Progressive Muscle Relaxation

In this practice, Rick helps you relax your mind and body through a technique called Progressive Muscle Relaxation. This technique is a wonderful way to slow down excessive thinking and rumination, and creates awareness of your body, encouraging you to notice what it feels like to be tense vs. relaxed in the present moment.

Transcript

Hello and welcome.

I'm so glad you chose to join me today as we explore the glorious topic of relaxation.

The ability to relax has so many significant benefits.

Among them,

Better focus,

A deepened sense of presence.

It's difficult to be fully present in the here and now if you're not also able to deeply relax.

Deep relaxation aids in presence and presence can aid in deep relaxation.

They're really two sides of the same coin.

Relaxation is a wonderful antidote to stress,

To providing relief for anxiety.

A recent report from the American Psychological Association demonstrated that there's been a 50% increase in depression and anxiety in people under the age of 26 in the last 10 years.

That's incredible.

Well,

A beautiful antidote or at least part of the solution to that problem is this topic of relaxation.

Along with these other benefits,

There's an ability that comes with relaxation,

An ability to listen.

To listen to our own bodies,

To expand our capacity to listen to others and to simply be more receptive.

These are just a few of the powerful results of cultivating relaxation.

Love that word cultivation because there's some effort required on our parts.

Just like the gardener,

If you're going to have wonderful tomato crop,

You will have to tend to that soil.

You will have to condition it,

Provide the nutrients,

The water,

Plant at the right time of the year,

Tend to the garden,

To the young plant as it grows,

Keep it safe,

Protected.

If you do all those things,

You still might not have great tomatoes,

But there's a pretty darn good chance you will.

As you become more skilled at this process of cultivation,

It really doesn't have to be hard,

But proper cultivation takes time and some consistency of effort,

Which I will refer to again.

In fact,

I think I would go as far to say that learning how to relax may be the single most important skill you will ever learn.

That's worth repeating.

Learning how to relax may be the single most important skill you will ever learn.

So today we will be practicing a simple body scan and then moving into a technique called progressive muscle relaxation.

This technique was developed by American physician Edmund Jacobson and presented first in 1908 at Harvard University.

And like most techniques,

As I said before,

Consistency over time is strongly suggested to experience the best results.

As always,

Before we begin,

I suggest incorporating the four essential attitudes of gentleness,

Patience,

A sense of humor,

And curiosity.

Now intuitively know that relaxation cannot be forced,

But we can simply set the gentle,

Patient,

Smiling intention to relax.

And then we can begin to the best of our ability to trust that that process will happen.

Unfortunately,

The technique you're going to learn today has been used hundreds of thousands,

If not millions of times,

Clearly a staple of cognitive behavioral therapy and one that I've been using now for close to 30 years,

Not only for my own benefit,

But for the benefits of the people I've worked with in that period of time.

Now traditionally progressive muscle relaxation,

The sessions are about an hour.

But in today's fast paced society,

And how it can feel like an eternity because so many of us feel like we just don't have time to maybe even engage in a daily practice.

And as a person who has owned a business for some time,

Who has a family,

Who's raised four children,

I think I kind of get that the pressures of life,

Making money,

Paying mortgages,

Bills,

All the things that most of us have to do,

The scramble that we're in.

Given those constraints,

We make adaptations.

So one adaptation that we're going to do today is I'm going to limit this session to less than 50 minutes.

But I think in that time,

I can provide you with a strong foundation to either extend to a longer time period if you have that luxury or choose to prioritize this technique in that way,

Or you can shorten the session as you desire.

And I also prefer to do this in most practices outside with the support of nature.

Now outside could be at a park by a tree or a stream that you like in your backyard,

It could be in your balcony gazing up at the sun.

And you don't have to do this outside.

But I do like practicing outside with the support of nature because we are natural beings.

We are a part of nature.

We are not separate from nature.

Now we may feel disconnected,

But that's not the reality.

We're organic.

We're made of the earth,

Wind,

Fire and water element,

Just like all of the rest of life.

And there's something beautiful and healing about experiencing the solidity of Mother Earth under our feet,

That connection.

There's really no separation.

We are connected to our true Mother.

We're connected to the plants,

The trees breathe with us and the gentle symphony of the birds overhead,

The breeze,

The smells,

The vibrant colors to support our practice.

So whether inside or out,

We're going to begin this practice with a seated upright posture.

So why don't we just say a chair or a bench.

So in general,

Some simple guidelines for establishing a seated practice.

The feet are in front of you with the legs forming roughly a 90 degree angle.

Back is upright,

Not leaning against the chair,

But supported by that force that science is now calling levity.

That force that rises us upwards like the trees.

We're rooted in the earth,

But we grow towards the heavens.

Interesting why we grow up when gravity is a force that presses down.

Well,

This force,

I've been told is called levity.

And I love that word.

So the back is straight,

But relaxed,

Not super tight.

The head is also upright.

You can do this practice with your eyes open.

Traditionally it's done with your eyes closed and your hands simply resting naturally on your thighs,

Legs just about the width of your hips.

So that should give you a pretty solid posture.

There's no need to overthink your posture for now.

Just a general upright.

Chögram Trümpa Rinpoche refers to this posture as a regal posture.

I never thought about sitting up straight in a relaxed way as regal,

But it's kind of nice to think of it that way.

So all of us are aware.

We all have awareness.

Are you aware?

Yes.

Are you aware of my voice?

Yes.

Are you aware that you're sitting down?

Yes.

And you can begin by sending your awareness,

That part of you that simply knows,

Can begin by sending your awareness to your feet.

And don't have to think about your feet.

Don't have to notice anything in particular.

Just be aware of your feet as they're resting on the ground,

On the earth,

On the surface below.

And just take a couple seconds to just be aware of your feet.

Now to the degree you can,

Allow that awareness to simply move to the lower leg area,

To the area of the calves,

The shins.

And take a moment just to see if you can place awareness there.

If you can realize or know,

Or to sense or to feel anything in the area of your calf or your shin.

And if you can't,

It's perfectly okay.

You may notice sensations.

You may notice heat.

You may notice warmth,

Coolness.

It's really not that important for our purposes now as we're learning how to direct our awareness.

But over time,

You might find that you can easily,

Anytime you want,

Direct awareness to any area of your body,

Just with a little practice.

So now let's move that awareness to your knees.

And now to the upper leg,

The thighs,

Hamstrings,

Simply aware of that part of your legs.

And you might even sense moving,

Some of the pulsing of energy,

Or chi,

Which is another word for energy or vital force that we all have.

That energy that sustains all of life,

That's shared with all of our family in nature,

Both human and animal,

Plant,

Lovely trees that I'm looking at,

Out our office window in central Florida.

Now the area of the groin and the buttocks,

Just simply sending awareness there.

And now moving to the abdomen.

I was speaking with my teacher,

John P.

Milton,

About the abdomen,

And he made a very astute and profound observation.

He said,

You know,

The first thing we do is we cover our feet and then we cinch them down.

And then sometimes we even put huge heels on us to make us contract and be awkward and to be even further separated from the earth.

Then we take a literal belt and we cinch it around our waist,

We suck in our stomach,

We tighten it,

We put ourselves into a place of contraction.

And then for men we finish it off by putting a noose around our neck and then cinching that sucker up.

Well,

Man,

When you put it like that,

It seemed a little bit crazy.

So here we're sort of doing the opposite.

To the degree you can,

And hopefully without a lot of judgment or body consciousness in a negative way,

See if you can just send awareness to your abdomen.

And if your abdomen's really tight and contracted,

Which it likely is,

It's okay.

Again,

Gentleness,

Patience,

Sense of humor,

Curiosity.

You can set the gentle intent to just simply relax our abdomen,

Relax our stomachs.

Send your awareness there.

Be aware of your abdomen.

Maybe set the gentle intention to simply relax the abdominal area.

Now moving up the body,

Send your awareness to the chest.

There's often a lot of tightness and contractedness in our chest around our heart area.

As you send awareness there,

There may be some tenderness.

You may feel nothing at all.

Either way is okay.

Right now we're just learning how to send awareness,

Maybe even a gentle smile to our hearts.

Thank you for working day and night for me.

I have sure not always been the best caretaker of you,

My dear heart,

But I sure want to do better.

I'm noticing you and sending my awareness to you with an attitude of gratitude.

And then the area of the back,

Starting with placing the awareness on the lower back,

Moving the awareness to the middle back,

Simply noticing,

Simply aware,

Relaxing.

Now to the upper back.

Moving up to the shoulders,

Sending awareness to the shoulders.

I think it's safe to say that most of us hold tension in the shoulders.

No need to judge that.

Simply notice.

And right now we're taking good care of our shoulders.

Replacing our awareness on our shoulders.

We can gently smile to our shoulders.

We can be thankful that we have shoulders.

Moving up to the neck,

Same ideas.

Rising,

Force of levity moving through the face,

Lower jaw,

Middle of the face,

Eyes,

Forehead,

Top of the head.

Awesome.

So now let's begin some simple progressive muscle relaxation.

You can begin by opening your eyes really wide.

Not trying to strain anything here.

Not trying to pull a muscle.

Let's not do that.

But enough so that you're really feeling what tightness is.

Just open your eyes really wide and notice what tightness feels like in your eyes.

Notice the sensations.

And when you're ready,

Just simply relax that tension.

Letting go.

Putting down.

Now to the degree you can,

Let's go ahead and tighten the muscles in the neck.

You might be making a pretty weird face at this point.

Might want to do this in a place where people aren't watching you.

Or maybe you want people to watch you.

Either way is fine.

But right now I'm by myself in my office and I think that's a better place to do this than in a crowded restaurant maybe.

Tightening the muscles in the neck.

Noticing what tension,

Contractedness feels like.

And when you're ready,

Let that go.

Great.

Now I'd like you to lift up your shoulders.

Lift them up like you're trying to touch your ears.

Again,

No need to go crazy here to over strain.

But just lift them up and notice.

Just simply notice what tension feels like.

And then as you let that go with a sigh,

Simply notice the difference.

All of this is helping you connect more deeply to listen,

To be aware of the difference between contractedness and relaxation.

Very important foundation piece to learn how to master relaxation.

Let's do that again in the shoulders.

Lifting the shoulders up towards the ears.

Noticing the tension.

And when you're ready,

Just letting it go.

Now with your arms at your side,

You may want to just bend them like you're about to do a bicep curl.

Like you're about to lift something with both hands.

And just simply pull your arms back.

So in pulling your arms back,

Straight back behind you,

You can notice tension in your chest,

Your upper chest,

And your upper middle back.

Notice what tension feels like.

Let it go when you're ready.

Let's do the same thing with the abdominal muscles.

Just gently squeeze them.

Create some tension there.

Flex those muscles a bit.

Notice the tension.

Notice what it feels like.

What the sensations are.

And let that go.

Now let's go ahead and work on the upper legs.

You can simply just lift your feet off the ground if you're able to.

And just hold them up in the air.

Feel what tension feels like in the thigh,

Maybe in the hamstring,

Maybe a bit in the buttocks,

Possibly the abdomen.

And let them down back to the ground,

Supported.

Notice the difference.

Let's do that one one more time.

Lifting your feet off of the floor,

Or the ground,

Or the earth.

Noticing the tension.

And when you're ready,

And I do like to do it with the side,

Just let those go back down.

Great.

Now let's,

Let's pay some attention,

Some loving,

Mindful attention to our calves.

Simply lift your heels off the ground with your toes on the ground.

Notice tension in your calves.

Let them go when you're ready.

Let's do it the other way now.

Lift your toes,

Keep your heels on the ground.

Notice the tension.

And when you're ready,

Just simply let it go.

So I think that's good for now.

Now obviously,

We did this exercise very rapidly.

But as I said before,

I think this will provide you with a really nice foundation.

You can move more rapidly,

More slowly.

Sometimes as I notice tension throughout the day,

I'll just simply lift my shoulders up to my ears.

Notice the tension,

Let them go,

Notice the difference.

And we do that two,

Three,

Four times,

Just to keep that body mind connection going,

To keep the practice going.

That might take 30 seconds.

But in that 30 seconds,

My attention is going inward.

I'm developing some level of samadhi,

That ability to focus in.

My mind and my body are becoming aligned.

And if I remember,

On the exhale,

I like to smile.

So I smile to you,

And thank you for listening.

Reviews

Perfect! I used this to help me relax better before bed. Bet I'll be back! I feel like butter.

I was caught in the throat, stomach and chest so tightly, this brought tears of relief.
My family (and again, myself) cannot thank you enough. This hit so many levels of YESSSSS. The audible sigh with a smile are maaaagic.

Really helpful practice. Very well explained. Calming voice. Thanks so much.