This is Leah Seguin Shinraku,
Therapist and mindful self-compassion teacher in San Francisco.
And this is the loving kindness for ourselves meditation.
This is one of the core meditations of the mindful self-compassion program.
And it will take about 20 minutes to complete.
In this meditation we'll be using phrases that you have likely discovered prior to this moment in the mindful self-compassion program.
These are phrases that you most deeply need to hear.
Words of wisdom and compassion that speak to you.
They might be really,
Really simple words.
Sometimes those are the most powerful.
And in more traditional loving kindness meditations,
We often say phrases that tend to be more focused on encouraging our loved ones or ourselves to be happy.
We often say things like,
May I be happy,
May I be well,
May I be free from suffering,
May I be safe.
And the compassion phrases are sometimes different because they are more focused on a loving response to suffering rather than an encouragement to be happy.
So just settle on a few phrases,
No more than four,
The words that you most need to hear right now.
And once you've settled on those phrases,
Please find a comfortable position either sitting or lying down.
As I said,
This meditation will take about 20 minutes to complete,
So you want to be in a position where you can feel at ease for that period of time.
And once you've found that comfortable position,
We'll begin.
So letting your eyes close,
Either fully or partially,
And taking a few deep breaths just to settle into your body and into the present moment.
Maybe release any tension that you feel in your body right now.
And then putting your hand over your heart or wherever it's comforting and soothing.
This is a reminder to bring not only awareness,
But loving awareness to your experience and to yourself.
It's a warm presence,
A warm mindfulness.
And now bringing your attention to your breath and feeling just where you notice it most easily.
That might be at your nostrils or the tip of your nose.
It might be in your belly or in your chest.
Just notice where you feel your breath.
And just bring your attention as your body moves in and out with the breath.
And when your attention wanders,
Just gently bring it back to your breath again.
The mind is going to wander.
That's what it does.
It isn't a problem if it wanders.
In fact,
It's a way to practice mindfulness and a way to practice mindfulness with a kind of warmth.
Just noticing where your breath is moving,
Maybe noticing the pace of your breath.
And then gently releasing your focus on the breath and just beginning to offer yourself the phrases that are most meaningful to you.
Opening your heart to these words,
Whispering them silently and gently into your own ear again and again.
In a way,
This can be your self-compassion mantra,
Personalized,
So specific for you,
What you need to hear right now.
Just as much as you can,
Allowing the words in,
Allowing them to fill your being the same way that your breath fills your being.
And allowing them to be true,
At least for this one moment.
And again,
Whenever you notice that your mind has wandered,
Just guide it back and refresh your aim by feeling the sensations in your body.
In a sense,
You're coming home to your own body in this moment,
Gently.
It's not a mistake if your mind wanders.
That's just what your mind does.
So you can come home to your body and then feeling the importance of your words,
Of the phrases that you've found for yourself.
Just coming home to a simple kindness that's here right now as best you can.
And if you have a hand over your heart,
Maybe putting your opposite hand over your heart just to kind of refresh and keep that soothing touch alive.
Or perhaps moving your hand to your belly or to your arm,
To your face,
Just noticing what feels most soothing right now.
Again,
With both your words and this soothing gesture,
You're bringing loving awareness,
Kindness,
Warmth to your experience as best you can.
You're bringing kindness to yourself.
Again,
If your mind wanders or if you notice that there's resistance to these phrases,
See if you can bring your warm awareness to that,
Even to the resistance.
Just noticing what's here,
How you feel,
Coming home to these sensations,
Coming home to your body,
Your present moment experience.
And then trying with your words again,
Feeling their importance,
Coming home to the kindness that's possible in this moment,
Whatever is possible in this moment.
And let these words just wash over you like a mantra.
Sometimes mantras are words that are in another language or they're even just syllables.
We don't know precisely what they mean.
There's a way that they can take us out of our judging mind,
The part of ourselves that's trying to figure things out and connect us to the kind of warm presence.
See if your words can be like that for you in this moment.
See if you can settle into the rhythm of their syllables,
These syllables that you've chosen that felt right for you.
Maybe that were your best guess about what was right for you,
What you most needed to hear.
See if you can let yourself be absorbed in this practice of just repeating these loving phrases,
The ones that are meant for you.
Allowing them in as best you can.
Allowing them to feel your being and allowing them to be true,
At least for this one moment.
And again you may notice that your mind wanders.
It's going to do that.
It's not a problem.
When you just notice that it's wandered then you just gently bring it back.
You can bring it back to the sensations in your body.
You can bring it back to your breath.
You can bring it back to your words.
With warmth and kindness,
Patience,
Knowing this is just what your mind is going to do.
You can keep guiding it back again and again.
Coming home to your body,
Coming home to this moment,
To these phrases,
These words you've chosen.
Again,
Allowing them in as much as you can,
Allowing them to feel your being,
Allowing them to be true even if just for a moment.
What's it like for these words to be true just for this moment?
And now releasing the phrases,
Just let them go for now.
They're always there for you when you need them.
And just allow yourself to rest quietly in your body.
Noticing how you feel right now.
Allowing yourself to be exactly the way you are.
And as you feel ready,
Gently opening your eyes.
.
