My name is Sadie and I'm a yogi in recovery.
The fourth step,
Making a searching and fearless moral inventory,
Can seem like a daunting task to any 12-stepper.
To sit face to face with the past,
To admit wrongs done,
And to begin taking down the walls of protection we've spent a lifetime reinforcing is enough to jolt anyone out of the present moment.
But it must be done if we are to recover.
However,
Let's not forget the inventory of assets,
The parts of ourselves we can hold in a positive light.
Cultivating an attitude of optimism and gratitude is essential in living a happy sober life.
This meditation is intended to bring to light an aspect of yourself you can keep coming back to,
Especially during your fourth step.
Find a comfortable seat somewhere that you can sit tall but not rigid so there's room for your breath to expand and start to close your eyes or lower your gaze.
Inhale and exhale through your nose and be keenly aware of the sensation of air against your nostrils.
When your mind starts to wander off into the past or the future,
Gently usher it back to the present moment by focusing on the air against your nose.
Begin to deepen your breath and with every inhale allow your belly to totally relax and go round.
Inhale all the way up to the top of your lungs and then exhale slowly.
Inhale fully and exhale slowly to calm and center your nervous system.
Inhale and exhale slowly to calm and center your nervous system.
Inhale and exhale slowly to calm and center your nervous system.
For the next minute or so allow your mind to travel to a time when you are of service to another.
It could be a person,
A pet,
Maybe a group of people,
Your 12-step group or your church,
Anyone who you've helped.
Inhale and exhale slowly to calm and center your nervous system.
If nothing comes right away,
That's okay.
Just be open to the idea.
Once you've called to mind a scenario,
Begin to recall as many details about the environment as you can.
What was the temperature?
What did it look like?
Was it bright?
Was it dark?
Were there any smells in the environment?
How did you feel?
Were there any words exchanged that made you feel good?
Take the next moment to recall as many of the details that you can.
As your mind scans over this memory,
Be aware of any physical signs that you may have.
As your mind scans over this memory,
Be aware of any physical sensations that arise here in the present moment.
Perhaps feelings of warmth or opening,
Maybe in the heart center or your belly.
Just notice there's no right or wrong.
There might not be any sensation,
But be open to it.
As you bring the memory of this positive situation into the present moment,
If you had to assign one word to your actions,
What would it be?
Some examples are authentic,
Calm,
Kind,
Loving,
Problem solver.
How were you in that moment or on that day that was helpful?
I know this activity can be difficult,
So I'd like to offer a word that is all-encompassing to anyone listening to this meditation.
If you've made it this far,
Then there's no doubt that you are a persevere.
So if you've had trouble coming up with your own word,
Borrow this one until something else arises.
Now stay focused on the word that you chose and silently repeat it to yourself as in a mantra.
Bring one hand to your heart center right over top of your sternum and one hand to your belly.
Continue to repeat your word over and over.
Anytime you're faced with a difficult situation or task,
Remember your word,
Remember your character asset,
And that it's always with you.
Namaste.
