In this meditation we learn how to make the psychological journey from a destructive emotion that arises in you to transforming it into something more wholesome and healing for you and others.
So make your preparation.
Make your motivation focused on managing your destructive emotional tendencies and identify one in particular that is disturbing you frequently or has taken a hold of your mind,
Like fear or anxiety or anger.
Just pick one.
This is the first step on the journey to transformation.
Step two,
Really look at that emotion and consider its destructive nature,
How it makes you feel,
Where you feel it in your body,
How it takes over your rational mind and how it reaches out to others to upset them as well.
There's no need to feel guilty or bad.
This is every human being's tendencies.
We're never alone in this.
We need to recognise that we are just like everybody else,
So don't feel bad.
Step three,
Really feel strongly that you want to change and you don't want to feel this emotion because it is so destructive to yourself and others.
Be totally convinced that you're gradually going to work on this,
First of all on the rough edges and then gradually smoothing it like alchemy.
Step four,
Consider what emotion might do battle with this one,
What is going to smooth those edges?
Could you perhaps use an antidote like patience for anger,
Empathy,
Trying to put yourself into another's shoes?
Perhaps if you're feeling jealous you can generate some feeling of equanimity,
Feeling neither attachment or aversion for whoever it is,
Whoever is involved in this jealous drama that you're playing out.
Compassion is always so effective,
Just recognising that we do share this common frailty if you like,
This tendency to protect ourselves,
Our ego jumping up and wanting to be right and have compassion for how awful that makes everybody feel,
Whatever you feel others feel and you know it's unpleasant,
Obsessive,
Agitating,
Interrupting your sleep,
Filling you with some sense of anxiety,
Paranoia even.
And if you really feel that there's somebody unpleasant out there that you have a strong feeling for like hatred,
Then how about some loving kindness,
Enjoying their lives,
Not really knowing their lives,
Why they are the way they are,
Perhaps as they have to deal with other people's dislike because their character or personality is so bound up with their ego defence system.
And maybe a few of these might work for you,
Make a decision on which constructive emotions you're going to generate and trust your intuition,
Let it come,
What feels comfortable,
What feels natural,
Don't make it hard work.
So this is your emotional weapon,
The best kind,
Getting to the root of your problems and helping to smooth out all those experiences that feel jagged,
Difficult,
Tricky,
Taking away those difficulties.
And then step five,
Being as creative as you wish,
Start to generate the constructive emotion for that person or people,
No matter how much your ego is arguing with you,
Just try it,
Quieten the ego and let this wonderful intuitive spiritual self emerge more strongly.
Just imagine their conditioning,
The influences on them,
What makes them the way they are,
What led to them doing what they have done that upsets you so much.
You don't have to like them,
You don't have to approve them,
But without compassion,
We remain like animals just trying to survive and compassion is such a powerful tool,
Such a powerful weapon,
Along with the other antidote emotions.
And recognise how much they will be suffering too.
Visualise them as they might be,
Lonely,
Low self-esteem which perhaps presents as arrogance,
Confused,
Desperate,
Delusional,
Whatever.
Your ego will fight you on this,
But just move forward with the practice one slow step at a time until you start to notice that you have calmed down and are actually feeling and generating the constructive emotion.
Step six.
Enjoy the positive feelings that you are feeling as much as you can.
Identify that without that person or people you would not have been able to generate this transformation and actually feel grateful to them for giving you this opportunity to develop your mind.
And finally,
Step seven.
Just remove yourself slightly from your analysis and mindfully observe how your state of mind is now less agitated and more calm and stable.
Also notice that your attitude to that person or people has diminished.
That's it.
You're in emotional heaven.
So enjoy the feeling of bliss and high self-esteem while you can.
And congratulate yourself.
This is an incredible lesson and a powerful method for not just transforming our emotions but transforming our lives,
Our relationships.
And because you have done this once it will be easier the next time.
It will become a psychological pattern that you return to again and again whenever you meet distress.
