Finding Refuge

There are many different things you can take refuge in. In this guided meditation with Rick Hanson, Ph.D., you will practice building a sense of safety and finding refuge in your daily life by identifying a variety of refuges, and internalize that into your own brain.

Transcript

So,

There are different practices of finding refuge and we're going to do a practice real soon.

In,

For example,

You can say the words in your mind.

Like I take refuge in my teacher or I take refuge in the knowledge that my mom and dad love me or I take refuge in science or I take refuge in God altogether.

And you could do this in your mind as well.

You can also kind of in addition to the language or perhaps deeper than language get a feeling for the refuge as if it's already actual inside you in some way.

Even if it's not as deeply embedded in you as you would really like,

You get a sense of you feel it.

You kind of feel it as if it were already present and it's kind of there and you're more in this way abiding as this refuge or feeling lived by it.

It also helps to do regular practices of finding refuge.

For a long time I made a commitment every day to take or find or rest in or abide as seven key refuges for myself and I wouldn't go to sleep without having taken refuge in that way.

Usually in the morning I would do it.

So,

You might think about that.

Maybe just one.

Just one that every day you consciously find refuge in or take refuge in and you could certainly add to your list.

And then as you experience refuge,

Help the idea of your refuge become more of an experience of it,

A feeling of it.

That's why the emphasis I'm placing on coming from or abiding as or being lived as is so useful because it helps us internalize a sense of refuge.

So we get those neurons firing together so we wire that sense of refuge increasingly into our own brain and grow a sense of refuge as one of the inner strengths we're trying to develop.

Okay.

So this was a relatively long presentation and because we had a lot of ground to cover,

At least I had a lot of ground to cover,

And now let's do more of a practice.

As with any sort of practice,

Adapt my suggestions to your own needs.

We'll go through this practice twice and feel free to explore different aspects of it as we do it.

As usual,

There'll be some periods of silence and any time if you want,

You can stop this presentation and just hang out longer with something that's helpful to you,

That's meaningful for you.

Okay.

So,

If you want,

And by the way,

If you're listening to this while driving,

Keep your eyes open.

And by the way,

Practicing finding refuge with your eyes open can often be quite helpful because much of the time when we need to find refuge or call up a sense of refuge,

It's in situations in which we've got to have our eyes open.

All right.

But right now,

If you want,

Or any time it's really helpful to you,

You can keep your eyes closed and really use that as a way to go inward.

All right.

So let's begin.

And as I said,

We'll go through this twice.

To begin with,

Bring to mind something that for you is a source of protection or sanctuary or you feel fed by or nurtured by this,

Or you feel lifted by it,

Buoyed,

It lifts your mood,

It lifts your outlook.

Or it could be something that inspires you.

There are many examples as we've covered.

People you take refuge in,

You could take refuge in your friendship or your love,

The two of you share,

The sense that this person is loyal to you,

Is on your side.

Perhaps the memory of certain places you've been in,

That could be a refuge.

Spiritual practice,

Religious faith can be a refuge for people.

Maybe it's just a feeling,

Some kind of really good feeling of wellbeing or gratitude or goodness.

Or it could be more abstract.

You could take refuge in a body of teachings,

Like a collection of wisdom about something that's been meaningful to you in your own life.

So choose a refuge and I'll refer to this as your refuge.

And then once you have a sense of this refuge,

We'll explore relating to it in four different ways.

In the first way,

Imagine going toward the refuge or entering into it more fully.

There could be a sense of arriving in it,

Sometimes described as taking refuge.

You can also get a sense of this refuge and the experience of it as already present inside you,

At least to some extent,

And it's something you come from.

It could be like coming from love or coming from wisdom or coming from the sheer knowledge of your mate loving you dearly.

There could also be a sense of abiding as this refuge,

Simply resting in it as a major quality present in your mind and you're just kind of hanging out.

When you could say if a refuge for you is a sense of some teacher that you've had,

You're just sort of abiding in the sense of relationship with that teacher.

Who knows,

You might even have a sense of that teacher in some way inside you or having been internalized in you in some way.

Abiding as that.

You might have a sense of abiding as a community of people,

A group of friends,

An extended family,

Athletic team,

In a sense of abiding as the camaraderie of that group of people.

Whatever your refuge is,

See if you can get a sense of abiding as it.

Last,

With regard to this refuge that you've chosen to focus on here,

And it's okay if your mind goes to more than one refuge,

See if you can get a sense of being lived by this refuge.

Maybe as if it's something carrying you along or maybe something flowing through you or buoying you,

Being kind of the wind at your sails.

Perhaps as if your living is a kind of expression of this particular refuge,

Whatever it might Okay.

And as you experience the sense of refuge,

Deliberately have a sense of it sinking into you.

As you sink into it,

You're keeping those neurons firing together,

So they wire together,

So they wire this sense of refuge into your brain,

Weaving it into your very fabric and therefore into your life as well.

So there could be a sense of this particular experience of refuge spreading inside your body,

Perhaps like a sense of warmth moving in you.

Or if the refuge is more conceptual,

Like an idea that you take refuge in or a knowing that something is true,

There could be a sense of a growing conviction about the truth of this important idea.

Okay.

So that was the first time through this practice and we'll do it again.

This time I'll say less and you can do it more on your own.

And you're very welcome,

By the way,

To choose one or more refuges,

Certainly at this point.

So to begin,

Choose a refuge,

Something that nourishes you or protects you or is a kind of sanctuary,

A safe place inside,

The experience of it inside,

Or if it's a safe place outside you or something that inspires you or lifts you up.

Choose a refuge.

Okay.

And once you have found it,

Explore different ways to experience it.

You could go to it or feel like it's already present in you and you're coming from it.

Or abide as it,

Be the refuge.

Let it be you.

You might have a sense as well of perhaps being lived by this refuge,

Kind of like giving yourself over to it,

Letting it be that which carries you on in your life.

There could be a sense in which your living is a kind of expression of this refuge.

And if you want,

You can imagine what it would feel like in various realistic settings that you're in,

Various relationships,

For example,

What it would feel like to give yourself more over to this particular refuge and let it be a more prominent factor in your mind so that how you are in,

Let's say,

That relationship is more of an expression of this particular refuge.

You can imagine that in a pretty felt and realistic way if you want.

And all the while as you're exploring refuge or different aspects of a refuge or different ways to relate to it,

Here too if you're exploring other additional refuges,

All the while there can be a sense of the experience of refuge sinking into you.

Maybe like I imagine a kind of golden dust sifting down into the deeper and deeper crevices of your own mind or maybe like a gentle rain coming down inside you or something spreading inside you or there can be just a knowing that this feeling of refuge is becoming more established inside you,

More of a reliable resource you can draw upon when you need.

So as you experience refuge here,

For let's say another minute or so,

Keep getting a sense of this feeling of refuge really sinking into you and really establishing itself inside you.

Okay.

Coming to an end here.

Okay.

Letting that sense of refuge reverberate inside you,

Letting it establish itself more as we finish this practice and come to the end of this presentation.

And knowing that as you increasingly internalize this feeling of refuge,

It will become something different refuges and the experience,

Different experiences of different refuges will become resources inside you that you can deliberately call upon,

Kind of activate or call to mind or pull up as it were or give yourself more over to as you need to as life is challenging.

And in fact,

With repetition and with habit,

Good habits,

The experience of a particular refuge that you need in a particular situation will increasingly automatically activate on its own.

So our final slide here really summarizes the territory of this pillar of wellbeing,

Which is to say as the godfather of American psychology,

William James wrote over a century ago,

The education of attention would be the education par excellence.

In other words,

If we train in attention and in particular that aspect of attention,

Which is sustained present moment attention,

Present moment awareness and mindfulness,

As we do that,

We become more fundamentally able to educate ourselves broadly defined in all kinds of ways,

Including that education,

Which is learning for life,

The development of inner strengths of many kinds,

Including the inner strengths that are the experiences of different refuges,

Which can help us in all kinds of ways,

Including this sense of refuge can help us sustain mindfulness,

Even what we're mindful,

Even when what we are mindful of is challenging or difficult or upsetting or disturbing.

So with a real wish that you grow the sense of refuges inside yourself and you find refuge in these growing experiences of refuge inside yourself,

I really wish you the best here with this pillar mindfulness in the foundations of wellbeing.

Reviews

I’d never experienced this “taking refuge in” something. It’s a wonderful, healing feeling. Thank you!

This meditation gives me such a great reassurance of my own inner strength

Such an important pillar for those raised in homes that caused them to be on their own emotionally! Thank you!

Thank you so much Rick, this was/is very powerful/grounding/helpful.
Thank you so much 💜🙏🏻

Thank you for my refuge.

Thank you for this teaching. Taking refuge in taking refuge

Thank You - I am finding this so helpful and am grateful to integrate it into my practice and daily life . 🙏🏻

Surprisingly useful and effective idea.

This was a helpful exercise in refuge manifestation that I intend to put into practice. Thank you.

Rick, my teacher, my confidant, my friend. I love what you have to offer the community.

-Diamond Heart

ar: Mindfulness.

I really enjoyed hearing about the various ways to experience refuge. As you mentioned several times, my mind shifted to different refuges, but I was glad that you gave a variety of examples, as this helped me to increase my repertoire of refuge options. I can see how these various options could work for different situations in one's life. I will listen again to reinforce the concepts. Thank you!

Wonderful brief talk and great guided meditation.

Wonderful! 💟☕️🎧☕️💟

I sometimes struggle with identifying a refuge when I practice iRest. This practice gave me the leisure to find and explore my refuge and left me with a sense of joy!

It is probably not good that I couldn't think of any. Lots to ponder.

Exceptional concept. Many thanks to Rick Hanson.

Nice, soothing get voice. Thanks!

Such a great tool!

Love this! Something I am doing daily, and Rick put into words. Also appreciate his friendly and kind voice. Thank you, Rick! 🙏🏻🌟