Reflect & Practise: When Times Are Tough (Shorter Version)

This is for when times get tough. Reuben guides you through a reflective theme of working through this. It also includes a practice of working with resistance and contraction. It moves into a breathing technique that Reuben calls 'The Push'. This is to soothe the nervous system.

This is the shortened version. The full one is also available. PLEASE NOTE: there are reflections and insights revolved directly around your struggle which may evoke strong emotions. Please consider this first.

Transcript

Welcome to this practice.

This practice is for when times get tough.

My name's Ruben.

Relax,

Settle,

Give yourself the right to be here right now.

You need you in this moment.

This is a gift for you and from you.

Let's do this.

In this very moment,

Right now,

You are safe.

Allow this to be absorbed.

Notice what that's like.

Here you are in this moment.

It didn't happen by accident.

You've come here for a reason.

You've come here for your own well-being.

To this safe space right now with me,

Thank you.

Take a moment to thank yourself too for this safe space that you've created.

What do you need in this moment?

Is this about being more centered?

Is this about enhancing your well-being?

Is this about being more compassionate?

Or just having a space to process what's going on?

And maybe it's a combination of some of these.

And as you reflect on this,

Note your intention here.

What is your intention?

Notice this.

Notice what happens when you do.

Right now,

You are here.

And right now,

Times are tough.

You're going through something that has got you to this very point and brought you to this very experience with me right now.

So what about you in this moment?

What is it that's troubling you?

What is it that brings on a sense of contraction within your body and mind?

See what it's like to hold your body gently as you start to become familiar with the story that appears before you.

And as you do this,

Take a moment to observe as you do so.

Notice the commentary from your mind.

Notice any sensations.

Notice any emotions.

And here you are,

A witness to all of this in this moment.

And then you'll get pulled back into the commentary again.

And then,

With the power of noticing,

You take a step back and observe them once more.

So life is like a roller coaster.

Sometimes we're pulled into reactions driven from fear.

This fear causes a contraction within us.

Sometimes it's obvious.

Sometimes it's so subtle that it may take a good friend to notice something different about you.

When we go through tough times,

It's hard for us to acknowledge anything else that isn't part of the story in our minds.

But even going through this,

There are these moments where we find ourselves taking more conscious action,

Driven through being a little bit more open and receptive to things in life,

No matter how small they are.

A smile and a casual chat to the elderly person across the street who rarely has any contact.

Truly listening to a child that yearns for meaningful connection by tuning into their mannerisms and noticing the tone of their voice as they explain something exciting to you.

These actions give us a sense of meaning and purpose.

This causes an expansion within us.

Sometimes it's easy to expand.

Sometimes it's really hard.

This is where the practice comes in.

In this moment,

Simply let go and see if you can bring on another perspective here.

This perspective right now,

From where you are noticing,

Right now as you are in this very moment,

Come to recognise that all is well in your immediate surroundings.

The present moment will nurture you if you let it.

You are safe right now.

And even more so when we leave this period of reflection and move into the practice for today.

Notice what it's like to gently state to yourself right now the following words.

There is no need for resistance right now.

In this very moment,

All is well.

Allow this to be absorbed.

You can adapt these words as you wish.

Deep down,

Your history will tell you that in any periods of darkness that you've experienced,

You've had the capacity to get through it.

You've had times of struggle within those dark times,

But you've also had glimmers of acceptance,

Joy,

Contentment,

Hope,

Or something else whilst going through a time of struggle.

And when you experienced these little glimmers,

The actions you took at the time were solely from your own efforts.

You moved towards the kind of person that you want to be,

Even in the adversity of it all.

And then of course,

There were the times when it seemed as if you were going backwards,

Getting swallowed up in the darkness once more.

Our minds are programmed to be on the outlook for fear.

We're human.

You are not alone.

We all have minds that do this.

And then there were those golden steps forward again,

Offering you glimmers of light once more.

As you did this,

You noticed that things changed before you,

As the world brightened up in front of your very eyes,

Just like it will again.

At that time,

Maybe you got to a specific point that you remember,

Where another person helped you along the way.

If so,

Who was that?

Maybe it got to a point in your life where you felt like you were the only person that properly understood you and your circumstances.

And even though you were the only person at that time that properly understood,

Despite this,

You kept going.

If this resonates with you,

Get a sense of what that was like then,

As you kept going,

Whether you were helped by someone or whether you did this on your own,

As you continued to move forwards when you saw the light at the end of the tunnel,

Those little golden moments that brought the light towards you.

But here you are right now.

And right now,

Things are really tough.

There's no denying this.

Sometimes to soften our outlook on a tough situation,

It can be helpful to open up to other perspectives.

This is not to deny this tough time,

But to shed light upon it.

What is this period of darkness telling you about what matters?

What is this darkness illuminating to you?

What are some of the smallest things in life that give you a sense of meaning and purpose whilst in this dark period?

What does this period of darkness tell you about your inner strength?

The times when you have found yourself more centered,

More rational,

Calm and connected to the world,

Despite going through this tough time.

Now let go of reflecting.

Now is the time to practice.

And this particular practice is one that I use for when I'm feeling overwhelmed.

And by sticking to this for a set amount of time,

It works every single time.

Let's move into this practice together so you can focus on the practice when you need it,

Instead of giving excessive attention to something that doesn't nurture your well-being.

This one technique that we will be solely focusing upon.

Give it a try.

You can always choose to focus upon your favorite point of connection if this doesn't resonate with you,

But give it a go.

It usually takes a few minutes to get into it.

This is what I call the push.

Feeling the flow of gravity to gently hold you in this position and gently assist this process of relaxation as you feel your body relax more and more and more.

There's no need for resistance.

Right here and now you are safe.

Let's get into this practice.

This is it.

Take attention to your out-breath and just notice how gentle your out-breath is.

Just becoming familiar with only the out-breath,

Nice and easy.

What are some of the finer details that you notice in just taking attention to your out-breath?

And as you notice your out-breath,

What I'd like you to do is to just give a gentle push at the bottom.

Just a touch.

No need for excess effort.

If somebody was sitting right next to you and looking at you,

They wouldn't even know you were doing this.

Just a gentle push at the bottom.

Just a touch more air than you would usually.

It requires a miniscule amount of effort.

When we're practicing mindfulness of the breath,

We allow the breath to do what it will,

To have its own rhythm and pace.

But what we're doing now is just going to get into the push at the bottom.

Noticing your out-breath and very,

Very gently,

Very gently just giving a little push at the bottom.

Getting into this rhythm.

You're making this rhythm.

You're creating this rhythm in this moment.

So you're taking control very gently of just the push at the bottom of the out-breath.

Feeling gravity assist your diaphragm as you just gently give a push at the bottom each time.

This is the only thing that matters in this moment.

This is the practice.

Stay with this gentle push.

Allow my words to just gently flow through you whilst you maintain your main point of focus.

Beautiful,

Gentle push at the bottom.

This push at the bottom is everything in this moment.

Every time you give that gentle push at the bottom whilst you're doing so,

Your heart rate drops significantly by about 20%.

And then it gently returns to normal again.

And then as you focus on the out-breath and give that gentle push at the bottom,

It slows once more.

This is soothing your nervous system.

And what we're going to do is just keep doing this until the rhythm becomes more familiar,

More automatic.

It feels different to start with,

But just continue and notice how the more you do this,

The easier it gets and you soften to it.

Stay with this push.

Allow my words to just gently flow through you whilst your main point of focus is this push.

The more you get used to this,

The more natural this new rate and rhythm of your breathing becomes.

And relax.

If you find yourself getting caught up into the world of thinking again,

Come back to that gentle push.

Come back to the fact that gravity is gently holding you in this position.

Come back to the fact that you are safe and you are nurtured in this very moment.

This is it.

The push.

We just stick with this.

Repeat this process until we are much more expanded,

Relaxed,

Open and relaxed.

Staying with this push and committing to be with this push will do this.

It's just a matter of time and bringing in the power of noticing as you do so.

What a gift.

You have taken the steps to shift your perspective and align with being centered,

Grounded,

Expanded in this very moment.

Life is unfolding around you now.

You are the witness to everything.

You are the blank canvas.

Your awareness is like a blank canvas that experiences all of your five senses of sight,

Sound,

Touch,

Taste and smell.

As well as the thoughts,

Feelings and intuitions you have.

Allow my words to just gently flow through you whilst you maintain this point of focus on the push.

You may notice now that this rhythm of your breathing has become more automatic and is more gentle and slow thanks to gently making this push your main agenda at the bottom of your own breath.

In times of need it takes practice and this practice takes commitment.

There's no specific time frame to this or remedy that suits everyone.

But if this has resonated with you today,

Practice the push.

Or something else that you've been drawn to.

In putting the practice in,

Just like you have now,

You don't just get the benefits of doing it there and then.

You are benefiting your future self and strengthening your capacity to be centered,

Grounded,

Which enhances your capacity to pull through for

Reviews

Loved everything about it…the voice, music, validation, the push practice and its grounding impact. Thank you

Great connection with Reuben in this session. Thanks for teaching me “The Push”. 🙏🤗

I am always seeking out a reason to keep going, this one was my reason for today! Thank you 🙏🏾🧘🏽‍♀️✨

This was incredible Reuben ! There was no live tonight, so I figured I’d do a Live meditation…. And this one I’ve never heard before. Some of the things you said really hit home. I’m so glad I listened. It gave me glimpses of hope that I haven’t had in a long time, and I realized although I’m not where I’d like to be, this time I listened to MY intuition, I chose MY way, and I have that knowing I’ll be ok. I didn’t take the easy way out. Wow, I’ll be listening to this a lot, let it really sink in. Sorry so long, just so happy. Thank you Reuben. ❣️🙏🏼😊

Very helpful
I’ll listen again, as some issues need extra work.
Thank you 🙏 for your guidance 💖💖💖

I have a crazy times and your meditation helping me to find courage to remain strong and remove which no longer serves me. We need more people like u in this sad and divided world!! Thanks Reuben!!

Something completely unexpected and yet so rewarding. Thank you. In times like these, this is such a tremendous help.

There seems to be a theme to my meditations!
Thank you Reuben

Lovely! Thank you 💞🙏 It's great to have dfferent breathing techniques and this one resonated with me and my mind and heart beat slowed down. 🌟 Thank you also for sharing your compassion💞

Relaxing and calm, just what I needed after a busy day...namasté 😇

I found this to be one of my favourite mindfulness meditation which I Highly RECOMMEND to ALL 💚
In combination with the tranquil background soothing music, and Reuben's topic of content along with gentle yet calming guidance: Absolutely Ace, love ya work and many thanks 🙏

I became very emotionel during this meditation, but it was just what I needed to free myself. 🌻
I will surely do the long version to get used to the push.
Your worths are very supporting and true.Thank you so much. 🙏❤️

A great practice to get centered during these very difficult times

SO amazing thank you a million times over Reuben 🙏 without even realizing I needed to, this helped me release some sadness & reach a new level of healing. It’s reminded me of my inner strength & provided peace. The practice was very powerful, I am so grateful 🙏

Thank you Rueben🙏 hope you are well 🌟

Thank you for this practice! It brought me through deep emotions but by the end of it, I was calm and grateful for being in the present moment. I highly recommended this!

wow - i have never experienced anything quite like this. even as i write this my energy feels completely different. the silence even more silent somehow. i cannot thank you enough for this practice and guidance. through tears & breathing i am reminded of everything i already knew. I cannot recommend this enough and will certainly be coming back to it again. the push is forever imprinted on me! so much gratitude 🙏🏼✨🌬🤍

Love your work Reuben! It’s great to be here! I hope you’re taking care of you!

Excellent practice. Highly recommend.

Absolutely exceptional and the perfect meditation for me at this moment. I received some stressful news today and felt a bit like I was suffocating under the weight of it all. Scrolling through new meditations here I came across this one and I’m so glad I did. The Push is a unique and very effective breath technique and I plan to do this meditation or the longer version again tomorrow, as many times as necessary, until this current crisis has subsided. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Reuben, for this help. 🙏🏻❤️