Persevering in the Face of Obstruction

Reading of an Ajahn Chah talk relays some of the degree to which even Ajahn Chah struggled in the beginning, both the empathy and instruction are heartening.

Transcript

People looking a bit more fresh today than yesterday,

Getting used to the schedule,

The rhythm,

The place,

And slowly making these efforts to wake up,

Wake up,

The mind becomes a little more clear,

It's like this rain washing the dust out of the sky,

Our efforts to be mindful,

Clearing away some of the fuzziness,

Cloudedness,

Confusion.

I was just remembering this morning,

Last time I was in Penang,

In some respects it doesn't feel that we're in Penang,

It feels like we're above Penang.

Anyway,

18 and a half years ago I had an interesting experience,

In fact I almost gave up on becoming a monk right here in Penang.

I almost went back to Australia instead of back to Thailand.

Because in the old days,

Before the border of Laos was open,

There were people who wanted to become monks at Wat Anachat,

Used to come to Malaysia to do their visa.

I think it's a 20 hour train ride from Bangkok,

Coming down to Butterworth,

And you start to catch a ferry.

And I used to love coming to Penang actually,

Because great food.

You could eat this Indian thali on the banana leaves,

And they'd keep putting more on until you were full.

And then you could go and eat Chinese cakes.

And it was really lovely to see all the different religions living together in harmony,

So there's the old Chinese ladies waving their joss sticks,

And then you've got the Muslim calls of prayer,

And for someone who grew up in Australia.

See my parents didn't allow me to go to religious studies.

I was in the library with the Jehovah's Witnesses.

In some respects I think I wanted a religion,

Having a probably a faith character.

My parents had had somewhat abusive experiences in Christian institutions,

So they didn't want us to have a Christian education.

So we were banned from religious education.

And they said to us,

My parents said,

If you want a religion,

You can choose one yourself once you become an adult.

Which is I guess what I did,

And they're a bit surprised.

But anyway,

I loved,

What I remember loving about Malaysia and Thailand was the rich devotional life of the local people.

So what happened was,

What Nalachat is quite complicated for Westerners to become monks in Thailand,

Is this ritual that you have to go through to get your non-immigrant visa turned into a religious visa.

So it represents requires several letters from several departments.

And so when you come to the embassy,

If everything is gone as planned,

The letter with your name on it should be in the embassy.

And then they give you your three months non-immigrant visa that can be extended once you get back to Thailand.

So what happened was,

Basically it ran out of money as well.

And I was coming for the second visa run and my name,

My letter wasn't there.

So I checked into the Malaysian Buddhist Meditation Centre.

So I wait for the letter.

The Malaysian Buddhist Meditation Centre is based on the Mahasi method.

So I think it was 12 or 13 hours a day of sit,

Walk,

Sit,

Walk,

Sit,

Walk,

Note,

Note,

Note.

So I did that for two weeks.

And then I went and I checked and my visa letter still wasn't there.

So I went back for another two weeks,

Sit,

Walk,

Sit,

Walk,

Sit,

Walk.

It's good practice.

And I went back for the visa letter and it still wasn't there.

And so I didn't know what to do so I went to the old Indian part of Georgetown and I had some curry.

I remember I was sitting in front of this,

One of those wonderful,

Gaudy Indian temples with all the gods,

You know,

Those towering temples with all the devas and all the gods and lots of pigeons.

And I remember thinking,

It's a sign.

It means that I'm not supposed to be a monk.

I was very sad,

I was very sad.

I was thinking,

I don't have enough merit.

I have to go back to Australia.

It was very interesting that I was having this crisis of doubt in that particular spot,

Looking at that Hindu temple in Georgetown because I was thinking,

I have to call my sister,

Borrow some money,

Get a ticket back to Australia,

Get a job.

And then what happened was I looked above my head,

Kind of heaven-ward,

Feeling sorry for myself.

And I was sitting under one of those kind of old terrace houses and there was a little tiny Bodhi tree growing from their gutter,

Right above my head.

It was about that big.

And I thought,

Oh,

That's a different sign.

Thank goodness that little Bodhi tree seedling was there because I thought,

No,

Go back to Anachat and see.

So it turned out that the Department of Religious Affairs was moving offices at that particular time and hadn't got around to sending the letter.

So a good friend of mine who is now Ajahn Boon,

He ordained the same day as I did,

He lent me the money.

He was still a layman there and I came down another time and that time my visa was there.

So a crisis of faith in Georgetown 18 and a half years ago,

But then that auspicious sign.

It's changed a lot from what I can see from up here.

It looks like it's maybe two or three times as crowded as it used to be.

A lot of development.

There can be a city in Malaysia now.

Anyway,

We can see in our lives the way merit and also karma ripen.

So because of our karma,

Things like that can happen.

We can have periods of doubt,

Periods of struggle.

Difficult things can come up in our lives when we're trying to put forth good effort and that's actually normal.

I remember asking Ajahn Pasanno and he said,

Yeah,

Every now and then someone's letter goes missing.

It's not the first time.

Basically in our spiritual practice we have to practice perseverance.

We have to be determined to work with what seem to be obstructions.

We just have to keep going.

And you find that if you do,

It's the persevering and the keeping on trying is actually producing more merit as well.

The merits that you've made in past lives and the merits that you're currently making.

You might find that the obstructions become passable somehow and that the supports manifest and you can keep going in your spiritual practice.

Anyway,

So far it's the second day.

We've got good conditions here on top of the mountain.

Nice cool weather today.

Nice quiet place.

Harmonious gathering of sincere practitioners.

So it says it's a sitting but I think I'd like to read a little bit of Ajahn Chah.

Does anyone want to hear some Ajahn Chah?

So I'll be reading the Vrindavan Chah from this same collection,

Being Dhamma.

As I read,

It's okay to close your eyes and continue to be with the feeling of the breath.

This is listening to Dhamma meditation,

Contemplating as you hear.

In teaching the Dhamma,

Things have to be repeated over and over for people to gain real understanding.

This is normal.

It's what has to be done in order to get the important points across.

The words of the Buddha are called good speech because they lead people's minds to truth.

It is speech that is good and reasonable and full of meaning.

When it really touches the mind,

One desists from harming oneself and others and gives up the three poisons of desire,

Anger and delusion.

But some will hear it and call it wrong speech because it doesn't agree with their opinions and habits.

Actually,

The things that agree with sentient beings' minds are not always good.

In our minds there are concepts of right and wrong,

But those things are uncertain.

Good speech,

However,

Is straight,

Direct and upright.

It is neither profound nor shallow.

Rather,

It is the speech of the Buddha which has the purpose of reducing the emotional afflictions and getting free of delusion.

Such words do not merely try to follow people's personal preferences.

Some will say,

If it disagrees with me,

It isn't good.

It isn't good speech and it can't be Dharma.

But it's not a matter of that which agrees being good and that which disagrees being bad.

These are just preconceptions and biases,

The listener's habitual likes and dislikes.

If we try to have everything agree with us,

There will be no end to difficulty.

We won't want to do anything disagreeable.

Whatever we like,

We will wish to embrace and act on it,

No matter how much grief it brings.

Poisonous food may be tasty,

But there is danger later on.

The speech of the Buddha and of his disciples is all good.

It is Dharma.

But when ordinary people hear it,

They may not understand it easily if it is not presented in a way that can reach their minds.

It is not easy to see or easy to practice.

Any language is a tool to help us understand.

Language is only language.

If someone says just one word of English to me,

I don't have a clue what they're saying.

And it has no value or meaning to me,

Even though it's a popular language now.

Wherever we live,

In whatever country,

Let us speak things that help us understand right and wrong clearly.

This kind of speech is useful.

This is Dharma.

But know that hearing Dharma is for the purpose of the mind seeing and being Dharma,

Not for mere knowledge or memorization.

It should enable us to follow in the footsteps of the Buddha and practice according to what he taught.

Even though we have not yet attained realization,

We should put language to work and contemplate it.

It's easy in a way.

For example,

The Buddha said laziness and negligence are not good.

Having heard that,

When you find them arising in your mind as they will,

You recognize and know them for what they are.

Then you can escape from indolence and give rise to diligence.

When laziness arises,

It is nowhere but in the mind.

When it comes,

Let it be a cause for practicing Dharma,

Which means going against,

Reducing and transforming this laziness.

We listen to Dharma to make our minds into Dharma,

To let it arise in our minds.

If it has not yet arisen,

We strive to make it arise.

It is not so difficult to practice.

We just need to apply effort to make the mind pay attention and work like this.

You want your mind to be Dharma,

Not merely the sounds that come from your mouth.

Don't keep the knowledge in your brain or in your mouth.

Make the gates of body,

Speech and mind consistent in Dharma.

Listening to Dharma is for the purpose of knowing how to practice Dharma.

So if we say,

Practice to make it Dharma,

Then what exactly is Dharma?

Everything in this world.

Something that is not Dharma does not exist.

Forms that we can see with the eye are nothing but Dharma.

Beings in the world are all Dharma.

One meaning of Dharma is nature,

Which arises just as it is and which nobody can fashion or alter.

The nature of phenomena is Dharma.

This refers to objects,

The world of forms.

The Buddha said to see Dharma and enter Dharma,

That is to see all things as they really are.

Living beings and material objects,

As well as the inner phenomena of feeling and thinking,

All this is Dharma.

There are these two categories,

Objects that can be seen by the eye or known by the other senses and mind,

Which cannot be seen in that way.

It is nothing far away from us,

Just mind and body.

But this Dharma,

This nature,

Arises independent of our wishes,

From causes and conditions.

In the middle it changes,

And in the end it breaks up and disappears.

The Dharma of nature has power above all things.

No one can request it to become greater or less.

Natural things have their own mode of existing according to their causes.

The Dharma that we can come to request,

The precepts and teaching,

Is a tool to help us understand.

The teaching is words.

Dharma does not exist in words.

Rather,

The words are a path,

Something to point out the way to people,

Catch their minds and lead them to know and realize Dharma.

So it is said that the teaching itself is not Dharma.

We hear with the ear and speak with the tongue,

But that is not of ultimate value.

These words and concepts are not Dharma itself.

If they were actually Dharma,

They would have an independent existence of their own above all things.

So coming to understand Dharma is just a matter of working to develop the wisdom to see things according to truth,

Rather than destroying or changing anything.

Take the body as an object.

It is born of causes and conditions.

When it is born it has a certain power,

A law,

To exist in a certain way and doesn't listen to anyone.

We were born,

We were little and we grew to adulthood and got older.

Our bodies changing according to their nature.

They grow and age,

No matter what anyone says,

Thinks or wants.

It doesn't do any good to cry and moan,

To ask it to stop for even a day.

In the beginning it is born according to causes,

It develops by conditions and in the end it will break up,

Not depending on anyone's wishes or orders.

This is the nature of life,

Existing by this unchanging law.

So the Buddha taught us to look at this point.

This is extremely important.

Skin,

Teeth,

Hair and the rest,

What will you see there?

Constant change.

Having arisen they seek their own end and go on decaying on their own.

Having arisen they do not depend on the power of beings but on the power of causes and conditions that brought them into existence.

Having arisen they decay in the same way.

They don't need to ask permission or agreement of any one of us to help them grow,

Age,

Wither and die.

This happens on its own.

We don't have authority over them.

This is form,

The body,

Changing according to its own nature,

Dissolving in the end.

This is sabhava-tamba or natural conditions.

In any direction or place there will never come a day when we can argue with it or tell it,

Hey,

Listen to me,

Pay attention to my cries,

Don't get old,

Do as I say.

Nature is like this.

It is part of the Dhamma that the Buddha taught.

We are not these things,

Nor are we their owners.

If our awareness of these truths is not clear,

If instead we are deluded about nature,

It is called the Dhamma of delusion.

Then we see these things as self,

As ours,

And in terms of self and others.

This is ignorance.

And when there is ignorance,

Mental formations arise.

We struggle with things.

We want to control,

To get this or avoid that,

And fall prey to like and dislike.

This is something I like.

Please let me have more of it.

This is something I can't stand.

Please don't let it come to me.

This should be like this.

That should be like that.

Such thinking comes from delusion.

You become like someone who tries to seize another's house and field,

Taking what is not really yours.

The desires just keep on appearing in great heaps,

And you won't even know where they came from or what they are leading you to do.

Teaching and listening to Dhamma,

That this is such and that is such,

Are not really Dhamma.

They are words to point something out so that you can enter and see.

Speaking to help people see the truth is skillful means,

Or ways of teaching the Dhamma of study.

When it is only speech without actually seeing,

When you merely want to learn the words to be able to repeat them,

No benefit comes.

When you apply the words and see that this is the way things are,

The unchanging constant law arising according to causes and conditions without a self or essence,

This is actually what the Buddha was teaching about.

If you don't yet see,

There is suffering.

If you do see,

You won't long for anything.

There will be no more tears or laughter over things.

We have been crying and laughing without end since we were little children.

We have been insane,

Without rest,

Always trying to get something that is not ours,

Always in contention,

Desiring something we can never really get.

We are always living in a state of dissatisfaction and suffering.

If you listen in order to make the mind Dhamma,

And practice so that you see Dhamma,

You will finish with the problems of this life.

It can end here.

Understand that things do not exist for you to be able to season,

Modify or improve them.

They are just unalterable nature,

The way they are,

Arising and passing away.

When you have studied and practiced Dhamma,

You understand that the Buddha did not teach to fix things but to see according to truth.

If you want to change things,

That is not Dhamma,

That is not truth.

It is just the habit of someone who wants to create and manipulate.

If you do not see the truth of the way things are,

There is no path to practice and you are outside of the noble truths of suffering,

Its causes,

Its cessation and the path.

Since the very beginning of the Buddha's dispensation,

For those who hear and practice,

There has not been any requirement to adjust or modify things,

Only to know and surrender.

Wisdom is that which knows according to the truth of Sankara or conditioned phenomena.

However Sankara are,

That is what we need to know.

Sankara have their nature to arise and pass away.

Any other view of things is impure Dhamma.

The teaching of ignorance embedded in the heart.

There will be no cessation,

The wheel turning endlessly,

No solution,

No end,

No way to stop.

It's like insects crawling on the rim of a water barrel.

They are always moving but they aren't going anywhere,

Only travelling around and around the rim.

The thoughts of ordinary benighted beings are the same.

There is no finish or resolution,

They just remain in the same old place.

We may think we are headed far away but we are only going around in circles,

Always coming back to the same place.

We don't see this cycle in the heart because there is no wisdom to see.

We rely on delusion as our wisdom and real wisdom is nowhere to be found.

This ignorance becomes the manager,

There is no standard to practice by and things get out of hand.

This is not Dhamma.

In Dhamma we want to see according to the Buddha's words.

This means seeing that there is no solution,

Nothing to change or adjust because Dhamma is always complete as it is.

So we give up trying to control.

We can't increase or decrease things.

We tend to think that things aren't right,

That they are too big or too small.

Why are they too big or too small?

Because of our perception.

Such is merely the deluded desire of uninstructed people and it is as foolish and tiring as someone boxing and wrestling with a tree.

So the Buddha advised us to see according to Dhamma.

Whatever we may perceive has its existence according to nature and merely that.

If we have awareness that knows according to Dhamma then no matter what things arise there is no unhappy result.

Whatever may happen to the body will not affect us.

We will see that there is no profit from compounded phenomena and we will remain unshakable in our own place,

All things pacified.

The Buddha said to investigate this body and the other foundations of mindfulness.

There is nothing to solve or undo.

We just need to know according to the truth.

The body experiences birth,

Aging and death.

There is nothing stable in it.

Know that this reality is Dhamma,

It is the truth and there is nothing to change,

Destroy or solve.

When you get to this point there is nothing more to say.

There is no more burden to carry.

If you know according to truth there is no heedlessness about what you are doing,

Wherever you may be.

You just see things as they are,

Conditions arising and passing away.

Then what will you seek?

What will you get upset and cry about?

What do you want to toil and suffer over?

What do you want to have or be?

When will you say things are big or small,

Long or short?

In the end what will you say about nature?

There is this cycle of existence and that is all.

When you see this profound truth you will be at peace,

Free,

Without sorrow,

In conflict with no one.

Seeing natural conditions arising and changing is called studying Dhamma.

Having learned about this you should then train in it.

The person who still has cravings does not see.

If you have anger and get upset with people it is because you haven't penetrated the Dhamma.

You are still fooled by things and have no freedom.

Learning counteracts this.

Then there will be an end of problems.

There are problems only because there is the belief that there is me and mine.

When you believe things this way,

When thoughts of me and mine arise,

Countless problems will come to you endlessly.

Selfishness and all kinds of troubles appear.

When a traveller arrives at a hotel he negotiates a price for a room and informs the staff of how long he will be staying.

But as he gets comfortable there he may begin to feel like the hotel is his home and after a while he forgets about moving on.

When the management tells him that he must give up the room he refuses to leave.

This is where I live,

Why should I leave?

There is some misunderstanding and it leads to strife.

When we start to identify with our bodies and minds and think of this life as ours then we are similar to the traveller who doesn't want to leave the hotel.

We have a wrong idea about this temporary stopping place and we find ourselves always in struggle and conflict.

Children of the same parents end up fighting.

People in the same village cannot get along.

Citizens of the same country are at odds with each other all because of this attachment to what they think is a self and things belonging to the self.

So the Buddha said to come back and look at the body.

That is one Dharma to study.

There is nothing we should undo or change.

We say one who sees Sankara and is purged of attachment has happiness.

Mind is Sankara,

Body is Sankara.

Sankara are not us or ours.

Thus those who see Sankara are at peace.

They see the mind and body not as self but only as Sankara.

So I think I will read the remainder of that talk this afternoon.

It is always wonderful to read Ajahn Chah.

Set the tone for contemplating the body as a body,

Thoughts as thoughts,

Without grasping,

Without attachment,

Being willing to see these things as they are.

Nature,

Not a self,

Not mind,

Not I,

Putting down trying to control and attaching and then training in the awareness that can see these things as they are.

So for the rest of the session coming back to our breath meditation,

Aware of it as it is,

Coming in,

Staying for some time,

Passing away,

One in breath,

Some space,

One out breath,

Some space and using the meditation to help us clarify that sati,

That mindfulness which sees the truth as it is without trying to control it,

Kind of letting go,

Relaxing into the awareness that sees things as they are.

Reviews

Thank you.

Thank you

I just went "waaaaaaaauuuuw" at the hotel room part. Thank you for reading. Thank you Ajahn🙏🏿

Wonderful teachings.
Sadhu Sadhu.

Great and Clear as always ✅

Thank you. This helps me begin to notice when I start to say unskillful things. Hopefully I can practice not making quite so much karma! Mindfulness of things as they are. Blessings to all beings!

Thank you 🙏
A wonderful new way for me to look at life. Will return often to this for guidance

Thank you for this talk🌸

Thank you for another fascinating story with an inspirational message.

I really enjoyed this talk. 🙂

This is a very good teaching on Buddhist's fundamentals (in my opinion). I am learning useful and practical insight and will listen to it daily for awhile as there is, for me, a lot in this talk. Thank you to all out there who contibute your effort and energy for my well being. I am deeply grateful.

Wise words. Namaste 🙏

Very eye-opening, thank you!

There is a deep wisdom here is there a list somewhere of the common sandscript words and their approximate meanings?

Excellent.
Thanks

I'm learning so much and it is helping improve my life.

Great advice. Always a pleasure to hear your talks. Happy New Year! 🙏🏻

Deep gratitude 🙏💖

Important teaching for this day.