Eyes soft,

Teeth slightly parted so the jaw can relax,

Still breathing.

And as you're ready now,

I'm going to invite you to consider where the hindrance of wanting might be showing up in your life in a way that is causing you some frustration,

Suffering.

So for instance,

You might ask yourself,

What am I really wanting that I somehow can't seem to get or have right now?

Or maybe is there something in my life that I really wish were different?

Remembering that the wanting is in no way wrong.

It's simply our attachment to the outcome that is so often the cause of our frustration and suffering.

The wanting is in no way wrong.

See if you can really get in touch with that wanting,

Really be there.

And as you're ready now,

I'm going to invite you to explore where this wanting lives in the body and how it expresses itself there.

So you might start by noticing how the wanting lives in the tummy.

Is there wanting in the tummy?

You might notice how the wanting lives in the breath.

How does the breath feel when you're wanting?

You might notice how does the wanting live in the throat?

How does it live in the throat?

Maybe something you're not saying,

Something you wish to express,

Etc.

You might now consider how does this wanting live in the heart?

How does it live in the heart?

And if it's helpful,

You can continue.

As you continue,

You might consider when this wanting is present.

Am I glad that it's here or do I feel somehow agitated or stressed?

Or maybe do I feel warm and open or does some part of me feel tight or closed?

Just notice.

As you're ready now,

You might now ask yourself what you've been believing about this wanting.

So you might consider the question,

If I don't get this,

What will that mean?

If I don't get this,

What will that mean?

You might now consider if I do get this,

What am I believing will happen?

If I do get this,

What am I believing will happen?

As you're ready,

You might now consider when I am wanting this,

What am I believing about myself?

What am I believing about myself?

As you're ready,

You might now consider that this wanting is like one of those door-to-door solicitors and ask it,

What line are you trying to sell me?

See if you can really be open to hearing it.

What line are you trying to sell me?

As you're ready now,

You might consider looking even deeper and ask,

What am I really wanting?

Or maybe what is the deeper wanting beneath this wanting?

What's the deeper wanting?

As you're ready now,

You might consider asking,

Is it true that I don't already have what I'm really wanting?

Is it true I don't already have what I'm really wanting?

Remember,

There's no right or wrong answers,

Just an inquiry.

As you're ready,

You might consider,

How do I want to be with this wanting?

Would it be possible to greet it with kindness and compassion,

To have compassion for my own conditioning which is creating this wanting?

How do I want to be with this wanting?

Finally,

You might consider,

What would happen if I allowed my mind to be with this wanting?

Have myself to loosen my grip on this wanting?

Even just a little bit?

Finally,

In the last minute,

I'd like to invite you to imagine what it might be like to completely let go.

Even if you don't think that's possible,

Could you just for a minute imagine what that might feel like in the mind,

Body,

And heart?

If resistance arises,

See if you can allow that to be here and pay attention to that with great compassion.

Finally,

You might consider,

How do I want to be with this wanting?

Would it be possible to be with this wanting?

Namaste and blessings.

I hope you enjoyed this talk.

These talks are always offered freely so that no one is ever denied access to these teachings and your support really makes a difference.

Dhanah is an ancient Pali word meaning spontaneous generosity of heart.

If you feel inspired to offer Dhanah,

You can do so by visiting my website at www.

Mindfulvalley.

Com.

Thank you so much.

Reviews

Loved this …. A good reset for me ☺️

Thank you. This was very helpful, especially the meditation at the end. 🙏

Peaceful and instructive

Great topic as I become more involved, yet less attached. Namaste, ahimsa

I am left in awe and full of love after every one of your teachings. I am grateful. The doves in the background, close to the middle of this podcast, only made this one that much more beautiful of an experience. Thank you!

Really helpful and enjoyable to listen to. Thank you 🌟

Thank you. Many reminders with new insights. Understanding my wanting and desires of a certain aspect of life became clear with the end meditation. Thank you for the questions and guidance. I am thankful for this lesson today, you are a great teacher. Peace be with you.

Excellent many thanks